Chapter 4

"I thought you needed your rest," Brianna says through the phone.

"I do. But I couldn't sleep, and when I got down here, Dave was already here."

"Please try to get along," she says. "We don't need a repeat of Glasgow and London."

I look over at Dave, who's nursing a cognac. "We're good, Bree. Nothing like having your life flash before your eyes to make you realize that petty differences are…well…petty."

"Yeah, for sure. Is Dave okay?"

"He's holding up. How's Maddie?"

"She's kind of getting into herself too much, if that makes sense."

"Meaning…"

She pauses. "It's like… She's going back to feeling like the odd man out. So I gave her a good-natured lecture about how we lived through what could have been a tragedy. She'll come around. She's just feeling like Dave and she might not be anything."

I rise and take a few steps away from the table, out of Dave's earshot. "Do I need to say something to him?"

"Oh God, no. She'd be horrified."

I look back at the table. "Good, because Dave's pretty shaken up. I think he was being strong for Maddie, and now he's letting down a bit. I'm thinking I should call Brock to come down and talk to him."

"Don't do that. Rory needs him. She looked traumatized, and she needs to recuperate to sing."

"I know. But Dave's kind of a mess."

"You want me to come down? He and I are close. Not like he and Brock are, but all of us are close. Like siblings more than cousins."

"No. You stay with Maddie. I don't want her alone."

"I understand." She sighs. "I love you, Jesse. So much. We're going to make this work between us, with our careers and everything. That brush with death made me realize I don't want a life without you."

I smile. Brianna is like the sun coming out from a storm. "It showed me the same thing. We'll figure it out. I love you too. Night, Bree."

When I hear her phone click off, I return to Dave. He's gripping his lowball with white knuckles, and for a moment, I expect it to shatter.

"Ease up," I say to him.

"Is Brianna doing okay?"

"She's good." I frown. "I mean, as good as can be expected. She fell asleep for a minute and kind of relived it."

He swallows. "That's why I'm not in bed. I don't want to be alone with my thoughts."

Before I think better of it, I say, "You want to stay in my room? There are two beds because originally I was rooming with Dragon."

He shakes his head, staring at his drink. "No."

I can't blame him. He and I aren't friends. He's a lot younger than I am, and he's sleeping with my sister, for God's sake.

Still, I made my peace with Brock and—sort of—with Donny.

"Okay, but the offer stands if you change your mind." I take a sip of my drink, swallow, and then yawn.

I'm on edge, but I'm also exhausted.

A good hard fuck with Brianna would ease this tension, but I can't think solely of myself after our near-death experience. I have to think of my sister and what she needs.

Dave finally brings his cognac to his lips and takes a drink. Then he lets out a long, low sigh. "Damn it all," he says.

"I hear you."

"I think I'm one of those people who never thought anything bad would ever happen to him, you know?"

I raise my eyebrows. I'm not sure how he expects me to reply, because that's so not me.

"But then my family's past came to light," he continues. "All those secrets my mom and dad and aunts and uncles tried to bury to protect us. Did Bree tell you all of it?"

"Most of it. She didn't tell me about Dale and Donny's past."

"Fuck." He rubs his hand over his face. "It's horrific."

I breathe in. Out. In again. Take another sip, letting the liquor coat my throat, coat my feelings.

I want to know, yet I also don't want to know.

"She says it's not her story to tell," I say, "and I agree with her."

"Then I'll keep it to myself," he says.

I nod.

"After all that shit came out, and I was forced to realize the Steels weren't fucking charmed, I needed a break. That's why I came here to join you guys on the tour."

"Yeah, I know that."

"Right. I figured it would be the vacation I desired. A respite. See Europe. Hang with Brock and Bree." He shakes his head, sighing. "But you know the biggest lesson in all of this? In my family's secrets? And then tonight's event? It's not to get complacent, Jesse. Not to think you've got the world by the balls. Because you don't. You just don't."

I'm not sure what to say to that. So I say nothing at first, until?—

"I grew up resenting the hell out of you guys."

He chuckles, but it's a nervous chuckle. "I know that. I don't think you were alone."

"I'm sure I wasn't. I think I felt it more than most though because of the thing with Donny and me in high school."

"Don is the first to admit that if he'd been on that committee, he wouldn't have been able to choose between the two of you for MVP."

I nod. "Honestly, I agree. Would've been tough. Tough call."

"But you were the quarterback," Dave says.

I nod. "True, but the quarterback isn't always the most valuable player."

"But you were. You and Donny both."

"Who the fuck cares at this point?" And I realize I mean those words with all my heart. Nothing like almost crashing into the English Channel to get your priorities in order.

"Damn, Jesse, you're right about that. When you look death in the face, you realize that nothing really fucking matters. I played football too, and so did Brock. Neither one of us was anything like Donny was, though. The only one who came close was Brock's brother Brad. He was a damned fine player, but he wasn't scholarship material like you and Donny were."

"Donny didn't take a scholarship," I say.

"He didn't. And they offered him the moon."

My heart drops slightly. "Was it because of me? Because he knew I was taking the scholarship to Wyoming, and he didn't want to be in competition with me anymore?"

He shrugs. "You'd have to ask him. He would've done great in Wyoming. But if you want my take, I also think he had his sights set on things other than football. He's always wanted to be a lawyer, so he chose to head to a bigger city to make that happen. He ended up on a partnership track at a major Denver law firm but gave it up to come work in Snow Creek, take his mother's place as city attorney."

I nod once more. I've heard the story. "So they're close?"

"From what I can see, Donny is closer to Aunt Jade than any of her other three children, including the two that actually came from her body. She and Donny have that mother-son thing going. He's such a mama's boy." Dave chuckles.

"Callie says the same thing. I hope it doesn't cause a problem in their marriage."

Dave shakes his head. "No. I've watched Donny go through women since he entered puberty, and I've never seen him as devoted to someone as he is to Callie."

I grit my teeth slightly. "He damned well better be."

"He is. And Brock is the same with Rory. Honestly, Donny and Brock are the best men I know, Jesse. Your sisters are lucky."

I pause for a moment, considering his words. Once I got over the fact that my sisters were both in love with Steel men, I did think they were lucky. But the reason I thought they were lucky is because they'll soon have access to the Steel fortune, and neither will ever want for anything again. My sisters are awesome people, and they deserve that.

It never dawned on me that they might be getting good men in the bargain as well.

"You don't agree?" Dave asks.

"Why would you say that?"

He smirks. "Just the look on your face."

I draw a breath, take another sip of my drink. "I was just thinking about something."

"Anything you want to share?"

"Not really. But I will ask you one thing."

"Shoot," he says.

"I've watched two of my sisters fall for Steels, and I think my youngest one may be well on her way. Do you have feelings for her?"

"Fuck…" He downs the rest of his cognac.

"That's not a real good sign, Simpson."

"No. I mean, it's not a sign at all." He taps his fingers on the empty glass and looks away. "I didn't come here looking for love. I didn't come here looking to sleep with your sister. I came here looking for a fucking vacation. A break from it all. And of course having sex with a gorgeous woman always makes a vacation better."

This time I'm holding the lowball glass with white knuckles. "And…?"

He presses his lips together. "And…I'm still not looking for love. But I'll admit that tonight's events have me thinking about things."

"And is Maddie one of those things?"

"To be honest, yeah. Your sister's beautiful. All three of them are, but Maddie has a…warmth."

"You don't think my other two sisters are warm people?"

He rolls his eyes. "For Christ's sake, Pike. That's not what I mean, and you know it. All three of your sisters are beautiful, smart, and talented. But I've always seen something in Maddie. Something I'm not sure others see."

"And what is that?" I say through my clenched jaw.

"She's a little quieter than the other two. Quieter than my foursome of cousins who she's always hanging out with. She's the most like Angie, so I was surprised that she and Brianna came on this trip together."

"Well, there's a story behind that."

"I figured there was."

"Apparently, your cousin has been in love with me from afar for years."

Dave's jaw drops. "Say what?"

"Yeah, scared the shit out of me when I found out. Especially when I developed real feelings for her. She's so young."

"Same age as Maddie," Dave says.

"I know. She's so young, too." I finally let go of my glass and signal to the waiter. "Can I get another?"

"Deux, s'il vous pla?t," Dave says. Then to me, "That's about all the French I know."

The waiter nods. Good thing everyone speaks English here.

"It's more than I know," I tell him.

"So you and Bree…" he nudges.

"I can't explain it," I say. "And I feel weird talking to you about it. Guys don't talk about this kind of thing. At least I don't."

"Don't I know it." He exhales sharply through his nose. "But I'll say one thing about Maddie and me—because you're her brother."

I lift my eyebrows.

"I didn't intend for anything to happen with your sister. I thought we would enjoy each other's company while we were here on the trip. She and I talked about it, and I thought we had an understanding."

"Is there more coming, or do I have to kick your ass?"

He chuckles dryly. "You've already tried that, Pike. But yeah, there's more coming." He crumples his cocktail napkin in his fist. "That drop on the plane has me freaked out. Like I said. I've been complacent. You know, when your life is good for so long, and then chaos erupts."

"That's kind of the way of the world, Simpson."

"Right, I get that." He frowns. "But it's never been the way of my world. I never had any worries. About the only bad thing that happened to us before we found out about our family's past was when Aunt Ruby had breast cancer. But they caught it early, and she made a complete recovery. It was like the sun was always shining on us, you know?"

I can't help gritting my teeth slightly. "Oh yeah. I know."

"And now," he continues, "Uncle Talon gets shot, this bitch Wendy Madigan shows up and wreaks havoc, and I find out she's been running a human trafficking ring on our property. It's like some kind of floodgate has opened and we're all struggling to keep above water."

"You guys still have it pretty good," I say.

He casts his eyes to the floor. "Don't think I've forgotten that. We weren't raised to be spoiled brats, Jesse. We were raised to understand our good lot in life, to appreciate hard work and the value of a dollar. But when you never have to worry about anything, well…"

"You kind of forget all of that," I finish for him.

"You knew where I was headed."

The waiter comes with our drinks and sets them down.

"Merci beaucoup," Dave says.

"Oui, messieurs."

I take a sip of my brandy… Or is it cognac? Whatever it is, I take a sip.

"So," Dave says, "I'm not sure I can continue this thing with your sister."

I drop my jaw. "Excuse me?"

His words should have me jubilant, ecstatic. One less thing to worry about—one less Steel in my sisters' pants.

But I fear Maddie will be crushed, and this trip is supposed to be fun for her.

"And why exactly?" I finally ask when he doesn't reply.

He takes a deep breath and sighs. "I'm not sure I know who I am anymore, Pike. When you see your life flash before your eyes, when you realize you haven't done much of anything except be a spoiled rich boy who beds every woman he can, it makes you think."