Chapter 11

I wakeup alone and in my own bed. For a beat, my heart feels hollow. Until I remember how good he loved me last night.

I tense my glutes, the action squeezing my hole. It’s tender but not painful. I clench again, this time embracing the slight ache. A smile pulls at my lips.

Last night was incredible. Everything we shared, each touch and kiss, the way Bentley felt inside me, how perfectly he fit—it was fucking magic. I’m not even embarrassed that I’m gushing.

Bentley Sandford legit rocked my world.

I made the right decision, going to him like that. I’ve been battling for so long that it was the panic holding me hostage. But we can do this.

Seeing his expression was the breaking point. Though, I don’t know if it truly was one single thing.

Maybe it was the days apart without touching intimately. Maybe it was knowing he walked away from the party a few nights ago and me hating his hurt. I suspect it’s a combination.

That and being around all the couples last night, longing most definitely had punched me in the gut.

But I’m here.

After last night, I want to do this. And not just because he fucked me so good that for a moment there, I forgot my own name.

Okay, maybe it’s a little of that too.

Bentley reminds me that there’s good in the world. When he’s touching me, it’s possible to escape and feel free. While I know I can’t live with his dick up my ass—not that I couldn’t totally handle it—knowing he’s mine takes the sharp edges off life. He helps to chase away the bullshit and the darkness.

Cliché, maybe, but who gives a damn? I certainly don’t. Not if it means we can actually make this work.

Needing to see him and steal a morning kiss before anyone wakes, I scramble out of bed. I’ve got classes this morning and strength training this afternoon, so it’s going to be a busy day surrounded by people. There’s also the studying that I need to make a start on.

But first, kisses.

There’s already movement in the house, so I need to be stealthy, especially as all the guys stayed here last night. I need a pit stop to the bathroom, though.

It’s free, which is a win. I freshen up, making sure my breath is nice and minty, then leave. From the bathroom, there’s Leon’s door between me and Bentley. But that’s okay. Me going to his room is nothing new. Hell, Bentley’s my best friend, and over the past three and a half years, we’ve rarely not been attached at the hip.

I’ve got this. Nothing to see here, folks.

While I think it, I still keep my footsteps light. I pass by Leon’s door and hear quiet voices. He and Tiller are awake, which means I need to be super vigilant.

By the time my hand’s on Bentley’s door handle, my pulse is racing, and a smile is curling my lips. The wood I’m sporting isn’t ideal—not if Leon or Tiller leaves the room—but just the thought of kissing Bentley, all pretenses gone, and after what we shared, is making it impossible not to chub.

I turn the handle, grinning even wider when I find it unlocked, and step inside. Brightness fills his tidy room. Bentley’s bed is made, the curtains are open, and the man who makes my heart flip is on the bed, pulling on his socks.

His gaze snaps up, a smile fast forming when he sees my grinning face. “Morning.” He searches my expression, but I don’t let guilt crush my high.

I’m here. That’s what matters.

In three strides, I’m before him and between his legs. He clasps my waist and peers up at me. His smile stretches even farther, and his bright eyes are more green than gray this morning.

“Morning, sweetheart,” I manage before I bend down and meet his lips.

I sigh at the connection, rightness settling on my shoulders. Our mouths brush slowly, tenderly. We don’t have time to start anything deeper.

When I pull away, Bentley’s eyelids open. Pink stains his cheeks, and even though our lips only brushed for a few seconds, his are a shade darker than normal. My gaze eats him up, landing on his chin and the stubble rash.

“Should I say sorry for that?” I gently sweep my fingertips over the sensitive skin.

“No.” He shakes his head and eases me back a little with firm hands on my hips so he can stand. “Shaving rash.” He winks.

I chuckle, my heart feeling full to the point where I’m practically swooning. But processing this shift is messing with my mind. I just want to capture his mouth again, then hold his hand and walk on out of here.

The worst thing is, I could. I know he would let me. There’d be no grand announcement about our status or our sexuality. We’d just be us.

I’m the fucking idiot holding us back, which means I need to get on and suck it up.

“Are you good this morning?”

I nod, understanding what he really wants to know. That doesn’t mean I’m going to take it easy on him, and while I shouldn’t play with fire… “If I tell you I still feel you, that I’m pretty sure I’m still stretched, what?—”

His mouth is on mine, tongue probing, lips unrelenting as he kisses me. Heat licks up my skin and travels to my pulsing cock.

I hold on to him, snaking a hand under his T-shirt. The warm skin against my palm is centering but does nothing to calm me down. I want Bentley so desperately, so completely?—

The sound of thundering feet jerks us apart.

The house is officially awake and up.

Bentley groans and presses his forehead to mine. “You can’t say shit like that to me.”

I smirk, even though getting rid of this hard-on is going to be a nightmare. “So it’s not something that’ll help you get through the day?” I’m a teasing asshole at the best of times, but now that I can tease him with my actual asshole? Hell yes, I’m going to have some fun with this.

“Only if you plan to ride my cock at multiple points throughout the day.”

Fuuuuck.

Okay, that backfired. My dick pulses behind my jeans. “You’d want that?” My voice is breathy and doesn’t sound like my own.

What this man does to me.

I’m also fishing and woke up needy, apparently. I know exactly how much he wants me. Bentley has never played games with me.

“Every damn day of forever.”

My eyebrows dart high in surprise, and while pink covers every inch of visible skin on Bentley’s neck and face, he follows up with a “well, what are you going to do?” shrug.

The asshole may not play games, but he knows how to tease and make me his fucking bitch.

My admiration for the guy flares to life.

There’s no doubt Bentley lets me lead outside the bedroom, but he has the skill to unravel me impressively fast.

Talented fucker.

Another round of loud footsteps on the staircase, and our time here is done.

“Later?”

“To pick up this conversation or for me to be bur?—”

I press a kiss to his mouth to shut him up. He grins against my lips, and I pull back.

“I’ve created a fucking monster.”

Bentley snorts, pecks my lips, then swipes his Nikes off the floor.

But I’m deadly serious. Okay, only slightly serious. He’s always been bolder and louder when we’re alone, even before this started. I think it’s an only-child thing, maybe. For a kick-ass basketball player who’s in the starting five so regularly, he has plenty of attention as well as camera time, but he doesn’t lap that shit up.

Unlike me. I can showboat the hell out of the spotlight.

Honestly, no one would believe the Bentley I know exists.

My heart flutters as we head downstairs. He gives me this side of him and chose me to be the one to know the real him.

I angle back to look at him and find his attention already on me. I smile and look forward once more. Going to him last night and making the split-second decision to take something for myself is either going to be my making or my destruction.

I vote for the first one.

The kitchen is full of bodies when we arrive. This house is not big enough for eight men, six of whom are well over six feet. Somehow, we make it work.

“Morning, sexy mofos.” I grin at my friends, making my way toward the fridge to tug out the container of yogurt.

There are a few grunts and smiles around the room as everyone is fixing up their breakfast. Tyron eyes me, his gaze flashing to Bentley, who’s breaking a couple of bananas off the huge bunch sitting in the fruit bowl. When his attention moves back to me, he gives me an up-nod before he turns back to Logan and peers at something on his boyfriend’s phone.

Who the hell knows what he’s contemplating. It’s easier to let Tyron just be himself and not question everything he’s mulling over.

Having put the yogurt on the countertop, I grab a couple of bowls. Bentley moves to my side to cut up the banana, dropping the pieces inside while I scoop out the mango yogurt. He follows up with some muesli.

With our concoction created, I pass him a spoon, my focus lingering a little longer than usual. It’s an effort not to lean in and kiss the smile from his lips.

“You forgot your honey.” Bentley’s moving before he finishes speaking.

This time, it’s impossible to tear my eyes away. The honey’s at the back of the cupboard under the countertop, which means he’s bent over, peachy ass just there for the viewing.

I want to bite into it, grind against him.

When my cock twitches, I look away quickly. Getting a hard-on in the kitchen isn’t my idea of a good time.

A glance around before I drop my focus to my breakfast lets me know that no one’s paying me or Bentley any attention.

I need to be cool. Act natural. I just have no idea how to do that anymore, which is ridiculous. I’ve managed it pretty spectacularly over the past few months. So what that he’s taken my ass, finally given me what I’ve been craving but have been too fucking terrified to take.

“Here you go.” Bentley squeezes in a blob of honey, catching my gaze.

“Thanks.” I dip my head, ignoring the rush of heat in my chest at the sweet intensity in his stare.

It’s official. I’m a fucking goober. I can’t even look at the man without flushing or remembering how good he dicked me.

“I’m heading out.” Tiller cleans off his plate and dumps it into the dishwasher. “See you all later at practice.”

Leon’s on his heels as Tiller walks out, saying goodbye. We wave him off while I make quick work of my breakfast.

“Hungry?”

My attention snaps to Bentley’s. The asshole quirks his brow as I shove the last spoonful into my mouth.

“All these calories I keep burning,” I throw back.

Pink unfurls up his neck, and he clears his throat but doesn’t tear his gaze from mine.

“Aren’t you eating enough?”

Somehow, I don’t jump at Kieran’s question, but I do ask an articulate “Huh?”

His eyebrows are dipped as he looks at me, then my empty bowl. “Food. Aren’t you packing away enough calories?”

It takes me a second for my brain to come back online. If I keep burning the extra calories with intense sessions like last night, I’m definitely going to be under my intake.

Not that I’m going to tell him anything about my hopefully nightly extracurriculars.

“I’m good. Just feeling hungry this morning.”

Kieran’s in full captain mode as he eyes me. My wink has him rolling his eyes before he turns back to Dean.

“You need something else to eat?” Bentley asks quietly.

Fuck, he’s sexy, especially with concern in his expression and the way his assessing gaze roams over me.

“I’ll get an extra-big portion at lunch. I’m good.”

The look in his eyes lets me know he doesn’t believe me. I should just grab a protein drink, but those things are expensive as fuck, so I need to stick to my meal plan.

Thankfully, the rest of the guys clearing up saves me from answering. A glance at the time lets me know I need to haul ass too. Larkin, the lecturer who I have first up this morning, is a stickler for punctuality.

The household gets moving. We all have early classes today.

We tidy up, which takes no time at all, since Kieran’s trained us well over the years. Not that I don’t grumble about it sometimes, but not living in a shitheap is good.

In no time at all, we’re heading out and walking the short distance to campus. Bentley’s at my side, standing just close enough that every now and then, our shoulders rub. It doesn’t get a raised brow or a secondary glance from anyone, but my heart hammers in my chest anyway.

“Meet me in the library in a couple of hours?” he asks.

I nod without question. “Sure thing.” Yesterday, he was serious about helping me study. Thank fuck. It’s nothing new that I can struggle to sit still for long enough to properly study. Having Bentley by my side may add a layer of distraction, but he also helps rein me in. “See you in a couple of hours.”

Kieran and Dean have already kissed and said their goodbyes as they head in opposite directions. Leon’s gone to his lecture, and Tyron’s backed Logan up against a wall.

Something green and ugly forms in my gut. I look away and stare at Bentley. He’s already looking at me, his lips curled up slightly. It loosens the ball forming in my stomach.

He knows. He feels this.

“Make notes, and I’ll see you soon.” He turns to walk away.

“Bentley.”

Stopping immediately, he turns back to me.

I swallow back words I have no plan to share, even though they’re eager to fall off my tongue. But what I can do….

“Find a quiet alcove on the second floor.”

His brow shoots high.

Making out in the library is obviously something we’ve never done before. It would have been hard to pretend I’d been day drinking for that to happen.

Since I no longer need to pretend, and I’m already desperate to kiss the fuck out of him, the library sounds like an awesome idea.

“Two hours.” I back away, my steps feeling lighter, the smile on my face so fucking wide that he narrows his gaze at me. I bounce my brows before turning. I really can’t be late.

But I do catch the shaky breath Bentley releases before I haul ass to my lecture.