Chapter 5

Kate

This can all end right now.

One quick conversation and it’s done.

I know the kind of guy Chad is. He’ll understand. He always understands.

He’ll have a lot of questions for me, but that’s okay.

‘Chad, we should talk about something quick. This is going to sound really weird, but like ten years ago my ex went to prison. I was with him when he got arrested. I was actually put in handcuffs for a bit. It was kind of scary. I lived a different life then. I wasn’t a bad person or anything. I didn’t commit crimes. Anyway, my ex got out of prison and showed up here today. I know. I know, you want to freak out right now. He wasn’t mean or anything like that. It was shocking, that’s for sure. I did something stupid though. I panicked and deleted the video of him at the door. I don’t know why. I think I just wanted to pretend he didn’t exist. I’m really sorry about that. I don’t know what to do next here…’

I’m sitting on the edge of the bed as I play that conversation out over and over.

What exactly would Chad do?

Well, knowing him, he’d call up a lawyer friend. He’d figure out what can or cannot be done. I’m sure he’d have someone contact Corbin to let him know to stay away from me and the house. He’d probably then use Corbin’s parole officer too.

“Hey, Kate, are you okay?” Chad asks.

He’s standing in a towel.

He’s skinny. Not skeletal skinny. He’s got some tone.

But, you know, he’s not winning any awards for taking his shirt off.

I blink a few times.

“You’ve been off since I got home. Are you pissed that I was gone today?”

“No,” I say. “I’m just… tired. I feel weird.”

“You know what? I’m really tired myself. I’m going to hit that pillow and be gone.”

As soon as Chad says that, my heart jumps. My skin breaks out in goosebumps.

That’s what’s secretly on my mind.

I’m not going to have a conversation with Chad about Corbin.

I need Chad to crawl into bed and fall asleep.

I have to obey what Corbin wants me to do.

It’s dark in the bedroom.

My life is reduced to silhouettes.

A small little bit of light coming from the bathroom.

Next to me, the man I’ve said I love is finally asleep.

At the first sound of that gentle snore, I bite my bottom lip and get to work.

I can’t believe how eager I am for this. My heart is racing but I’m not freaking out. I’m not panicking. I’m not… feeling guilty…

There is a voice in my head that tells me to reach over and grab for Chad.

I can slide his fingers down between my legs and show him what I want. How I want it. I can grab his cock and squeeze it hard. Pump it hard. Hint to him what I want.

Another voice in my head screams and keeps screaming.

I just want to be fucked! Is that so wrong? I want to be tossed around! Thrown around! I want to be used! I want to be… I want…

I swallow hard and ignore that voice.

My right hand eases into the front of my pajama pants, along my soft, warm mound, and between my legs.

I keep myself clean shaven at all times.

I ache for the moment that someone— Chad —will just grab me at a random time and do something. Like when I’m cooking dinner, why can’t he just crouch down behind me, then pull my pants and panties down? Why can’t he tease me and play with me back there … Then turn me around and kiss my mouth. And then…

My hips start to rock as my fingers dip into my pussy.

I’m swollen and very much wet.

I take a deep breath, nice and slow.

I don’t want to wake Chad because he is no longer allowed to be part of this moment.

Plus, if he catches me masturbating, I’m not sure what he’d do.

He’s never seen me do this before. On my own. I’ve never seen him do it either.

For some reason, that seems weird.

Is that wrong? To want to have someone watch me fuck myself? Or to watch someone fuck themself?

I have to stop doing this… I have to stop these thoughts invading me…

I slowly remove the covers off my body. I fold and stack them in a way that there’s a barrier between Chad and me. Next, I carefully slide my pants down. Just below my knees. I then put my feet together and open my legs in a butterfly kind of position.

I look down at myself.

My mound. My pussy.

I lick my bottom lip.

My body is warm. No. It’s hot.

I have the wild urge that I want to taste my own pussy.

My thoughts rage. My body rages even more.

I slide my fingers between my legs once more, collecting wetness on every fingertip except my thumb.

My teeth chatter as I bring my fingers toward my mouth.

I’m shaking and burning and I feel so…

No. No, Kate. You’re normal. This is fine.

Those words moved through my head in the voice of Corbin.

I skip tasting my fingertips and place my hand back between my legs.

Middle and ring fingers together, stroking hard and fast, making a backward C shape. Rubbing my dripping labia and touching my clit.

Over and over… faster and faster…

Harder.

I press my feet together. My butt flexes and tightens.

My stomach starts to shake.

I grit my teeth.

My eyes look to the right.

I have to make sure Chad doesn’t wake up.

All I want to do right now is scream out with pleasure. I want to yell and kick and thrash. I want to slam my fingers into my pussy and make myself soak the sheets.

See, this is Corbin torturing me.

Telling me what to do and knowing he won’t be here and knowing I won’t be able to make noise. He’s testing my relationship with Chad. He hates that I’m wearing an engagement ring.

He’s been in fucking prison for ten years!

How can he just show up like this?

How can he just start commanding me?

He’s been gone!

None of it makes sense, but my fingers between my legs certainly feels good.

Really good.

Orgasmic good.

My inner thighs tremble.

I’m really close now.

I can’t stop thinking about Corbin at the front door.

The balls of him. The nerve of him.

I think about Corbin just stepping into the house and grabbing me. Turning me around. He opens my pants and pulls them down. His right hand cracks so hard against my ass, I’ll have a mark there for a week. I won’t be able to sit down on my right ass cheek. That’s how strong Corbin is. That’s just from one smack of his hand to my ass!

My pussy throbs and then floods.

My left hand grabs the edge of the bed.

I turn my head to the left and let out a slow exhale, gently groaning, but not loud enough to wake Chad.

I can’t believe how hard I’m coming right now.

I feel the wet pulses between my legs.

The sheets are going to be soaked and I’m going to have to sleep in the mess I’ve made.

Chad suddenly sucks in a breath and I freeze.

My inner thighs shake. So does my pussy.

I’m done but I’m not done .

This is just a tease. An awful tease.

But I’m not finished yet.

This is just the first part of Corbin’s demands…

There’s one more thing I have to do.

I know there’s going to be a flash from the camera if I stay in bed.

I manage to sneak out of the bed, my pajama pants down to my knees still.

There’s no way it’s not funny the way I must look right now, hobbling my way toward the bathroom.

Pants at my knees, a phone in my hand, my pussy still coming .

Once I’m in the bathroom, I hide behind the slightly open door.

I slid my right hand between my legs one more time, collecting all the wet, warm sticky cum caused by my orgasm.

I then hold my hand out, looking at the gooey strings of pleasure between my fingers.

My face burns red-hot. My entire body tingles. I cannot express how turned on I am right now. Or how badly I need a moment like this. I feel alive, okay? I feel fucking alive! I don’t care about the HOA fees or the color of the neighbor’s fence. I don’t care about off-street parking or the sound of Chet McCullum’s lawnmower or the fact that he cuts his grass every Sunday at exactly one in the afternoon, which bothers everyone in the neighborhood.

All of that is fake.

It’s nothing.

It’s nonsense.

I hold my phone with my left hand and take a clear picture of my fingers.

I then open my texts and type in Corbin’s name.

Nothing pops up.

Duh!

I remember that I have his name listed as Dentist .

My cheeks flush. I grit my teeth.

I attach the picture of my fingers, covered in my sticky wetness.

My thumb hovers over the screen, then I finally send it.

I quickly toss my phone to the bathroom sink counter and I look at myself in the mirror.

I hear a voice in the back of my head.

What have you done, Kate?!

You masturbated thinking of another man and then sent a picture to that man!

You have a fiancé! You have a house! You have a nice car! You have a good life!

I smile and ignore that voice.

I don’t give a fuck about any of that.

Want to know all I can think about right now?

What Corbin’s next desire is going to be…