31. EDDIE

Chapter thirty-one

EDDIE

T hat Friday afternoon, I worked a lot before Jared came back from school. I looked around online at some cheap apartment rentals in case we stayed on a while after Megan's lease was up.

Although I was fine with him going to do some work, I couldn't help but wonder about Max and his absence. The confession of love of the day before might have been a coincidence, but I heard little from him that whole day.

I didn't want to be that person, but at the same time, it could be hard not to be because it seemed quite a coincidence that he should go quiet now.

On Saturday morning, Jared and I went downtown to the mall because he needed to get some things. Living in Manhattan, I hadn't really been in a mall like this in a long time, fast-food joints everywhere, armies of suburban girls roaming the clothes stores, the arctic blast of air-con everywhere you went.

I couldn't help but feel a twinge of nostalgia for my own teenage years spent wandering malls just like this, although the stores were different, the people too.

"Alright, Jared, where to first?" I asked as we entered.

"Let's hit up the sneaker stores," he said.

"Cool. Let's go."

He skipped away, leading the way to the nearest sneaker store. As we entered, his eyes darted hungrily across the displays of shoes. He picked up a pair of Nikes, which he said he loved. Then he looked at the price tag.

"Oh, man," he drawled. "I don't have a hundred-fifty dollars."

"How much do you have?" I asked.

His eyes turned to mine forlornly.

"Seventy-five."

It was funny because this was a glimpse of being a parent, I realized. Jared was going to look at sneakers, and there would be some assumption that I would pay, at least in part, because that's what dads did, right?

If some random person had come up to me and said, "Hey, can I have a hundred dollars for some sneakers, please?" I would have told them where to go. A few weeks before, I hardly knew Jared, but now I was going to buy him whatever he wanted. I was happy to. I was becoming – I was – the person who cared for him now.

It was those fatherly feelings again.

"Alright, I'll give you the extra," I said.

"Really?" he asked, although he probably had guessed I would acquiesce all along. That was probably why he said it.

"Sure," I replied.

He hugged me loosely, briefly.

"You're the best, Eddie."

Jared wasted no time getting the sales assistant, who went off and found a pair in his size.

"Check these out, Eddie!" he exclaimed once he put the Nikes on. "I'll be the sharpest dude in school with these bad boys!" He said this part as half a joke but half true. He looked so happy with them, and that made me happy, too, after everything.

I got my credit card out and handed it to the sales assistant.

"I think we've got a winner," I said.

After that, we went to get some food. Jared said he wanted a burger, and I was happy with that. We joined the line at the Five Guys concession. At the register, a young woman waited to serve us.

"Hi there, can I take your order?" she asked.

I nodded, scanning the menu board above her head.

"I'll have a cheeseburger with fries, please," I said.

"Sure thing. Any toppings?"

"Just cheese and onions, please."

Jared said he was going to have the bacon cheeseburger with spicy fries.

"Would you like anything to drink with that?" the woman inquired, her fingers poised over the register.

As I reached for my phone to pay, my gaze drifted to my notifications. No messages from Max. The absence of communication now started to worry me. Had I said the wrong thing when I told him I loved him? Had I forced him to say it back when it was not something he felt?

My phone bleeped over the payment terminal, and I put it back in my pocket. Jared marched off to find a booth, and I waited for the food, the numbered receipt in my hand.

I got my phone out again and wrote out a text.

Just in the mall with Jared buying sneakers – all good?

I watched the chat for a moment after I sent it. He didn't come online.

"Number 37!" a server called. That was me. I put my phone away again, picked up the food, and went to join Jared in his booth.

It was Jared's idea that we should go to the movies. I was surprised at his unexpected choice – a highly critically acclaimed Korean police thriller with subtitles, a far cry from the Hollywood blockbusters I had anticipated.

"Max would love to see this," he said as we took our seats.

I thought of my phone in my pocket.

"Oh," I said, "I need to turn this off."

I reached for my phone in hopes of seeing his response to my text, but there wasn't one. I switched it to airplane mode.

The lights dimmed, and a hush fell over the theater. Jared shifted in his seat beside me.

"I wish we had some popcorn," he whispered.

"You just ate a burger. And fries."

Pssht , he blew out through his lips.

"You still need popcorn." He paused a moment. "If I lived in New York, I guess I could go see films like this all the time. You don't get them here so much."

I turned to look at him, the white light of the opening credits casting a glow on his face.

"Yeah, we could," I replied softly, and he looked at me briefly and grinned.

Afterward, we sat in a little park opposite the mall entrance, a gentle breeze rustling through the clump of trees around our seats. We were deciding whether just to head home or to do something else. Jared had taken out his new sneakers out of their box and kept trying them on, putting them on, taking them off, putting them on again, lacing and re-lacing them different ways.

"When are you gonna see Max again?" he asked out of nowhere.

"I'm not sure, buddy," I replied evasively. "He's been real busy with work the last day or so."

"What work?" he asked, not looking at me, studying the sneakers.

"Some truck he had to fix."

Jared sighed, unconvinced.

"How long does it take to fix a truck?"

"You're asking the wrong person," I said.

He sighed again, this time more contentedly.

"I love my new sneakers," he said, finally turning to look at me. I smiled. "Max is gonna love them, too."

My smile faded a little.

"Yeah, buddy, I'm sure he will."