Chapter 42

Diesel

"Maybe I should try this, too?" Shay-Lee asked, holding a denim crop top in front of him.

After getting up around noon, Shay-Lee suggested we go buy some clothes. It was a sweet idea, considering how neither he nor I had anything on us after we both left home with nothing but the clothes on our backs.

"It's a bit boring, but maybe try this one." I pulled a wool vest from the hanger and pushed it his way.

Taking the vest from me, he scanned it before nodding. "I'll try it on. Wanna come take a peek at me?" he teased, a naughty smile on his face. It would've been a perfect face were it not for the black eye his father had given him.

Whenever that prick snuck into my thoughts, I had to pull myself back together only so I wouldn't break someone's face again like I did with Andrei.

Shit.

Yesterday was an utter disaster.

Since getting involved with Shay-Lee, I'd often thought about Andrei and the others' reactions. I knew it would be bad, only not that bad. Sure, I'd already lost faith in Andrei when he started acting like an ass months ago, but Chief? A part of me expected more from him. Turned out he was just further proof of how fake people could be. Fuck him. Fuck Andrei. And fuck all the other righteous idiots who had their heads shoved up their asses.

Yet, no matter how angry I was with them, I hadn't expected to lose my shit the way I had. I would've completely lost it were it not for Shay-Lee pulling me off Andrei.

After I left Shay-Lee in the motel room, I went to the store, thinking it would clear my head, only it didn't, and I rushed back to the motel to find Shay-Lee getting ready to leave. It broke me. The thought that I had scared him off tore me apart, and I couldn't hold it together anymore.

Thankfully, Shay-Lee didn't nudge me away, and for the first time, he took the lead. When he climbed on top and rode me? It threw me under a spell. His spell. Unable to speak, I could only lie there and grant him complete control over me. I felt drugged, intoxicated, and the peak of the high was the strangling. I had never been interested in being the one getting choked, but last night, it worked. The lack of control was exactly what I needed, and he realized it. Shay-Lee understood what I needed better than I did. Just another reason why I loved him.

Yeah, I was in love with the crazy fucker, more than was considered healthy. My feelings for him bordered on obsession, to the point that I wanted to tie him to me so he could never leave. Even with Shay-Lee in the fitting room for a few minutes, I couldn't leave his side for a second.

Running out of patience, I walked over there. "So, how does it look?" I leaned against the wall in front of his stall.

Shay-Lee stepped out with the vest on a moment later, and I whistled. He looked gorgeous.

"Like what you're seeing?" He posed while flexing his biceps.

"Obviously."

"Well, of course you do. I'm gorgeous." He grinned, making my eyes roll. What an arrogant brat.

"Modesty is definitely not your thing."

He pretended to gag. "Eww, no. Modesty is for ugly people."

I tried to hold back my laughter because he was being serious. The guy was fucked in the head.

"Okay, I'm going to change back, and then we can go to the next shop. How about Ranieri? My favorite store of theirs is just around the corner."

"Whatever you want, Kitten." I pulled my phone out and checked the time when I heard some giggling. Looking over my shoulder, I saw a bunch of girls, who were no older than fourteen, staring at us while exchanging glances and whispering.

What the fuck?

I was ready to go over to them and ask what their problem was when Shay-Lee grabbed my arm.

"Just ignore them."

"Ignore them? Who the fuck are they?" My eyebrows shot to my hairline.

Already back inside the fitting room, Shay-Lee spoke. "From their age and excitement, I guess they know me from my socials, so just ignore them."

"They what now?"

Opening the door and stepping out, Shay-Lee added the vest to the pile of clothes I was already carrying for him.

"Social media. You know I got like three million followers just on Insta, right?"

"Yeah, and it's still a wonder to me. What you post there is full-on crap."

He laughed. "Says the guy who posts pictures of his plants."

"One picture," I corrected him while following him to the cashier. "And it wasn't a plant but a cactus."

It was still beyond me how Shay-Lee managed to track down my Insta account, which Jessie opened for me two years ago, and I had only posted once.

"Why are you defending it? I think it's adorable." He beamed over his shoulder, and it made my heart skip a fucking beat. Goddamn him.

We continued arguing until we reached the register, and the guy working there began scanning the many items Shay-Lee chose, one by one. Stunned by the price of each item, I turned and looked around the store. What the fuck made a shirt worth five hundred dollars? I'd have to teach Shay-Lee that dressing nice didn't necessarily mean expensive. I bet it would be hard, given that his watch alone cost more than Kai's motorcycle.

"What do you mean my card doesn't work?" Shay-Lee's sudden reaction made me turn quickly. "Check again," he demanded, his brows pinched close and his eyes focused on the poor guy.

"I'm sorry, sir, but it keeps saying the card is declined."

"Declined my ass," Shay-Lee snapped, smacking his hand on the counter.

"Hey, now." I reached for Shay-Lee's arm and pulled him back. "No reason to get angry."

"No reason to get angry? This idiot decided that my card has been declined. My cards are never declined."

"P-perhaps you reached your limit?"

Shay-Lee's face turned red. "Reached my limit?" His eyes went so wide it looked like they'd pop out of his head. "I don't have limits. Do you know who the fuck I am?"

Shit.

Sometimes I forgot what an entitled asshole he was.

Shrugging me off him, Shay-Lee pointed his finger at the guy's face. "Now you listen to me, you minimum-wage—"

"Okay, that's enough," I said, cutting him off before he could finish spitting out more offensive crap, and pulled him two steps back.

"What are you doing?" Shay-Lee asked while struggling against me to go back over there.

A crowd was forming, so I kept my voice low. "Maybe you should check your bank account before unleashing your wrath on a clueless worker who's just doing his job?"

He frowned. "Check my bank account? Why the fuck would I do that?"

"Jesus, Shay-Lee, I don't know. Maybe 'cause it's your dad's money?" His eyes widened with fear. I felt guilty for being so direct, but how could he not figure it out himself?

Panicked, Shay-Lee pulled out his phone, quickly unlocked it, and entered his banking app.

"Son of a bitch!" he snapped, ready to toss the phone on the floor, when I grabbed his arm and stopped him while sheltering him from the busy room. We definitely had too many eyes on us.

"H-he denied my access to all of my accounts," Shay-Lee mumbled, fisting his hair, oblivious to our surroundings. "I'm broke. I'm fucking broke. What the fuck am I supposed to do?" His chin trembled, and his eyes rimmed red.

"Calm down." When I tried to reach for him, he slapped my hand away, which pissed me off. My expression must have given my anger away since Shay-Lee somewhat returned to his senses.

"I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to," he mumbled, looking around while biting on the tip of his nail.

"It's okay. Let's get out of here."

When he nodded, I wrapped my arm around his shoulders and led him out of the store. The group of girls from the changing room took a few photos, but with how I shielded Shay-Lee, I doubted they got him in the frame. I'd never noticed the reaction he got in public until today. Then again, we'd hardly ever met outside of school or the club.

Shay-Lee kept his cool until we were outside the shopping center, but as soon as we reached his car, he broke down again.

"You don't get it," he snapped after I told him he should take a breath. "I can't be poor. I just can't. I can't survive without money." He suddenly broke out into a laugh. "I'm that pathetic. I'm so pathetic I don't know how to do shit by myself." His breath caught, and he put one hand on his chest and the other on his waist. "I don't know how to do laundry. Do you? Because I sure as hell don't."

I chuckled at the irony. He'd lost everything, and here he was, worrying about knowing how to wash clothes.

"What are you laughing at?"

"Laundry. That's your worry?"

"Fuck no," he snarled. "Where would we stay? You think I can live in a tiny-ass room like that for the rest of my life? What would I wear? Oh God—" He dropped to the ground and rested his back against his car. "I can't survive in the wild. I'm a spoiled, needy, helpless guy who loves his luxury."

Sitting beside him, I threw my hand around his body and pulled him so his head rested against my chest. "You're definitely a spoiled brat, but I've got you."

He looked up at me, his eyes narrowed.

"What's with that face?" I poked his nose.

"What do you mean you've got me?"

"Well." I rested my head back against the car. "I've got enough money saved from working for Dion and from when I worked at the beach club. It's not nearly as much as what you're used to, but it's enough until—" I then stopped. Until what? We hadn't talked about the future. We promised never to leave each other, but what exactly did we plan on doing after graduation?

Shay-Lee didn't seem to be bothered as he continued to pout and rant about not wanting to take my money. To be honest, I didn't mind paying for whatever he needed. In fact, I liked that idea. I'd much rather he relied on me than on his prick of a dad.

"I can't have you wasting your money on me," he said.

"It's only for now," I explained, stretching my legs over the asphalt. Sitting on the ground of a parking lot wasn't ideal, but at least no one was around. "We have a bit over a month until graduation. Let's make it till then and see what the plan is."

Shay-Lee sighed. "Graduation, huh? I didn't even think about that." He chuckled. "Seems so pointless, doesn't it? Going to school, pretending to be kids."

He had a point.

"I agree, but it is what it is. We came this far. Dropping out would just be stupid. And unlike you, I'm nineteen. Do you even realize how pathetic being a nineteen-year-old high school dropout sounds?"

He laughed. "Shit, I forgot you're a year older."

Ruffling his hair, I pulled him closer and kissed him on his face. He felt so warm in my arms that I never wanted to let him go.

"So let's just decide we're going to get through these few weeks, then we can worry about the rest later."

"And what about the money?"

A thought then occurred to me. "Can't you make money from your socials? From collabs and shit?"

He shook his head. "My father has me under contracts forbidding me from doing that."

Son of a bitch. As much as I hated the man, I needed to stay calm, only so Shay-Lee wouldn't lose it again.

Scratching my jaw, I shrugged. "So like I said, I have enough to get us what we need to get around. Your dad is clearly trying to push you into a corner, and fuck me if I'll let him succeed." My arm pulled him tighter. "So you'll have to get used to living in a tiny-ass room with me."

Pouting his lips, he then huffed. "I guess if we're sharing a bed, I'll find a way to deal with it."

"Yeah?"

"Do you sleep naked?"

"Often."

"So yeah." He grinned. "Definitely."

Ugh, the brat.