7. Don’t Mistake Tonight For Me Liking You

7

Don’t Mistake Tonight For Me Liking You

Teal

Declan’s car smells like he does.

Like peppermint.

Soap.

Judgment.

Sinking down into the cold leather passenger seat, goosebumps prickle my skin.

I waited for him outside my dorm so my roommates wouldn’t see him pick me up. Regardless of what he said earlier, I’m not ready for them to know about us. I don’t have the energy to explain it to them. So, as far as they’re concerned, I’m playing the good daughter tonight for my mom’s sake. Wearing a ridiculously fancy dress and pretending to give a shit about one of her many charities .

If it were up to me, I would have hidden what I’m up to completely. But after a dress was unexpectedly delivered to our dorm this afternoon, I had no choice but to say something.

I told them it was from my parents, but even without a note, I knew that wasn’t true. Pinned to the hanger was a fake sunflower, and Declan is one of the few people who knows they’re my favorite. Something I confessed when I was still too young to know better than to trust Declan with any little secret.

It figures he remembers. He scrapes up every crumb so he can use it to inflict mental torture. His very presence is a game, and I’m tired of playing it.

If only his picking on me wasn’t the singular thing that gave purpose to my meaningless day. Because the more he digs his heels in, the harder he is to get out of my system, and I don’t know what to do with that.

Declan adjusts the heater when I shut the door behind me. He didn’t bother getting out to open the door for me because he isn’t a gentleman. Either that or maybe he was hoping to get a peek up my skirt while I climbed inside.

The slit that cuts up my thigh made it nearly impossible to find underwear that wouldn’t show, and the buttery purple fabric is so smooth it slips away to reveal my leg no matter how many times I try to cover myself.

“Well, don’t you look presentable?” Declan smirks, not looking directly at me, as he grips the steering wheel and pulls away from the curb .

I brush my palms down the shimmery lavender dress, unsure what to make of his comment. It’s almost nice . As if anything Declan says can be considered that.

My hands rest on my thighs, and I feel the heat of my palms through the dress. The fabric is so thin I might as well be wearing nothing to shield me from the crisp chill of the night.

It’s a beautiful dress; I’ll give Declan that. Even if it is a symbol of how he’s just like my father. Dressing me up to meet whatever expectations he has for a girl at his side.

“Is the stereo broken or something?” I ask, fidgeting in the silence.

“No.”

I glance over at him. “Then why not turn it on?”

“Am I making you nervous, Teal?”

Yes . “No.”

He smirks like he sees through every little lie I tell.

“So what are we doing exactly?” I let my gaze drift out the window so I don’t have to stare at him.

“Driving.”

“I’m talking about tonight, asshole.” I grind my teeth. “This is a show for people, so don’t mistake tonight for me liking you.”

“I wouldn’t dare, pet.”

I glare at him. “Stop calling me that.”

“Why?” He shrugs, relaxing in his seat and not taking his eyes off the road. “It’s what you are. And what you’ll continue to be if you know what’s good for you. That is, unless you prefer that I call you my good girl ? ”

“You’re the worst.” I cross my arms over my chest, trying not to acknowledge the flutter that kicked up with those two words. “Let’s just get tonight over with.”

“As you wish.” He smirks, glancing at my dress.

Declan’s gaze pauses at the dip of fabric between my unimpressive breasts, and I hate that his attention has my insides burning up.

We’re silent the rest of the way to my parents’ house, and my heart lodges in my throat when the gates slowly swing open. It’s nearly impossible to breathe or swallow.

This is it. The moment of truth.

I glance over at Declan, knowing the moment I step inside with the enemy, I’m throwing my body on a grenade. It might save me from my father’s immediate plans to marry me off to Jase, but there’s no surviving the damage it will do.

Declan pulls his car to the top of the long driveway and climbs out, handing the keys to one of the valets. Unlike when he picked me up, this time, he circles the car to open my door for me, holding out his hand to help me out.

The moment I’m standing, he pulls me to him.

“Well, aren’t you good at pretending to be a gentleman when needed?”

If there’s anything more dangerous than Declan Pierce when he’s walking around like the king on campus, it’s him wearing a perfectly tailored suit, pretending to be a gentleman .

“I’m well versed in all sorts of things.” He snakes his hand around my lower back. “Maybe if you’re a good girl tonight, you’ll find out.”

“Stop with the good girl comments.”

“Don’t like it, pet?” He rubs a circle on my lower back, taunting me.

“I don’t like anything about you, Declan.” I back up a step. “No perks, remember? I’d rather jump off the roof.”

Amusement lights his eyes at my comment. But instead of it pushing him away like I hope it will, he tugs me closer.

“If you’re that intent on breaking yourself into a million pieces, Teal, at least let me do the honors of ruining you.”

I narrow my eyes, looking up at him. And I believe he means it, so I don’t say anything back. This is all a game to him. One he enjoys playing way too much.

This close, I can’t escape the woodsy, warm scent of his cologne. I can’t avoid the heat of his body or the chill of his stare.

As much as I despise Declan, I’ve always been transfixed by his icy eyes. Eyes shouldn’t be allowed to be that intense. They’re bright and gray and borderline iridescent. And this close, I spot rivers of blue running through them. Faint slivers of color that thread through and draw me in.

It’s distracting, and when he nudges me forward, my body can’t help but obey him.

Declan keeps me close to his side as we make our way up the steps, and as we do, a shiver runs down my spine. He must notice because he flattens his palm on my back and rubs it.

I expected him to whisper evil nothings in my ear all night long; instead, he’s holding me to him. I’m glued to his side, and the way his touch is gentle almost feels protective. It’s confusing, to say the least.

Declan has been my enemy for my entire life. My bully. My least favorite person. Yet, somehow tonight, there’s security in walking through these doors beside him.

He’s the devil I know, I guess.

The foyer of my parents’ house is packed with people. They spill into the three separate living rooms, filling every inch. The moment we step inside, Declan transforms into the beast his father created. Smiling, engaging in small talk, and putting on a show like he’s good at.

He’s the opposite of me.

While crowds like this draw Declan out, they make me want to crawl into my shell. Which is why I instinctively grab Declan tighter as he guides me through the mass of people.

If he notices, he doesn’t say anything. He barely even looks at me. But he doesn’t let me go either. Holding me at the waist or slipping his pinkie around mine.

And while I’ve never liked these events, having Declan at my side draws everyone’s attention off me. Compared to him, I’m unimportant and not worth paying attention to.

“Champagne.” A waiter holds out a tray, and Declan takes one.

“A water for Teal. ”

The waiter nods, and I scowl at Declan. “You’re the only one allowed to drink?”

“Last I checked, I’m the only one of us who is twenty-one.” He takes a sip. “But besides that, we both know why you can’t drink.”

Declan narrows his eyes, and even if I know I’m not supposed to mix alcohol with my medication, I hate that he has that ammunition to use against me.

Rolling my shoulders back, I snatch the water glass from the waiter as he circles back around.

“Worried I won’t hold my tongue?” I jut my chin up at Declan as the waiter disappears. “Or are you afraid I’ll accidentally overdose?”

I lift the water to take a sip, but it splashes on my lips when Declan grabs my arm and pulls me to a quiet corner. His eyes burn with anger, and I don’t know where it came from.

“New rule…” He cages me against the wall. “You’re going to stop doing that.”

“Doing what?”

Declan grips my chin, forcing me to face him. “Constantly threatening me with how you’re going to kill yourself.”

“They’re just jokes.” Kind of.

His grip tightens. “Well, it’s not fucking funny.”

“Why not?” I tip my chin up in defiance. “I figured, if anything, you’d like the thought of me making your life easier. As you so clearly point out on a daily basis, I don’t matter . So, who cares what happens to me? ”

Declan’s square jaw tenses, and all amusement drains from his expression. He’s never sweet or nice when it comes to me, but for the first time, I sense untethered rage radiating from him.

“I never said you don’t matter.” His tone is ice cold. “Not once. Don’t put words in my mouth.”

“Why are you so defensive all of a sudden?”

“Why are you so anxious to always off yourself?” His body tenses. “You’re so fucking lost in your own head you’re blind to everything outside of it. You can’t even see what’s right in front of you.”

“What’s there to see?”

Declan releases my jaw, but he doesn’t back up, and for the first time, I see something I didn’t think he was capable of—worry.

My chest tightens as the room slowly closes in. And Declan refuses me oxygen, standing over me and taking my breath away.

“Teal?” my father’s voice cuts through the moment, breaking us apart.

Declan steps back, and my lungs fill with air.

I always thought I could read Declan, but right now, I can’t decipher the darkness in his eyes. And when he finally breaks my stare, it’s like he snaps the trance I was lost in.

“Paul,” Declan says, reminding me of my father’s presence.

His gray hair is swept back, showing off the sheet of wrinkles on his forehead as he looks between us .

My father is the kind of man who overtakes a room with his confidence. His suit bleeds money, and his arrogance is written all over his face. But right now, I’m seeing something he rarely shows in public: a flash of irritation as his attention moves from me to Declan.

“Declan.” My father nods. “I didn’t know Ian would be here tonight.”

“He’s not.” Declan pulls me to his side, wrapping his arm around my shoulders. “I’m here with my girlfriend.”

“You’re—” My father’s face blanches.

His eyes widen, and for the first time in my life, he’s stunned by something. Something he quickly buries as he slams his mouth shut and straightens his spine.

Even standing up at his full height, he’s a few inches shorter than Declan, but his rage fills the room. It reaches to the ceiling and filters out of every vent. My father processes what Declan said, and even if he’s composed, his hands ball into fists, giving him away.

“What kind of game do you and your father think you’re playing?” My dad’s eyes narrow. “You’re not dating my daughter. Ian knows—”

He cuts himself off before finishing that sentence. He doesn’t know Mom already told me about his plans for me and Jase, and with the wrench Declan has thrown in it, he won’t show his hand.

“What does he know?” Declan smirks, taunting him.

“Nothing.” My dad grinds his teeth. “I don’t know what you’re up to, but you will end this. Tealene— ”

“Isn’t yours to command right now, Paul.” Declan holds me at his side. “Unless you’d like to bring this up with Sigma House.”

My father’s gaze darts between us. “Ian can’t do this.”

“My father isn’t doing anything. Ask your daughter.”

My dad steps toward us. “You expect me to believe this just happened ?”

“I don’t care what you believe.” Declan rubs his thumb in circles on my hip, and it’s strangely comforting when nothing about this situation is. “It is what it is, and if you’re smart, you’ll respect it.”

The Pierces and Donovans have always been in a silent war with each other, but I’ve never witnessed the full brunt of it until this moment. And to my surprise, it’s not Ian facing off with my father like I always anticipated. It’s Declan.

My father turns his attention to me. “You’re not dating him.”

“Why not?” I play dumb, planting my hand on Declan’s hard stomach.

It tenses at my touch, and I really wish I didn’t notice.

“Is something wrong?” I play along.

I shouldn’t be this good at pretending to be a stupid damsel, but that’s what my father made me. He locked me away and medicated me. He conditioned me to do whatever it takes for self-preservation. And right now, that requires handing myself over to Declan.

Declan’s mouth tilts in amusement as he watches me. My father might be too arrogant and narcissistic to see through my act, but Declan isn’t .

“No, nothing’s wrong,” Declan says, brushing my cheek with the back of his knuckles.

It’s soft. Gentle. I almost let myself believe in us for a split second.

“Can we speak for a moment?” My father steps toward us again, eyeing Declan. “Privately.”

Only then does Declan release me from my trance. He breaks contact for the first time since we walked into my parents’ house, hooking his pinkie through mine for a split second before breaking away.

Sipping my water, I pretend not to listen as they whisper angrily at each other a few feet away. It’s not difficult, given the number of people in the room. Glasses clatter, and crystal chimes as a group of people cheers.

I scratch the back of my neck, and suddenly, I itch all over. It’s so quiet in here that it’s loud. A hundred voices all melt together. A door hinge squeaks nearby as a waiter exits the kitchen.

A woman chews loudly, and through every other sound, that’s all I can hear. Her teeth grinding together with every bite. Food mashing in a rhythmic crunch that sends a shiver up my spine.

I try to face away from her, but it doesn’t work. I still hear it.

“Fuck.” I slam my water glass down on the table beside me, and I’m surprised it doesn’t shatter.

Water splashes out onto my dress.

The people around me glance over, including Declan, who has turned his body to watch me while my father continues talking .

This is why I avoid crowds. They’re too loud and unpredictable.

I’m too unpredictable .

A few people smirk as they watch me, whispering to each other. But no one asks if I’m okay or offers help as I brush water off my silk dress. They’re too busy talking about me to actually care.

Nearby, two men standing at the bar are talking loud enough for me to hear them.

“Even a Pierce can’t cure that kind of crazy.” The man chuckles, and his friend nods his head. “A thousand bucks says Ian paid his son to show up with her just to get back at Donovan.”

They chuckle, and the room starts to spin.

I’m crazy.

I’m empty.

I’m insignificant.

I should be used to people talking like I’m not here—Lord knows my mind isn’t. But something about how the two men glance over at me cuts straight through my chest.

Taking a step back, I look over at Declan. But he’s no longer watching me or my father. Instead, his stare is set on the two men talking about me while my father continues to lecture him.

I want to run or scream. But the second I move, Declan walks away from my father and catches me.

“What are you doing?” I ask when he grabs my jaw and tips my face up.

“Proving a point. ”

Declan’s lips meet mine, and time stops.

He hands me the lie of us, and I feed on it. He offers me the mask to hide behind, and I accept it. One hand wraps around my lower back while the other grazes my jaw, and I give Declan all my darkness. My fears. My pain.

My lips part, and I ignore my instincts.

I block out the voices in my head telling me this is just a way for him to piss off my dad even more.

Wrapping my arms up over his shoulders, I do what I’m good at.

I pretend.