Three Days Later

"H ow are you doing with all this?" Lydia asked.

"I've been better. And I think I've been way worse, too," Eliza replied and took a sip of her beer.

"We didn't really talk about it yet… What happened to make you remember, exactly? You said something triggered the memory, but how would looking at some old stamps or whatever he was collecting back then do that?"

And here it was, the reason she'd been avoiding this conversation with Lydia. Everyone else had just believed her when Eliza had told them that she'd seen an old box of her dad's stuff that had somehow given her a clearer image of his killer, but Lydia had always seen right through her. Even when they'd first met in high school, Lydia could tell when Eliza was lying or not telling her the whole truth. One look, and Lydia usually knew. It had been one of the reasons Eliza had stopped their visits during their freshman year of college: she'd known that if Lydia saw her, she'd figure out that something was going on with her and ask her about it.

This was different, though. Eliza planned on telling her best friend what had actually happened in that storage room, but she wanted to get some answers first. She wanted to find the man who had killed her father, and she wanted him to talk to her and tell her why he'd done it. She wanted to find out what her father and this man had been hiding and if it had anything to do with this boomerang device that someone wanted to keep away from the world but couldn't figure out how to destroy.

She wasn't sure how much danger, if any, she was in for using it in the first place, and she didn't know if telling someone else about it would put them in danger, either. What she did know was that she'd never do anything to risk hurting Lydia, despite needing someone to talk to about what had happened to her and how she'd really been able to identify this man that the police were currently looking for to question him about the crime.

"El?" Lydia pressed as they sat on Eliza's sofa, turned toward one another after finishing a dinner of Chinese food that Eliza had ordered for them .

"I can't tell you."

"You can't tell me? I saw you throw up outside, and you were so pale and looked like you'd seen a ghost. You also wouldn't let me go in and see that storage unit. You actively stopped me, and I've been trying to figure out why this whole time. Any picture or some old shirt or whatever wouldn't be something you'd need to keep from me, so I have no idea what's going on, and we tell each other everything. We always have."

Eliza swallowed and said, "That's not entirely true."

"Well, okay, maybe not everything . We don't really talk about our sex lives or sometimes lack thereof with each other, but we used to date, so that makes sense to me. Everything else, though, we always talk about. I guess you didn't tell me about going back to therapy and that being one of the reasons we ended, but I can understand that, too." Lydia paused then, trying to examine her face. "Something's up, and you're not telling me. Did you at least talk to your mom about it the other day?"

"No," she replied. "I have to find some things out first before I tell anyone. If I tell anyone, I mean."

" If ? Are you waiting until they find this guy?"

"Yes. I need him to tell me why he did it."

"What if he doesn't tell you?"

"I think he will."

"Why?" Lydia asked. "He'd have no reason to confess. He's gotten away with it for this long. Even if you could say for certain that he was the man who killed your dad, there's literally no other evidence. There were no prints. There was no DNA. They couldn't trace the knife he'd used."

"I know all of that, Lydia."

Eliza stood and picked up one of the to-go containers to take to the kitchen more to have something to do than anything else, but Lydia, unfortunately, followed her into the kitchen with more questions.

"So, why would he confess when he could probably still get away with it?"

"Do you want to just stay here tonight? It's late."

"Don't change the subject. What is going on with you?"

Eliza slammed the carton down on the counter, and pieces of Kung Pao chicken flew around it.

"Hey, what is wrong with you?" Lydia asked .

"You really want to know?"

"Yes, I do."

"Fine. Come on," Eliza replied and pulled on Lydia's hand, dragging the woman up the stairs. "Stand there." She pointed to a random spot in front of her bed, went into the closet, removed the pile of clothes on top of the metal box, and carried the damn thing out into the bedroom. "It was this. This is what did it."

"A metal box?" Lydia asked, confused. "Was it special to you or your dad?"

"No, I'd never seen it before that day in the storage unit." Eliza sat on the bed and opened the box. "There's a note in here too, but this is what did it." She held up the device.

"What the hell is that?"

"I have no idea. The note calls it the device , but I don't know what that means." She held it up but didn't let Lydia touch it and made sure she didn't press that button again.

"Okay. Then, why did this make you remember?"

"It didn't. It made me relive it."

Her best friend looked at her, even more confused now, and said, "I don't get it, El."

"I accidentally pressed this button, Lydia. And you're not going to believe this next part, but when I did, I wasn't in the storage room anymore; I was back there . It was that night outside the cabin. I was how I am now, an adult, and wearing the clothes I was wearing the day we went to my mom's place to get this stuff. I saw my teenage self. I saw my mom how she was that night. And I also saw my dad and the man who killed him. I tried to stop it, and when I couldn't, I heard their conversation."

"What conversation?"

"My dad and the guy. They were talking about something. My dad told him that my mom and I knew nothing. The man asked him where something was, and I think it's this. I think he wanted this ."

"But you were transported somewhere? Are you sure you didn't have a nightmare or something?"

"I was wide awake, Lydia."

"It happens. It can happen, right?"

"I don't know how this thing works. I just know what it did. I saw that man's face, and I remembered him from the wake. That's how I know, okay? I know I sound like I belong in a straitjacket, but it's the truth. And I ran out of that room and threw up because that man ate our food. He stood there, in a room of people who knew and loved my father, and he just pretended like he wasn't the reason we were all there in the first place."

"Maybe we should just take a minute here," Lydia suggested as she sat down next to Eliza.

"See? This is why I didn't tell you. I'm not making this up, Lydia."

"I didn't say you were. But it does sound kind of crazy, Eliza."

"You really think I don't know that? I put this thing in my closet under a pile of clean clothes because I don't want anyone to find it, but I don't want to get rid of it, either, because I don't know whether I'll need it again or not."

"Why would you need it again?"

"Because maybe I can go back and see something else that'll help them convict him when they find him. Maybe they missed something, but I'll see him run off, and he left a glove behind that we can go there and find today."

"It's been sixteen years, El."

"I'm just giving an example."

"Have you pressed the button again?"

"No, I'm too afraid. I thought I'd do it if I had to, but I don't know that I should just use it again. The note warns against it."

"The note. Can I read it?"

"Lydia, it said people died for this thing or from this thing. I don't want to bring you into this."

"I'm your best friend, El. You go, I go. Right?" Lydia smiled shyly.

"No, not right. I don't ever want anything to happen to you. Why do you think I pushed you away all those years ago? I want you safe always."

"Hey, I'm never going to leave you, so your logic back then still makes no sense. You needed to work through some things, and I get that, but Eliza, I've loved you since I was fifteen years old. If you're involved in something crazy, I'm right there by your side."

Eliza stared at her then and said, "‘Friends Forever' was on our bracelets."

"Yeah. Right," Lydia replied, but there was something in her look that told Eliza that she hadn't meant the kind of friendship love with her words.

"Lydia, I–"

"El, we– "

They started saying it at the same time, but Eliza would never know what Lydia was going to say because the device had been on the bed between them, and when Lydia moved to turn to Eliza more fully, she'd brushed it with her hand, and then, she was gone. Lydia had disappeared. Eliza blinked her eyes rapidly. She looked around the room. She stood up and ran out of her bedroom, down the stairs, and around her entire house, both inside and outside, but Lydia wasn't there. Eliza ran back upstairs, understanding now that when she'd been transported by the device earlier, she must have literally disappeared from where she'd been in the storage room. This time, though, Lydia was the one triggering the device, so she must have gone somewhere else, too.

Eliza's heart was racing. Had she done something to get her friend lost in time somewhere? Was Lydia dead? Would she come back? If so, when?

Eliza decided to sit next to the device and wait, careful not to press the button or even move the thing in case it needed to remain perfectly still. She remembered that the day they'd gone to the storage unit, Lydia had told her that she'd been gone a little more than an hour, so that meant Eliza had probably been gone a little less than that. Maybe Lydia would be gone for the same amount of time. Maybe it would be longer. Either way, all Eliza could do was wait, so she just sat there and watched the clock on the cable box under her TV as the minutes ticked by.

Fifty-six minutes later, Lydia reappeared, but not in an instant flash. She reappeared as if she'd been beamed down from a spaceship, as if she was rematerializing.

"Oh, my God! Are you okay? Lydia, are you okay?"

Eliza moved the device out of the way then, setting it back in the metal box on the floor, before she refocused on Lydia and gripped the woman's shoulders to check and make sure that she was really there.

"I get it now," Lydia said softly.

"Are you okay? What happened? Where did you go?"

"You broke up with her for me ," Lydia added.

"What? What are you talking about?"

"Melanie."

"What about her?"

"She asked you to move in with her."

Eliza froze for a moment. She hadn't told Lydia about that conversation with her ex-girlfriend .

"Yes," she offered finally.

"You said no."

"Yes."

"She said she loved you and asked you if she could move in with you because it had been seven months, her lease was up, and you owned this place. You two were sitting on the couch downstairs. She was holding your hand. You were wearing blue."

"You went back to that ? You weren't even there. Why would it take you back to me breaking up with my girlfriend?"

"Eliza, you told her that you couldn't love her because you loved someone else."

"Oh."

"She asked you who."

"And I told her it was you. She got angry because I'd led her on, and she was right to be angry about that. Then, she left, and–"

"You cried. Why did you cry if you didn't love her?" Lydia asked.

"Because I've loved you since we were fifteen years old, but I've let one thing or another get in the way of telling you ever since. First, I was dealing with my grief. Then, I didn't know I liked girls yet. After that, we were together, but I was dealing with my issues again, and I broke your heart, Lydia." Her eyes welled with tears. "I didn't think I deserved you after that. I've dated, yeah, but no woman has ever held a candle to you. You're the one I've always wanted. But I want you to be happy, and I don't think I can be happy."

"What? Why not?"

"Because one night, I saw my dad get murdered right in front of my eyes, and I couldn't do anything to help him. I ran back inside that house, and he was outside, dying. I've hated myself for not being able to tell them who did this because I was right there. It was just so dark. I couldn't see until this thing showed me who he was. Now, all I want are answers."

"What if you don't get them, El? Are you going to live your whole life without love because you don't have them?"

"I don't know."

"Eliza, I'm sitting right here. I've been here this whole time. You know that no woman has ever meant to me what you mean to me. They can't. It's just not possible. I've been in love with you since we met, Eliza. And I'll always be in love with you. Can't you see that?"

"I have no right to hurt you again. "

"Then, don't fucking hurt me," Lydia replied, moving to kneel in front of Eliza. "I don't have any idea what just happened to me. All I know is that I watched you cry, balled up in the fetal position, and you said things to yourself, El. You kept saying over and over that you don't deserve me. But that's not true. You've always deserved me. This thing that happened to you and your family is tragic, but you've watched your mother turn into a zombie. Is that what you want for yourself?"

"God, no," she said quickly.

"Then, stop trying to make relationships happen with other women you don't love and be with the one you do love. Be with me, El. I love you. I've been here loving you, trying to show you."

"You've dated, too, Lydia. I wanted you to be happy with one of those women."

"I dated because, for years, I thought there was no chance for us. But I started to feel that shift recently, and I stopped. No more dates for me unless they're with you." Lydia rubbed her hands up and down Eliza's legs. "We'll figure this thing out, okay? Whatever is happening, we'll figure it out. We'll find this guy. He'll go to prison, and we'll get answers, but please, let's just do this together because I am miserable without you, babe. God, I've been miserable without you since I was nineteen years old. And you've been here, too, being miserable this whole time because you think you don't deserve me. El, you deserve everything good. And I want to be the one who gives it to you, if I can."

"I don't want to end up like my mother," Eliza told her, letting a few tears fall.

"Then, don't." Lydia smiled at her and added, "I love you. You're the only one for me. You always have been."

"I love you, too," Eliza replied.

Lydia stood, pulled Eliza up by the hands, and they just stared at one another for a minute as if neither of them knew what to do now. They hadn't kissed in more than a decade. And they'd both changed a lot since then, but they'd always come back to one another, even if it was just as friends. Eliza knew that she had to be the one to do this now. She needed to reassure Lydia that this was happening. So, she leaned in, pressed her forehead to her best friend's forehead, and inhaled deeply.

"Are we really doing this?" Lydia whispered.

Eliza answered that question by pressing her lips to Lydia's over and over again until Lydia opened to her, and they were kissing slowly and deeply. Her arms moved around Lydia's neck. Lydia's were around her back and under Eliza's shirt, palms pressing to heated skin. Both of them moaned. Eliza wasn't sure if she'd moaned first or if it had been Lydia, but she gripped the back collar of the T-shirt that Lydia was wearing with both hands, needing to hold on to something because this was what she'd been missing, and it was the thing she never thought she could have again.

It had been so long since they'd last kissed. Eliza knew they should talk more first. She'd been building walls around herself brick by brick from the moment her father died. She had at least a three-layer fortress with a damn moat around her, and no woman had ever been able to break through. She supposed that was probably because she never gave them the time or the opportunity, but there was one person in her life who had been able to slowly knock the walls down. She did it not with a wrecking ball but with a fine touch, slowly pulling down one brick at a time, and when another, new one appeared, she just kept it there and focused on the older bricks that were more ready to be tossed into that moat until finally, Eliza was standing in her own bedroom, kissing her and pulling at her shirt until it was on the floor.

As Lydia's lips shifted to her neck, Eliza was having a hard time focusing on the fact that just an hour earlier, she'd watched her best friend disappear in front of her eyes after a device they knew nothing about had transported her to a moment in time that Lydia hadn't witnessed for herself and couldn't have known the details of. Prior to today, even if Eliza hadn't been able to convince herself that the device was really doing these things and it wasn't just her imagination, she could now. She knew she hadn't heard the conversation between the man called Albert and her father in reality, but now, she was more than certain. She just didn't understand why the device would take her back to a murder and Lydia back to a little over a month ago when Eliza had broken up with a girlfriend who had wanted more from her than Eliza had been able to give.

When Lydia pulled Eliza's shirt off and stood there, staring at Eliza's breasts still covered in her bra, Eliza knew that she needed to be fully present here, in this moment. She cleared her mind, finding it surprisingly easy to do so now as she took in Lydia's dark eyes aimed at her chest and focused only on how good it felt to finally be doing this again with the woman she'd always loved. She kissed Lydia then and turned them around so that Lydia was backed up against the bed.

"Yeah? You're sure?" Lydia checked. "A lot has happened today. We can–"

"I'm sure. Are you?" Eliza asked back.

"I've been sure since I was a teenager, El. We only ended things back then because it seemed like you needed that, and I couldn't lose you as my friend. I can't lose now, either, so if you think this is just the emotions of everything happening right now, tell me because we should stop."

In response, Eliza smiled at her and removed her own bra, letting it fall to the floor. Then, she lowered the sweats that she'd been wearing to hang out with her best friend and took her underwear with them as well because she wanted the woman she loved to see her and touch her. She reached for Lydia's jeans next and undid them before she pushed them down. Lydia kicked them off the rest of the way and was now standing in only her underwear and mismatched bra, looking perfect.

"Oh, baby," Lydia let out as she looked Eliza up and down.

She hadn't called her ‘baby' since they were nineteen, and Eliza couldn't help but close her eyes, remembering how good it had always felt. When she opened them a second later, Lydia's bra was gone, and she was sliding her underwear down her legs until they were gone, too, and there were no more barriers between them.

Eliza pressed herself to Lydia's body then, holding on to her. Arms around Lydia's neck. Breasts pressed together. Lydia's arms around her waist, holding on to Eliza tightly. Lydia had been wanting this, too. They'd both wanted this all along… That realization hit her like a ton of bricks, causing the guilt to return because she 'd been the one keeping them apart.

"Don't do that," Lydia requested, somehow reading the moment without even looking at her. "Don't regret. Just be here with me. Always be here with me. Nothing else matters."

"Okay," she said, holding back her tears. "I love you."

"I love you, too," Lydia replied and pulled back enough for Eliza to crawl onto the bed before she crawled on top of her, between Eliza's spread legs, and looked down at her with a smile. "I think I remember what you like. I tend to replay all those times in my mind a lot. But we're also a lot older, so if there's something else you want, tell me, okay? "

"You replay them?"

Lydia nodded.

"Me too," Eliza admitted with a soft smile. "And just touch me. I've missed you."

Lydia kissed her slowly at first, but when her hips began to roll down into Eliza, the kiss turned heated. Eliza didn't want this to be over in seconds, but she also knew that their first time back, after being apart like this for so long, was likely to be quick before they took their time with each other later. Lydia kissed her neck and moved down to her chest, between Eliza's breasts, placing soft kisses there. She moved lower still, kissing Eliza everywhere down to her belly button, but then she moved back up, and a nipple was in Lydia's mouth before Eliza even realized it. Lydia sucked and massaged her other breast, all while Eliza lay there, watching her and touching her all over her back, letting Lydia know with her touch and her sounds that she wanted this; that she was here with her.

Lydia moved to her other nipple next, and she sucked, licked, and nipped a bit at it, which was a new thing they had not done as teenagers, and it had Eliza wanting more. When they'd been together before, Eliza had loved Lydia's fingers on her clit, but she'd always, always come with her mouth. Even during their first time, which had been two teenagers figuring things out – especially Eliza because, at that point in her life, she hadn't even touched herself before – she'd come when Lydia's mouth had been on her.

"Still?"

Eliza nodded at her and gave her a smirk.

"Oh, I missed that bedroom smirk. You have no idea, El." Lydia smiled up at her as she lowered herself down Eliza's body, somehow knowing exactly what Eliza wanted without words again.

Lydia kissed her thighs, spreading her legs wider and taking in Eliza's center for the first time in years, and Eliza watched her breathe her in and close her eyes for a moment. Then, Lydia just licked her, apparently unable to wait any longer, and Eliza's hips bucked. Sex with women had been fine for her. It hadn't ever been anything to write home about, and she didn't have all that many partners in her life, but she knew there was a difference between the other women and this one. Other women had touched her, but none of them had ever made her feel how Lydia did when she just did one simple thing, causing Eliza's entire body to relax its tension without even having an orgasm .

Lydia licked her again. Then, her lips engulfed Eliza's clit, and she sucked. God, Eliza was on fire now. Her hips rose and fell, and her hand went to her own breast, massaging it and playing with her nipple. When she heard Lydia moan, she looked down at her and realized that Lydia was staring at Eliza's hand on her breast. She was getting turned on. Eliza gave her that smirk again that she hadn't used with anyone else and continued to play with her breasts, closing her eyes to just focus and feel this. She'd been numb for so much of her life, with and without the prescribed medications, but she didn't feel numb anymore. Finally, she was able to feel. And when Eliza came, it was with Lydia's name on her lips, her hips in the air, Lydia's mouth on her clit, and Lydia's fingers slipping inside, taking advantage of the angle.

She came again only minutes later, letting the rush take over her entire body as she moaned and gasped out Lydia's name once more. Lydia let her come down and then climbed back up Eliza's body and kissed her; the first time Eliza had tasted herself on her best friend's lips in more than ten years. They kissed like that for several minutes, with Lydia taking small breaks to tell Eliza that she loved her and Eliza saying the same, before Eliza rolled them over. When she did, Lydia gave her a look so soft that Eliza had this flash of receiving that look under different circumstances.

Lydia was standing next to her in front of their friends and family. Someone was presiding over the ceremony because they were getting married. Eliza smiled back at her, knowing that she could have that now, if she wanted. Well, not right this instant, obviously, but if she allowed herself to be happy, she could have that soft smile from Lydia aimed at her as they stood and professed their love in front of everyone and then walked back down that aisle as wife and wife.

"What are you thinking about right now?" Lydia asked as she ran a hand through Eliza's blonde hair.

"Just that I want to be happy with you," she replied. "I don't want to miss anything with you."

Lydia smiled even wider and nodded. Eliza kissed her and, remembering what Lydia liked, hoping it was still the same, she reached down between them and started stroking.

"Oh, God," Lydia let out.

And she was so wet. Eliza didn't remember her getting this wet when they were younger, but she loved it .

"I want you," she whispered into Lydia's ear before she sucked on it.

"I'm yours. I'm all yours, El."

Eliza slipped inside her with two fingers and placed her thumb on Lydia's clit. Then, she moved her own center over Lydia's thigh and began rocking. Lydia's eyes were closed, and her head was back. Her cheeks were flushed. The pink was creeping over her neck that was now exposed to Eliza, so she kissed it and licked up to Lydia's jaw before she kissed her hard on the lips. She grunted as she rocked harder and moved faster inside Lydia, wanting Lydia to know just how much she'd missed this.

"Come with me," Lydia ordered and grasped Eliza's ass.

Eliza wanted this moment to be just about Lydia. Still, she remembered how Lydia had always loved when they could come together the few times that had happened, so she began rocking herself harder over Lydia's thigh, trying to bring herself closer to climax to match Lydia's building orgasm.

"Fuck, baby," Lydia said. "I'm coming."

That was all it took. Hearing those words come out of Lydia's mouth had taken Eliza over the edge as well, and they were coming together. Eliza had sweat forming between her shoulder blades. She was thrusting inside Lydia harder and faster while pressing her own clit down as hard as she could against Lydia's thigh. Lydia was still holding on to her ass, helping her move forward and back over the thigh, and Eliza wasn't sure how she was able to concentrate on both her orgasm and Lydia's because her own was so powerful, she'd lost her rhythm inside Lydia. Finally, they both reached the highest point of their climax, and they just continued to touch one another slowly until they came down.

"My love," Eliza said.

"Wow… You haven't called me that in years," Lydia replied, tracing shapes over Eliza's back as Eliza lay firmly on top of her.

"I missed calling you that."

"Should I call you ‘my love' instead of ‘baby?' Is ‘baby' done now? Are people against it? I feel like it's ‘babe' more today."

"I loved you calling me that," she shared, lifting herself a bit to meet Lydia's eyes. "So, don't stop, okay?"

"I always liked that you called me your love because it's what your dad called your mom, and I know how much they loved each other. "

Eliza smiled down at her and said, "They did love each other. And I love you. I've always just… I never want to be without you again."

Lydia kissed her lips and replied, "You won't be. We're not kids anymore, Eliza. I think I let you off the hook back then, but I'm not going to do that anymore. You have to talk to me, okay? When you feel yourself pulling away, you tell me. When you need to talk through something with me or with someone else, I'm still here. You just come home to me every night, and we work through stuff together. No more apart."

Eliza nodded her agreement and asked, "Will you move in, then?"

"Move in?"

"Here," she clarified. "The guest room is really just your room because you stay over so much. I know we haven't actually been together this whole time, but we're together now. I don't want to miss anything else with you. Move in here, and let's really start this new part of our lives together. I'll come home to you every night, or you'll come home, and I'll be here."

Lydia seemed to be thinking about it, so Eliza worried that she'd gone a little too far too soon, but then, Lydia was nodding and smiling at her.

"Can I move some of my stuff into this closet instead of the guest room one?"

Eliza felt her eyes filling up with tears, but this time, they were happy ones, and she said, "Of course, you can. This is our bedroom now."

"Then, I'll move in this weekend," Lydia replied. "And we're redoing the kitchen. I can't stand that light pink on the walls."

"I didn't paint that. It was like that when I moved in," she defended.

"I know. But we're still painting it a different color that we'll pick out together."

"Whatever you want," Eliza said, meaning it.

"I want you ."

"I want you, too, my love." She leaned down and kissed Lydia once more.