Chapter 26

26

MERRITT

I felt like I understood him better. But that only served to confuse me. I had all these feelings and I didn’t know what to do with them.

“This has been nice,” Kannon said. “But I should get going.”

I wanted to ask him to stay but he was clearly dealing with a lot of emotional baggage. Talking about his late wife couldn’t have been easy. “Are you okay to drive?” I asked.

He shrugged. “Yeah. Wine is whatever. Maybe a couple of bottles could do it but not a glass.”

“I’ll walk you out, just to make sure you’re not staggering.”

Kannon grinned. “I won’t say no to that.”

We stepped outside into another chilly night. His bike sat in the driveway under the dim porchlight. I could see the scratches and dents, proof of what he had survived. It made my stomach twist.

“You really messed it up, huh?” I asked.

He glanced at me, his lips quirking into that familiar crooked smile. “It’s not so bad. Could’ve been worse.”

“Could’ve been you ,” I murmured, my gaze drifting to him. “It almost was.”

He nodded and looked down at his hands. “I’m still standing.”

I searched for signs of pain—any winces, a stiff movement, something. But he was acting like it was no big deal. He moved as if he hadn’t taken a bad fall, as if his bike didn’t look like it had been through a grinder.

“You have nine lives or something?” I asked, trying to lighten the mood.

“Nah. Just good reflexes.” He winked at me, and I rolled my eyes.

“Cocky as ever,” I said, but there was no real bite to my words.

We walked down the steps. I stayed close, hugging my arms around me. He straddled the bike.

“Helmet?” I asked.

He chuckled. “My helmet is done for. It’s not going to do me much good. And the visor is cracked. Can’t see shit.”

I tried not to stare, but damn, even on a beat-up bike with his body suffering from the crash, he still looked hot. The man exuded an air of rebellion and freedom that captivated me every time. He was the epitome of the bad boy on the exterior, but I knew deep down, he was still the fun and loving man I had called my best friend.

“Please be careful. Maybe you should let me take you home. You can buy a new helmet tomorrow and then get your bike.”

“I’m fine,” he said. “Lightning doesn’t strike twice.”

“You know that’s bullshit, right? It does. And it can. I don’t want your brains splattered on the pavement.”

“I promise I’ll be careful.”

I could feel him trying to run away. I wanted to stop him, but this was him. He didn’t want to sit and wallow in the memories he’d just spilled. I nodded and stepped back, determined not to push. Tomorrow was a new day.

I felt like we had resolved some of our issues. Tomorrow, we could be friends again. And hopefully, by the time I went back to Florida, we would be on speaking terms and this time we really would stay in touch.

Kannon turned the key and the bike gave a sickly sputter before falling silent. He tried again, muttering under his breath when it failed to start.

“Dammit,” he hissed, swinging his leg off the bike and glaring at it like that might fix the problem.

“You might have nine lives but your bike doesn’t, apparently,” I said.

He crouched down to check something near the engine. His fingers worked with an almost tender precision, but I could hear him cursing.

“I guess laying it down did more damage than I thought.” He sighed, wiping his hands on his jeans. “Shit.”

I didn’t feel his same frustration or disappointment that the bike didn’t start. “I guess you’ll just have to spend the night again.”

For a moment, the only sound was the faint hum of traffic in the distance.

“Merritt,” he said, his voice low, a warning I didn’t want to hear.

I reached for him, my fingers brushing his arm. “You’re welcome to stay. You know that.”

“I thought you said no kissing. No touching.”

“I did.” My voice was barely above a whisper.

He didn’t move, didn’t say anything. And suddenly, I hated the rules I’d put in place. The rules that felt like a wall between us, one I was tired of hiding behind. What were the walls protecting, me or him? I didn’t need protecting.

“Screw the rules,” I said, and before I could lose my nerve, I leaned in and kissed him.

He froze for half a second before kissing me back. His hands found my waist, pulling me closer. It wasn’t gentle. It was messy and raw, like we were both pouring every unsaid word and unresolved feeling into that physical connection.

When we finally pulled apart, we were both breathless. His forehead rested against mine.

“Merritt,” he said again, this time softer, almost reverent.

I didn’t trust myself to speak, so I just looked at him, hoping he could see everything I couldn’t put into words.

“Are you sure about this?” he asked, his hands still on my waist, grounding me.

I nodded, my voice steady for the first time all night. “I’m sure.”

He studied me, his eyes searching mine for any hint of doubt. Whatever he saw must have been enough because he kissed me again, slower this time, like he was savoring every second.

When we broke apart again, I couldn’t help but laugh softly, the sound surprising even me.

“What’s so funny?” he asked, his brow furrowing slightly.

“Just this,” I said, gesturing between us. “You and your stupid bike. It’s like fate doesn’t want you to leave.”

He smirked. “Maybe fate’s smarter than we give it credit for.”

“You think everything happens for a reason?”

“I think I don’t like to try and analyze everything.”

I took his hand, leading him back toward the house. We locked the door, turned off the lights, and went to my bedroom. The air mattress on the floor wasn’t exactly sturdy but I didn’t care if I was comfortable.

“Let’s see just how much damage you did to yourself,” I said and pushed the torn jacket from his shoulders.

“Do you plan on kissing all my boo-boos?”

“Maybe,” I said and continued to undress him. The more I saw, the more worried I became. “Are you sure we shouldn’t get you to the hospital?”

“I’m fine. It’s not the first time I’ve laid my bike down. Besides, with you touching me, I’m already feeling better.”

I stripped him down to his briefs and stared at him. He looked like a wounded warrior, all battered and bruised, but I had never found him more attractive. “Are you sure you’re up for hanky-panky? You look rough.”

“First of all, never call it hanky-panky. That’s old people speak. I’m not trying to fuck a grandma. Second, I want sex with you even if I’m concussed and actively bleeding.” He grabbed my hand and pulled it to his crotch. I didn’t need to feel the erection to know it was there. It was pretty fucking evident. “Now, get naked,” he ordered. “And be gentle.”

His tone didn’t leave room for argument. But I still looked at him, torn between wanting to be gentle and wanting him .

“Merritt, do you want this?” he asked.

I nodded slowly, my heart thumping in my chest. “Yes.”

Without another word, I slipped out of my clothes and together we stretched out on the mattress. I propped myself up on my elbow while he lay flat on his back. My hand trailed over his chest and down to his stomach. He flinched when my fingertips ran across the bruise on his ribcage. I kissed a trail over his pecs and lower to his flat stomach. My lips grazed the many little bruises dotting his side before moving lower. I gently pulled off his briefs, being careful not to graze the scraped skin.

I wrapped my hand around his cock. He was hot and hard, pulsing against my hand. A low groan escaped his lips as I began to stroke him.

I moved my hand up and down his length and he reached out to touch me. His hand pushed my hair out of the way, giving me a clear view of his face. While I watched him watch me, I ran my tongue around the head of his salty cock. He jerked and grunted with his eyes squeezing shut.

I leaned forward and took him into my mouth. It was primal and erotic, making me want more. His hips bucked against my mouth, his fingers gripping my hair tightly. The sound he made in the back of his throat was both sexy and needy. I moaned around his thickness, wanting him to know he affected me just as much as I did him.

He grabbed my shoulders, holding me still. “Fuck,” he ground out. “That feels so good.”

I sucked harder, my hand massaging his balls as I worked him with my mouth. His body tensed beneath me, trembling with the effort of restraint.

“Merritt, stop. Stop. I don’t want to come like this.” His voice was shaky, his breathing heavy.

I kept going. I wanted him under my spell. He groaned low in his throat before pulling me up. His gaze was hot and needy as he yanked me on top of him. I straddled his waist, feeling the rough scratch of his chest against my breasts. He ran his hands up my sides, over my ribs and cupped my breasts, thumbs teasing my nipples.

He pulled me down for a kiss. Our tongues tangled as I reached between us. I grasped his cock and guided him to my entrance. Slowly, he pushed inside me, filling me in one smooth motion. His breath caught in his throat at the same time mine did.

He looked up at me, eyes dark with desire. I rolled my hips, doing my best to keep my weight off him.

“You feel so good,” he groaned, his hips moving with mine.

We lost ourselves in each other on that stupid air mattress. The sound of our heavy breathing filled the room. His fingers dug into the soft flesh on my hips. I leaned back to give him a better angle. He ran his hands up my torso, teasing my breasts, making me arch and gasp. It made me feel powerful and needed. I moved faster and harder as his hands roamed across my body, his fingers a trail of heat.

He grunted, feeling the end nearing. I could feel him growing more rigid beneath me. “Merritt,” he groaned between clenched teeth.

I knew what he was asking. His grip on my hips tightened as I worked him closer and closer until the world seemed to explode in a burst of white-hot light. His body jerked beneath me, the muscles in his stomach clenching as he groaned loud and long. His fingers dug into my hips and his breath came in sharp, ragged pants. I could feel him pulsating inside me, hitting the sweet peak at the same time.

I threw my head back as waves of pleasure crashed over me, making me feel alive and connected to this man in a way that was both beautiful and terrifying. My walls clenched around him, sending pulses of pleasure throughout my body until I collapsed on top of him in sweat-soaked exhaustion.

I quickly shifted my weight off him. I curled up next to him, my head resting on his chest listening to his heartbeat slow down.

“Are you okay?” I asked.

He chuckled. “Oh, yeah. I’m feeling no pain. Turns out an orgasm is the best pain reliever.”

With a soft sigh, I traced my fingers along the lines of his chest and stomach, enjoying the rough feel of his body against mine. “And it has no side effects, right?” I teased, my voice barely above a whisper.

He chuckled again, the sound filling the silence of the room around us. “Exactly. It’s natural, no chemicals involved.” His hand ran up my bare back, tracing my spine with maddening slowness. “Although I am feeling a little sleepy.”

“Good. Sleep.”

I pulled the blanket over us and snuggled against him. I closed my eyes and let myself drift off to sleep with old feelings being stirred up.

Feelings I didn’t really know what to do with.