Chapter 25

twenty-five

Wrenlee

The smell of homemade pizza hits me as soon as Ian opens the door. With his big hand on my back, Cash guides me inside. Ian and Candace’s condo isn’t quite as grand as Cash’s, but it’s not far off.

“Come in!” Candace calls from the kitchen. “I have a glass of wine with your name on it.”

Ian makes a noise that’s somewhere between a laugh and a grunt. “I’ve got beer with yours.”

“Thanks, man.” Cash gives him a chin-lift as Ian points in the direction of the kitchen. “Candace is in there. She won’t let me in the kitchen.”

“We’ll all die of food poisoning; she let you in there.” Tav skips away from a slinky black cat that weaves between him and Kane.

Like a boy in a candy shop, Kane bends fast to snatch the kitty in inked arms. It wails a kitty howl of protest as he slams it into his chest, murmuring, “Love me,” into midnight fur.

The cat clearly isn’t down with ‘loving Kane’ because it twists, angling sharp kitty teeth toward Kane’s chin. As though expecting the trajectory of kitty teeth, Kane releases him at the last moment. The cat lands gracefully on all four feet, turning around to give Kane a parting hiss before strutting leisurely into the kitchen.

“Satan!” Kane calls after a thin black tail that flips side to side before looking back to us. “He loves me.”

“You just like it when they play hard to get,” Tav mutters.

“Or he’s delusional.” I pat Kane’s shoulder in mock sympathy as I follow Bells into the kitchen.

Kane says something, but I’m not listening as I enter the kitchen and find Candace standing with a big bright red painted smile and glass of wine. She nods to a second full glass and says, “Good to see you out, babe.”

I lift the glass, sip, and gesture to the pies. “Need help?”

She shakes her head. “Everything is done. Just need to be popped into the oven, now. I’m just enjoying a glass of wine in the peace of my kitchen where no man is brave enough to venture.”

I snort. “Cash ventures.”

“I bet he does.”

My eyes land on her to see she’s studying me. “You’ve been feeling better, lately?”

“Yep.” I’m not sure where she’s going with this, because I’ve been to a few shows in the last couple weeks. Sadly, I missed Halloween as I’d been too tired after the arsenic scenario, but I was much better now.

“That was scary.”

“It was.” I know what she’s talking about. “I’m sorry you were there for it.”

“I’m not.” She pops two pizzas into the oven before coming around the island to sit next to me. “Friends are supposed to be there for each other. I’m happy I was there for you. Still, it was fucking scary.” She takes a long sip. “Honestly, I thought you might die.”

“I thought I might die too,” I admit. “Maybe I even wanted to at one point.”

She makes a noise between a laugh and a gasp. “Can’t imagine it was fun for you.” I take a sip of my wine in answer, smiling when Bells strokes his body against my ankle. Candace tips her head forward. “That’s surprising.”

“What?”

“He likes you. He doesn’t like anyone.”

“I’m a cat person.”

“Apparently.” She takes another sip and turns more to face me. “When you were sick, Cash was out of his mind, you know?”

“Yeah, I do.”

“Like, really out of his mind.” I’m uncomfortable under the scrutiny of her stare, but I do my best not to crack under the pressure of it. “I’ve never seen him that way over—anything.”

“He blames himself,” I whisper into my wine. “Though I don’t know how. It couldn’t have been more random.”

She doesn’t say anything for a long moment, just watches me. Then she pulls in breath and says, “I really like you. I don’t make friends easily and I’ve, like, never had a girl friend. So, the fact we get on like we do is great for me.”

When she pauses, I say, “I’m sensing a but.”

“Cash is really serious about you. I mean—really serious.” She pins me with her eyes, searching for answers to all my secrets. “I guess I’m asking if you’re serious about him.”

I know I shouldn’t, but I want to tell her the truth. She’s right. She is my friend.

But she was Cash’s first.

And he’s been so good to me, telling her that this thing between us isn’t real feels like a betrayal of his trust and I don’t think I can do that.

I’m torn.

“At first, I was trying to guard my heart,” I say around the truth. “I didn’t want to fall for him—not really fall for him—because he didn’t seem like the kind of man who would fall back, you know?”

She nods but says nothing.

I go on. “Now—I don’t know what’s happening between us now.”

“What do you mean?”

I want to be as honest with her as I can be without revealing the truth of our deal. I consider my words for a long moment. “Cash is patient with me. He doesn’t—um—push for what I’m not ready to give.”

“You’re telling me you’re not sleeping with him.”

I blink wide eyes at her. “How do you know that?”

“Babe, I got you dressed when you were sick, remember?” When I nod, she says, “That’s when I suspected your relationship with him wasn’t as advanced as you both made it out to be.”

My face is on fire. I clear my throat. “He’s been respectful.”

“I have a feeling there’s a whole lot more going on between you two than you’re telling me, but I also see you have real feelings for him, so I’ll let it be what it is. You know I’m here and I’ll listen if you need an ear.”

Surprising myself, I blurt, “I’m a virgin.” Then I cover my mouth with my hands, shock washing over me like a cool wave.

I can’t believe I just said that.

Did I just say that?

Candace slow blinks. Then she leans in and asks, “Does Cash know?”

I shake my head. “No.”

“Wow.” When she laughs around a gulp of wine as I hiss, “Candace!”

“Sorry, girl. Sorry.” She eyes me up and down, then mutters again, “Wow.”

“Argh.”

“You’re with Cash and shit’s getting pretty serious from what I’m seeing, so I guess that figures you’re going to give it to him then, right?”

“I—” I pause. Was I going to give it to him? I want to…I think. “I don’t know.” Dropping my face into my hands, I moan. “This is going to sound stupid and hellishly antiquated, but it means something to me.”

“I can get behind that,” her tone is gentle, so I lift my head.

“You can?”

“Sure. Wish I would have given it to someone who meant something to me.”

“You didn’t?”

“Girl, no. It was awful. I was too young, and I hardly remember his name. Or the names of the men who came after.” She considers for a moment. “If I could go back, I’d have saved it for Ian.”

“Hardly anyone feels this way anymore,” I admit. “It’s all girl power and feminine right, which I get…” I raise my hands. “But for me, sex means something.”

“You do you and fuck everyone else. If it means something, hold onto it until you’ve got that special you’re waiting for. There’s not a damn thing wrong with that.” She gives me wiggly brows. “Just know that Cash is Cash, and when he wants something, the man goes for it with everything he has. I’m talking whole hog. And babe, he wants you. All of you, from what I’m seeing.”

“I want him too.” I take a big swallow of wine that burns on the way down. “That’s the problem.”

Candace hoots a laugh. “Well, you’re fucked then, babe. I’ll enjoy the show as it plays out, though.”

“What show?” The deep voice is one I’d know anywhere. It follows me into my dreams, both waking and unconscious. It’s everywhere. He’s everywhere.

My skin heats and Candace snickers. I want to throw an elbow at her, but instead shoot a smile at Cash. “No show.”

He tips his head back in that way he does as he appraises me. The man is already impossibly tall, but when he stands like this, dominating the space, he feels even bigger.

A small smirk pulls at the corner of his mouth. “Ian’s wondering when the pie’s will be ready.”

Candace slides off the stool to strut to the oven, calling, “Babe!”

“Woman!” Ian shouts back, but I can hear he’s already on his way to the kitchen.

Over her shoulder, Candace tosses me a cheeky wink. “Go sit with your man, babe. We’ll bring out the grub, eat our fill and get ready for a long ass night watching our men get hit on by a crowd of women on stage.”

Swiping my wine from the counter, I scurry from the room with Cash hot on my heels to do as I’m told.