Chapter 5

Five

Harper

I spent the weekend catching up on laundry and spending time with Evie. I enjoyed the time we had together. Before we hired new wedding planners, Ireland and Aria, I attended weddings on the weekends too, but I didn’t need to be present. As the manager, I could oversee things from my tablet.

Now I had to go to family dinner with this issue of Leo hanging over me. The last few days, it was like Leo finally saw me as a woman he might find attractive. The way he’d acted when I arrived at the restaurant on Friday night, how he’d checked in on Evie and then sent us home early, as if he cared about me. And I hadn’t expected him to stop by the apartment when he got off work.

The entire time I lived here, no one from the Giovanni family had stopped by. The only one who’d been inside was Gia, and she always called or texted first. It was like they went out of their way to make it feel like any other apartment rental. Except they gave me an amazing deal on the rent.

They didn’t want to invade my space, and I appreciated that because, inside the Giovanni family, there didn’t seem to be boundaries between the family members.

When Leo dropped that little bomb that I was like his sister, I was disappointed, which was ridiculous because, of course, he saw me that way. I was just like any other member of his family. I worked at the restaurant, and I helped out whenever they called. I lived in their apartment and used his mother for babysitting. I wasn’t a potential date. I’d always be his younger sister’s friend, a part of their family. It was what I’d always wanted.

Even though I knew nothing had really changed, I’d let myself hope that something had for a few days. Then everything came crashing back down to earth, and reality exploded in my face.

Why would Leo look at me in any other way? I was an idiot for thinking he had. That one dance at a wedding made me think that something was possible between us.

When I got to his parents’ house, Evie rushed into the kitchen, excited to be part of everything. At home, it was quiet with just the two of us. Here, everyone was loud and boisterous. Someone was always teasing someone else, and there was always too much food.

Mrs. G. spent the day making homemade pasta and sauce, and by the time everyone showed up to eat, the house smelled like marinara sauce.

When I lived with my mom, I was responsible for making food for myself, so I ate a lot of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and mac and cheese. Things that kept in the pantry for a long time.

Once I’d befriended Gia, I was invited over for meals more often, and I loved the closeness and the love. It made me long for things I couldn’t have.

Evie ran straight for Leo because they’d always had a close relationship. He lifted her high in his arms, saying how big she’d gotten since he’d seen her last. She giggled as he kissed her and then blew raspberries on her cheeks.

She wiped her cheek with a look of disgust on her face. “Don’t spit on me.”

Leo paused, his eyes wide. “That’s not spitting. I gave you raspberries.”

Evie shook her head. “Mrs. Walters said it’s spitting.”

“Who is Mrs. Walters? Your teacher?” Leo asked Evie and then looked to me for confirmation.

At my nod, he said, “Mrs. Walters doesn’t know what she’s talking about.”

“Leo,” I admonished. Even if I didn’t agree with everything a teacher said, I taught Evie to respect it.

“I still say they’re kisses.” He held Evie on his hip and rubbed his nose over her cheek until she giggled. “I love that sound.”

Mrs. G.’s eyes sparkled. “I think you’re ready for a little one of your own.”

It wasn’t a new thing for her to say. She put a lot of pressure on her sons to settle down, get married, and give her some grandbabies. Even though she said Evie was one of hers, it wasn’t the same as a blood grandchild, and I was positive she wanted some of her own.

Usually, Leo would disagree, saying he wasn’t ready or that he hadn’t met the right girl yet. That usually placated his mom, but tonight, he didn’t say anything.

Mrs. G.’s eyes widened. “Have you met someone?”

“What? No.” He cleared his throat and let Evie down when she wiggled. “I would love to have a child.”

“You’ll meet someone.” She said it so matter-of-factly, like it was already done.

Did she have someone in mind for him? She introduced him to his last girlfriend, Bianca. I’d gone to Mass with their family over the years but never received any of the sacraments. It was another reason that I’d never be good enough for Mrs. G.’s son. I wasn’t Italian or Catholic. I hadn’t gone to college or done anything to make myself worthy of a man like Leo.

“What’s new with you, Harper?” Mrs. G. asked me, thankfully changing the subject.

I’d been thinking of ways I could gain more independence lately. “I was thinking about taking some college courses.” It wasn’t anything new. I’d perused the college catalogs for years, wishing I could go.

“I didn’t realize you wanted to go to school,” Leo said.

“I’ll probably go when Evie’s a little older.” I’d work hard to make sure she’d be able to go to college. But how would I ever have enough money without bettering myself in some way? I needed to stop leeching off the Giovannis. Maybe then Leo would see me as an independent woman.

“That’s ridiculous. Of course, you should go to school if you want to. You know I would watch Evie,” Mrs. G. said.

“You already do so much.”

Leo’s jaw tightened. “We’ll work it out. Someone can watch Evie so you can go to school.”

I smiled my thanks, but inside, I knew it was a pipe dream. I never should have voiced it out loud. The Giovannis would do anything to help me, but it was time for me to figure things out on my own.

We gathered around the table and ate the pasta and garlic bread. Everyone brought dessert, so there was a lot to choose from. I spent the evening trying to stop Evie from getting more than one. She loved Italian cookies, and Mrs. G. always slipped her some when I wasn’t looking.

When it was getting late, I gathered Evie, said my good-byes, and headed to my car like I always did. I felt lonelier when I left. These family dinners reminded me of how empty my life was. I had Evie, but that was it. I had nothing else to offer her. I wasn’t any better than my mother.

A chill ran through my body.

“Are you cold?” Leo asked, startling me.

“Oh, I didn’t know you were leaving too.”

He shrugged. “I thought I’d follow you out.”

“That’s not necessary,” I said as I opened the rear door and helped Evie into her car seat.

I closed the door and turned to face him. His hands were stuffed into the pockets of his pressed pants. The Giovannis took family dinners seriously.

His expression was sheepish. “You should go to school if that’s what you want to do.”

I started to shake my head before he finished speaking. “It’s not the right time. I have Evie to think about.”

“Aren’t you thinking about her by going? You want her to see you have a better life. Better than the one your mother gave you. You want to set an example for her. Not that you’re not doing great, but you want to show her the value of education.”

I swallowed hard because he’d gotten to the core of the issue. “It’s not the right time. I’ll still go, but maybe when she’s older.” But I’d gone through the details a million times in my head. I worked during the day and watched Evie at night. I didn’t want to give up my evenings or weekends with her.

“Have you talked to Gia about taking classes during the day? You could work some weddings to make up for the hours lost. Or work more of a flex schedule.”

I shook my head, quickly dismissing the idea, even though I’d gotten excited by the possibility. “That’s not what I agreed to when I took the job.”

Leo dipped his head. “You know Gia would help you.”

Gia hadn’t been at family dinner. She told her parents she was busy, but I knew she avoided them. Her father was forever asking Gia to return to work at the restaurant. But it was important to Gia that he saw her as an independent and successful businesswoman. I wasn’t sure that was going to happen.

“Just because she would doesn’t mean I should do it.” I appreciated the Giovannis’ help, but it was time to stand on my own.

“Why do you fight it?” Leo stepped closer and brushed a hair out of my face.

“Fight what?” I asked, my breath catching in my throat and my imagination running wild. Was this where he admitted he liked me, that he always had?

“Fight us. We want to help you. We love you.”

My shoulders fell because he was talking about his family, not himself. “And I appreciate it, but I shouldn’t rely on your family. It’s not right.”

Leo’s brow furrowed. “Who decides what’s right and what’s wrong?”

“I’ve been thinking it’s time to move out.” I wondered if the Giovannis could rent to someone else and charge more. I hated to leave the security of this place, but maybe it was time.

Leo’s nostrils flared at that. “You’re moving out?”

“Don’t you think it’s time? Evie should have a house, a backyard, and maybe even a playground.” That’s what she deserved. Whether I could afford it was another thing entirely. It was expensive to live in this area, especially if I wanted to keep her in a good school district.

“Of course she deserves that, and so do you, but can you manage it?” His tone was genuinely curious.

“I need to do some research first.” I don’t know why I’d told him before I’d figured things out. I checked on Evie in the backseat, but her head was tipped to the side, and her eyes were closed. These family gatherings wore her out.

When I straightened, Leo said, “I worry about you.”

I shook my head. “You don’t need to. Evie and I will be fine.”

He tipped his head to the side. “There’s nothing wrong with me worrying about you.”

“I don’t need you to.” But I liked it.

“Mmm,” he hummed as he moved closer to me.

“I’m not your sister.” I was positive he didn’t feel anything for me except for a misguided sense of brotherly affection.

His brow furrowed. “I know you’re not my sister.”

“The other night you said I was.” Then my face flamed with embarrassment.

He drew himself up to his full height as he considered me, and I had no idea what he was thinking. Could he see right through me? Did he know how I felt? Suddenly, I couldn’t seem to draw in a deep breath.

“If you want to move out, you should. But don’t do it because I’m overprotective. I have a feeling my mom will be heartbroken if she loses you and Evie.”

“She has you, your brothers, and Gia.” She didn’t need me.

“I don’t know what’s going on in your head, but we do consider you part of the family.”

That was sweet, and it was something I’d longed to believe deep in my soul, but if the Giovannis were my family, then Leo was off-limits.

“I’m sorry if I’ve been in your space too much lately. My parents will never forgive me if I push you away.”

“I promise you’re not.” It wasn’t him. Not really. I’d been wanting to take this step for a few years. It stemmed from guilt and shame for taking advantage of the Giovannis over the years. I was an adult. I shouldn’t be relying on them anymore.

He stepped closer, his hand cupping my jaw. “Good. Because you and Evie are important to me. Ci tengo a voi .”

“You’re important to me too.” My entire body softened at his declaration. I wanted to be someone special to him. But I wanted to be so much more. I wanted to be the woman he was attracted to, the one he couldn’t resist. I wanted him to kiss me.

For a few seconds, I thought he might lower his head and touch his lips to mine, but it was wishful thinking. “Please don’t feel like you have to move. No one in the family minds you living here. We never resented you or thought you didn’t belong.”

My eyes stung with unshed tears. “You didn’t do anything. I promise it’s not you.”

He studied me for a few seconds and then finally nodded. “Let me know if you need any help finding a place.”

I remembered he’d bought his house a couple of years ago. His mother hoped it meant he was ready to settle down and get married, but then he hadn’t dated anyone seriously since Bianca.

“You and Evie should come over. There’s this old playground in the backyard. I didn’t knock it down because it’s still in good shape.”

I’d said Evie deserved a yard and a playground, and he was offering me his. “She’d love that. Thank you.”

“There’s this old storage shed in the back too. It looks like a house. Maybe we can fix it up as her playhouse. Maybe you being there will be the motivation I need to finally fix the place up.”

My throat tightened, and before I said something I’d regret, I opened the door and got into the car.

“Good night, Harper,” Leo said as he shut the door and stepped back so I could drive away.

I was falling for him, but he saw me as a family friend, and I needed to be okay with that. No matter how much my heart wanted more.