MATEO

MATEO

This is what happened to Embry while Folk and Alexei were planning their batshit bombing raid. I get a lot of DMs and emails about this, so I'm super happy (ish) to share this part of their story with you.

I'd never lived in a house. It was one thing me and Em had in common, though his fairground childhood was a million miles away from the Islington tower block I'd grown up in.

Still, this house, man. The one he'd bought for us because Cam told him to. I liked it and all, but I didn't know what the ever-loving fuck to do with myself when I was in it. Didn't know how to behave, and he was no help. So here we were, poking at Netflix at nine o'clock in the evening, with no real idea why. Well, I was poking at Netflix, piggybacking on Rubi's account. Lili was drawing. And Em…I glanced behind me, to the couch, and that fucker was asleep, again .

Worry gnawed at my heart. I reached for him on instinct but changed my mind at the last second. The shitty doctor at the shitty hospital had told me to let him rest when he wanted to rest. Like eighty hours of sleep every day was gonna fix a problem they hadn't looked hard enough to find.

I withdrew my hand and settled back on the floor. Embry shifted, curling his body around me, his forehead somehow making contact with my shoulder.

Frowning, I rubbed his knee, and he made a low, pained sound, letting me know he was, in fact, awake, but he didn't want to be.

"Dad, can we have pizza?"

I waited before I answered Liliana, unsure of who she was talking to. I was her father, but she called me Papá most often, and saved the dad shit for Embry. Because he fucking deserved it for every damn thing he did for my kid.

Embry didn't answer.

I swallowed a sigh. "If you want. Just make sure it charges Rubi's card, yeah?"

"Papá, you can't do that. It's mean."

"It's funny."

"Your jokes are really bad."

"That's why I make ‘em. Because Uncle Rubi has taught you to laugh at me, not with me."

Liliana rolled her eyes and stole the phone I used for civilised things. She thumbed around, searching for food she'd take three bites of and push away, and right now, that was something she had in common with Embry.

I felt him shift behind me.

Chanced a glance to find him pushing himself upright.

I knew better than to help him, but it damn near killed me.

"You hungry?" I ventured instead.

"Nah."

"Tea?"

"I'm fine."

He wasn't. Sometimes I looked at him and wondered if he was dying. Because that's how it looked, his pale face and shadowed eyes. The weight he'd dropped over the past month. The insane fatigue. The only thing missing was the blood oozing from the stab wound in his belly.

Nausea rocked me. I rubbed my lips, wishing I hadn't made a vow to smoke less when we were at home.

Coffee then…

Nope. I'd made a stupid resolution about that too.

Fuck my life—my perfect life. Man, I was so fucking scared to lose it.

Embry lay down again and Liliana ordered the smallest pizza in the world. I added another one in case Embry changed his mind and wanted to eat, but I knew he wouldn't. These days, only Cam's cooking could get him to eat more than a mouse, and Cam wasn't here. He had shit of his own to deal with.

Liliana chose a Spanish soap opera to watch.

Elite .

Ten minutes in, I realised it was raunchy as hell and turned it off, much to her disgust.

"I'm not a baby."

"You're not a teenager either."

Yet . Because I needed something else to worry about.

My phone buzzed.

Rubi: Mario's called. I stole your pizza

Mateo: as if i gve a fuck

Rubi: I know you don't. I'm bringing it over to the hungry kids who might x

"Rubi's coming over," I said to no one in particular.

Just as well. By now, Em really was asleep, and Liliana was still annoyed about the Netflix fiasco.

"I'm going to have a bath," she announced, and stomped upstairs.

"Be careful," I called after her. "Use the mat so you don't slip."

The bathroom door slammed, and I reminded myself that her tweenage bullshit made me the luckiest man alive. That, and the piece of my heart flaked out on the sofa.

Without Liliana to distract me, I gave Embry my full attention. He was curled into the back of the couch, a cushion half hiding his face, an arm wrapped around his abdomen. I put a hand to his neck, wincing at the coolness seeping from his skin. It was high fucking summer—I was roasting—but the love of my life was cold to the bone.

This ain't right.

I'd said it a thousand times, but no fucker was listening.

"Em." I pushed the cushion away. "You wanna go to bed?"

Silence. Then Embry inhaled a weak breath and opened his eyes. "Are you coming too?"

I absorbed the barely-there flirtation, letting it ease the deep ache in my chest. "What would you do if I did?"

"Depends what you asked me for."

I never asked him for anything in bed, sexually or otherwise. I just thanked God on the regular that he wanted me right there with him, and that the nightmare I kept having about waking up to find him dead beside me existed only in my imagination.

Embry gave up waiting for me to answer him. He pushed himself upright and covered his mouth with a shaky hand. Was he gonna puke? I was getting worse at figuring that out, it was so fucking random.

"You okay?"

Irritation flashed in his storm-hued eyes. "I'm fine."

Liar . But the fire in his gaze kept me quiet, though I'd take angry Embry over sick and tired Embry any day of the week, as long as he didn't kill anyone.

Anyone else, you mean.

Embry rose from the couch, his hand pressed to his abdomen before he caught me staring and dropped it. "You should ask me for stuff. Don't be so scared of what you want."

"How'd you know I want anything?"

"It's in your eyes. I'm gonna miss that."

"Miss it? Why? Where are you going?"

Embry frowned, confusion colouring his tired gaze. "Upstairs."

"Cielito, you don't have to miss me from up there. I'll come with you."

Bikes sounded outside before I could move. More bewilderment creased Embry's face. "Who's that?"

"Rubi. He stole our pizza."

"What?"

"Don't worry about it." I stood and moved to him, pressing a sneaky kiss to his cool cheek. "Go lie down."

I gripped his shoulders and turned him towards the stairs.

He drifted away. I lingered to make sure he didn't stack it on the stairs, knowing full well that Rubi wasn't going to wait for me to let him in. Bastard had a key, and he wasn't afraid to use it.

Embry made it upstairs as the front door opened and closed.

Rubi appeared in the living room doorway a few seconds later, minus his boots and riding jacket, pizza boxes stacked in his big arms.

I frowned. "We didn't order all that."

Rubi eyed me as River materialised behind him. "You only ordered enough for a dwarf goat. If I'm paying for your dinner, that shit ain't the one. Where's Em?"

"Upstairs."

Rubi's stare intensified, reading between the lines. "Asleep?"

"Think so."

"Want me to check?"

"Nah. Lili's in the bath. They can supervise each other."

"Fair enough. Take these then."

Rubi unloaded the pizza boxes into my arms and ventured further into the house, dropping his massive self onto the couch.

River hovered in the hallway. For a certified O'Brian, he was sometimes as shit at peopling as I was. Or maybe I was doing something with my face that put him off.

I tried to fix it.

Rubi chucked a cushion at me. "If you need a dump, mate. Just go."

The cushion bounced off me and landed on the floor. River picked it up and set it back on the couch. "Behave, boo. Give me those, brother. I'll put your kettle on."

The game of pass the pizza continued.

River took them into the kitchen and messed around making tea. Watching him move around my space settled something inside me and I flopped onto the couch beside Rubi.

He nudged me. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"That your real life answer?"

These days, me and Rubi were so tight that past me would've thought this shit was an acid trip, but there was nothing pissing me off that he didn't already know about, and I wasn't in the mood to rehash it.

Instead, I let loose a grumbly sigh.

"All right, mate." Rubi rubbed my arm. "Just drink your tea and eat your dinner. And let us know if you want us to fuck off."

"I don't want that."

My answer was quick enough that Rubi laughed. He got up and came back with a plate of pizza that he forced into my hand.

River appeared next with a mug of coffee—brother knew I didn't drink pond water tea. "I made that mint stuff for Embry. Is he awake?"

"I don't know—fuck!" An elfin pile of damp dark hair and slender limbs collided with my body. " Lili . Warn me before you bomb onto my lap."

My kid didn't give a shiny shit. She kissed my cheek, then abandoned me for Rubi.

Fair.

Rubi bear-hugged her, making her giggle up a storm. "Where's your other dad?"

Liliana shrugged. "I didn't see him."

"What good are you then?" Rubi tweaked her nose and stole a slice of pizza from the plate. "'Spose I better eat this then go and check, eh?"

"He'll be asleep. He's always asleep."

The nonchalant way my kid spat those facts killed my appetite.

I passed my plate to her.

She passed it to River, and he ditched it on the coffee table.

"For fuck's sake," Rubi growled. "Doesn't anyone eat around here anymore?"

Liliana sniffed. "It looks weird."

"You look weird."

Lili poked her tongue out. Rubi slapped it with a slice of salami and that was my world right now, folks. The only thing missing was the love of my fucking life.

Liliana ate the salami.

Satisfied, Rubi stood with her in his arms and deposited her in the space he'd vacated. "Right, I'm going to check on the boss. When I get back, you lot better have smashed some of that pizza or I'm gonna be really fucking cross."

He wouldn't be. Just wound up that he couldn't fix everyone with unconditional kindness. Fuck, we didn't deserve him— I didn't deserve him.

The others did. I watched my kid slither off the couch and migrate into River's orbit, collecting her sketchbook along the way. Watched him grin and engage with her as if she'd known him her whole fucking life. Combined with Rubi's heavy tread on the stairs, the churn in my guts faded a touch. I still missed Em so much my soul ached, but he was upstairs with Rubi.

He's okay. He's ? —

A loud thump sounded above me. I jumped out of my skin.

Embry—

"Mats! Get up here."

Rubi's panicked shout hit me like a truck, ripping me from the couch. Abandoning Liliana to River, I bolted for the stairs, taking them two at a time.

The bedroom I shared with Embry was at the top, door open, rumpled bed empty.

Blood on the floor.

Blood on the floor.

I lurched onto the landing, scrambling for the loose floorboard where I kept a weapon. Just a hammer, but I could kill a man with a baby sledge?—

"Mats."

Rubi's voice came from the bathroom, lower this time, but somehow more urgent. I whirled around, more blood soaking into my socked feet, still halfway reaching for the hammer. But no weapon was going to save me from the horror show playing out on my bathroom floor.

From the sight of my husband unconscious in Rubi's arms.

Skin white as snow.

Blood staining his blue lips.

"Em?" A whisper, but it deafened me, and Rubi's next words were as loud as a two-ton bomb.

"Call a fucking ambulance, Mats. Then you need to help me with CPR."