17. Blair

"Where are you taking me?"

"I told you, it's a surprise."

"What if I want to know?" Raven asks.

Hordes of people wearing black and red are pouring out of the metro.

"Can you not guess?"

Darkness has already settled over Milan. Streetlights line the roads leading up to the stadium like a beacon drawing everyone in.

"Soccer match?"

"I believe they call it football here."

"Smart-ass." Raven smirks at me.

"Football. Soccer. Call it whatever you want. This is how we're spending the night."

Our tickets get scanned before I link hands with Raven and wander off to find our seats.

"What makes you think I'll have an issue with how we're spending the night?"

"Are you a soccer fan?"

"Blair, please. It's called football."

"Now who's being a smart-ass…" I lean in for a quick peck.

"Mmm. I don't care how we spend our night as long as I'm spending it with you."

"Careful what you wish for."

I grab two beers from a vendor before strolling through the stadium. The energy around us is palpable.

Soccer fans here are intense on a good day, and I was lucky to find tickets for the game tonight.

With a break coming up soon, I was worried I'd miss them.

Thankfully we didn't. Because while we've been immersed in her world since we arrived, I want to show her a part of my world.

And this is one of the few luxuries I allow myself in my life. When everything I do is for Avi, soccer is mine.

Boos echo around us as a few visiting team fans wander through.

"Is there going to be a fight?" Raven asks, sipping on her beer.

"You worried?"

"I don't know. Should I be?"

"You'll be fine." I can't help but lean in, taking another quick kiss. I love that we can give each other affection here so freely. Now that we've given in to this thing between us, it's easy.

One of the easiest things I've ever done.

"If I tell you I'm not, can I get another kiss?" Raven asks with a grin.

I smile against her lips, loving the taste of beer on her mouth. "Is that the excuse you're going with?"

Raven closes the distance. Her mouth is warm and tantalizing. I want more. So much more.

Someone bumps me from behind, breaking the kiss.

"Can I say I don't like soccer fans?" Raven grumbles.

"C'mon." I laugh, tugging her toward our seats.

"Will you explain the rules to me?" Raven asks.

I give Raven the rundown as both teams walk out onto the field. Milan fans are booing as the opposing team is announced.

"Is it always this loud?" Raven winces.

What I can only assume is the national anthem of Italy starts playing. Everyone is singing passionately at the top of their lungs.

"All the matches I've been to are. At least at home."

The captains shake hands and the game starts. The energy settles as the game progresses.

"How long does it take for someone to score?" Raven's beer is mostly gone as we edge closer to halftime.

"It might not be until extra time."

"And that's…"

"Ninety minutes plus whatever is allowed for stoppage."

Raven's eyes widen. Her cheeks are pink from the cool night air. "Are we going to have to wait that long for them to score?"

"Maybe." I shrug a shoulder.

"And you like this?"

I turn a huge smile on her. "Of course. It's a rush when they score. I love it."

As if on cue, the striker for Milan puts the ball past the goalkeeper, and the crowd goes wild.

"Holy shit!" We both cheer, jumping up with the rest of the fans.

"That was amazing!" Raven is just as happy as I am, even though we have no ties to this team.

Everyone exudes joy as the team piles on top of each other on one end of the field.

"Is it always like that?" Raven nods to where they are.

"Sweaty guys jumping on top of each other?"

"Yeah." Raven loops an arm around my waist, pulling me in close. "You think the women teams do that too when they score?"

I turn, and her face is right there. I drag my nose along her jaw before nipping at her ear. "You sound like you like that idea."

"What if I do?"

I growl as play resumes. "I don't."

"You don't?"

Raven drops into her seat and I follow. "No." I lean closer, not wanting to be overheard, even though it's unlikely given all the exuberant noise ringing through the stadium. "Because I want to be the only sweaty body on top of yours."

Her fingers dig into my knees. Even through the fabric of my jeans, I can feel the sting of her sharp nails. "How can you say that when we have another hour of the game to sit through?"

More like two hours by the time we get back, but I don't tell her that.

"I promise, I'll make it worth your while."

"You better." She squeezes my knee before leaning closer to me.

Wrapping an arm around her, I keep her where she is.

This is what I've missed. With Avi being my entire life, I haven't had the chance to date. I miss a woman's touch. The touch of their lips on mine. The way it feels when they hold me.

It's even better because it's Raven. The attraction that I feel at each touch, each gaze, is something I've never felt before.

God, even out here in the middle of a crowd of thousands, I love feeling her close to me. Raven shouldn't be taking up my every thought, but she is.

With the final event speeding toward us, we'll be heading our separate ways.

"Maybe you can take me to a match at home," Raven tells me as we leave after the game. It ended with a Milan win, 1-0. We link arms as we walk back toward the metro.

"Yeah, sure."

It's wishful thinking. I want us to have more nights like this. Spending time together just the two of us. With no other ulterior motive.

But come this time next week, we'll each go our separate ways. I don't have time in my life with worrying about Avi. She is my entire life. Everything I do is for her. I can't make space for Raven.

It's nice to dream for a little while. That this could be our life.

I blow out a breath as we cram onto the train, wrapping my arms around Raven's waist to hold on tight.

Raven's face is soft as she holds on to the overhead strap.

I'd give anything if this could be our life together…

Anything.