Chapter 10

Diesel

"?Qué pasa, Principito?"

"Nothing's wrong," I answered my brother, sitting in front of me with his hands resting on the metal table. We were currently seated in the prison visiting room, surrounded by other inmates and visitors. Since he started doing his time, I made sure to visit Iván at least once a week.

"You can't fool me," my brother said in Spanish, leaning closer. "Why so blue?"

Growing up, we were close, mainly because he was only six years older, but also due to us sticking together to protect our mom and sister from the man we called father. Our padre, who died of a cardiac arrest in prison four years ago, was a mean son of a bitch who enjoyed taking his frustration out on his family. Now, Iván and I were the only ones left of our family.

"I'm just tired, that's all."

"Because of the club?"

Crossing my arms over my chest, I nodded, and he swore.

"I told you not to work for Dion."

"It keeps you safe."

"Fuck keeping me safe, Principito. I'm the older brother. I need to keep you safe." Principito—Mamá used to call me that. It meant little prince in Spanish. She called me her little prince because, according to her, I was the most beautiful kid she'd ever seen.

"Just shut up." I shifted the toothpick I was chewing on from one corner of my mouth to the other before taking it out. "It's not that bad… but sometimes the hours are hard."

"What about school?" His question made me laugh, and in response, he frowned. "The fuck you laughing at?"

"Who gives a shit about school?"

"I do."

"You didn't even go to high school."

"Because, unlike you, I'm an idiot." He scratched his thick stubble, then moved his hand to play with his golden necklace. "We always knew you and Carmen were the smart ones of the family."

The mention of her tightened my chest with memories and longing. And even though it had been years, the grief over her death never diminished. It hurt today just as much as it did back then, only now I was no longer a kid, so it was easier to bottle up the pain.

"Her birthday's coming soon, isn't it?"

Staring at my hands, the muscle in my jaw tensed, I nodded.

"How old would she be?"

"Twenty-nine." If it weren't for the rich son of a bitch who thought he was entitled enough to rape and then murder her, my older sister would still be alive.

"You're going to put some flowers on her grave?"

"Yeah."

"Then put some from me, too, okay?" he said, holding my stare. Iván, Carmen, and Mamá all shared the same beautiful hazel eyes. Unlike them, I got my father's. Eyes so dark they looked like coals.

"I will."

He gave me a big smile, and suddenly, I was pissed. I was pissed off because if it weren't for him being an idiot, he wouldn't have ended up here. If he truly cared about me, he wouldn't have gotten his hands dirty with drugs. But then again, who was I kidding? It was just a matter of time before I'd join him.

"I've got good news," he said, cutting my line of thoughts. "There's a good chance the parole board will accept my request for early release."

Wait, what?

"Are you serious?" Pushing aside my shock, I focused on the facts. He'd already done four out of the five years he got.

"Yes. If everything goes right, I should be out by this summer."

I knew hoping for something like that would be foolish, but I couldn't help it. Biting back my smile, I swallowed the lump of emotion that formed in my throat. Fuck. The idea of Iván being out just shifted something inside me.

Laughing, he leaned closer. "You get that, Principito? I can be out in six months."

"Yeah." I smiled, moving a hand through my short hair. "You'll finally meet everyone." I didn't know why I said that. It wasn't like I planned to stick around with Chief and the others once I finished school. Since my plans with Andrei were tossed in the garbage, I had no reason to stay. Before he met Miles, Andrei and I had planned to go to Bali together, but he blew me off by taking the job his twink's dad had offered him without hesitation.

"How's Andrei doing?" Iván asked because, usually, Andrei was the one I talked about the most.

"Happy with his boyfriend."

He smirked. "Someone's jealous?"

"Fuck off."

"Listen to me, Principito. What you need is a good girl who'll take care of you. How about you find me one as well?"

My mind was suddenly filled with images of golden hair, broad shoulders, beautiful red lips, and brilliant blue eyes that did not at all belong to a girl. Since last night, he was pretty much all I thought about.

"Not going to happen," I grunted, and he laughed again. I loved his laugh.

I wanted to stay longer and hear more of his stories, but just then, the guard announced to the room that visiting hours were over, and we had no choice but to say goodbye. Standing, Iván pulled me into a tight embrace, which I returned. Being shorter than me, he had to stretch out. Ready to let go, he kissed my cheek. "Hasta luego, Principito."

"Just don't go anywhere." I grinned.

Rolling his eyes, he cursed me and then let go. With my hands shoved in my pockets, I watched the guards escort him out of the room and back to prison. Being here always made me feel sick to my stomach. Not only did it remind me of the time I spent in juvie, but it was also a window to my future—a small glimpse of what was waiting for me. As much as I hated to face reality, I knew it wasn't a question of if but when I'd go to prison.