14. Wrenlee

14

WRENLEE

" O h shit," Saylor says, looking over my shoulder.

I glance in the same direction and my heart speeds up even as my stomach drops in dismay. I quickly look around at the others in the room, but no one seems to have noticed the hulking Zmaj who keeps peeking around the corner into the room, and then pulling back.

"I need to use the restroom," I say loud enough that everyone in the room can hear.

"So go, you don't have to announce it to the entire world," someone grouses, not looking up from the stone bowl they are attempting to shape. Then they add in a mutter that is far from meant to not be heard, "Fucking princess. Like anyone cares you have to shit."

Saylor opens her mouth to say something, but I put a hand on her arm and shake my head. Holding my head high, I walk to the door. When I step around the corner, Sek'su is right there waiting. I pointedly ignore him, but motion with my hand, hoping he will pick up on my signal to meet me further away.

I walk down the hall towards the restroom. Sek'su is smart, which is good because I hear him following but not too close. When I get to the bathroom which, like everything here, doesn't have an actual fucking door, I step through the heavy leather. The room is empty. I check the makeshift stalls that we humans made when we designated this to be the women's room, and they're all empty.

I stick my head out the door, look quickly around, and then motion for him to come inside. He steps through and I know I should talk to him. Tell him how we can't do this, especially how he can't be showing up in front of others.

I should but I don't. Instead, I grab his horns, jerk his head down, and we kiss. His hands are on my ass, and I jump up, wrapping my legs around him. He groans into the kiss without breaking the contact of our lips.

"Stall," I murmur into his mouth, and he carries me into one.

I drop to the ground before the makeshift stool and working quickly I drop my pants, turning around as he drops his own pants. I bend over, supporting myself on the wall and a moment later he thrusts.

His cock penetrates hard and fast. I'm wet and ready and he slides in with only the slightest resistance as each ridge of his cock forces its way into my body. I grunt in pleasure as each one pushes in.

As he seats himself fully inside, he's moaning almost non-stop. He runs his hands down my sides, grabbing my ass, and pulling me back tighter. He holds me there as I wiggle against him. The nub that hit my clit so perfectly presses hard on my asshole and it feels really, really, good.

"Fuck me," I groan.

And he doesn't disappoint. He pulls back and then slams forward so hard that I'm pushed into the wall.

He grunts as I groan, and we fuck like there's not ever going to be another chance. Which there shouldn't ever be. This is wrong. Hell, it's not only wrong, it's stupid, but I can't not do this.

My face rubs on the wall as he pounds in and out getting faster with each thrust. An orgasm is building fast and fuck, I want it. I don't even try to hold it back. I'm panting, moaning, and then it hits, and I can't keep myself from letting out a low, mindless scream.

"Are you okay in there?" a female voice asks with a tremble.

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

"Fine, bad movement, that's all," I say the first thing that comes to mind even as my body is shuddering with the passing waves of orgasm.

"Oh, uh, sorry," the voice says, and I hear footsteps retreating from the bathroom.

Shit. Does she know who's in here? She can't. There's no way.

Sek'su is leaning over my back, holding me up with one arm and I'm grateful for it. My knees are so weak I don't think I could stand without his aid right now. Another tremor races through my body and I gasp in pleasure.

Slowly he pulls out and I push on the wall, forcing myself upright. I rest there for a moment as my knees continue to tremble.

"Fuck," I mutter.

The mess is leaking out. I grab the dried plant leaf that serves as toilet paper and do what I can to clean myself up but when I turn around his cock is right there, still glistening with our combined juices. It bounces up as if bobbing itself to say hello. I look up at him and smile.

"Happy to see me?" I ask, laughing.

"Always," he says, then he looks around and I'm pretty sure this is the first time he's actually thought about where we are. His scales turn an odd shade that I think might be what he looks like when he blushes. "Oh."

He bends down and grabs his pants from around his ankles, pulling them up and fastening them.

"Yeah," I say, getting my own pants back up after I drop the used leaves into the hole.

"I… did not mean this," he says.

"What, it wasn't good for you?" I ask, teasing but the look on his face tells me immediately that he took it seriously.

"No, good, yes good. Oh, very good. By Tajss, so good. I want always."

"I'm teasing," I say, placing a hand on his hard, chiseled chest.

"Oh," he says, frowning then he smiles. "Oh. I see. Yes. Funny."

His smile disappears as fast as it comes, replaced by tension in his mouth and jaw. It's not quite a frown, but it's attractive and I'm drawn to him. His frustration is palpable, but more than that I like his face. He has a strong jaw and bright eyes. There is a lump at the bridge of his nose where it was probably broken at some point. His chest has faint scars across the scales, and I can only imagine the damage it must have taken to leave permanent marks on them.

"Sek'su, I can't see you like this," I say, hating myself as I do.

His tight lips turn into a deep frown. When his eyes narrow it wrinkles his forehead which tugs his horns down. The pang in my chest hurts so much, I almost wonder if I'm having a heart attack.

I made that look on his face. I made him feel that pain and I feel terrible about it. But if I don't put a stop to it now, I never will. It's better this way. There is too much at stake for me to do this and let it continue. I can't really love him. Me? Can I? This is too complicated, and he deserves better than this.

Imagine that. Me. Caring about someone else.

I guess we can all grow, eventually. Well, everyone but Emery. She's one cold bitch and she'll do anything to take the crown, and that I cannot allow.

Why not? What difference does it make?

The question comes unbidden with surprising clarity. It's as if I'm stepping outside myself and looking at my entire life. The joylessness. I'm seeing it all for the fa?ade that it is. I've been a puppet dancing on the strings of my masters. The reporters and the undefined masses of people and all their expectations. I can't catch my breath. The cage I'm in glitters, but it's real. What if I threw it all away?

I can't. Who am I if I do?

And just like that, the moment is over. There is a dreamlike quality to the what just happened is as if it wasn't quite real. It fades in my memory, leaving me here with Sek'su, standing in a makeshift stall with the remnants of his cum drying on my thighs.

"Why?" he asks, his voice deep, tight, and throaty.

I am the worst. Fuck.

"I… can't explain it," I say, shaking my head as I struggle to hold back the tears.

"Don't," he says, gently placing three fingers on my cheek. "Treasure."

My heart is in my throat. I don't want to hurt him, but if I don't do it now, I know I'll be too weak to do it later. I can't be this close to him and not give in, and I clearly can't restrain myself when he's close. Even now, my pussy is still sore from the pounding he just gave it, I want him to take me again. I grit my teeth, intending to say the words. To make this final.

"We must be careful," I say, which aren't the words I had in my head. Either my mouth or my heart is betraying me.

"Careful, yes," he agrees and the note of pleading in his voice makes an echoing pang of pulsing need in my chest. "I will be."

I know this is a terrible idea, but the idea of not seeing him again, of not fucking him, but even more just not being close to him at all seems worse. When I look at the two options, be with him or not, the "not" path of not, is a pit of black despair. It doesn't mean that the "be with" path forward isn't going to be hard or that it isn't going to hurt, but I can't resist. I have to at least try.

"Okay," I say, mimicking him by placing three fingers on his cheek too. "Three to the face."

His smile is beatific, lighting up his face even as it sets my heart on fire.

I am in deep. Shit.

"Tonight—" he says, but I cut him off by moving my fingers to his mouth.

"Yes," I say.

He frowns, kisses my fingers, then pulls back enough to speak.

"Cannot," he says, and I love and hate the way my stomach drops and my heart hurts. "On a patrol. Punishment for losing control."

"Oh," I say, hating the sadness in my chest and in my voice too. "Okay."

I wanted to see him tonight. I wanted to fuck him again. And again .

"Tomorrow?"

I brighten at the offer and give him a big smile.

"Our special place?"

He smiles and nods. I lift onto the balls of my feet and kiss him, then slip out of the stall. Someone is walking in as I do, and I'm frozen in place. The woman looks at me and I feel like I should know who she is, but there are too many confusing thoughts and feelings colliding at once.

She's an older woman with hints of gray at her temples. She smiles and nods, moving on into the bathroom then she stops, staring at my feet.

Not my feet.

When I look down it's clear she's not staring at my feet, but at Sek'su's tail, which protrudes from under the makeshift stall. She slowly raises her eyes to meet mine. I flash her my signature smile and shrug, then sashay past her as if I don't have a care in the world. I pause outside the door, listening for what happens next.

"Sek'su, right?" the woman asks.

"Yes, Calista," Sek'su says.

Ah, damn it. Calista is one of the Council members. She's actually the first human to fuck a Zmaj. Will she keep her mouth shut?

"Treasure?" she asks.

My heart is thundering so hard in my chest that it sounds like a roaring in my ears, and I have to strain to hear what comes next.

"Yes," he says.

Simple. Direct. Very Sek'su.

"Good for you," she says. "But you shouldn't be in the women's room."

"Yes," he says.

I rush down the hall before anything else happens to screw this up worse than it already is.