Chapter 11

Damn the man! She hated him! She really truly hated him! How dare he and her brother build an enclosure so Lucky would be comfortable and happy? How dare Lucian build this amazing clinic—and it was amazing—for her and tell her whatever she wanted all she had to do was ask? But they both knew that wasn't true. Zenya wanted to be free. She wanted to go back to her home and the life she had started building on the Outer Banks. More than that, she wanted for Lucian to have never found her.

She was on her own. There was no way for her to contact anyone who could help her. No way to contact anyone at all without Lucian knowing about it. He was acting like some kind of feudal lord, and she was a mere pawn for him to move around the chessboard. She shook her head. That wasn't true. Oh, he might be acting like some medieval king, but she did believe that he believed she was his fated mate. The fact that she didn't want to be didn't seem to be something that he concerned himself with.

Zenya hated him. She needed to keep reminding herself of that. She stifled a cry, biting her fist to keep herself from screaming aloud. Pheromones and fairytales. That's all it was. She would be damned if she gave into either.

The feel of his lips on hers, the sensual pleasure of his tongue tangling with hers—it was hormones, nothing more, nothing less. But it had felt like so much more. Had he sensed how much she wanted him? Could he feel the tightness of her nipples and the swirling desire that was pooling between her thighs? God, she hoped not, but she feared he could. He could have pressed his advantage, because she wasn't sure she would have had the will to fight him.

There was no denying she'd wanted him. None—not to him, not to her. She wanted him with every fiber of her being. Her roommates had teased her about still being a virgin at her age, but she'd laughed them off. For one thing, she had thought Lucian's men would have been given orders to ensure no man ever touched her. That he hadn't told them that was immaterial. The fact remained that if anyone had even tried, they would have been persuaded to never do it again.

To know he could walk away without a second thought after turning her world upside down with a single kiss just wasn't fair. She wanted him in ways she didn't even completely understand. He could turn her steely resolve to liquid mercury with a simple sound—a purr, a growl, or a chuckle. The way his chuckle seemed to roll down the link she would never acknowledge existed was something she was certain she would miss for the rest of her life.

She took a deep breath and admitted, if only this one time, if only to herself, that there would never be another man for her. Once she was free, she would miss him for the rest of her life, but she was unwilling to sacrifice her freedom and who she was just to have him hold her close… to finally feel what he'd been making her feel in her dreams for a long, long time.

She looked around at this clinic that was every veterinarian's dream. She knew it was just another weapon in the arsenal he was bringing to bear in order to bring her to heel. It was the dream for every vet but her. For Zenya it was a nightmare: the realization of all she could have if she was just willing to become what everyone wanted—the alpha's mate. But she wasn't willing to do that. She had told herself time and time again that she wanted to carve out her own life.

Zenya hated that her body had responded so eagerly to his. All he'd done, for heaven's sake, was kiss her and run his hand over her ass, so that her body was pressed to his and she could feel the size and power of his erection. She knew she should have put up more of a fight, but she hadn't. Instead, she had given over to her lust and longing.

She wasn't sure if he'd pulled her back in his arms or hadn't walked away that she wouldn't have given in to him. She told herself it would just be for that one time. To know, finally and irrevocably, what it meant to be possessed by Lucian. After that single time, she told herself, she would find a way to escape him, but she knew that was a lie. Last night had taken every bit of willpower she possessed not to leave the room adjoining his and seek the comfort of his arms in a bed he"d made no secret that he meant to share with her.

She shook herself, trying to find some semblance of calm. Oh, for heaven's sake, Zenya, it was just a kiss. She locked the clinic door, leaving a note that there was a wild bobcat loose and to please knock. Then she began to make her way through the clinic, making notes of things that would be needed to make the clinic fully functional. She didn't plan to be here, but she at least wanted things to be set up for whoever Lucian put in charge after she was gone.

As she walked, Lucky alternated between hopping up on the couch in her office to nap and following her around. When he rubbed up against her legs, she reached down to stroke his soft fur and he purred contentedly.

"I think Lucian might be right. I think given a choice, you'd much prefer to be a pampered house cat. I can't say that I blame you; it's a beautiful house. Do you know I was born there? My sire was a bastard of the first order, and Lucian killed him to take over the clan. I have to admit, he's done right by his people. It's even more beautiful than I remember it."

She was glad Lucky seemed to be settling in. Perhaps he'd be all right if she left him here. She couldn't very well go unnoticed if she had a bobcat as a pet. She would need to start over… again. Even the thought was daunting. How had he found her? The only thing she could think of was her license. Damn, all that hard work and she'd most likely never practice veterinary medicine again. Maybe she could find some small hamlet where they wouldn't care about a license. Or maybe she could go to a large city and work as a vet tech or vet assistant.

Maybe she could go abroad. No. That would require a passport and a lot more money and identification documents than she was likely to be able to acquire. There was another thing she'd have to figure out—identification paperwork. She knew part of what the Shadow Sisters had done and how they'd done it, but she didn't have the contacts to do it for herself. She wondered if anyone at Ice Storm was one of the Shadow Sisters or could act as a go-between. Didn't she hear someone at the safehouse say something about Annie Campbell being a contact? Zenya wondered if she might be able to reach out to her. She shook her head. She had no desire to place any of these women in danger.

Could she make it back to the safehouse? Did she even remember how to get there? Did she remember any of the numbers from the burner phone the Shadow Sisters had given her? The whole thing seemed daunting to the point of overwhelming. She was on the verge of tears when there was a knock on the door. She headed out into the waiting room and saw Zaiden standing on the other side.

Taking a deep breath, she opened the door and carefully let Zaiden in. Watching Lucky sitting on the couch, licking his paw and rubbing his face, she wasn't really sure she needed to be all that careful.

"What do you want, Zaiden?" she said with a sigh.

"I'm tempted to say I want to see you happy, but then you would point out I would need to help you leave Lucian, which we both know I'm not willing to do. That in turn would lead to an argument. So how about I ask if you've seen the enclosure for Lucky up at the house?"

She could tell he was trying. Part of her wanted her brother back. But he wasn't just her brother; he was Lucian's beta, and she was willing to bet his loyalty to Lucian was unshakeable.

"It looked really good. You asked about flooring, probably vinyl planking like here in the clinic would be good for the inside and maybe one of those big fluffy dog beds. He seems to like soft and cozy. As for the outside, grass would be great, but not practical. I don't like the idea of artificial turf, so maybe just the bare cement. A raised bed out there would be nice, as would something for him to climb on. If there was a drain and everything slanted down slightly, it would be easy to keep clean."

"That's very doable. I wondered about something for him to climb on might be a good idea?"

"Probably."

"Okay. I figure the two of you will be down here most of the time during the day, so maybe I could make the outside enclosure down here bigger and more elaborate."

"Why this building? Why did you pick it for the clinic?"

"I didn't," said Zaiden with a smile. "Lucian did. He knew it used to be the place you hid from our sire when he was alive, and afterwards, it was your secret place. He thought it probably had more good memories than bad. It's close to the main house and fairly central so it made sense."

"The two of you know I won't be swayed by some fancy veterinary clinic set up, right? I'm making a list of what else would be needed to make this place state-of-the-art. Someone else…"

Zaiden put his hand on his sister's forearm. "There will be no one else. This is your clinic."

Zenya removed his hand. "I won't be here."

Angered, Zaiden grabbed her wrist. "You will. You need to accept that. Lucian has bent over backwards trying to make this as easy for you as he could, and all you do is snarl at him. I doubt there is a tigress at Ice Storm that would turn him away."

"Then maybe you'd best tell him to look their way," Zenya said, jerking her arm away. "I don't want him."

"Bullshit. You're fated mates. Every time you say his name, your pupils dilate. You're as wild for him as he is for you."

"I am not," she protested, perhaps a little too vehemently.

"Again, I say bullshit. And let's not even talk about the fact that he hasn't opted to punish you in any way for eluding me in San Francisco. I have to admit, I still don't know how you did it."

"Nor will you ever. Ask yourself this, Zaiden—if I'm his fated mate, why do I keep running away from him every chance I get? Why did I turn my back on my home and a brother I once loved to keep from being forced into his bed?"

"Because you've always gotten your way. After Lucian killed Zion, he wouldn't let anyone rein you in. He let you grow up wild and strong and what does he get for that? Your disdain." Zaiden stopped and stepped back. "Zenya, I don't want to fight with you. I don't want us to be at odds."

"Then be my brother and not his beta. Get me a burner cell phone. Better yet, get me a burner cell phone, some camping equipment, and warm clothes. Take him to meet with the Resistance. By the time you get back, I'll be long gone and neither of you will ever see me again."

"I can't do that."

"No, you won't do that," she accused.

"That too. Ask yourself this. Do you really think that if I didn't believe you were his fated mate that I would help him? That I wouldn't do everything in my power to see that you got what you say you wanted?"

Zenya said nothing and turned her back on him. She had forgotten how close she and Zaiden had once been and how he'd always been able to read her better than anyone. Well, anyone other than Lucian.

"I'll tell you what. I'll make a deal with you."

"What's that?" she asked, not turning around.

"If you can convince me that you genuinely do not have feelings for Lucian and can manage to keep your hands off of him and stay out of his bed, I'll leave it alone. I'll even speak to Lucian on your behalf. If he doesn't agree to let you go or let you live here in peace, I'll get you what you need, but not so you can hike out of here. I'll find a way to get you in touch with the Shadow Sisters and I'll help them get you out."

"He'll kill you."

"Maybe, but maybe I'm right, and you'll see Lucian's feelings for you are real and that you are truly his fated mate."

"And if I can't convince you or I end up in his bed?"

"Then you'll quit with all this nonsense, admit he was right all along, and allow him to claim you so that you become what has always been your destiny—first lady of the Baihu clan."

Zenya turned around and extended her hand. "Deal. But if you don't hold up your end of the bargain, I will let your precious alpha know you were willing to betray him."

Zaiden took her hand and shook it. "You have yourself a bargain, little sister. A bargain I hope you lose in spectacular fashion. If you don't believe anything else, believe that I have always loved you."

She released his hand. "I think you love me as much as you can. Unfortunately for me, it wasn't enough not to deliver me into the hands of my enemy."

Zaiden shook his head. "I would never betray either of you. The two of you belong together. I've known it almost as long as Lucian has."

"Then you are both wrong."

Zaiden glanced at his watch. "They should be getting ready to serve lunch. How about you put a lead on that thing, and we head back to the house. We can grab a big dog bed from the storehouse, and you can let him start exploring his new play space. They should have the chain-link fencing finished this afternoon. We can add the drain and have it ready to go tomorrow."

Not trusting her voice, Zenya merely nodded. Probably best to make them both start thinking she was becoming the meek and submissive mate that Lucian wanted. She would bide her time letting her brother think that she believed him and was going along with his plan. She didn't and she wouldn't. She would be long gone before they realized the truth.