Chapter 11

Well, I’m an idiot. It’s confirmed.

I gave into my own overwhelming lust and desire for Oliver. My body took control, and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I feel betrayed by… well, myself if I’m being honest. I’m not even angry at Oliver for what just happened. It’s me. I’m the problem.

It was definitely the best sex I’ve ever had, though. It was exhilarating, painful, passionate, and somehow even healing. That’s not to say I’m a fully healed or renewed person after a few amazing orgasms from my ex, but it definitely felt so damn good to release some pent-up aggression and pain. And who better to take it out on than the guy that caused all of it?

But Oli didn’t deserve that gift from me. He doesn’t deserve any part of me, truthfully. I still have no answers about where he’s been for two years. Not even a crumb of an idea. All he gave me were cryptic answers and excuses. You can only say sorry so many times.

He abandoned me. He cheated on me. He broke my heart. I should hate him, and a part of me does. But the other part of me, the stupid part, still loves him. I think I’ll always love Oliver, but I will never be able to trust him. And now, with literally nothing on the line—except his kidnapped ex-girlfriend—he can’t even tell me one truthful thing. He says he loves me, but love isn’t supposed to pierce your heart and shatter it into millions of pieces.

Also, I drank his blood. That part is challenging to process. What possessed me to do that? I should feel disgusted. Dirty. But… I don’t. Drinking his blood was like drinking the finest red wine. When I drank it, I craved more of him. It was orgasmic, like injecting an aphrodisiac straight into my bloodstream. I shiver at the memory of him inside me, of taking his blood into me as I rode him.

“Do you still hate me, Dani?” Oliver asked, sliding his hoodie back over his head.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, I glance back at him while I pull my boots back on, hoping that being dressed will make me feel more comfortable. “The truth? Yes.” God, I do hate him. Nothing he can say, nothing he can do, can replace the last two years of suffering. Even if he did come clean, I probably wouldn’t believe him anyway. “And also no.” I suck my lips inward, staring down at my hands. “What we just did? It doesn’t actually change anything between us, Oli. Not unless you can give me something solid. Something real. I can’t trust you.” I let out a deep sigh. I’m not hopeful that he will tell me anything now.

“Danica. Look at me.” His voice is sincere, but I know he’s going to lie to me again. Reluctantly, I return my gaze to him. He’s so devastatingly beautiful. Why does he have to look like that? It makes hating him that much more complicated. Why can’t he look like a troll? His charming eyes bore into mine, and I fight the urge to look away. God, it hurts to even look at him. “I know that I’ve hurt you, and I know you want answers. I know you deserve answers… But, even if I tell you the truth, you won’t believe me, and you’ll hate me because it will seem like I’m lying again. So, the truth about where I was doesn’t actually matter. What does matter is that I meant every word I said to you tonight. Every damn word.”

“But that still doesn’t change anything, Oliver!” I burst out. “I want answers, even if you don’t think I’ll believe them. Because you thinking that is just one more way that you’re making decisions for me. If you can’t give me the truth, no matter how unbelievable, then I’d really like to just go home.” It’s too painful to look at him while he’s looking at me like this. Too many old feelings are resurfacing.

He heaves a sigh. “I can’t do that either, love.”

Anger fills my veins once more, a relief from the overwhelming pain that was settling over me. “Excuse me? Why can’t you take me home? What, am I just your hostage now?” I snap. This entire situation is all so absurd, and I just want this awful fucking night to be over.

“Once we reach our destination, I promise I’ll explain. It’s just… it’s just better that you don’t know yet, Dani.”

I stand up and face him with a fiery glare. Does he really think that he can just hold me hostage? That I’m his pet to be kept and ignored without any regard for my own wishes?

“Listen, I can tell you this.” Oli stops talking almost as quickly as he starts. His eyes glaze over; his head cocks to the side as if he’s listening to someone whisper in his ear. His face contorts, pain overtaking his beautiful features. Something’s hurting him. Badly. His arms reached up to grab onto his hair, pulling on the brown strands before he let out the slightest whimper that absolutely guts me to hear.

“Oli, what’s going on?” I reach my hand out to touch his arm. Maybe I can snap him out of whatever the hell is going on?

Just before my hand reaches him, Oliver appears to snap out of his pained trance. As if nothing happened, he begins to speak again. “What was I sayin’? Oh, right. I can tell you one thing, Dani, but you’re not gonna like it.” There’s something different about him now, something that wasn’t there before. He’s wearing a dangerous expression, almost feral, and it’s like the man I was talking to moments ago is gone.

“What the fuck is going on, Oliver? You’re starting to freak me out.” I clasp my hands together over my stomach nervously, hoping he doesn’t notice my trembling fingers. I don’t have a good feeling about this—about any of this.

Oliver notices my change in body language, lips tilting up in a ferocious grin. “Dani, there’s no reason to be afraid. I promise,” he hisses.

I note his tone, and panic is clawing its way to the surface. “Okay, Oli. What can you tell me then?”

“You wanna know the real reason why I didn’t come back for you for two years?” I nod, swallowing hard. “It’s funny actually. You killed me that day.”

I blink, stupidly, my brain desperately attempting to process what he just said. What the fuck?

He continues like he didn’t just drop a bomb on me. Clearly, I didn’t kill him. The evidence is standing in front of me, spewing this bullshit. “Took a nasty hit to the head that day. Do you remember doing that to me, love?” An amused grin spreads across his face. He’s enjoying my confusion, the toxic motherfucker.

“What do you mean I killed you? You’re standing right in front of me. Very much alive.” I’m starting to freak out, my breathing and pulse uneven as shock starts to course through me. This is beyond unreal. This is pathological. If he’s coming up with a story like this, I don’t even know what he’s capable of anymore. Well, besides really great sex and kidnapping. Those things he’s got on lock.

“You killed me that day. But that meant he could remake me into what I’m supposed to be. I’m finally walking down my true path.” He laughs a little maniacally. “You helped, pet. You started the series of events that made all of this happen. This whole time, you’ve been wondering what happened to me, where I went, why I left, it was all. Because. Of. You.” He enunciates every single word with brutal clarity as he steps towards me.

I’m frozen in place. I can’t move. And we’re on a moving bus, so if he tries to hurt me, I’m trapped. I’ve never been so entirely at his mercy. “Oliver, you’re scaring me.” My heart feels like it’s going to pound through my chest, the beat so loud I can hear it in my ears. I try to back away, but my legs hit the bed behind me, and Oliver is at my front. I’m actually trapped here.

“I know you’re scared, pet.” He breathes in deeply, his eyelids fluttering before he raises them to direct a dark glare at me. “I can smell your fear. It’s fucking delicious.” A feral grin spreads across his face, but it’s not humorous. I feel like this must be the look victims see right before they’re murdered. “Aren’t you happy to have some truth now? You killed me, Dani. You should feel like a shit person for what you’ve done.”

I want to scream, but who could even hear me? The music is still blasting outside from the front of the bus. I think they actually made it louder than it was when we initially entered the bedroom, maybe to cover up our screams of pleasure. I flush guiltily at the memory of riding Oliver.

Oliver strides over to me and grabs both of my arms with an iron grip. I let out a scream. Oh my god, he’s going to actually kill me. “What the fuck are you doing, Oliver?” I shout.

Oliver is opening his mouth to speak when the bus brakes start screeching as it swerves and weaves violently. If I’m going to escape, it has to be now. I tense slightly, but Oliver notices and, with a growl, pushes me back onto the bed. “Don’t fucking move, pet.”

I sit on the bed, frozen in place. Although my body won’t move, my brain is whirling, hatching an escape plan. Waiting for my moment to try and run for it.

The front of the bus goes silent as the music shuts off. A few seconds later, Noah’s shouting through the locked door, “Oi! Mate, we’ve got a huge fucking problem! Get out of there!”

Oliver vanishes in a cloud of black mist.

How…? I feel like I’m about to throw up in terror. I don’t know what’s happening, but I know I need to get the fuck out of here. I’m too scared to even begin to process what just happened. My breathing is too fast, barely providing me with any real air. Although I can barely focus, I know this is my only chance to escape. I start to get up from the bed to run. I don’t know where. Just somewhere. Anywhere that isn’t here in this room filled with the scent of sex and my fear, apparently.

And then time stops. I’m suddenly floating off the bed before being catapulted through the air.

Drifting…Drifting…

The bus crashes onto its side, and I land hard, smacking my head against a wall. Or a door. I can’t see exactly what I hit, and that somehow seems extremely important. The bus is still moving, and I’m bouncing around from the wall—now floor—but all I can hear is everything falling and crashing around me and the sound of metal screeching across the pavement. But then… there’s nothing.

My thoughts stop as my eyes flutter closed, and I sink into darkness.