Chapter 2

"Here you go, Rif," the bar maid said with a wink as she handed Cole his drink. "And this one is for you, Raf."

Cole Rifton, the new Duke of Hetfield, had always been best friends with Damian Rafferty, and it had been such a long time that he truly could not recall the moment everyone started referring to them as Rif and Raf. It felt like forever, and it seemed to be everyone who called them that. Even the bar staff at their favorite gentleman's club.

Usually, Cole was in such a good mood that he adored the nicknames. He liked everyone knowing who he was, but tonight, and over the last few weeks, he had been struggling to smile about anything. Having his whole life turned on its head in just one night was hard for him to come back from.

"Hey, Rif, have you been through your brother's things yet?" Damian asked as he sipped his drink. It seemed that much as Cole was trying to hide what was going on inside his mind, his best friend could sense it. Damian knew exactly what was on Cole's mind. "Have you had a chance?"

Cole's shoulders felt heavy as he shook his head no. "I cannot bring myself to do it yet. Everything has changed since Gareth and his wife died and I am merely trying to survive and get through each day." He sighed. "I was never planning on being the duke myself, that was always Gareth's job. I also never thought that I would become a parent to my nephew, but there is no one else to care for Benjamin."

It had just been a normal day, three months prior, even the weather was boring and there was nothing happening. Cole could not have been less prepared for the bomb shell that was about to drop on him.

The news that his brother, who he had always been extremely close to, and his beloved sister-in-law had been killed during a highway robbery had floored him. And at that moment, he was not even thinking of what was to come next.

He was trying his hardest to adjust to his new, very complicated life. He'd had to move out of his city apartment, back into the family home, and had been forced to take on all the responsibilities that Gareth was supposed to have,

And he honestly did not know what he would have done without Damian. Cole's best friend had been over to the house to visit almost every single day to play with Benjamin and to assist them both. By the time he really did need to go through Gareth's things, Cole knew that Damian would be there for him.

Yet even with that knowledge, Cole had not yet worked up the courage to do it.

"Perhaps you need to forget about all of this for a while," Damian offered kindly. "It has been a long time since we have let loose and had a good time. Rif and Raf have always been known for causing trouble and having a good time. Should we not do that? Maybe even tonight?"

He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, making Cole laugh a little. "I do not think tonight is a good idea."

"What excuse could you possibly have for not having fun with me tonight? I cannot think of any reason for us not to go wild."

Cole huffed once more. He had yet another task that he did not want to complete, early in the morning, but it was a necessary evil. If he did not get some help, he would not be able to handle Benjamin and do the best for him. "I have to hire a governess early tomorrow. That is something I am going to have to have a clear head for."

Thankfully, Damian nodded understandingly. "I see. I suppose you do want to have the best person in charge of your nephew. But once you get some assistance with Benjamin, surely then we can go out to have fun, right? You can finally let loose because you will have a lot less to worry about."

Cole nodded, even though he was not sure if that was the truth or not. At that point, he did not know if he would ever get back to where he could live a fun carefree life once more. That truly felt like it was well out of his reach. The moment his brother died, a part of his life died as well. Going out and letting loose with Raf did not feel like something he would ever be able to do.

He supposed he'd had six and twenty years of being carefree, and it was time to take things more seriously.

"For now, I will just have this one drink," Cole told Damian seriously. "Then we will think about having fun yet another time."

It did not take too long for Cole to finish his drink. The night was over for him, but Damian looked like he had a lot of partying left in him. So Cole said a farewell to him and climbed into the carriage to head back home. Back to his life and all of his responsibilities.

Their father only focused on teaching Gareth how to be a duke as they were growing up. He did not think that he needed to worry about Cole, which left him now with nothing to work with. He did not know a thing about being an heir to his brother's life, which only made it so much harder to do a good job. Cole wanted to make his family proud, but he was not sure how to.

Most of all, Cole wanted to raise Benjamin well. He had always adored his nephew and they got along well, but he most certainly did not know how to raise him. He wanted him to grow up a fine gentleman with all the knowledge he needed to be an adult. He wanted Benjamin to have the best life possible, especially without his parents. It was not going to be easy, but Cole was determined to do it.

The only problem was he did not know how.

With a bit of luck, this new governess would assist him in every way, helping Benjamin to smile once more.

Cole was not sure how to feel as he stepped inside his home. He felt like there were ghosts clinging to the walls, throughout the whole building. Hauntings which led him right to his brother's study. The study that also belonged to his father before he passed away too. A room that he was never supposed to inherit.

As he sat in the chair where his family sat before him, grief hit him hard. Losing his parents was one thing, but he was never supposed to lose his brother. He and Gareth were supposed to navigate life together, overcoming issues and having fun until they were old in age.

His heart felt heavy as he reached out to the desk, running his fingers over the letters and some paperwork that had been left for him to sort through. Although likely not on purpose. Seeing his father's handwriting was one thing, but having Gareth's right in front of him was quite another. Cole knew that this was something he needed to read through eventually, but he could not do it right then.

Not with tears in his eyes as the grief caught up with him.

What was that? Cole rapidly brushed the tears away as he spotted a shadow creeping across the wall. His heart skipped a beat as he tried to find the source of the movement. It was probably nothing, but the fear of haunting gripped his chest tightly.

Oh!

But it was nothing.

Benjamin sleepily padded his way through the study, which was likely something he had done a million times before, searching for his dad. Cole's heart twisted angrily as it hit him again that would never happen again.

Much as Cole was grieving the loss of his brother, and his sister-in-law too, it had to be so much worse for his nephew. In the blink of an eye, Benjamin had lost his parents in one go, which had to be devastating. At only eight years of age, how much did he even understand?

"Hey, Benji, come here," Cole said warmly, trying to hide the sadness from his voice. "I am here."

Benjamin climbed on to Cole's lap and clung to him, wrapping his arms tightly around him. "I… I had a bad dream," he muttered. "I am worried about a new governess. I want the lessons to be just the two of us. I much prefer it when it is just us."

If only this was something that Cole could do. With all of his new responsibilities, he did not have the time in the day to give to Benjamin. But this pleading really did pull at his heart strings. "You know I will be there as much as I can, Benji. I will drop in to your lessons every single day so we can learn together." He smiled reassuringly at Benjamin. "I will not pick a mean, scary old lady as your governess. I will make sure she is kind and fun to be around for you. I will ensure that she is someone that you can have a good time with."

"Are you sure?"

As Benjamin's eyes met his, Cole felt a small glimmer of happiness in the mess of the situation that he found himself in. As horrible as it was to lose his Gareth and his wife, at least he had his nephew with him. They could lean on one another somewhat.

"I am very sure. I will make sure she is someone that we both like."

Benjamin still had terror dancing in his eyes, but he nodded, trusting his uncle. Cole was well aware that he was all Benjamin had, that it was no surprise that his nephew trusted him because there was no one else. All Cole worried about was holding up his end of the bargain, making sure that Benjamin had a good life.

"Will you tell me a story?" Benjamin asked. "About my father?"

Cole was just about to tell his nephew that he would tell the story once Benjamin was back in bed, but the mention of his father tightened Cole's throat. The only way that Benji was going to learn about his father now was through Cole himself. These stories would be the only thing that kept Gareth alive.

"Well, me and my brother, your father, used to have a lot of fun in this very house when we were close to your age." Cole smiled to himself as he thought about the good times. "We used to play hide and seek out in the bushes out there. I always thought that I was so much better at the game than Gareth, until one day he hid so well that I simply could not find him. I looked for hours and hours. I even started to get worried. The last thing I wanted to do was tell our parents what had happened in case they blamed me. I convinced myself it was my fault that he had disappeared… at least until I heard him calling my name. Shouting for me, but I still could not find him. Relief quickly turned to concern when I still could not find him… but there he was, in the tree above me, teasing me from a place I could not climb to…"

Cole's words trailed off the moment he felt Benjamin slump in his arms. The boy had drifted off to sleep while Cole was telling the story. That was probably a good thing. It was far better for him to sleep than to be suffering from nightmares. But he still felt a little guilty as he carried Benjamin up the stairs to bed because he knew that it was unlikely he would ever be enough for this poor boy. He would never be his parents.

Much as he would try and do everything that he could for Benjamin, chances were he would always be sad. Always plagued by what happened.