Chapter 12

CHAPTER TWELVE

"Kitten, it's not what you think," Brandle said, his arms wrapping around me.

I swung around, striking out violently. My fist hit his throat, and he coughed and choked as he bent over. It was enough. I bolted.

Liam stepped in front of me, blocking my escape to the south. I pivoted.

Daemon blocked me to the west.

I turned again, ran past Brandle into the cottage, and slammed the door shut on them all. The bench scraped against the floor as I pulled it over to block the opening. Would it be enough? I'd witnessed their strength.

The sounds of Brandle's coughing and throat clearing continued as I sank to the floor in front of the bench. My hands shook.

Hadn't I doubted that three coincidences could bring me here? They'd been so wary of me that I never considered I should be wary of them. At least, not for magic. As men, certainly, but never once for magic.

How had I been so na?ve?

I wrapped my arms around my legs and set my forehead to my knees. Panic and fear consumed me, pulsing under my skin painfully along with the fear they all felt. It was driving me mad.

A tap came from the window. I jerked my head up and looked at Edmund.

He slowly shook his head then held up a finger. I watched as he ran it between his eyes, smoothing away the frown line there. Then he lifted his other hand and made a show of unfurling his fist.

He was right. I needed to regain control.

Dropping my head to my knees again, I focused on my breathing, calming it and my thoughts so I could think rationally.

Before I could regain control and think of a reason they'd lured me to this place, I was interrupted.

"Lamb," Daemon said from the other side of the door. "I believe we've all learned our lesson. We promise never again to kiss you without permission. Please come out."

"You don't want me to die. You don't want me to leave. What do you want, Daemon?"

"Your help, Lamb. We want your help. No, we need it."

I could feel his desperate sincerity. Was it a lie? I'd never let myself feel this openly around Maeve. If I had, what would I have felt? People could lie with their bodies, but what they felt inside rarely lied.

They truly needed my help then. But what kind? I doubted it would be anything simple with his level of desperation.

I lifted my head and saw Eadric and Liam had joined Edmund at the window. They weren't attempting to force their way in, and their expressions of sorrow matched what they felt. If they had lured me here, it wasn't for my death. What then?

"And I need fewer of you here so I can think," I said.

"Will you run, Kitten?" Brandle asked, his voice hoarse.

I closed my eyes and fought not to cry.

"Run to where, Brandle? I have nowhere to go."

"You could go home," he insisted.

"I cannot."

"If you can help us, Kitten, we vow to help you in return. I swear it on my life and the lives of my brothers. Please."

I could no longer deny I had been drawn to this glade for a reason. Were they perhaps the help I needed?

I opened my eyes to look at Eadric, Edmund, and Liam.

"And do your brothers feel the same? Do you believe they would all give their lives to help me once I've helped you?"

I could see by Edmund's expression that he'd heard me. But more than that, I could feel his agreement along with all the others.

"I do."

"Go away, Brandle. I need time to calm…my thoughts. Please."

"Do you see the locked door?" he asked. My gaze shifted to the door beside where the ladder used to be. "The key is on the ledge above it. There's a letter for you on the desk inside. Will you read it?"

Curiosity was always my downfall. I liked knowing things. My twin was no different, though a little less driven, depending on the topic. I liked all knowledge, though.

As I went to the door, the three watching me gave no outward indication of their feelings, but I felt their hope. I ran my fingers along the trim just over my head and found the key.

The door unlocked with a rusty click, and I let myself into a very narrow space. A modest desk sat below a small window. It let in enough light that I could see the dust spinning in the air from my disturbance.

I picked up the folded piece of yellowed paper from an open book on the surface of the desk.

Greetings, my dear Maiden,

It is my hope that you are reading this letter under the direction of my wards. Seven strapping lads who are in desperate need of your assistance. Something dear was taken from them, and they need your help to reclaim it.

It won't be an easy task, and I cannot give you the precise details. If I did, you would then be unable to help them. But know that these complicated circumstances are not of their choosing. They are not meant for this glade. I brought them here to give them what safety I could.

Please care for them. I vow they will return that care to you one hundredfold.

Your most humble supporter, Henry

I stopped reading the letter and looked at the books on the shelf above the window. Books on farming, healing, and several other topics rested in dusty silence, including a set of primers similar to the ones Mother had used to teach Eloise and me reading, writing, and arithmetic.

Taking one down, I opened it and found each of the men's names written neatly inside. I placed it back where I found it and glanced at the letter again. My thoughts tumbled together. I wasn't heartless to their plight, but what of my own? Did my troubles have no meaning in the light of theirs? Neatly refolding the letter, I returned it to its resting place.

When I turned toward the door, I saw the wall behind it was filled with shelves that housed more books. Many of them had no titles written on their spines. Among those were books titled with economics, ethics, mining, and masonry.

Henry, the man I'd heard them mention many times, had been a very knowledgeable man.

I looked back at the book on the desk and moved closer to wipe the dust off the page.

It was a spell to protect the glade from the beasts…written in the same penmanship as the letter. I read it closely, including the warnings for safety if it should ever need to be recast. It had aged Henry twenty years.

With a frown, I turned the pages. Henry had been a caster. A strong one based on the spells he'd noted. Spells for protecting people from being watched. Spells for protecting against magic. With each protection spell I read, I began to calm.

I found one with a spell for protection amulets. It wouldn't allow any spell—good or bad—to touch the wearer. It would glow blue. The spell went on to explain the different types of amulets that were possible, including one that could store life energy, which glowed green.

A tear slowly slid down my cheek. The men here were nothing like Maeve then. Henry, the man who I believed had raised them, had protected them in the best way he was able. I thought of how Eadric had clutched at his shirt when I'd suggested removing it so long ago. They'd been afraid I would discover their protection.

Afraid of me.

Wiping away the tear, I pushed the rest of my emotions back into the well where they belonged.

What the brothers outside felt, along with the persistent tingle crawling under my skin, faded away.

I turned the page back to the spell for the glade and left the room. The door to the cottage stood open. I could see them all waiting for me just outside.

Silent. Watchful. Worried.

"Was magic used to bring me here?" I asked.

"If it was, it wasn't done by us," Brandle said.

"Was it done by someone you know?"

"Not by our knowledge."

"Or with our consent," Garron added.

I inched closer to the door.

"Don't shut us out," Edmund said.

I ignored him and focused on Eadric.

"What did you make for breakfast?" I asked.

He looked surprised and glanced at Darian, who stood beside him.

"We'll make you anything you'd like," Darian said.

"I want pastries like I used to eat at home," I said without hesitation.

"Then you shall have them," Brandle said. "In exchange for sending us away to obtain the ingredients we need, will you please come outside first?"

Damn him for guessing my intent.

"Why?"

"To bid farewell to whoever leaves."

He made me want to stomp my foot. Why was he so stubborn?

"Ah, Lamb, you break my heart when you look at us with those eyes," Daemon said.

I tore my gaze from Brandle to meet Daemon's.

"And how should I view you?"

"Preferably without any cloth—" Garron's elbow jab to Darian's ribs cut his remark short, but not his lazy smile.

"Fine. I'll come out and bid you all farewell so I can have a day of peace."

"Two will need to stay behind," Brandle said.

"So be it. Do I have the freedom to choose who is leaving, or am I not allowed that either?"

Brandle looked down, and I could see he was struggling not to show how much my words hurt him. That, in turn, created an ache in my chest. I didn't want to hurt him. I didn't want to hurt any of them. Yet, my continued presence and their persistence to keep it would do just that. Why couldn't they see I was trying to protect us all?

"You can choose," Brandle said.

"Eadric and Edmund then." Before any of them could respond, I added, "And if I help you, do I have your word that you will do as I ask, regardless of the risk to me, even if what I ask is to reach Adele to secure the help I need to free my family?" I waited for my throat to hurt, but the curse found no issue with saying family. After all, my father was cursed and my family. It didn't incriminate Maeve or what she'd done to bind Eloise to our home.

"You have our word," Brandle said.

"Very well." Vowing to do nothing to cause me to regret my choice, I stepped outside.

Darian caught me up in a hug. I didn't miss the way his head dipped toward my shoulder as he held me tightly. My heart beat painfully at the proximity of his mouth to my chest, and I was already regretting my vow.

"Get off me before I unman you, Darian."

He chuckled and released me with a quick step backward.

"That is how we bid a proper farewell, Princess. An embrace."

Understanding what he meant, my gaze swept over them.

"All of you?" I asked.

"Except Eadric and Edmund," Brandle said.

"Why should I embrace any of you farewell when I didn't even do so to my sister when I left home?" It was technically true, though I had hugged her the prior day.

"We risk our lives each time we leave. It may be the last embrace we ever know."

"If an embrace is too much," Daemon said with a grin, "I'm willing to accept a kiss in its place."

"I believe I've been kissed enough."

"For the morning or the day?" Darian asked. "We need to know how to greet you when we return."

"Silently and without any physical contact," I said, turning to Garron.

He flushed when I stepped close and gently hugged him, careful to avoid where he'd been stitched.

"Return safely," I said.

His arms snapped around me, and he leaned in to press his face against my neck. I felt him breathe in deeply, and a different type of awareness rushed through me. Our faces were equally flushed when he released me.

Liam was next. His gaze danced with anticipation, and I understood why when he set his ear to my breast.

"I have never before appreciated my lack of height as much as in this moment," he said.

"Be careful," Brandle said. "She kicks, hits, and likely bites."

"Please, brother," Darian said. "Stop teasing me with these possibilities."

I heard someone cuff Darian as Liam released me.

Reluctantly, I turned to Daemon.

He opened his arms wide and grinned shamelessly. "Come, Lamb. Show me how much you care for my well-being?"

Face flaming and heart stuttering, I walked into his embrace. He dipped his head to rest it on my shoulder, and I felt his lips brush my neck.

I dug my fingers into his hair and pulled his head back forcefully. He quickly released me and held up his hands in surrender.

"No kissing," I said, pushing him away by his hair.

"Sorry, Lamb," he said, looking completely unrepentant as he smoothed his hair back into place. "You're so soft and smell nice. It's hard to resist showing my affection for you."

"Resist, or receive nothing the next time."

"Understood, Lamb."

Reluctantly, I turned toward Brandle.

He flashed me a small smile. "I was paid in advance and will not ask for more. We will return before nightfall."

I felt an ache in my chest as I watched them leave.

"He has mastered how to incite guilt, hasn't he?" I asked Eadric, who now stood beside me.

"He has," he agreed.

"Guilt about what?" Edmund asked from my other side.

"Not embracing him farewell. Dratted man."

I turned on my heel and would have strode back inside, but my shift caught on something. When I turned to look, I saw it caught between Edmund's fingers.

"How are your hands?" he asked before I could become angry. "Can you make a fist without pain?"

Curious, I tried. "It aches, but it's bearable."

He shook his head and released me.

"It's best not to use them, but there are still some moves I can show you if you're interested."

"Moves?"

"How to strike someone if your hands don't work."

"Edmund, I don't think Brandle wants her to?—"

"Hush," I said. "Why do Brandle's wants come before mine? I want to learn. I like learning."

I hurried to follow Edmund to the packed ground. He turned toward me, took in my shift, and shook his head again.

"It would be better if you dressed in the tunic and pants for this. You'll likely want to sleep in that tonight, and it will be dirty."

I nodded and eagerly went inside to change. I could hear the indistinct murmur of their conversation and knew I couldn't dally, or Eadric would convince Edmund he was doing something his brothers wouldn't like.

With my pants loosely tied and my tunic almost slipping off my shoulder, I jogged outside in my untied boots.

"Eadric, will you help me?" I asked, forcing him to stop his whispered conversation with Edmund.

Eadric took one step forward then retreated with a worried glance at Edmund.

Edmund snorted and strode toward me.

"After Brandle's talk about touching you inappropriately, Eadric's worried about scaring you off."

"And being hit," Eadric added as Edmund quickly and efficiently tied my pants and boots. When he stood and reached for my tunic, his hand trembled slightly.

"Is that due to anger or fear?" I asked.

"Neither. Or perhaps a little of both. I'm trying not to overthink things."

"That sounds very much like my sister. I prefer to contemplate things carefully."

He finished with the tie and stepped back.

"The letter I read said that I should help you but clearly stated that telling me how would negate any help I might give. So, I won't ask. But how am I to know when I'm being helpful or a nuisance?"

"Trust us to speak up when it's the latter and remain silent when it's the former."

"I thought as much," I said as I followed him back to Eadric.

I spent the morning learning how to use my forearm instead of my palm to break a man's nose. The new technique delighted me, which seemed to concern both Eadric and Edmund.

We took a small break to eat some of the previous night's soup then went to turn over the soil in the garden that hadn't yet been turned. As I watched them work, I asked questions.

"If you can't tell me how to help you, how am I supposed to know what to do?"

"Just keep doing what you've been doing," Edmund said.

"Provoking you and annoying your brothers?"

Eadric flashed a grin at me, but neither answered. Of course they didn't. That would be entirely too helpful to me.

"Will whatever task that's needed take a long time to complete?" I asked.

"Hard to say," Edmund said.

I made a face at him.

"Eadric, you should push him into the dirt."

He pretended like he was going to but didn't.

"How will I know when I've helped you?" I asked.

"You'll know," Eadric said.

"I'd like to help quickly. Can you give me hints?"

Edmund paused what he was doing and leaned on the end of the gardening stick as he considered me.

"A hint is just a segment of explanation. With enough of them, we would be telling you what you would need to do, and that would invalidate everything you have already done."

So I'd already helped? How?

Taking his warning to heart, I didn't ask.

"Will my bed be on the table again tonight?" I asked instead.

Edmund looked a little surprised by the question and then suspicious.

"Why do you ask?"

I shrugged and didn't answer.

"Did you hate sleeping outside?" Eadric asked.

"No. Not even a little. I liked the fresh air and seeing the stars."

"But not the company?" Edmund asked.

"I didn't mind Garron. He kept his hands to himself." I fought not to recall how I'd been unable to do the same.

"Darian and Daemon did as well, Sparrow," Eadric said without censure.

I felt my face heat.

"They didn't mind that your hands wandered, though," he added quickly.

"Shut it, Eadric," Edmund said without sounding angry.

"But she looks upset by what I said."

"Which is why I told you to stop talking," Edmund said, shooting Eadric a warning look.

Eadric sidestepped until he was close to me.

"Do you still remember that elbow thrust?" he asked from the side of his mouth.

He was so innocently mischievous that I couldn't help my smile.

"I do," I said. "I promise to intervene if Edmund begins to look like he wants to deliver a cuffing."

Eadric grinned widely and pulled me into his arms for a hug.

I wrapped my arms around him and returned it willingly.

"If I get to choose my sleeping partners tonight, I'll make sure to choose you for your safety," I said.

He laughed and pulled back from me.

"Hear that, Edmund? I get to sleep next to my little sparrow tonight."

"Maybe I'll knock you out on your way to the privy and pretend to be you," Edmund said. And then he shot me the most ridiculous, Eadric-like smile and added, "Are you hungry, Sparrow?"

He sounded just like Eadric.

Eadric's nervous gaze met mine.

"We'll escort each other to the privy tonight, right?" he asked.

I laughed so hard that I snorted.