25. Shep

TWENTY-FIVE

Shep

I take a deep breath, feeling the weight of Elle's question. "I'm sure I want to try," I say, meeting her eyes. "It will be challenging, especially with Opie's situation. But you're important to me, Elle. And now that I have a chance with you again, I don't want to let it slip by. I'm committed to giving this a real try."

Elle's eyebrows raise slightly. "You said 'committed'. Are you sure about that word choice?"

I pause, considering. "You're right, I did say that. And I mean it. I know I've been hesitant about commitment in the traditional sense, but that's semantics. I can tell you I will not see anybody else while we are together. And if something changes for any reason, I make a promise that I will talk to you before doing anything."

"You need to stop saying you're worrying about adding stress to my life. If anything, you're a source of anti-stress. I look forward to talking to you, to seeing you, to holding you every day."

"I feel the same way, Shep," Elle reaches across the table, squeezing my hand.

I intertwine our fingers, feeling a sense of peace settle over me. "I'd like that. It feels good to have what's between us more defined."

I'm so grateful for her quiet support. I want to tell her how much it has meant to me. Even from the very beginning, when I thought Ari had left Opie, to now finding out about the dire prognosis, she has given me so much strength to navigate this. I don't do the best at communicating things like this, but I hope my actions show her how much I appreciate her.

Thursday, July 25

Lego Store

Houston Galleria

11:06 am

We've only been in Houston for two hours. We dropped our bags off at The Ritz but were too early to check-in. I promised Opie we would go to the big Lego store here, so that is our first stop.

I watch his face light up as he picks out a Lego set at the Houston Legoland. His excitement is contagious, but there's a heaviness in my chest, knowing what's coming next. We leave the store and walk to a nearby park, finding a quiet bench to sit on.

"Hey buddy," I say, my voice soft. "There's something important I need to talk to you about."

Opie looks up at me, his brown eyes curious. I take a deep breath.

"You know how Mommy's been away? She got hurt very badly and is in the hospital."

"Is she okay?" Opie asks, his brow furrowing.

I choose my words carefully. "She's very sick because a tree hit her very hard during the storm. The doctors are taking good care of her, but she's in a deep sleep."

"Can we wake her up?" Opie's voice is small.

I shake my head gently. "No, buddy. She won't be able to wake up while we're there. But we can still visit and let her know we love her."

"Will she have big machines like on TV?" Opie asks, his eyes wide.

"She'll have some machines helping her, but not as many as before. She'll have a small tube giving her air through her nose, but that's all."

Opie nods, processing this information as best a four-year-old can. "Can I bring her my new Legos?"

My heart swells with love for my son's innocence. "Of course you can, buddy. I'm sure she'd love that."

I pull Opie into a hug, grateful that he doesn't fully grasp the gravity of the situation. For now, this understanding is enough.

Pappasito's Cantina

Richmond Avenue

5:14 pm

The colorful decor and lively atmosphere seem to lift his spirits after our hospital visit. I told him he could have anything he wanted to eat, and he said chips and guacamole. So, chips and guacamole it is.

"How'd you feel about seeing Mommy today, Buddy?" I ask gently as we settle into our booth.

Opie munches on a chip, his legs swinging. "She looked like she was having a good nap. Do you think she liked my Lego spaceship?"

My heart clenches. "I'm sure she thought it was super cool, Champ."

"When will she wake up, Daddy?" His innocent question hits me hard.

I take a deep breath. "The doctors aren't sure right now, Bud. They are trying to let her brain heal. You know, that's why I always tell you to wear your helmet when you ride your bike. Our brains are so fragile, we want to protect our noggins."

Opie nods seriously. "I'll always wear mine now. I understand, Daddy."

"Good man," I say, ruffling his hair.

"Can Mommy come home soon?" he asks, hope shining in his eyes.

I swallow hard. "Right now, the best place for Mommy is at this hospital. They have special doctors and machines to help her."

"But you're a doctor, Daddy. Can't she come to your hospital?"

I struggle to find the right words. "My hospital is very far away, Buddy. And the doctors here know exactly how to care for Mommy's specific injury. It's important she stays here for now."

Opie seems to accept this, turning his attention to the kids' menu. I watch him, my heart heavy with the weight of everything left unsaid. But he seems satisfied with seeing her and the answers for now. We can delve a little deeper as things progress or when he is older.

For now, I feel like this was a success. I think it was good for both of us.

Friday, July 26

As we round the corner, I spot Elle waiting for us near baggage claim. I'm beyond happy to be back in Birmingham. Her face lights up when she sees us, and a warmth spreads through my chest. She appears to be glad we are back, too.

We took the early flight out of Houston this morning. It is a pretty easy two-hour flight, so it is nice to get back with most of the day ahead of us. I'm off until Monday, mainly because I wanted to give myself enough time in case things didn't go as well when we went to see Ari. So, I'm looking forward to a weekend of hanging out.

"There's my favorite boys!" Elle calls out, waving as we get closer.

Opie breaks into a run, nearly tackling her with a hug. "Elle! Elle! Look what I got!"

She kneels down, examining the Lego box he's proudly holding up. "Wow, that's so cool! Is that a spaceship?"

I catch up to them, smiling despite my exhaustion. "Hey," I say softly, pulling her in to hug her tight. She feels so good in my arms. I take a big inhale to drink in her scent.

"I see you got a new and improved cast for your arm."

She holds up her hand. "Yes, I've been downgraded. Now I can velcro on and off this neat-o splint," she says, directing it to Opie to show him. "No more wrapping it over and over with that bandage.

Elle stands, wrapping an arm around my waist. "How'd it go?" she asks quietly.

I nod, not wanting to get into details with Opie right there. "We'll talk later. But, in a few words, it went well."

"Elle, will you help me build it?" Opie asks, bouncing on his toes.

"Of course, buddy! I'd love to," she replies enthusiastically.

As we walk to baggage claim, Opie chatters away. "I'm gonna make it for my mom so she can fly back to Birmingham!"

My throat tightens, but Elle smoothly responds, "That's such a thoughtful idea, Opie. I'm sure she'll love it."

Elle squeezes my hand, and I'm grateful for her presence. Having her here, supporting us without overstepping, means more than I can express.

I watch Elle and Opie interact as we collect our bags and head to the car. She listens intently as he describes every detail of the spaceship, asking questions and showing genuine interest. It strikes me how naturally they relate.

7:12 pm

I close Opie's bedroom door quietly, my heart at peace with our trip and the fact that he's finally asleep. The trip to Houston was emotionally draining for both of us, but especially for my little guy. I pause in the hallway, taking a deep breath to center myself before heading downstairs.

As I step onto the patio, I see Elle sitting there, two glasses of wine on the table. The sight of her waiting for me, ready to offer comfort and support, nearly brings me to tears.

"Hey," I say softly, sinking into the sofa beside her.

Elle slides a glass of red wine towards me. "I thought you might need this."

I take a sip, savoring the rich flavor. "You have no idea how much I need this. Thank you."

We sit in comfortable silence for a moment, and the cool evening air is a welcome respite after the Houston heat. Elle reaches over and takes my hand, her thumb tracing soothing circles on my skin.

"How are you holding up?" she asks gently, breaking the silence.

I exhale slowly, trying to gather my thoughts. "You know, I'm doing okay. There were several moments I dreaded, but honestly, it went better than I anticipated. And I'm so grateful to you for helping me come to the decision to take him. That was the right call, and I'm so glad he got to see his mom."

Elle nods, her eyes full of empathy. "You're doing an amazing job, Shep. Opie's lucky to have you as his dad."

Her words warm me, and I squeeze her hand in gratitude. "I'm lucky to have you here," I admit. "I don't know how I'd handle all this without you."

Elle leans in, resting her head on my shoulder. "I'm here for as long as you need me."

We sit there, sipping our wine and watching the stars come out. Elle's presence is a balm to my frayed nerves, and I find myself relaxing for the first time in days.