Chapter Forty-Five

Sigiriya was a massive rock fortress lost in the jungle. While we climbed what felt like thousands of stairs under the curious gazes of monkeys, the heat slowly burned my skin away. Nirved kept repeating to us to keep a firm grip on our phones, sunglasses, hats, anything that could be lifted.

"Monkeys just seem cute," he said. "They are jerks, they steal stuff."

When Jessica laughed, he turned to her with a serious face. "I'm serious, they stole the latest phone from a previous group I took here."

She nodded solemnly and tightened her grip on her phone. Monkeys' eyes followed our ascent, and when a big boulder stopped us in our tracks, Benjamin climbed it first and stretched his hand to the next person. One by one, we climbed it, and when I was the last one standing, a familiar hand gripped my palm. Her hand was warm, and silky skin grazed mine. It was so painfully familiar that I looked up into her eyes. I could see the moment our hands met, her pupils going wider. I noticed that when I was up, she didn't release my hand immediately and that she brushed it with a featherlight touch of her fingertip.

Before I could say anything, Alice disappeared to the front of the group, talking to the tour guide.

We studied the frescos, the palace on the top of the rock, all the way listening to historical facts. The guide spoke in a flowy rhythm, as though he was reciting a poem, and sometimes it was difficult to understand what he meant. As he lectured us, my mind kept wandering away.

* * *

When we got to the small hotel lost in the jungle, I was tired, my body craving a shower. So when Nirved asked if anyone wanted to see traditional Sri Lankan dances in the evening I was the first to say that I'd stay.

Alice chose to stay too, along with Dave and one of our developers.

There was no Wi-Fi in that hotel, proudly labeling itself as a digital detox center. When I opened the door to the room and noticed a second twin bed, I remembered Benjamin saying that the hotel was too small to provide everyone with a separate room, so we were placed in double rooms. Later someone would join me here. I wanted to text Olga, saying that I saved her a place, but when I turned on the screen of my phone there was not a single bar. A real digital detox.

I dropped my backpack on the bed and rushed to the shower, finally stripping myself of the damp clothes and standing under heavenly rivulets of cold water. It was strange how little I needed, and how the simple shower felt like a luxury.

Twilight coated the trees when I ventured outside. The hotel sat on a small hill, a river flowing at the foot of it. The buzz of the jungle was so loud and alive that when I walked to the edge of the trees, the noise was so overwhelming that I just stood there, watching the darkening space, unable to process. When I finally turned away, I saw that I missed someone reading in a hammock nearby. Alice.

I walked to her.

"I'm starving," I said. "What about you?"

She laughed.

"Good luck with finding food here. There isn't a living soul besides us and a snoring developer, Dave went to the river. I tried to find a kitchen, but it's locked, and since we're far away from any village, we can't even eat out. The group will go to a restaurant after the performance, so I guess we're on our own. I have a few protein bars in my room. Do you want the most non-Sri Lankan food possible?"

As if on cue, my stomach grumbled.

"Let's go," she said, taking my hand and leading me inside the building.

Alice froze a few steps later, looked at our hands, and then up at me. And it was like a long time ago, when the noise of an outside world dimmed, leaving only the two of us. She didn't let go as she turned, opened the door, and led me inside.

"Did you notice how our bodies seem to be drawn to each other—like they don't remember that it's over?" I asked when she eventually let go of my hand and I was standing in her room, the twin of the one I was staying in. My heart hammered in my chest as my hand lightly tingled.

She didn't reply as she dug in her bag, taking out a few shiny bars.

"Alice?" I whispered and she lowered her head.

For a few seconds, she stood like that, her face hidden under the veil of blonde hair.

"Yes," she said quietly and walked to me. "I did notice it. I'm trying to fight the urge to be close to you all the time you are here. I'm trying to control my body, and you are making it impossible. When I pull away, you reach out. It's like a crazy dance we are trapped in."

Alice lifted her hand. It was trembling, but she caught a strand of my hair, and then released it. I closed my eyes, and she touched my cheek, the tip of my nose, painting a slow line on my lower lip.

She was closer, I could smell the painfully familiar vanilla smell.

"I have to go," I said, and stepped back.

She was looking at me, a hand dropping to her side. She was so eternally beautiful, magnetic, that it took my breath away. And now she stood there, so close, a storm of emotions raving in those gray eyes.

"I have to go," I repeated and dashed to the door. But I turned back, my hand gripping the handle.

That time, I was seeing not the flashes of the past, but the glimpses of the future if I just took a step in her direction. I could almost feel her lips on mine, the frantic movements of pulling our clothes off, my shivering skin when it met hers, our bodies pressed together, her fingers on my breasts, my hand finding its almost forgotten way between her thighs. A light moan on her lips, as my fingers slid on the slick of her wet flesh.

It felt so real, the possibility just seconds away. So I opened the door and closed it behind me.

* * *

Later there was a light knock on my door, and when I opened it, two protein bars lay on the floor on a paper napkin.