19. Aiden

Chapter Nineteen

AIDEN

It was the dead hours of early morning, but Aiden was wide awake and energized like he'd been slamming caffeine all day. The temperature had plummeted, but his drafty trailer felt unusually warm with two bodies heating up the small space. Outside, a loose gutter rattled against the metal siding. It was a familiar background noise by now, one that Aiden had grown used to ever since the last big storm, when the zip-ties he'd used to secure it had snapped.

"How do you sleep with that racket?" Seth asked, pausing with one hand inside Aiden's tiny fridge and glaring toward the noise.

"That?" Aiden said, stacking his hands behind him as a pillow and grinning lazily. "That's just a trailer park lullaby, ol' son."

He lay sprawled on his narrow bed, naked beneath a thin sheet, watching as Seth rummaged through the makeshift kitchen. The bulb above the stove flooded the space with yellow light, warming the sinewy muscles of Seth's bare back. Aiden's gaze traced the definition of his lats and traps, the breadth of his shoulders, and the tautness of denim over his ass when he crouched to search a bottom cabinet for a frying pan.

He thought back to the day Seth had pulled him from the broken ice. In his delirium, he’d still recognized him. Even without the scars curving almost gracefully over his ribs, Aiden would know the shape of him.

"Try the drawer beneath the stove," Aiden suggested, propping himself on one elbow to get a better look. The drawer was empty, but the way Seth stretched to reach it was delicious. "Now, that's a sight a man could get used to," he drawled appreciatively.

Seth shot him a sidelong look over his shoulder. "You know, I don't have to do this," he warned, raising one eyebrow. "You could make your own pancakes."

"Yeah, but I don't want to walk. My ass hurts." Aiden grinned crookedly. "You owe me."

Seth's gaze dropped from Aiden's mouth and trailed down his exposed chest and stomach. "I guess you earned it," he said huskily. "You just lay there and look pretty. I'll do all the work."

"Damn right," Aiden said, stretching lazily. "I'm good with being objectified. Just don't burn my house down, chef."

Seth's warm chuckle pleased him. It sounded like the old Seth, the easy, happy cowboy Aiden remembered. He enjoyed Seth's relaxed grace as he moved around the kitchen. It was a stark contrast to the gruff reserve Seth carried around like armor these days. It was…nice. More than nice. There was nothing like a half-naked Seth McCall armed with eggs and a whisk.

Aiden shivered and lay back down, fluffing the cotton sheet and tucking it around his hips to disguise his interested cock. They'd already jerked each other off after their showers, and even though Aiden was ready to go again, he wanted to give them time to catch their breath.

They'd crossed a boundary that couldn't be uncrossed. This was new territory for both of them in so many ways, and Aiden was acutely aware of how unstable it was. He was pretty sure Seth had never so much as touched another man before, and Aiden usually only managed some drunken fumbling. But it was more than that. He'd never been with anyone who mattered this much to him, and he was terrified of putting a foot wrong. Their friendship had barely gotten back to stable footing after years of neglect, and now it had changed forever. But for now, he was willing to shove those worries aside and bask in the simple pleasure of Seth's company.

He watched as Seth cracked eggs into a bowl with practiced ease before adding pancake mix and a splash of milk. The sound of the whisk against the metal bowl was almost hypnotic.

"You seem comfortable in there," Aiden remarked, breaking the silence.

"Tessa loves pancakes," Seth replied, focusing on his task. His hair fell messily over his forehead, giving him a rough, wild look. "She went through a phase after Mom died where she wouldn't eat anything else for breakfast. I usually make 'em from scratch, though."

He poured the batter into a sizzling pan, and the bready aroma filled the trailer. Aiden's stomach grumbled, reminding him of all his effort working up an appetite. He shifted impatiently as Seth flipped the first two pancakes onto a plate and poured more batter. There was no way he could wait for a whole stack, not after Seth added the toppings and Aiden got a whiff of cinnamon and melting butter.

"I'm going to gnaw my arm off if you don't give me one of those," Aiden warned, licking his lips.

Seth's mouth twitched into a half-smile. "You can wait."

"I'm starving," he whined. "You think recklessness is my problem now? You ain't seen reckless 'til you've come between me and a stack of pancakes."

"Big baby." Seth shook his head but removed the pan and killed the stove. Aiden sat up eagerly, practically salivating as Seth carried the plate to him and knelt on the mattress. Seth braced his knees on either side of Aiden's legs and dangled a pancake over his head. "What'll you give me for it?" he teased.

"Anything. I'm dying over here. Pancake me." Aiden snapped his teeth like a trout going after live bait, but Seth jerked the treat back at the last minute. Droplets of melted butter rained down over Aiden's face, and he yelped. Seth laughed, taking pity on him, and folded the pancake in half. He allowed Aiden a hefty bite before gripping him by the chin and turning his face to lick the butter from his mouth.

Aiden closed his eyes, savoring the taste, and sighed contentedly. "Damn, that's good," he whispered. His lips moved Seth's ministrations into something like a kiss.

"Which part?" Seth murmured into his mouth.

"All of it." Aiden's lashes drifted lazily open. He arched against Seth's body, running his palms up the insides of Seth's denim-clad thighs. It was such a turn-on to be naked beneath him while he still had his pants on. It should make Aiden feel ridiculous, but it didn't. He felt cherished and decadent. "Who knew," he whispered to himself.

Seth propped himself up on one elbow to study him. He wiped a stray droplet of butter from Aiden's cheek with his thumb and asked, "Who knew what?"

"Oh, I'm just wandering." Aiden grinned sheepishly. "Just…the day we met. The day you became more than just a cool older guy who offered me a ride. Who knew it was going to end up like this? I wasn't looking for more friends. Hell, I wasn't even looking for a ride that day. But suddenly, you were there when I needed you, and it felt...important."

Seth's expression grew solemn. "Sometimes people come into your life, and you never really know how much they'll mean to you or what kind of impact they'll have. Good or bad."

"Good. Nothing but good," Aiden rushed to assure him, wrapping an arm around his neck and pulling him down for a kiss.

Seth didn't reply, but he did return Aiden's kiss with a sweetness that felt dark and a little desperate. "I wouldn't change things," Seth whispered against his mouth. "Even if I could, I'd do it all again if I had to."

It sounded ominous when he put it that way. Goosebumps prickled across Aiden's body, lifting the hair on the back of his neck, and he shuddered.

"Cold?" Seth asked, wrapping him in his arms and tucking him close.

Aiden pressed his hands to the flat of Seth's naked belly, eager to share his body heat. "I'm always cold in this tin can," he joked, trying to shake his strange feeling of foreboding. "Freeze in the winter, fry in the summer; it's practically the motto of the trailer park. I wish I had somewhere nicer to take you."

"We could go home. My home," Seth suggested, keeping his tone casual. His shoulders were tense, as if he was bracing himself to be rejected. "You always liked it there, and I want to check on Tessa, anyway."

Aiden's eyes met Seth's, searching for any hint of regret or hesitation, but all he found was the rock-steady, dependable affection that had been there from the start. Looking into those eyes felt like taking a deep breath.

"It's a long drive," Aiden waffled, "and I'm already naked."

"Yeah, but you could stay naked all day at my place."

"Not sure what Tess would think of that," Aiden mused. "I don't think I'm her favorite person right now."

Seth smoothed a hand over Aiden's belly, and Aiden foolishly tensed to give his abs better definition, sucking in to give the illusion of a six-pack. Seth huffed out a breath of amusement, tracing the delineation above his belly button with a fingertip.

"I didn't rip that Jensen kid's head from his body when he put his hand on her ass leaving the festival," Seth said, one mouth quirking upward in a wry smile. "She owes me. Besides, she's been on my case about finding some company ever since she came home. She'll be thrilled."

"Does she know you're…" Aiden hesitated, flummoxed. He'd always been sexually fluid, but Seth had never given any sign he wasn’t completely straight. He'd never dated much, even when they were young, but surely Aiden would have noticed if he'd been willing to hop the fence to the male side of the pasture now and then?

"I'm not much of anything these days," Seth said, interpreting the direction of his thoughts. "But I don't think she'd be too surprised. She wasn't the only one who had a crush on you back then."

"You did kiss me that night in the barn," Aiden said, searching his face. "Didn't you?"

Tension flickered across Seth's expression, and he pulled back to examine him carefully. "Do you remember anything else from that night?" he asked.

"Not really." Aiden sighed. "I wish I could. Maybe if I'd been around to help you feed the cattle?—"

Seth interrupted him with a swift kiss. "What's done is done," he said. "If you come home with me now, you can help me feed them in the morning."

"You raise a good point," Aiden mused, stroking his chin, but he couldn't hide the slow smile already spreading across his face. "Yeah," he said decisively. "Yeah, let's go home. But you've got to give me a minute to rev up 'cause my legs are practically out of commission."

Seth's lips quirked in a half-smile, filled with affection and quiet happiness. "Big baby," he teased gently. "You're going to milk this for all it's worth, aren't you?"

He stood and dressed quickly, moving with a grace that belied being such a big man in a small space. Then he grabbed the balled-up quilt from the foot of the bed and shook it out, tucking it securely around Aiden's body.

"What—" Aiden gave an incredulous laugh as he was unceremoniously flipped like one of Seth's pancakes. Once Seth finished cocooning him in the blanket, he hoisted Aiden over his shoulder like a feed sack. Aiden let out a whoop of surprise, instinctively clutching at Seth's back for balance. "I was joking!"

"I wasn't." Seth maneuvered through the cramped trailer with the ease of a lifetime of hard carrying, ducking to avoid the low ceiling, and just barely avoiding banging Aiden's head against the doorframe.

"My hat!" Aiden cried, scrabbling at the hook by the door for his Stetson. "Don't forget my hat!"

The frigid winter night slapped them as soon as Seth stepped outside, and suddenly, Aiden was grateful for the layers of quilt protecting him. The wind raced through the loose gutter, whistling like a railway engine. Aiden was protected from the cold, but he still shivered. He'd never been carried before—not sober, anyway—and it felt strangely intimate. It was doing things to his heart that he wasn't sure he was ready to examine.

"Hang tight," Seth murmured, breath visible in the air. He locked the trailer and then navigated the snow-dusted path to his truck, ice crunching beneath his boots. The world was upside-down wherever Aiden looked, a smeared monochrome palette that was difficult to make sense of.

Seth carefully deposited Aiden in the passenger seat, ensuring the blanket was still snug before stretching the seatbelt across his lap. He took a moment to brush a fat curl from Aiden's forehead, and their eyes met. Everything else fell away for a heartbeat—the future, but most importantly, the past with all its doubt and fear. There was only this moment, the two of them together…and it was perfect.

When Aiden finally found the words to speak, his voice shook. "I thought you said you were fed up with babysitting me."

Seth's eyes crinkled at the corners, just barely. "It's a tough habit to break," he said, chucking Aiden under the chin obnoxiously and laughing when Aiden glared.

"Get my boots," Aiden protested, but Seth had already slammed the door shut. "Wait—and clothes! I need clothes!"

"Trust me, you won't," Seth said with a chuckle. He ignored Aiden's protests, rounded to the driver's side, and started the engine.

Aiden howled, fighting to get his arms free of his trappings. "At least bring me a pair of boxers. Damn."

But his protests were mostly for show, and Seth knew it. A man who'd once hoofed it into town stark naked wasn't exactly body-shy or picky about what he wore. As the truck eased out of the trailer park and the heating vents began pumping warm air, an unexpected sense of contentment washed over him. He was going home. The old farmhouse that had always felt more like home than his mother's perfectly curated lifestyle.

As Seth opened up the engine and began the long climb into the mountains, Aiden felt the night close around them. There was no ambient light pollution, no signs of humanity, just the way the truck's headlights carved a path for them through the darkness. Despite the icy roads, Seth's hands were relaxed and confident on the wheel.

Aiden relaxed into his seat, feeling drowsy. Seth wrapped an arm around him, pulling him close to rest against his shoulder. Aiden sighed and let his eyes drift closed, bathed in warmth and the promise of Seth's big, soft-looking bed.

"Home," he murmured, already half-asleep. "Always thought of it that way. Missed…missed it when you wouldn't let me visit."

He thought Seth's arm might have tightened around him, but he couldn't be sure. He was already fast asleep.