Epilogue

Rig

"Rig, you have a visitor! How nice! I'll let you two chat, he's more active today," the bubbly nurse says in a cheery voice. She doesn't see the panic in my eyes as she talks behind me to the only visitor I ever get.

I can't move my body or speak, but my eyes work. I stare down at the dirty biker boots as he walks around to kneel at the side of my wheelchair.

"More active, huh? Would you mind sending in the doctor? I have a few questions." Cruz stares at me with empty, cold eyes, but he smiles charmingly at the nurse who gushes over him before she walks out of the room quickly, muttering under her breath.

I can't move or speak. All I'm good for is listening and watching. It's been this way for years, ever since Cruz got the drop on me and admitted me to Ridgeway Psychiatric Hospital in Oregon.

Whatever the doctor pumps into my veins leaves me feeling crippled and barely here most days. It's the same routine every day. Meds, sitting in this god-awful wheelchair, staring out the window at the pine trees, shit, eat, bathe, and repeat. My body is a vegetable, wasting away each day until I'm going to be nothing, as long as those fucking pills are shoved down my throat. I'm a strong man, a biker at heart. I can take whatever life throws at me. Being stuck with my own thoughts, having someone else wipe my ass… it's torture, but I can live through it.

What I can't live through are these visits from Cruz. I hated the kid the first time I saw him, the fake mask he puts on for everyone didn't fool me. I should have watched him closer. I should have dug a hole and buried him in it. I was too late because now I have to listen to him describe in detail, every single time, exactly what he did to my Tillie.

This is a torture no father should have to go through. I failed my little girl, and I'm reminded of that each time he visits.

"You know, old man. When I put you in here, I had my doubts at first. Just kill the old biker and be done with it, I told myself, but then I got to thinking… Where's the fun in that? I thought I'd just leave you miserable for the rest of your sad excuse of a life. Telling you over and over how I raped your niece's sweet ass, passed her to club members like she's just another hole to be filled. Last time I was here, I almost considered ending your life. Just a little bit too much morphine and off you go, but imagine my surprise when I learned that Payne wasn't dearest daddy." Cruz stares into my eyes, flickering back and forth as he waits for my reaction.

He doesn't have to wait long.

My eyes widen in panic as my dry mouth tries to open in a scream of anguish, but only a gurgled groan comes out before my cracked lips.

"Oh, this is what I was missing the whole time. To see the fear in your gaze, exposing your weakness." Cruz breathes in deeply, his eyes closing in bliss as he leans in closer until he's looking at me again with a gaze void of any emotion. "It's almost like I can taste your panic, your pain. These must be feelings."

Cruz chuckles, looking unhinged as he closes the gap between us and kisses my forehead as a tear leaks down my cheek.

"I'm going to enjoy watching the world crumble around you, seeing all hope fade from your eyes as I take Tillie all for myself. Remember this, Rig." Cruz stands, gripping my shoulder as he walks around my wheelchair to whisper in my ear. "She's not your daughter, niece, friend, or anything else. She's mine. All mine."

I slowly blink, clearing my blurry vision as a figure steps through the open doorway out of the corner of my eye. I want to be able to move, even if it's just my hand so I can wrap it around Cruz's neck and keep squeezing until the life drains from him and into my waiting hands.

"Ah, Doc. Glad to see you're still keeping your patients calm and happy. I have a certain package for you, pure crystals." Cruz dangles a white powder baggie from his fingers as the doctor steps into my view. He quickly grabs the coke and puts it in his white jacket.

"Have some respect, this is my workplace!" the doctor hisses between his teeth, looking over his shoulder at the doorway, and upon seeing it's empty, his shoulders relax.

"Easy doc. No one knows you're an addict for cocaine. Your secrets are safe with me, as long as you keep Rig here on drugs to keep him nice and paralyzed." Cruz claps the doctor on the shoulder, enjoying as the little man shrinks into himself at the way Cruz is towering over him menacingly.

"O–of course. Whatever you need," the doctor stutters, gulping loudly as he glances quickly down at me and then back at Cruz.

"I'm so glad to hear that because I'm going to need a few months' supply to keep him this way. He's coming with me to see his daughter."

I hear Cruz's words echoing as if he's far away, his gaze hitting the back of my head with such evil intent that it practically burns into my skin.

I scream in my head, staring straight ahead at the swaying pine trees and being able to do nothing in the frozen, weak state I'm always in.

Not my little girl. Anything but her.