Chapter 23

Anxiety was caused by many things. It could be simple stress, a first date, or finding out a loved one was in the hospital. There were a myriad of reason, but they all had the same effect.

People would feel on edge, their stomach would churn, and other signs of possible oncoming panic. All of which were vastly different from the sensation causing the hairs on the back of my neck to rise right now.

The screen door clacked shut behind me as I stepped out onto the deck and scanned the pothole ridden roads of Sault Saint Marie Estates. Nothing looked out of place.

Mr. Garibaldi was sitting outside in his underwear and open bathrobe, sipping on a coffee. Sue and Winnie LeBeau were peeking out their window as the milkman disappeared into Mrs. Devereux's house, and like me, Billy and Kyle were getting ready to go to school.

The little pissants hopped on their bikes and rode past me while we gave each other death glares. The war would continue tonight, I had other things to worry about. Like the creepy feeling crawling up my spine.

I couldn't figure out where it was coming from. It seemed like a normal morning, but something was off. Warning bells were ringing in my head. Almost like I was being watched.

Huh?

Leaning over, I eyed the orange sign across the street on the cypress tree saying, ‘Gio's stalking spot, do not park.' The lack of a Range Rover should've made me feel better. But it didn't. Prickles continued to crawl across my skin.

"Novalee."

I jumped as Maw Maw swung open the screen door. Why did that thing have to be so squeaky?

"You forgot your phone."

Actually, I didn't. I left it in my room so I could continue to ignore Gio's texts, but whatever.

Rolling my eyes, I took the dreadful device. "Thanks Maw Maw."

For nothing.

"Go on." She waved her hands to shoo me off the deck. "You're going to be late."

There was at least thirty minutes before school started, which was twenty eight minutes and thirty seconds too late for Maw Maw. I don't know how many times I told her that being early didn't mean being on time.

Her and Gio would have a great time planning something. It might not be very exciting, but it would be punctual. God help the person who asked them to do that. And God help me for putting the two of them in the same thought.

"Go on child, git."

"Yeah. Yeah." When I once again scanned the block, Maw Maw's eyes narrowed.

"What's wrong with you?"

That felt like a loaded question.

"Do you mean today?" Because today wasn't bad so far.

I dreamt about Gio last night, which wasn't as wrong as missing his scent. But when I woke up I could walk without my vagina hurting, so there was that.

It still felt like Gio was inside me, but it was an improvement from how I walked into the house last night. Pretty sure Maw Maw thought I was drunk. I caught her hiding her wine this morning.

On a side note, under the couch was not the best hiding spot.

Maw Maw's eye further narrowed. "Are you on the drugs?"

The drugs?

"No Maw Maw, I'm not on the drugs." Unfortunately.

"Well then, why are you still standing here?" She pushed me down the steps. "Go to school."

The logic behind that question was flawed. In her mind was it only people on drugs that stood around? Because I was pretty sure I spent the last seventeen years proving that theory wrong.

Then again, I did manage to knock out a three thousand word essay on arranged marriages in under an hour. So, one could argue that I didn't need to get cracking as Maw Maw would say. I could still do everything I needed while standing around.

"Novalee Ford!"

"Alright Maw Maw, see you later." I waved over my shoulder and walked down the path to our crappy plastic gate.

"Make good choices."

Yeah, that clearly wasn't happening. Mistakes were kind of my thing. I didn't even do normal on a good day. Although I did brush my hair today, and put on a little makeup, so I kind of looked normal. Still wasn't sure why I did that?

The gate, of course, wouldn't open–not even when I kicked the bottom of it–which left me with no choice but to lift my leg and climb over. Grace had also decided to evade me this morning. My left shoe caught on the latch, causing me to trip flip over to the other side.

I lay on the ground groaning for a second before jumping up and brushing my skirt off. "I'm okay."

Maw Maw shook her head as I climbed in my truck and drove off to school.

There wasn't a lot of traffic on the road, which made the drive feel oddly short. It felt like only took five minutes to pull into St. Agatha's parking lot. Then again I wasn't necessarily paying attention. Pretty sure I knocked over someone's mailbox. It could've been a trash can? I didn't see it. I just felt the bump. My mind was otherwise occupied.

I hadn't talked to Gio since I left his house and I wasn't looking forward to seeing him again. At least I thought I wasn't?

It was weird coming home last night. Maw Maw's trailer was a place I usually felt comfortable. Instead I felt almost guilty. As if I'd done something wrong – which I kind of had.

I sat in the living room watching reruns of Murder She Wrote with Maw Maw and Veda, wondering if they knew? Could they see the sin on me? Could they tell I was different, because I felt different? Everything felt different.

Sighing, I looked out at the various students walking around. Did they know? It felt like I had a big neon sign on my forehead that said, ‘she slept with the enemy and liked it.'

A knock rang though the driver's door causing me to jump up and bang my head on the roof.

Cursing under my breath I glared through the window at the amusement curling Memphis's mouth.

"What the hell, Memphis?"

He coughed back a snicker. "It's not my fault you're jumpy."

"Well," I opened the door and climbed out. "You don't have to be so sneaky."

This was like second grade all over again, when he announced his presence by getting in people's faces. He was the weird kid that year, despite my excessive efforts to take that title.

"Why are you in such a good mood? Isn't your perfect boyfriend out of town?"

Memphis always got a little grumpy when Chuck had to go out of town for a game. Mostly because his dad never let him tag along. He thought allowing them to spend time together would only confuse Memphis.

That was Mr. Blake's way of making himself feel better about his son's sexuality. The last thing Memphis was, was confused. He knew exactly what and who he wanted.

"Why aren't you in a good mood?" Memphis cocked a brow. "Didn't you just have a weekend of orgasms and fun?"

I slung my bag over my shoulder and gave him an eye roll. "That was hardly fun."

"I do believe you used the words insatiable, sex master, and magic dick."

Well, if he wanted to remember everything. "That didn't mean it was fun."

I knew I shouldn't have called him when I got home. But I had questions. He didn't have answers because apparently being gay didn't give him a whole lot of knowledge on female anatomy.

Thank god for Veda and her Epsom salt bath. I told her I fell on my bike, but I don't think she bought it. Mainly because I didn't have a bike.

"Based on what you told me, I'd have to disagree. Sounded like fun to me."

"Of course you would. You have a dick."

If this weekend taught me anything, it was that guys really enjoyed their penises. Gio sure did. Maybe some part of me didn't mind the things he did, but that was beside the point.

Memphis cocked a brow. "How many times did he make you come?"

"Ugh, too many." I wasn't a sex expert by any means, but I was pretty sure that when orgasms became painful, you were supposed to stop.

"Okay," Memphis skipped up beside me as I headed for the main door. "So, if I'm understanding this right, Gio is an insatiable master at fucking who has a magic dick that made you come too many times?"

"Correct." That sounded about right.

"And, why are you complaining?"

"Well, first off it was Gio Mancini." A very valid reason in my opinion. "And secondly, when do I ever not complain?"

Someone needed to point out the world's problems.

"You're just complaining to complain." Memphis said while pulling open the door.

I walked inside and shrugged. "I don't see the problem."

"Yes, you do." Memphis skipped up beside me. "That's why you're complaining."

"How does that make sense?"

We turned down the hall for my locker.

"It makes perfect sense. Bitching about something is your way of avoiding the truth."

Twisting the dial on my lock, I sighed. "And what truth is that?"

"That you're starting to like Gio Mancini."

I snorted out a laugh. "Yeah, okay."

Dumbass.

Memphis leaned against the locker next to mine and arched a brow, as if saying, ‘I know you.' Which he totally didn't. Well… okay maybe he did but in this case he was wrong.

"I can't like Gio."

"Can't and don't are very different."

Did he forget who Gio was?

"Gio Mancini is responsible for everything that's happened to my family."

"No," Memphis shook his head. "His brother Atlas was."

That didn't mean Gio was innocent.

"He had Kato beaten up." So many times that I lost count.

"And Kato killed his brother for Veda."

What was his point? "Why are you arguing for Gio?"

"I'm not arguing for him. I'm just pointing out facts."

"Why?"

"Because of Cindy Fassbender."

What?

I stopped with my hand in my locker and looked his way. "I fail to see what Cindy has to do with any of this?"

"When Simon cheated on you, what did you do?"

"I was far too inebriated to remember anything I did." I vaguely recollected strobe lights and a watermelon.

"But you weren't mad at him."

That was his argument? "Of course I was."

"Then why did you stay at the party?"

"Well, because…" Huh? Why did I stay?

"You were so pissed at Gio that you couldn't wait to get away from him. And he didn't even touch her."

"Hey!" I spun around and pointed. "He shoved her on the ground."

That required touching.

The arch in Memphis's brow deepened. "And that angers you?"

"Yes it angers me. He shouldn't have…" I stopped cold as a grin spread across Memphis's face.

Damnit.

"Okay so made I was mad. That doesn't prove anything."

"It proves everything."

No it didn't. I was always mad at Gio. He was an ass.

"This is what you do Nova. You push people away before they can get close to you."

There was some flawed logic. "You're close to me."

"I also knew you before your life went to shit. Besides, we know way too much about each other to not be close."

That was true. I did know way too much about Memphis. Like how he swallowed the first tooth that he lost, that sitting cross legged made him dizzy, and that his first blowjob was in ninth grade with a guy named Patrick who coughed so hard sperm came out of his nose. But it didn't prove anything.

"I'm close to other people."

"Name one." Memphis challenged then quickly clarified, "That you're not related to."

Why did he have to be difficult?

I took a second to go through all the people in my life before answering. "Mr. Garibaldi."

His face dropped. "Plotting war against the local raccoon population with your neighbor does not count as close."

"Clearly you've never been to war." Things got intimate when planning an attack.

"Nova?"

"Memphis?"

"You're changing the subject?"

Oh my god."Why is this so important to you?"

"Because, I hate seeing you shut off to the world."

"I'm not shut off." Stuffing my books in my bag, I shut the locker door. "I just expect disappointment."

"What if Gio doesn't disappoint you?"

Oh please."Of course he will."

He hadn't yet. Gio had surprised me, pissed me off, and I kind of sympathized with him during a moment of weakness. Disappointment was just a step away. I was already disappointed in his stalking skills. Not to mention the lack of effort when it came to insulting me.

"Fucking Cindy Fassbender."

"What was that?"

Shit did I say that out loud."Nothing."

"You're still mad about Cindy?"

"I am not." I totally was. "Now, can we drop this?"

Memphis held up his hands in defeat. "Fine," then we headed down the hall for homeroom.

The topic was dropped as far as I was concerned. Then some girl stopped me in the hall.

"Nova!" She flung her arms around me in a quick hug that I was very uncomfortable with.

"You look great."

No, I didn't.

"I gotta run but we need to catch up."

I didn't even know who she was.

She rushed off down the hall and called over her shoulder, "I hope you and Atlee will come to my party this weekend."

Seriously? That was still going around?

I hung my head with a frustrated shake. "When is that rumor going to die?"

"You could always tell people you're banging Gio Mancini." Memphis sang with a smirk.

My face dropped.

"What?" He shrugged. "I mean… you don't like him, right? So, what does it matter if people know?"

Oh, it mattered. And he knew it mattered. "I hate you."

"Awe." He slung his arm over my shoulder. "Does the truth hurt?"

That's it, I was going to poison him in chem class.