2. Montana

Istood beside Erik, reeling over what had just happened. Magnar was a vampire. And he clearly wasn’t handling it well. I cursed Idun for everything she’d done to us, even in death she’d lingered long enough to be vindictive in her final act on Earth.

Clarice was wrapped around Fabian on the ground as she came apart, sobbing into his shoulder over the loss of her brother and his husband. I felt their pain like an arrow in my chest, their grief a tangible thing that lived in the atmosphere.

I took Erik’s hand, willing my mind to sharpen as I turned to him, knowing he needed me to be strong more than anything right now. His face was stoic and his expression distant. Loss poured from his gaze and a crease had formed between his eyes that I couldn’t imagine ever going away.

I slid my arms around him, wishing I could offer him more than just comfort. That I could bring Miles and Warren back. But they were gone. And there was nothing anyone in the world could do to fix it. The loss of them hurt me in a way I never could have imagined once upon a time, but I’d changed and there was no denying that anymore.

Erik slowly came back to his senses in my arms, sliding a hand onto my back, but despite being physically close, I felt so distant from him that I couldn’t bear it.

“Erik,” I whispered, cupping his cheek as tears built in my eyes.

I tried to make him look at me, but his gaze was fixed over my head in the direction Magnar and Callie had taken. I didn’t know what to say. It was pointless asking if he was alright when I knew he wasn’t. He was broken. Hurt and grieving. But his silence was something I didn’t know how to bridge.

“The truck...” he murmured vaguely then pulled away from me, heading toward the vehicle up the hill. I gazed after him as the tears fell from my eyes, spilling uselessly down to the cracked earth at my feet.

I spotted Chickoa hunting through the rubble, plucking out a shattered picture frame from under a stone. She took the photo from within it and discarded the frame on the floor as she tucked the picture into her pocket, her brow heavily furrowed.

She turned her gaze to the house which was still burning, the powerful flames reaching toward the sky as it devoured her home. Smoke and blood and death carried on the wind, surrounding us all in a cocoon of despair.

“It’s alright,” Fabian murmured to Clarice, rubbing her back in soothing circles.

“It’s not, nothing’s ever going to be alright again,” she croaked, and Fabian shut his eyes, his grief clear in his expression.

Julius moved to my side, gazing at the two Belvederes as their pain filled the air around us. He took my hand, squeezing. And that was enough to help my heart grow a little stronger. The slayers and the royals were my family now. I’d do anything I could to try and soothe them.

“Do you think Callie’s safe with Magnar?” I breathed to Julius.

I knew my sister would never have heeded my warnings, but Magnar would be starving. What if he lost control around her? The thought made my stomach churn with worry.

“Yes,” Julius said quietly. “No curse on Earth is strong enough to make him hurt her.”

I nodded, a sharp lump growing in my throat as I thought about what Magnar must have been going through. His whole life had been pledged to ending the vampires. Despising them. Though he’d made his peace with Erik and his family, I doubted he could make peace with his own body being tainted in that way.

I glanced up at Julius as I forced away the last of my tears. His face was ashen and I could sense a darkness looming over him like a shadow. I laced my arms around his neck as I realised how much Magnar’s curse must have been paining him too. He held me tight and his pulse thrummed in my ears as he released a shuddering breath.

“We’ll break the curse,” I promised and he nodded against my shoulder.

“That’s all that matters now,” he growled, stepping back and glancing behind him as if he hoped to see his brother approaching. But he wasn’t there.

Erik drove the truck down the hill, pulling up the parking brake and remaining inside as he waited for everyone.

“You should go to him,” Julius said softly and my heart splintered as I gazed toward the vehicle.

“I don’t know what I can say,” I admitted. “He’s so hurt...I’m afraid I’ll make it worse.”

“You’re his wife, he’ll want you with him. Even if he doesn’t say it,” Julius said, his brow lowering.

I nodded, wiping the dampness from my cheeks, not wanting to break down. I had to be there for Erik. I just wished there was something more tangible I could do.

I parted from Julius, walking to the passenger side of the truck and tugging the door open. Erik didn’t look at me as I climbed in and shut the door behind me. The thunk sounded deafeningly loud in the quiet space. My mouth grew dry as I reached across the seats and rested my hand on his arm.

He was as still as a statue, his gaze set on the hill beyond the windshield. He seemed to have withdrawn into himself even more and I couldn’t be sure he was fully aware that I was sat beside him.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered. He shook his head but remained silent. “I’d do anything to bring them back.”

He continued to stare at nothing and my heart broke for him as the air became weighted with his anguish.

“You’re in shock,” I said gently, but still he didn’t answer.

I settled for taking his hand and holding it firmly. After a beat, he retracted his fingers from mine.

“We should get on the road soon,” he said flatly.

“Erik,” I tried again, leaning forward and wishing he’d just look at me. He refused to meet my gaze and it was killing me.

“There’s enough blood in the trunk to last a few days at least,” he continued.

“Talk to me,” I urged and he turned half way toward me as if to meet my gaze, then looked away again. “Whatever you need, I’ll give it to you. We’ll get through this together,” I promised, fighting back another wave of tears.

He finally looked at me and his eyes were as cold and as hard as steel. “I need to be alone for a while,” he said, his tone hollow.

I nodded, hurt lancing through me as I retreated into my seat. I took hold of the door handle, but a wave of hesitation stayed my hand. Before I could think better of it, I lunged forward to hug him.

He didn’t hold me back. His hands balled into fists and I sensed him tensing in my arms. I was desperate to help him come to terms with this, but I knew how difficult that was. I’d only recently lost my father and I was still coping with that loss every day. I knew everyone dealt with these kinds of things in their own way but leaving him alone was the hardest thing he could ask of me.

“Go,” he growled and I withdrew from him sharply.

His jaw was clenched as I gazed at him, unsure how to react to this. He’d always gotten angry when trying to deal with his emotions in the past, but this felt like a wall I couldn’t break through.

I bowed my head, slipping out of the truck without looking back. My soul crumbled as I shut the door and walked away. I made it three steps before I sank down to the ground and hugged my knees to my chest.

How had everything fallen apart so fast?

I set my eyes on the trees that Callie and Magnar had disappeared into, praying to see them returning. Fear trickled through me at knowing she was off alone with him in his current state.

I felt so helpless to everyone I loved. I couldn’t right the terrible wrongs that had befallen us. I couldn’t do anything but sit here and watch the world buckle around me.

Dark clouds hung above me in the sky, hiding the sun and threatening rain. I wished it would come and wash away last night. That we could go back in time and do things differently. We should have gone to Callie so that she could have hidden us with the ring before Idun ever showed up.

I clenched my jaw, knowing that reality would have meant Idun still lived. But what was her death worth if it had cost us two of our friends’ lives and placed Magnar under the vampire curse?

I spotted Chickoa heading across the valley to where some of her cows were huddled together under a tree; they must have been terrified after what had happened right at the edge of their fields.

I rose to my feet and headed toward her, wanting to do something useful. Anything to take my mind off the pain slicing through my body.

I started jogging, then running until the wind whipped through my hair and I felt some semblance of relief just from moving. I caught up with Chickoa as she clucked her tongue at the four cows and they moved toward her with tentative steps.

She spotted me approaching and nodded to one of the cows as it started to break off from the group. “Get around that side. Keep her in the herd.”

I jogged forward to comply, circling the large black and white animal and waving my hands to get her back into the group.

Chickoa spoke to them in soothing words and they soon followed her, their movements more reassured. I walked at the back of the herd to keep them walking as Chickoa led the way toward the barn.

“I’m sorry about your farm,” I murmured, glancing at her house and seeing the roof had caved in as the fire started to die down at last.

“It’s not your fault,” she said with a sigh. “I’m glad that goddess is dead.” She turned to look at me over her shoulder with a deep frown. “I’m sorry about your friends.”

I nodded stiffly, wanting to talk about anything other than that.

“What will you do now?” I asked gently. She couldn’t stay here with the farmhouse in ruins.

“I’m still going with you to the mountain. I have a friend who will look after the farm,” she said as we reached the barn and she ushered the cows inside.

I followed her and set about helping to feed and give water to the cows in a stall. When we were done, we headed back outside where a drizzle was starting to fall from the thickening clouds.

Chickoa gazed over the valley at our group huddled by the truck. She took the photo from her pocket and ran her thumb across the picture of her and her husband.

“I’ll rebuild it, Terry,” she said softly.

Guilt crept into my gut that we’d come here and brought this disaster down on her head. She didn’t deserve to be caught up in this mess. But our fates were woven together now. And she was clearly prepared to take on the journey to end the curse for good. Honestly, we could use all the help we could get.

“Is Erik alright?” Chickoa asked me and my gut knotted at her words.

I shook my head in answer. “He’s hurting so badly...and he doesn’t want me near him.”

She laid a hand on my arm and I glanced up at her, finding understanding in her eyes. “My husband was the same. He always retreated into himself every time something bad happened. But you just have to stick with him, Montana. He needs you more than you know right now. It is the way of some men. But if you give him time and an ear to listen every time he needs it, he’ll come around.”

“I hope so,” I breathed, fearing what this grief might do to Erik.

“I know so,” she promised. “I’ve seen how much he loves you. This is just a road bump. Life has a lot of those unfortunately.”

I gazed at this beautiful woman who must have seen so much more of the world than I could ever wish to. She’d walked this Earth for a thousand years. Lived and loved. And it gave me hope that she could see a glimmer of light right now. Because to me, the world was a dark, dark place where the sun no longer shone.