Chapter 34

CHAPTER 34

E lizabeth stormed out of Alexander's study, her vision blurred by the tears she fought to contain. The sting of his accusations still rang in her ears, disbelief mingling with the ache in her chest. How could he? Whatever fragile hopes she had nurtured about their marriage, about building a life together, crumbled with his distrust. To believe the whispers of society, to accuse her—of all people—of an affair with his brother? She had never thought him capable of such cruelty until now.

Her heart shattered as she turned sharply around the corner of the hallway, nearly colliding with someone. Strong arms reached out, steadying her before she could fall.

"Elizabeth, are you all right?" Percy's familiar voice came from above her, filled with concern.

At the sound of his question, something inside her broke. A sob escaped her throat before she could stop it, and without a word, she turned and fled, unable to bear facing him or anyone else in that moment.

Tears blurred her vision as she hurried toward her room, her thoughts a jumble of pain and confusion. She vaguely registered the sound of footsteps above, running along the upper landing, but she paid them no mind. When she reached her chambers, her lady's maid was there, oddly out of breath, but Elizabeth barely noticed. She dismissed the maid with a wave of her hand, not bothering to explain.

Once alone, Elizabeth collapsed onto the bed, burying her face into the pillows as her sobs finally broke free. She cried for what felt like an eternity, her heart aching with the weight of Alexander's accusations and her own helplessness. How could things have gone so terribly wrong? Just when she thought they had made progress, just when she had begun to hope for more, he had crushed that hope beneath his accusations. He would never love her—of that, she was now certain.

And to think that he believed she had feelings for Percy. Percy! The very notion was absurd, and yet Alexander had seemed convinced, his jealousy twisting reality into something unrecognizable. How could he doubt her so completely?

She wished, more than anything, that she could escape. To be anywhere but under the same roof as Alexander. He had become a reminder of everything she could never have, and the thought of facing him again felt unbearable.

When dinner time came, Elizabeth made no effort to rise from the bed. She had no intention of going down to dine with him, not tonight. Her lady's maid returned to help her dress, but she dismissed her once more, unwilling to entertain the idea of playing the dutiful wife at the dinner table.

But just as she settled back into the quiet of her room, a knock came at the door. Her heart gave a small jolt— was it Alex? But no. When she heard the voice that followed, it wasn't him.

"Elizabeth," Percy called from the other side, his voice light and encouraging. "I've come to escort you to dinner."

Elizabeth blinked, sitting up slightly in surprise. She hesitated, but Percy's voice continued, jovial and insistent. "Come now, you cannot hide away all evening. I'll not allow it."

She sighed, wiping at her eyes, though she wasn't sure what possessed her to do so. Perhaps it was his tone, or perhaps it was the desire to escape her own thoughts, but something made her get out of bed and move toward the door.

"But I'm not dressed for dinner," she said weakly when she opened it, gesturing to her simple attire.

"Balderdash," Percy said with a grin, offering her his arm. "Who cares about such formalities? We're only going down to stuff our cheeks and guts, after all."

Despite herself, Elizabeth chuckled softly, and Percy's grin widened as though he had won a small victory. She looped her arm through his and allowed him to lead her downstairs.

Throughout dinner, Elizabeth couldn't help but notice that Percy made a conscious effort to keep the conversation light, his wit and charm working tirelessly to ease the somber air that had threatened to settle over them. He was quick to offer a jest, always attentive, and though she remained quieter than usual, Elizabeth found herself appreciating his attempts. She wondered if he knew—if he had somehow overheard her argument with Alexander.

After the meal, Percy suggested they share a glass of wine he had brought back from Portugal. Elizabeth, desperate for anything to numb the pain of her current situation, agreed. They moved to the terrace and sipped their drinks in silence for a while.

But soon enough, Percy spoke, turning more serious. "I heard," he said quietly, glancing at her with a knowing look. "And I know how irrational my brother can be."

Elizabeth stiffened, her heart sinking at the direction of the conversation. She didn't want to talk about Alexander, not now. "I'd rather not discuss it," she said, her voice tight as she tried to steer the conversation away from the source of her pain.

But Percy, persistent as ever, continued. "I do not want to excuse his actions, whatever they may be," he said, his voice gentle yet firm. "But you should know, Alex wasn't always like this."

Elizabeth said nothing, staring out into the darkness beyond the terrace. She didn't need to hear more about Alex's reasons or excuses. She just wanted to forget, if only for a little while.

"The accident changed him," Percy pressed on, his voice softening as he spoke of their past. "He feels as though he's failed everyone—first Eleanor, and now you."

At the mention of Eleanor, Elizabeth's heart squeezed painfully. "What do you mean?" she asked, her voice hesitant, not entirely sure she wanted to hear the answer.

Percy sighed, looking down at his glass for a moment before meeting her gaze. "After the accident, Alex made a promise to our father—a promise to protect Eleanor. He was determined to keep it, but when she passed..." He trailed off, the weight of the memory clear in his voice. "It shattered him. And after I lost my hearing, well, he blames himself for that too."

Elizabeth blinked in surprise. "Your hearing?"

Percy nodded, offering a faint smile. "I lost hearing in one ear after the accident. Alex has carried that guilt with him ever since, as if he could have prevented it."

Her heart broke further for Alexander, for Percy, for all the pain this family had endured. She had known about the accident, but she hadn't known the depth of the burden Alex carried. And as much as she wanted to stay angry with him, as much as his accusations had hurt her, she couldn't help but feel sympathy for the man who had been crushed beneath the weight of so many losses.

Percy's next words caught her completely off guard. "I know you love him, Elizabeth."

Her breath hitched, and she looked up at him in shock. Percy's expression was gentle, understanding, but his eyes held a quiet certainty that unnerved her.

"And my brother," he continued, "is the veriest of fools and a coward, but I know for certain that he cares for you too."

"No, he doesn't care," Elizabeth shook her head, her voice quiet but resolute. She couldn't afford to hold on to false hope now—it would only break her further. "And I cannot bear to be around him, with this constant reminder." Her throat tightened at the admission, but she refused to let her emotions overwhelm her again.

"If that is truly what you feel and believe, I cannot change your mind," Percy said, his voice gentle. "But I do hope you take whatever time and space you need to reflect. To truly see the man that Alexander is—a man who cares deeply for you, even if he is too afraid to face his own heart."

Elizabeth's chest tightened painfully at his words, but she refused to believe it. Alexander didn't care for her. He couldn't. Not after what he had said, what he had accused her of. Whatever affections she had held onto were now shattered beyond repair. No, there was nothing left for her in that house but hurt and disappointment.

A decision settled within her then, firm and unyielding. She would leave. She would return to her family and take the space Percy suggested—not that it would change anything. It wouldn't make her see things as Percy hoped. Her mind was clear. She had lost whatever chance she had with Alexander, and there was no recovering from it.

Without another word, Elizabeth rose from the terrace, her heart heavy. She made her way to her room, not bothering to take any of the belongings Alexander had given her. They were gifts meant to maintain appearances, nothing more. There was no sentiment behind them, and she had no desire to bring anything that would remind her of the hollow life she had built with him.

She slipped out of the house quietly, telling none of the staff where she was going. But Percy knew. He didn't try to stop her, didn't try to convince her otherwise. His silence was his understanding.

When Elizabeth arrived at her family's home, she plastered a smile on her face, though her heart was breaking inside.

"Oh, after our hasty departure from the ball last night, I simply couldn't wait to spend more time with you all," she said lightly when her family welcomed her with pleasant surprise.

Her aunt and sisters beamed at her, none of them suspecting the truth behind her visit. But as they sat for tea in the drawing room, Elizabeth caught Anna watching her with a curious expression. Her cousin's eyes seemed to linger, as though she could sense that something wasn't quite right.

Elizabeth tried to ignore it, focusing instead on keeping the conversation flowing, on pretending that nothing was amiss. But when dinner approached and she asked to stay for the meal, the table grew awkward.

"You're abandoning your husband to dine alone?" Petunia asked.

Elizabeth hesitated for a moment before offering a dismissive smile. "Oh, he knows. And he will be fine."

Her answer seemed to ease their curiosity for the time being, but the weight of her lie pressed heavily on her chest. She pushed it aside and sat with them for dinner, but the knot of anxiety tightened with each passing moment.

It wasn't until later, when her uncle called her into his study after dinner, that Elizabeth's facade finally cracked.

"Elizabeth, my dear," Sebastian began, his voice soft as he led her to a chair. "You're welcome here, always, but something tells me this isn't just a casual visit. What is it, child?"

The concern in his voice, the kindness in his eyes, broke through the dam Elizabeth had been holding back all evening. The tears she had tried so hard to hide spilled over, and she found herself confessing everything. Well, almost everything. She couldn't bear to share the part about Alexander's accusations of an affair with Percy—it was too humiliating.

"We had a misunderstanding," she whispered through her tears. "I needed time to think."

Sebastian's arms wrapped around her in a warm, fatherly hug. "Oh, my dear. No marriage is without its misunderstandings. It will be all right. You just need time."

Elizabeth clung to him, her heart aching. "Can I stay here for a while? Just to... cool off?"

Sebastian pulled back and cupped her face gently. "You needn't ask. Our doors are always open to you." He turned to call Petunia, who entered the study with a concerned frown. When Sebastian explained, Petunia's face softened, and she joined in comforting Elizabeth, holding her close as they offered their reassurances.

Later, Elizabeth settled into her old room, a place that held the warmth and familiarity of her past. She had just gotten into bed when there was a knock at the door, followed by the soft sound of it opening.

Titan bounded in first, his tail wagging eagerly as he jumped onto her bed, followed closely by Plato, who padded over and licked her face with fervor.

"Oh, you boys ought to be asleep by now!" Anna's voice came from the doorway. "Why do you follow me about as though I have no privacy?"

"They just miss me," Elizabeth chuckled through her tears as she hugged the dogs close, their warm bodies providing a small measure of comfort. For a brief moment, she allowed herself to get lost in their affection, missing the simpler days before her life had become so complicated. Before her heart had become entangled with a man who would never love her.

Anna entered the room and perched herself on the edge of the bed, her eyes sweeping over Elizabeth with a scrutinizing gaze. "I knew something was off the moment you walked through the door. I wonder how the others didn't notice immediately."

"I'm glad they didn't," Elizabeth murmured with a self-conscious little laugh.

Anna tilted her head, studying her closely. "So, what's truly going on?"

Elizabeth hesitated, but the weight of her pain was too heavy to carry alone. And if she could trust anyone, it was Anna. She told her cousin everything—every detail, every hurt, every doubt. The words spilled out before she could stop them, and when she was finished, she felt raw, exposed.

Anna, however, shocked her with laughter.

Elizabeth blinked, startled. "Anna?"

"Oh, Lizzy," Anna said through her laughter. "It sounds to me like your husband has fallen in love with you, and his jealousy has gotten the better of him."

"Not you too," Elizabeth groaned, dropping her head into her hands. "Please, don't give me hope. Percy said something similar."

Anna chuckled. "Well, I daresay Percy is correct. And I do believe you two need some space to think—and perhaps return to your senses."

"You make it sound like we've lost them," Elizabeth said with a wry smile.

"You have," Anna replied without hesitation. "Desperately in love and utterly out of your minds. Look at you, Lizzy. It hasn't even been twenty-four hours, and it's clear to anyone—even a blind man—that you're already pining for him. I'd wager Titan that your husband is feeling the same right now."

"Wager Titan ?" Elizabeth asked, shocked at her cousin's confidence.

"Indeed. I see what you do not. What your pain is blinding you to, perhaps."

Anna's voice softened as she continued. "I believe Alexander is a good man, Lizzy. There's an explanation for his behavior, and I think it's his jealousy. I know he's hurt you, but don't be too quick to assume the worst. Give him a chance, when the time comes."

Elizabeth's heart squeezed at her cousin's words. She wanted to believe her, wanted to believe that there was hope. But the hurt was too fresh, too raw. " If it comes," she said, her voice tinged with hopelessness.

Anna smiled optimistically, her confidence unwavering.

A second knock sounded at the door before Peggy appeared, her playful energy filling the room. "A late-night party without me?" she teased, eyeing the scene with mock indignation.

Anna threw a pillow at her. "You weren't invited for good reason!"

Peggy picked up a pillow and tossed it back, but Anna dodged, and it hit Elizabeth square in the face.

Laughter bubbled out of Elizabeth as she retaliated, and soon the room was filled with the sounds of giggles and teasing as the three girls engaged in a lighthearted pillow fight. The dogs barked excitedly, jumping around the room as if joining in the fun.

For a brief moment, Elizabeth felt lighter, finding comfort in the warmth of her family's love. They reminisced about old times, making promises to always be there for one another.

Despite that, there was a space in her heart that Alexander had already taken, and nothing could fill it.