Chapter 24

24

There was a knock at the door.

Dorian raised his head, not wanting to leave the sweet, soft heaven of his wife's body. She stirred under him to wrap her arms around his neck tighter and press herself to him.

Dorian breathed, inhaling her sweet scent.

This was heaven.

This could be his life. His beautiful wife, so willingly and lovingly giving herself to him. Happiness and love pulsing through his blood at the very sight of her. His future with her could be bright, soft. Wonderful.

The knock repeated. It was as though reality had finally come calling.

The door opened before he could react, and Mrs. Knight came in, her eyes falling on him covering Patience with his body, no doubt taking in Patience's legs wrapped around his bare arse. Like the perfect ducal housekeeper she was, she allowed herself only a moment of shock, surprise covering her usual neutral expression.

Then she averted her eyes towards the window .

Patience giggled into his neck, her hot breath tickling him.

"Your Grace and Your Grace," said Mrs. Knight. "I wondered if I should send the footmen to remove the sheets and the maids to clean the room after all these years… It was such a pretty room when Her Grace was alive… But perhaps it's best to do it later."

After all these years… Dorian's whole body chilled.

All these years that his mama was not here.

He remembered her, so pretty with her dark hair, drinking tea here, and looking at the garden through this window with an anxious sort of expression.

Good Lord, he'd make Patience look like that sooner or later. Because a beast of fury lived within him. He had fallen apart in her arms earlier, and he was already breaking every rule he'd set for her and for himself.

He felt his grip on his emotions loosening around her. Would he be able to control his beast and not hurt her like his papa had hurt his mama?

And what of the terrible secret that would surely break her heart?

He loved her. He never wanted to leave her sight.

"That would be best, Mrs. Knight," he said.

He could not feel his body.

The housekeeper nodded and retreated from the room.

Unwillingly, Dorian separated himself from Patience.

He needed to make sure he wouldn't fall apart again, wouldn't smash things around her from fear, wouldn't put her in harm's way… He didn't care about his own injuries, but he wouldn't be able to live with himself at all if he hurt Patience.

She straightened on the sofa, looking at him with sated hooded eyes as, to his regret, she pulled her skirts down her legs. He pulled on his shirt and tucked it into his waistband .

"Poor Mrs. Knight," giggled Patience, looking as satisfied and as happy as a cat with cream.

He didn't respond. He hated doing this, but he needed to remove himself from her before he'd hurt her.

He'd been a fool to fall apart like he had.

To fall in love with his wife.

Goodness gracious, he was in love . For the first time in his life, at the age of thirty-two, he loved a woman.

The last one in the world he should love.

His murder victim's sister.

Her smile fell as she looked into his face.

Good.

"Nothing she hasn't seen before, I'm sure," he said gruffly.

Her eyes widened. "With— Oh."

The look of hurt on her face made his own heart break a million times. He ached to calm her, to assure her he didn't mean him. It would be so much worse, though, if she ever found out the truth.

He didn't correct her. He never had women here, and he certainly never slept with any of the maids.

"I must go," he said, his stomach twisting.

He had to force his legs to move away from her, while what he wanted most in the world was to scoop her into his arms and stay with her here, in this sunlit room.

He ached to ask her if she was still in pain. If he hadn't hurt her too much. To reassure her that any discomfort would fade away in a few days and that he'd keep bringing her pleasure for the rest of their lives.

But he did none of those things.

Instead, fear chasing him, he walked out of the sunshine back into the dark hallway, and then he broke into a run.

He was terrified.

He loved a woman, and she responded to him. She could love him, too. He had true happiness at his fingertips for the first time in his life…and he'd crush it all sooner or later. Hurt her like no one had hurt her before. He was sure of it.

He needed to hit something. Smash something.

Before he could break the love of his life's heart.