Chapter Eight

JULIAN

May 5, 1990

It's been a mixed emotions kind of weekend. I'll start off with the good. Yesterday was Grayson's eighteenth birthday. His parents threw him a party. Or at least I should say his mom Martha did. That afternoon when we got out of school, he dropped me off on the corner of Tamarack. He insisted on taking me instead of the bus, so I walked a few houses down to get home. I'd already told mamá I was invited to my friend's birthday party last weekend when we were in town. So, she let me pick out a gift. She thought it was for a girl I liked. Boy, is she so clueless.

Yesterday evening at his party, I sat across from him at a picnic table in their front yard next to Megan O'Connors and Chip White from school. Grayson had a falling out with Kevin Miller, because he doesn't like me. Even though I'm a few months older than he is, Grayson is still so protective. He stopped being friends with Kevin in late January, after we got closer to one another. I thought to myself what he'd think of the gift I brought with me. Due to the nature of it, I left my name off the package. I knew once he opened it, he'd automatically know it was from me, anyway.

Martha forced his dad, Clint, to grill hamburgers and hotdogs. I could figure he may have been drinking all day, because my burger was still raw in the middle. After this weekend, I'm much too afraid of Gray's dad. Thankfully we all enjoyed a piece of cake a few minutes later, so I at least had something to eat that night. Megan's mom dropped by to pick her up, saying there was a family emergency. This was like a sign from above that gave me a quick excuse. Since she didn't bring a gift, if anyone wondered who the unmarked present was from, I decided I'd say it was from her.

Grayson chose to open the gift from Chip first, so he wouldn't show any favor over mine and not rouse suspicion from his parents. Well, Martha anyway. Clint went inside after grilling the meat. Grayson displayed the digital watch Chip gave him with a pose in front of Martha, holding her camera. He quickly sat it aside on the end of the table before picking up my present, a small black box with a thin red ribbon. Immediately upon opening it, he smiled in the usual way that makes my chest pound. Rather than taking it out to show everyone, he put the lid back over the box. Martha piped up wanting to see what it was, as she held up her camera another time.

"Who's it from Grayson?" Martha asked.

Grayson shrugged his shoulders while taking the teddy bear pendant with a black cord out of its box to pose for the picture. "I don't know," he said. "There's not a name on here."

"I'm pretty sure I saw Megan lay that down when she got here," I added into the mix.

He nodded his head. "I think that's who it was," he said with a grin so big that only I knew what it really meant.

Grayson looked at me from across the table as if he were thanking me in some telepathic way. But I knew when I picked it out last week, it was so perfect that he'd appreciate the symbolism. He continued to open the rest of his gifts, showing way less enthusiasm about them than mine.

The humidity started dying down as his party wrapped later in the evening. When I rose to go inside for the bathroom, I heard a whistle coming from the backyard. Grayson caught my attention with a wave, urging me to go talk to him in private. I looked around the front to make sure nobody saw me sneak to the back. My heart pounded, and it only grew stronger as I got closer.

"When everyone leaves here in a few minutes, act like you left without saying goodbye to anyone," he whispered with a hand at the side of his mouth. "But come around to the backyard from over there—" he said, pointing from the opposite end of the house. "Then sneak into the barn."

I had a feeling I knew where his mind was headed when I reached for his arm. "But your parents are home."

Grayson shook his head. "My dad is already pissed drunk and passed out in his chair, and my mom will go to bed once everyone's gone."

The sinking feeling in my gut knew it was a bad idea. But the urges exploding inside my chest—and my crotch—wanted to finally experience sex for the first time. Especially with my Sugar Bear. Like the saying goes, ‘the heart wants what the heart wants.'

"Okay," I replied. "I'll be there."

His cousins left with his aunt and uncle a few minutes later, serving as my cue to sneak out back. This only left Chip to leave after I pretended to. I tiptoed behind the house like I was acting in some spy movie, while trying my best to avoid making any noises once I reached the barn door. And to my disappointment, it creaked slightly trying to wedge inside. Much like the fishing shack back in February, it was nearly dark. Well, apart from the subtle glow of a waxing gibbous moon shining in through a small windowpane high above the barn door. As if I wasn't already nervous, a whinnied sound came from the far corner, scaring me half to death. Grayson never told me he owned a horse.

I stood in the center of the barn for what seemed like thirty minutes. But Grayson promised he'd join me when the coast was clear. And I trusted his judgment. After another few minutes, I heard a scraping sound from the door before witnessing him shimmy through just like I did. He gently closed it before walking past me to the wall behind us. I heard the strike of a match, and soon after, a glowing flame at the end of a long stick. He lowered the fire between a glass tube, which was connected to a metal pot with a wide wick sticking out from it.

"You prepared ahead of time," I said in almost a whisper.

"You don't gotta be quiet, this barn is almost soundproof if everyone's inside the house," he assured me.

Grayson's charming grin returned to his face. "I've been waiting for this moment for sixty-three days," he said. "You're damn right I prepared ahead of time," he added while unfolding a blanket. He draped it over a wide stack of hay.

"That's mildly impressive," I replied.

He stepped in my direction to take my hand while his lips fell into mine. "Can your ‘Saccharo Ferre' unwrap his final birthday present now?"

"Ita—quod potest."

Grayson chuckled. "I'll take that as a yes."

I nodded with a big grin. "Yes, smartass."

He looked into my eyes as his hands touched the top button of my plaid shirt. It was finally going to happen. Sex with Grayson Welles. At that moment, my mind blanked, and I almost didn't know what to expect or do. I've seen it in movies and TV all the time. But my brain seemed to block out the only kind of education I've had on intercourse I've had access to. I only hoped he knew what he was doing. Within seconds, my shirt fell to the ground while Grayson started on the bottom half. He slid his fingers from the base of my crotch and up the zipper. I could feel my cock growing. Nobody has touched me like that before, and damn was it intense. He unhooked the button while pulling the jeans down below my knees.

I brushed the back of my fingers against his cheek, before tracing both hands down the sides of his body to his waist. His t-shirt easily slid up over his head before he released his arms from their sleeves. I leaned in to plant a kiss on his lips, then slid my tongue down his chin and neck. I continued until I reached the waist of his black denim shorts. After a quick look up into Grayson's eyes, almost as if I were asking for approval, he winked back.

"Go ahead," he said.

I glanced in the direction of his horse, then back to him.

He shrugged. "Don't worry about Jasper, he's seen my dick a hundred times," he said. "I frequently masturbate out here."

At his instruction, I unzipped the shorts and they slid to the ground around his ankles. I hooked both of my hands under the elastic of his white underwear and pulled them down gently. I've heard in conversation with female friends back home that they suck on their boyfriend's cock, so I assumed gay couples did the same thing. His is a bit smaller than mine, judging by when I play with myself in bed. And he doesn't have extra skin surrounding his either. It smelled kind of sweaty, but the feelings rushing through my body made me worry less about how unpleasant it might be. So, I imagined it was just like a thick candy cane. It tasted like a very salty peppermint stick, but nothing I'd complain about.

Grayson let out a moan as my head moved back and forth a few times before I felt his hands touch my hair.

"Let's take the sucking a little easy," he said.

I looked back up into his face as if I'd done something wrong. "Are you okay? Did I do something wrong?"

"No—no—" he said while shaking his head. "Cutie, we're new at this," he added. "I think we're supposed to save our ‘stuff' until we're inside each other."

I replied with a clarifying question. "You mean cum?"

He nodded. "Yeah, that."

"Boy, you couldn't tell we're virgins," I joked while raising a palm to my forehead.

Grayson kneeled to the ground in front of me. "Do you want to know what it feels like?" He asked with a grin that I swore screamed silently—'we need to fuck soon because I can't hold it in much longer.'

I nodded. "O Deus meus, yes I do."

"Get up," he said.

As I stood, he pushed me gently back onto the blanket draped over the haystack, while tugging on my underwear. I could feel my cock throbbing with so much excitement. Jasper neighed in the background and blew out a burst of air from his nostrils just to subtly remind us that he was watching from the corner.

There were a few moments of awkward silence when I glanced into Grayson's seemingly surprised face. Perhaps he was just as bewildered as I was that our dicks don't look the same.

"Oh my God, you're bigger than I am," he said rather nervously.

He wrapped his hand around it while pumping up and down a few times. I looked straight up toward the wooden beams which held the roof of the barn together, while Grayson's wet mouth surrounded my dick. I felt it slide in and out several times, probably for a good couple of minutes before he stopped. But it felt so fucking good, I didn't want him to stop.

"Okay cutie," he said, creeping his body up against mine before leaving another wet kiss on my lips. "You gonna go first or me?"

"I'll go first, it's your birthday," I replied.

Grayson pointed over to the flickering light. "There's some Vaseline next to that kerosene lamp," he said as I climbed down from the haystack.

I stepped over to the lamp and popped off the blue lid from a rectangular jar, dipping my two fingers. I've never used Vaseline on myself before, just lotion. So, I didn't know how it would feel. I found the thicker texture surprising as I slid it all around the extra skin of my cock. I returned to Grayson lying on the haystack, and being my first time, figured there is only one place it went. It took a little bit of force and pushing. But once inside, the tightness that surrounded my dick felt fantastic. My head pulled backward as I let out a sigh.

"Oh fuck, Grayson," I moaned.

Then he did the same. "Unnghhh, that's fucking incredible."

Being my first time, it didn't take too many thrusts for me to feel like I was about to release my cum. In fact, after only a couple of minutes, I moaned again. That time a bit louder than before. Once I pulled out from Grayson's hole, a pool of my cum dripped out onto the blanket. A look of approval could be seen on his face, so I must have done everything right.

"That was amazing, Julian," he said while the sparkle in his eyes twinkled brightly.

At the precise moment we were about to switch places, we heard the creaky barn door swing open. I looked at Grayson. His shocked expression was more like a look of horror. Then I heard the loud thundering scream come from his father's mouth before glancing over my shoulder.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TWO DOING IN HERE?!?!"

Grayson immediately leapt to his feet while I stood there covering my crotch as if I were an exposed deer in the headlights that was Clint Welles. Grayson couldn't get so far as picking up his shorts from the ground before his father shouted again.

"YOU'D BETTER GO THE FUCK TO YOUR ROOM—BOY—GOD DAMN IT—I DIDN'T RAISE NO FAGGOT."

I could see the look of pure terror in Grayson's eyes while I scrambled to put on my jeans and reached for my shirt. Through my own fear and embarrassment, I think I heard him say he was sorry before scramming out the barn door. I couldn't even slip on my shirt, when I turned around to see Clint walking toward me with eyes so big they could've popped right out of his skull. I backed up as far as I could until I felt the itchy wood paneling scrape against my skin.

"AND YOU!" He shouted at me, even though he was only a few inches away.

I swear, in the brief moment of one single blink, I felt the impact of his right fist plow into the side of my face. It was so hard, if it were just half of an inch lower, I'd probably have spit out teeth. I know his father is an alcoholic, but I didn't imagine he was that violent. I cried instantly from the pain while he grabbed my throat with the grip of his left hand. Just as soon as he pinned my neck against the wall, he punched me in my stomach almost as hard as the first. My windpipes immediately felt like they were clogged as Clint continued to shout more.

"IF I CATCH YOU ANYWHERE NEAR MY BOY AGAIN, IT WON'T BE MY FIST YOU MEET," he paused to briefly look over his shoulder before his angry eyes returned to my frightened face. "I'LL FUCKING KILL YOUR SPIC ASS WITH THE BARREL OF MY SMITH & WESSON 10 MM."

I squirmed around trying to breathe, but it was impossible. His grasp was so tight, no air could come or go. I thought I was going to die right then and there. Luckily, he unclenched his hand, and I broke free with enough time to allow some oxygen to flow.

While not a shout, Clint endlessly scolded me while I hunched over in an attempt to catch my breath. It was still difficult due to the blow to my gut. I could feel my face was already beginning to swell up. Lightly touching it with my fingers caused me to feel the immediate warmth radiating from what is now, a welted bruise.

"I'm gonna do you one favor and save your parents from the embarrassment of having to find out from me that their son is a flaming faggot," he said. "But so help me God, I promise you'll be meeting your maker if I see you even so much as look at my boy," he added. "Does that sink into your little beaner head?"

I was so frightened. All I could do was nod my head. Not a single word could escape my shaky mouth.

"GOOD!" He shouted again while he pointed out toward the barn door. "Now get the hell out of here and dontcha ever come back!"

I darted straight out into the backyard. Painfully, I reached the end of Grayson's dirt driveway before stopping to slide my feet into tennis shoes and put my shirt back on. I was in just as much pain as fear during the whole walk home in the dark. Since Felton doesn't have many streetlights on the outskirts of town, it took me dang near half an hour. I haven't heard from Grayson since he apologized and ran out at his father's behest. If Clint wasn't shy about beating someone else's kid, I fear what he did to his own once I had left.