11. Ivy

11

ivy

I couldn’t stop thinking about when Teddy’s reindeer nuzzled the carrot out of my hand. Never mind the way he’d come barreling through the trees on the back of Buddy to find me.

Trying to escape out the window might not have been my smartest plan.

Not that I was going to complain to Teddy because I’d stolen one of his cable-knit sweaters. It smelled faintly of pine trees and spice, though I was trying not to inhale too deeply. I didn’t want him to catch me smelling his clothes. No matter if it calmed my senses or not, there was just something about Teddy that drove me crazy.

I hated that he was right. Cookie would be an adorable name for a reindeer.

I’d always loved animals with food names, even if I’d never had a pet of my own. That dream had never quite gone away, even if I’d given up on so many others in my life.

Rudolph had always been my favorite Christmas movie growing up like some part of me had related to him. Because no matter how hard I’d tried to fit in with the other kids and to make friends, I’d never quite felt like I did.

Maybe one day, I’d have that dream. The big house, all warm and cozy inside, with a little puppy curled up in a basket. A home. Someone who loved me and would never leave me. Maybe I was just destined never to find my place. My person.

Sitting in the North Pole Diner, I took a swig of the hot chocolate that had been placed in front of me by our waitress, Scarlett. God, it smelled delicious: rich and sweet, everything I loved in a cup.

She’d given me a warm smile when we sat down in the booth. I’d caught a glimpse of ears just like mine—long and pointed at the ends—when she walked away after taking our orders.

“Wow. That’s good,” I said, swiping my tongue over my upper lip to catch some of the whipped cream.

“Best hot cocoa in the entire North Pole,” he agreed.

I hummed in response. “This place is unreal.” And damn, I wanted to hate this place. But how could I?

“Just wait until you see everything else we have here.” He flashed me a confident grin. “You’re gonna love it.”

I already did.

The storefronts were all painted in various bright colors, decked out in holiday trimmings, and the bakery was painted like a giant gingerbread house, just like at Christmasland. Seriously, the whole thing looked edible. I desperately wanted to go inside. I also spotted a bookstore, a store that looked like it sold ice skates and skis, and a clothing boutique.

“It looks like we just stepped out onto the set of a Christmas movie,” I repeated my earlier thought in a daze.

“It’s great, isn’t it?” He grinned. “Come on, admit that you like it.”

And honestly—it was great. I loved Christmas. This place was amazing. That didn’t mean I wanted to give him the satisfaction of being right.

“Is this where they got the inspiration for Christmasland?” I raised an eyebrow, looking out the window.

“Probably. Though the park was all my grandpa’s idea.”

“Wow.” I was still looking out the window. “And everyone who lives here is… an elf? Genuinely?”

He let out a sigh. “You still don’t believe me.”

“I don’t know what I believe.” I rubbed my forehead. “The entire foundation of my life just changed. I’m just processing.”

“When will you accept the fact that maybe I’m telling the truth? That I didn’t lie to you, sweetheart?”

“But you did,” I whispered. “Why didn’t you tell me the truth about who you were before?”

“Would you have believed me if I did?” Teddy said, his voice soft. There was a sad tone to it like he’d told someone before, and they hadn’t.

So many things made sense now.

Even so, it hurt. Knowing all those days getting to know him, and it wasn’t even the real him. I knew him now, though. This man sitting in front of me—Teddy Claus—this was the real him.

“Maybe not,” I said, matching his tone. “But now we’ll never know, huh?”

Our food came, interrupting our conversation.

“Thanks, Scarlett,” Teddy said, nodding to our waitress.

“Sure thing, Teddy.” She gave him a bright smile, the pointy tips of her ears sticking out of her hair as she turned to the side. Just like mine. “How’s everything going at the workshop?”

The workshop? Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me. I dug into my cheeseburger and fries, pretending like I wasn’t interested in their conversation .

“Oh, you know. Business as usual this time of year. Dad kept nagging me about taking a break from everything, but he doesn’t have much room to talk.”

She laughed. “Tell him to come visit sometime soon.”

“Sure thing.”

Our waitress left, and I shoved another fry in my mouth, studying him.

“Do you want to see the workshop?” he asked, voice softer than I expected, like he was trying not to spook a wild animal. Whatever I’d expected him to say, it wasn’t that. “That’s where all the magic happens.”

Something twisted in my gut. Had I overreacted earlier? I didn’t think I had. Part of me was still trying to wrap my head around all of it: how I had supposedly come from here. That the mother I had never known grew up here.

As much as I wanted to keep being difficult to Teddy, especially since he had lied to me, I couldn’t because this place was amazing .

“That depends. Does that also include meeting your parents?”

He nodded. “Probably.”

“Your father,” I stated. “Santa Claus.”

My eyes connected with Teddy’s, and he gave me a small smile. I wondered if he had any idea how handsome he was when he did that. It lit up his entire face, making his eyes almost sparkle like lights on a tree.

Oh. Wow . Okay. I could do this, right? I pushed my hair back behind my ears—a reminder that they were, in fact, still pointy on the ends—and squared my shoulders. “I’d love that, Teddy.” It wasn’t hard to put a smile on my face, considering I’d just pet a reindeer and was about to see Santa’s workshop.

Santa’s. Freaking. Workshop.

If I was dreaming, I wasn’t sure I wanted to wake up .

He cleared his throat. “Shall we then?”

I nodded, burying the bottom half of my face in my borrowed jacket and Teddy’s scarf.

No matter how attractive I found him, I needed to stop thinking about him that way. Needed to stop thinking about all the ways my life could be different.

That wasn’t what this was. He’d offered for me to come home with him for Christmas so that I could experience it. Not because we were in a relationship. After the holidays were over, I would go back to Florida, and I’d be alone. Same as always.

But would it hurt to have a little fun while I was here? I bit my lip, watching his back as we headed back out into the cold, trudging through the snow.

Earlier, I hadn’t taken the time to appreciate it before, but outside was… amazing. As far as I could see, the world was covered in a blanket of white. I spun in a circle, taking it all in.

Breathing out, I watched as a puff of air formed in front of me. “Cool,” I murmured to myself. When I looked up, I found Teddy watching me, an amused expression on his face. “I told you I’d never seen snow before,” I said, voice quiet. “Not the real kind. We make fake snow for the amusement park, but… it’s not the same.” I reached down and scooped up a handful of snow. “It’s softer than I imagined.” The snow was cold on my bare hands, melting from whatever body heat I still had.

Teddy laughed, the sound making my inside feel warm despite the outside temperature.

“What?” I asked, giving him a little scowl. I didn’t need him to find my actions fascinating or for him to watch my every move.

He cleared his throat. “Nothing. You ready for this?”

“Uh-huh,” I responded, brushing the snow off my hands .

We walked in a comfortable silence towards the workshop, and I wondered if Teddy was as lost in his own thoughts as I was in mine.

Longing unfurled inside of me. It was easier to pretend I didn’t feel that pull of desire when I denied the things I wanted, but looking them in the face, seeing other people living a life I could only dream of… It picked at that wounded part of my soul.

Stopping in front of a large, multi-story building was trimmed in bright lights and painted red, my jaw dropped open. “Is that…”

Teddy nodded, stepping up behind me. “The big building is the factory. My dad’s workshop is over to the left—” He pointed at the smaller, quaint looking log-cabin building set off to the side.

Teddy turned his body towards mine, staring down at me with that chiseled jawline and sharp cheekbones.

There was something almost magnetic about his presence. Something that kept drawing me to him, even when I knew I should have been running the other way. He was undeniably gorgeous, but there was something about the spark of delight in his deep green eyes that I couldn’t look away from.

He offered me a hesitant smile. “Welcome to the North Pole, Ivy.”

“This is the original workshop. Or so they say.”

“Really?” I wondered how many of the movies had gotten the tale of Santa Claus right and how many had just been pure speculation based on tales of sightings or legends of old.

“Yeah.” He nodded. “Back when they built this place, it was the only structure around. We don’t make toys in here anymore, but… well, you’ll see.”

A rush of anticipation went through me. This was my catnip . I had seven thousand questions simmering under the surface, waiting to be unleashed. Could he tell that I was endlessly captivated? I hoped not. Because I still needed to remember that I was mad at him, even if the reasons were slipping away from me.

He opened the room, and we stepped inside, the warmth hitting me like a blast. I might have needed the coat outside, but in here, the fire was roaring. I shrugged it off, leaving my winter clothes on the coat rack by the door.

Surveying the space, I took in the enormous fireplace, and how everything was decked out in Christmas decor. Garlands, lights, and tinsel covered almost every inch of this place.

“ Woah .”

“This is nothing,” Teddy murmured. “You should see my parents’ house.”

“Who does all of this?” I asked, eyes still wide. Looking around, I noticed a hallway that must have led to the other rooms. If this was no longer the workshop and wasn’t where his parents lived, what was it?

“The elves,” he said, offering no further explanation. “Come on, I want you to meet someone.” He held out his hand, guiding me further into the sitting room.

My jaw dropped. Because sitting in front of the fireplace, wearing a knit Christmas sweater and eating a sugar cookie, was an older man with a long white beard.

Holy shit. I blinked a few times. “ Santa ?”

“Hello there, little Ivy.”

My throat was tight. I’d always believed in Christmas magic, and maybe some part of me had always hoped he’d been real. But to be here, to be standing in the middle of the North Pole, standing in front of Santa Claus… I opened my mouth, but no words came out.

Teddy gave me a small smile. “Ivy, I’d like you to meet my dad, Nicholas Claus. Dad, this is Ivy Winters.”

“You’re real?” I blurted out, not sure if I was asking a question or stating a fact.

He chuckled. “Of course I am. And I’ve been watching over you all these years.”

Teddy looked at his dad in surprise, but if his lack of knowledge of that should have surprised me, I didn’t know.

“Sorry. I think I need a minute.” I sat on the couch, looking at Teddy and his father. His father, Santa Claus. Which meant all of this was real, wasn’t it? Because how could I see all of this, the man sitting in front of me, and not believe it to be true?

Even I wasn’t that jaded.

“You really were telling me the truth,” I murmured, rubbing my temples.

“Told you that you shouldn’t doubt me.” He leaned back against the brick of the fireplace. “I have no reason to lie to you, Ivy.”

“I can see that now.” Rubbing at my forehead, I tried to comprehend everything I knew to be true. Everything had changed in just a matter of hours. “I just… why me? Why bring me here?”

His dad stood up from his chair, moving over to stand in front of the couch I sat on. “May I?” He asked, waving at the cushion next to me. I nodded.

“Ivy, I know life hasn’t been easy for you.” Teddy’s father took my hand in his, squeezing lightly. “I wish I had all the answers for you. That I could turn back the clock and keep you from heartbreak.” His lips turn down, and I can see the sadness in his eyes.

My eyes filled with tears. Because as much as I wanted to put on a brave face and insist that I was fine, it had been hard. “But you can’t,” I murmured, knowing my words were barely audible. That Teddy was standing here.

“No.” He ran his fingers over his beard as if deep in thought. “But you are here now.”

“Why?” I asked again, sucking in a ragged breath that I hoped didn’t sound like a sob. Why couldn’t you have found me sooner? It was the question at the forefront of my mind, but somehow, I couldn’t bear asking it.

“Why does anything happen the way it does?” He tilted his head as if considering me. “I do not have answers to the way events unfold.” Santa shook his head. “I cannot see what will come to pass. That does not mean that the future cannot be different. Perhaps everything had to happen exactly the way it has so that we could end up here now.” He looked at his son, something unspoken passing between them.

“But all that he sees you when you’re sleeping, he knows when you’re awake, he knows when you’ve been bad or good… It’s true, isn’t it? You’ve been watching me?”

He nodded. “There is more to it than that, but it is true I watch over the children of the world. As for your background… I am afraid I didn’t know the truth until recently.”

I should have felt relief, but disappointment lingered. “Oh.”

“I’m sorry that we failed you.”

The words hit me straight in the heart. I’d never really known my parents. But if my mom had been from here, and her family had taken me in… This could have been my home. “All these years…” I shook my head. Home had never been something I’d considered.

“And now?”

What now? That was the question—a big one. “I don’t know,” I admitted. “It doesn’t feel like I understand much of anything anymore. ”

“But, with time, you will learn many things, my dear Ivy,” he said, his voice full of hope. Those sparkling eyes that danced with something akin to amusement captured mine. Teddy’s father seemed delighted that I was here. He looked at his son. “Things we have all forgotten around here.”

A thousand emotions warred within me.

What was it I really wanted?

We left the cabin, though we didn’t walk back to Teddy’s house. Instead, there was a sleigh out front, with Buddy hooked up to the reins.

When had he had time to do this? We’d left his reindeer in the stable, and he hadn’t left the room once.

I shook my head, hiding my small smile. Magic ? Had he gone through the effort for me? Between all the events of the day, I was exhausted and glad not to walk back to his place on foot. Teddy helped me onto the bench before getting us on our way.

“Does your dad always speak in riddles like that?” I asked, biting my lower lip as I inhaled the clean, crisp air, watching the scenery pass us.

He chuckled. “I think he thinks he’s wise.”

I wrinkled my nose. “And what do you think?”

A laugh left Teddy’s lips. “That I’m glad I have many years before he expects me to take over for him.”

I peeked up at him, keeping the lower half of my face nestled into my coat for warmth. “And you want that? To… take up the mantle?” I assumed that meant that one day, he would be Santa Claus.

“Of course. It’s all I’ve ever wanted.” He looked at me with a strange expression. “I’ve been learning all I can about my family’s company so I can run it all one day.”

Teddy would stay here. Of course he would. This place, the North Pole… it was his home. But no matter what his father thought, it wasn’t mine.

Did I belong here? I didn’t have an answer. What had started as an excuse to experience a white Christmas for the first time was quickly becoming something very different.

The sleigh continued through the snowy terrain, neither one of us seeming to have the right words.

“It’s already dark out,” I observed, wanting to break the awkward silence. The sun had set while we were inside, yet the way was lit thanks to the lights that adorned practically every structure around.

“Yeah.” Teddy nodded. “It gets dark pretty quickly here in the winter.”

“And where exactly is here? Because the actual North Pole is in the middle of the Arctic Ocean, and you can’t honestly tell me this entire place is floating on a polar ice cap?”

He laughed. “ No . But where, exactly, I can’t tell you.”

“Why not?” I crossed my arms over my chest.

“It’s a secret. And you haven’t proven yourself trustworthy yet.”

I clicked my tongue on the roof of my mouth. “Need I remind you that you basically kidnapped me?”

“Semantics, really.”

“ Teddy .”

“Ivy.” He stared at me, his face practically inches away from mine, and I had to remind myself why I shouldn’t lean in. Why kissing him was a bad idea.

Even though at this moment, there was nothing I wanted more. Just a breath closer, and…

“We’re here.” Teddy jolted away from me, hopping out of the sleigh faster than a bolt of lightning .

“Oh.” I followed him out of the sleigh, stumbling slightly and catching my foot on the lip of the frame, sending me tumbling out into the snow.

Strong arms caught me, heaving me upright. “Are you okay?”

“Fine.” Just my injured pride, but I could deal with that. I turned away, heat rising to my face and ears.

What was wrong with me?

“Are you hungry?” Teddy asked as he closed the door behind us in his cozy cabin.

Earlier, I hadn’t appreciated just how small it was. It was set out, further away from town, like he didn’t want anyone to bother him here. But it was obvious it was lived in, too. Photos hung on the walls: him growing up with his parents, wearing a cap and gown at his graduation. Memories of a life lived. If you looked in my apartment, you’d see none of that—just a blank slate waiting to be written on.

I frowned at the wall.

“Ivy?”

“Huh?”

“I asked if you wanted dinner.”

“Oh.” I nodded. Despite just having eaten at the diner a few hours ago, I was already hungry again. “That sounds great, actually.”

“Alright. I’ll whip something up.”

“You can cook?”

“Why do you sound so surprised?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. You just don’t…” I raised an eyebrow at his form instead of fi nishing my thought.

“Don’t look like I can cook?” He placed his hand over his heart. “You wound me, Poison Ivy.”

Sliding on to a barstool at the counter, I let my head rest in my hands. “I guess I just didn’t expect all this.”

Everything felt so… domestic. I’d never been treated like this by a man in my life. Maybe it was the bare minimum, or I’d just been with a lot of red flags, but I wasn’t used to it.

As he rummaged through the kitchen cabinets, pulling out pans and various cooking utensils, I couldn’t help but think about his plea earlier. Maybe he was just as lonely as I was.

Maybe this could be something good for both of us. Because as much as he drove me crazy—and he did—I had to admit he wasn’t all bad. Even from behind, his well-defined muscles bulged through his shirt. His forearms, now properly on display after he pushed his sleeves up, made my mouth water.

Especially as the scent in the room turned into the most mouthwatering smell of my life. Clearly, he wasn’t lying about saying he could cook.

“Okay,” I said to his back, trying to ignore the ache between my thighs. How long had it been? Too long, really. Especially with this magnificent specimen of a man standing in front of me. Not that I was going to suggest anything of the sort.

No, I had other ulterior motives for what I was about to say. What I was going to suggest.

“Okay, what?” He turned around, facing me fully.

I took a deep breath, wondering why the hell I was saying this. “This is all crazy. And I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I believe you.”

His face lit up, those forest green eyes twinkling with satisfaction. “I told you, sweetheart.” And, okay, I wouldn’t look into that too closely; why he wanted me to trust him so badly or why he seemed so excited that I’d admitted he was right.

“When you asked me to come home with you, I didn’t expect all of this. The North Pole, the magic… finding out I’m not who I thought I was.”

Teddy nodded, pausing only to flip the meat in the pan. “I know. I’m sorry for not telling you the truth sooner.”

“But I still want to have the perfect Christmas.”

He blinked at me a few times like he didn’t understand my meaning. Or maybe he’d never considered that he’d give me anything but.

My cheeks warmed, and I could feel the heat all the way to the tips of my ears. “I’ve never gotten to experience what it was like. A white Christmas. With snow and presents and cookies and…” I trailed off. A family . I’d never had a Christmas where I was surrounded by people who loved me.

“Okay.” He pasted on a big, dopey smile. “A perfect Christmas. We can do that.”

Leaving the food simmering and effectively ignoring his current mission in favor of our new one, he moved over to his desk. Rustling through the drawers, Teddy pulled out a leather-bound journal and flipped it open to an empty page, tearing it from the book.

“What are we talking?” His gaze bore into mine as if he was searching my face for some deeper meaning. “We’ll make a list.”

“Oh. Um.” I hadn’t really thought this far ahead. “I guess we should do the normal things, right? Bake Christmas cookies. Decorate a tree. Take a sleigh ride at night.” I closed my eyes, picturing it. Taking a romantic sleigh ride was something they did in all the Christmas movies, right?

He hummed in response, his hand moving across the paper. “What else? ”

“I don’t know. I’m not exactly the expert on Christmas here.”

“Ivy. You’ve literally worked at Christmasland for what, seven years?”

“Well, sure… But I’d also drink hot chocolate and turn my apartment thermostat down to the sixties to trick my body into thinking it was actually cold outside. I don’t have experience with these sorts of things.” The joys of being an orphan.

“But there has to be other things you’ve always wanted to do. Come on. Hit me.”

I bit my lip. “I mean… I guess I’ve always wanted to do all that traditional family stuff.” The words were barely more than a whisper. “You know, matching pajamas and stockings and all that.” Shrugging, I tried to appear more casual than I felt. I’d always loved Christmas. And this was shaping up to be my best idea yet.

He took my ideas and added to them, too. Once we were done, our list was complete.

Teddy and Ivy’s Christmas Checklist

1. Bake Christmas Cookies

2. Decorate A Christmas Tree

3. Take a Sleigh Ride

4. Drink Hot Chocolate While Watching a Christmas Movie

5. Build a Snowman

6. Make a Gingerbread House

7. Go Ice Skating

8. Visit The Christmas Market

9. Ugly Christmas Sweater Party

10. Hang Stocking s

11. Matching Christmas PJs

12. Buy and Wrap Presents

13. See the Lights

The list stared back at me in Teddy’s handsome script. Damn him—why did even his writing have to look nice? He was all man, and I definitely should not have been drooling over him. Not when he’d been so sincere all day. So patient and kind and?—

Letting me sleep in his bed with no expectations.

“Perfect,” I whispered, not wanting to break this moment. It felt like we weren’t fighting for the first time, and I didn’t know what to do with that. Since we’d met, our relationship hadn’t been exactly steady. It felt like we were always either flirting or fighting.

When he walked away to finish the food that was cooking, I added one more to the list.

14. Kiss Under the Mistletoe.

Maybe it was wishful thinking. Maybe I’d just imagined the heat between us.

But maybe, just maybe… He felt it, too.