Chapter 32

I could already tell that I was going to kill this man before I even had this baby. He was already doing the fucking most. Today was our first appointment with the OBGYN and he was about to make us late. We were lucky to get this appointment because he made me cancel the first one because of the physician being a man.

Since I found out I was pregnant, I’d been looking for a female doctor. All the highly recommended ones weren’t taking new patients. The man I finally went with was highly respected and had an impeccable record.

That didn’t matter.

“I don’t want no nigga looking at your pretty ass pussy and getting any ideas. I’ll shoot his ass dead.”

That was his logic.

I knew it came from nowhere but watching those damn Lifetime movies with my mama that week and a half he stayed there with me. He told me if a nigga ever tried to fuck me while I was carrying his child, he would end up in a body bag.

Rather than argue with him, I canceled the appointment and continued my search. I found nothing, and I was pissed about it until he came to me one day with an appointment card for the OBGYN I really wanted to go to.

When I asked him how he got me in, he simply told me that money talks. I wondered if a threat accompanied that talk. I didn’t question it, though. Now today was the day of the appointment. After we left, we planned to go tell my mother and his family.

“Deuce, I can buckle myself in!” I fussed.

“Sit your ass back and let me do this. You ain’t about to squish my damn baby.”

I heaved a frustrated sigh. He looked at me and grinned as he clicked the seatbelt into place.

“Fix your face, mama.”

Tipping my chin, he pressed his lips to mine before closing the door. I pulled out my phone to text Shar.

Me: Is it a crime of passion if I kill him now? You think I could blame it on the hormones and plead temporary insanity?

Bestie: LMAO ?? . He can’t be that bad, Salima.

Me: Oh, but he is and I’m only freshly pregnant. I have months of this to deal with.

Bestie: At least he ain’t a deadbeat.

Me: ?? I guess.

Bestie: Make sure you get me a set of ultrasound pictures!

Me: I got you.

I needed several printouts, and I hoped it wasn’t a problem. When I looked up from my phone, we were in the drive through at Coffee-ish, my favorite coffee spot. I smiled as Deuce ordered my favorite drink and breakfast sandwich. I guess that made up for him getting on my nerves.

“What do you say?” He asked, dangling it in front of my face as he pulled off from the window.

“Hand it here.”

“I’ll eat this shit right now.”

“I’ll beat your ass too!”

He laughed as he handed the items over. “Here, greedy.”

“I’m eating for two. Remember that.”

“Whatever, woman.”

As we pulled to a stop sign, I turned his head to mine and kissed him softly.

“Thank you, Daddy.”

“You’re welcome.”

With my mood lifted, I ate my sandwich and drank my drink with a smile on my face. Fifteen minutes later, we arrived at the Palmetto Women’s Care. Deuce got out and rounded the passenger side to retrieve me. Hand in hand, we walked into the building. I checked in, then filled out my paperwork before taking a seat and waiting.

“What do you think we are having?” he asked, curiously.

“I don’t know. I kind of want a girl. If it’s a boy, I want to name him after my dad.”

“I’m cool with that. I wouldn’t mind a son or a daughter. You know you can’t give me just one, right?”

I giggled. “You don’t even know how this one is gonna act, and you’re talking about more? We could have an angel or a hell raiser.”

“Baby, I have five siblings. I like having a big family. Do them muthafuckas work my damn nerve? Hell yeah. But those are my hittas. When the world is against me, I know I’ve got them.”

“I get that.”

“Also, you know that one year at the apartment is canceled and so is you working at the lounge. I need you to focus on school and I need you and my baby with me.”

“Stanley, what have I told you about telling me what I’m gonna do?”

He kissed his teeth. “Salima.”

I folded my arms and looked him up and down. “Ask me.”

“You heard what I said.”

“And you heard what I said. I can always go back to my mama. I can fix my room up real nice and me and baby Dillinger can stay right there.”

His jaw clenched, causing me to smirk. I cuffed my finger around my ear and leaned into him.

“I’m waiting.”

He ran his tongue across his top teeth and sighed. “Baby… will you please consider moving in with me. I would like for my family to be under the same roof. It’s important to me.”

I smiled, knowing that he was sincere on that front. “Now was that so hard?”

“I’m sick of you thinking you can punk me.”

“Because I can and I do.”

He waved me off. “Well?”

“Yes. I’ll move in. And I’ll quit the lounge. I was sick of those bitches, anyway.”

“That’s what the fuck I thought.”

He put me in a playful headlock, causing me to squeal.

“Stop! Look how you have me acting in here.”

He kissed his teeth. “I don’t give a damn about these people, and you know that.”

Cupping my chin, he pressed his lips to mine. When he pulled away, he stared deep into my eyes. A smile spread across his face, and it made me smile.

“Thank you,” he said.

“For?”

“For you… for this baby. For letting a nigga be himself.”

“Even if I want to choke slam you sometimes, I wouldn’t want you to be anybody else, Deucy.”

“You stay running the fuck out.”

I laughed out loud as I leaned into him and rested against his shoulder. He kissed my temple before lacing his fingers through mine. I gently rubbed my belly with my free hand. I couldn’t believe a little life was growing inside of me. I prayed that I could be even a fraction of the mother mine was to this child. I prayed that Deuce could be like my father or his. Mr. Dillinger may have womanizer ways, but one thing was for certain: he loved his children, and they all loved him.

We sat in comfortable silence until my name was called. It was like all of my nerves rushed forward at once. I took a deep breath as Deuce helped me to my feet, and we followed the nurse. After gathering my height, weight, and a urine sample to confirm my pregnancy, she led us to a room to wait for the doctor.

I had to fuss at Deuce because he kept looking through these people’s shit.

“Deuce, stop and sit down!” I said, swatting at him.

“What? I’m just looking, baby.” He pulled out a pair of forceps and held them up. “You think this baby is gonna have a big head? They might have to use this shit to get them out.”

“Put that shit down!”

He grinned as he put it back and came to sit down. No sooner than he sat did the door open and Dr. Ellis walked in. She greeted us with a smile.

“Good morning, Mommy and Daddy!” she said, beaming. “Congratulations. You are indeed pregnant.”

“Thank you. I’m so nervous. This is my first pregnancy.”

“Nerves are normal. This is a big life change. Are you ready to see your little one?”

“Very.”

She grabbed the ultrasound machine and instructed me to lie back and lift my shirt. I got comfortable on the table and did as she asked me. The next thing I felt was the cold jelly being squirted onto my stomach. She grabbed the wand and placed it on the same spot. Immediately, the screen lit up with an image.

“There he or she is! You looked to be around ten weeks.”

She pressed a button, and the most beautiful sound filled the room.

“That’s your baby’s heartbeat. Strong and healthy.”

I felt the tears rushing to my eyes. There was my baby… strong, healthy… here. I was so enthralled with the image on the screen that I didn’t even realize Deuce was next to me until he kissed my temple.

“We really made that,” he said, chuckling. “Yeah, I’m pumping about three or four more in you.”

“Stanley!” I couldn’t help but laugh when he said that, and so did Dr. Ellis.

“Somebody wants a big family,” she said.

“Somebody better put a ring on my finger before I pop out any more babies. I will not be a baby mama my whole life.”

He grabbed my hand and looked curiously at my fingers before kissing them.

“Bet.”

I wasn’t sure if he was serious, but I sure as hell was. I didn’t want kids with multiple men. I didn’t want to be somebody’s baby mama. I dreamed of being a wife. If I had to be anything else, it would be a widower because I would kill this man if he ever tried to leave me with his bad ass kids.

We were at the office for another twenty minutes with Dr. Ellis answering all my questions. After gathering our ultrasound pictures and scheduling my next appointment, we headed to the parking lot. I stared at the pictures with a smile on my face.

“We’re really having a baby,” I said, in complete awe.

“We are. I don’t know how you got that outta me. I used to be out here fucking, but I always strapped up.”

I giggled as we reached the car. Turning to him, I slid my arms around his waist, and peered up at him.

“I guess you were right,” I said. “This pussy was made for you.”

“I’m glad you know that shit.” He leaned in and pecked my lips. “Come on here. We’re gonna get my baby some real food, then I’m taking you home to practice practicing for a sibling.”

I laughed as he opened my door. What the hell was I going to do with this man?