4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Declan

M alcolm walks into my back yard like he owns the place. It doesn’t bother me since I’m used to it, but sometimes, when I’m just wading in my pool, minding my own business, a heads-up phone call would be nice. All my family has a code to get into my house and my gates, so I’m a sitting duck. But, then again, we’re all sitting ducks, since we all have access to each other’s places, as per da’s insistence. “Hey, man. Is your phone off?”

“It’s probably dead. I’ve been in here a while.” I reply, looking at my waterlogged fingers.

“Uncle Dougall is having a shit.”

I chuckle mirthlessly. “Why. Can’t a man take a swim without having to post it on social media?”

“He’s not having a shit on you, man. He’s wigging out on Maverick.”

“How come?” I ask, wishing like hell that he’ll get to the point, so I can do some laps.

“He found out that Maverick set you up with that lady whose da is a fucking murderer.”

My feet find the floor of the pool, and I stand upright. My voice is flat in disbelief. “You’re fucking kidding me.”

He shakes his head. “No, man. It all came out when they went at it over the lass nearly getting shot. Da tore his head off because he told him to take security off her. He also found out about the two-bit security guy that Maverick didn’t bother to check out first. Turns out her da wasn’t just questioned, man.”

I find my way to the side of the pool, resting my hands on the deck. “What are you talking about?”

“The dude’s behind bars. Da fired the new guy. Almost backhanded him, actually. He just about took a round out of Maverick, too. It’s just thank God that the old dude shot that motherfucker Mike, because if Trudy died, I think that your da would have fucking killed Maverick, too.”

“Back up, Malcolm. What do you mean he’s behind bars?”

“He’s not convicted yet, but he’s in custody, and from what I understand, he’s fucking desperate. The asshole is in the poorhouse. Apparently, he lost all his money trying to pay some son of a bitch to off someone, and the plan went belly up, and buddy ended up in jail. They’re just trying to build a case against him, but his darling daughter is a key witness, and she won’t testify against the guy who offed the other dude for her father, so her da’s on the fucking chopping block.”

It all starts to make sense. “And that’s why she fled. That’s why she moved to the states.”

He nods. “Bingo.”

“But I don’t understand why she won’t testify if it means setting her da free.”

He shrugs. “Your guess is as good as mine, dude. All I know is that Uncle Dougall is having a shit right now, because he knows that you went out with her, without his knowledge or consent. You know how your da is when he’s not kept abreast of shit, man.”

I swallow, eyes fixed on a spot in the grass. “Yeah, well, it doesn’t matter, anyway, Malcolm. I’m not seeing her again.”

He rises from his knees, where he was squatting to talk to me up close. He goes to sit inside the gazebo, mere feet from me. I feel a twinge of worry, as I recall not having checked to make sure that nothing was amiss from this afternoon. As he sits, he leans sideways, and pulls something out from the side of the cushion. When he lifts it in the air, I lower my head onto the concrete deck in defeat. “Fuck.”

He chuckles. “This what I think it is, man?”

I lift my head. “What the fuck do you think, stupid.”

“Well, I’d say that she left quite an impression on you, lad...and she left her bra, too.”

“Fuckoff.” I pull myself out of the pool, dripping all over the deck, and as I walk towards him, aiming to snatch her bra out of his filthy hands, I see another piece of evidence outside of the pool house. Her ripped panties.

“And what the fuck is that?” He laughs out loud as we both see it at the same time.

“Not seeing her again, huh.” He laughs. “At least she left you with enough to remember her by.”

“I said fuckoff, Malcolm.” I warn, ripping the bra from his grasp, and then leaning down to pick up her panties off the ground. “You tell anyone about this and you’ll die with these both shoved down your fucking throat.”

He lifts both hands in mock defense. “Hey, your secret is safe with me, man. But I don’t get how you’re never going to see her again, if you two did the deed on the first date.”

“It’s easy, Malcolm. It’s called casual sex. Ever heard of it?” My irritation is evident in my voice.

“Well, I have, dude. But I know for a fact that that’s not your style.”

“Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t. It doesn’t matter. I’m not seeing her again, so you can forget everything that we’ve discussed here.”

“Is this your doing or hers?”

I round on him. “What the fuck does it matter! I said I’m not seeing her again and I mean it!”

“Hey, take it easy.” He lifts his hands again. “I’m just saying that maybe you can find out from the horse’s mouth what her story is. Sure, Uncle Dougall had a shit and pulled everyone off Nathan Mackenzie watch, but that doesn’t mean that they know the whole story.”

Her bra and panties get thrown into the pool house and I shut the door. “Well, that’s as sexy as hell, Malcolm. Oh, hey, Moira, can I see you again? But this time it isn’t to fuck you, it’s just to be a fucking weisenheimer and ask you about your da that’s behind fucking bars! How do you think that shit’s going to do down, Malcolm!”

He shrugs. “Declan, I don’t know, man, but it’s sure better than never seeing her again. You’ve got to at least try.”

“What the fuck for? I’ve already violated her privacy...twice! Do you think that she’s going to trust me?”

“You don’t have to tell her that you know.”

“And how do you suggest I broach the subject, dickwad? Ask her to introduce me to the motherfucker?! We just met! It doesn’t work that way, asshole!”

“I’m not saying that you should suggest marriage, stupid.” He’s irritated now. “But it isn’t against the rules to ask about her family. Everyone on the planet knows that you’re so close to yours that you can smell us in every fucking room. And, besides, how do you know that she’ll be pissed, anyway? Anyone with half a business sense sniffs around everybody these days, man. It isn’t unheard of, Declan.”

“Malcolm, she’s a gynecologist. The only sniffing around she does...oh, fuckoff, never mind!”

He starts to laugh. I’m deciding whether I want to be irritated or if what I just said was a little bit funny. His face changes. He’s levelling with me. Malcolm knows when it’s time to fuck around and when it’s time to get down to business. That’s why my da groomed him like us and hired him when he finished university. “Look, Declan. This isn’t the end of the world, man. The way I see it, your da’s always pissed at somebody for something. And he’s more pissed at Maverick right now, not you.”

“But he will be if I go out with her again.” I counter.

“Not if you find out something that’s...noteworthy. Like, say her da’s a dirtbag, and she left Scotland because she didn’t want to help him? Like she wanted him to fry in jail. If that’s the truth, then you know as well as I do that Uncle Dougall would have an army of eyes protecting her, just like he did with Trudy.”

I swallow, thinking over his logic for a moment. “But she doesn’t want to see me again, Malcolm. She made no move towards it at all.”

“So, you make a move, man. Don’t be a pussy. You know you liked her. I know that you didn’t just fuck her to fuck her. That’s not your style. I know it and you know it.” He puts his hand on my forearm. “I won’t say a word about any of this shit, but only if you promise me that you’ll do this.”

I draw in a deep breath. “Look, I’m not promising anything.” I tell him calmly. “But I will reach out to her, if nothing else, to give her her bra and panties back.” I say with a smirk.

“Attaboy.” He nudges me with his elbow.

After the first call from da, that I dodge, I decide that the only way out of this, is to take it head on, and speak to Moira directly. I figure it can go down one of two ways. Either she shows me the door and tells me to get the fuck out, both for violating her privacy, and for violating her after violating her privacy, or she comes clean and tells me the truth, giving me a chance to explain why I did what I did. But since I’ve already lied to her, I’m feeling much trepidation as I walk up to her house.

Knowing full well that she’s going to know that I nosed through her personal information to find out her address, and that I paid the security guard a handsome sum to let me in, I might as well walk in with my tail between my legs. Guests in this building need to be announced, and I clearly failed to do that. As I knock on her door, I already feel defeated. After a beat, she opens the door. The first thing that comes out of my mouth is. “You have to move, lass. The security here is shit.”

Stunned isn’t the word to describe the look on her face. “What...how did you...what?”

I let her off the hook. “I’ve got something to tell you, Moira. And it needed to be done in person. Can I come in?”

Her step inside the apartment is her answer. She’s changed out of the dress that she was wearing earlier. It’s late, but she’s not in pajamas, rather, some sort of a jumpsuit, like she’s been working out. “Sure, Declan. You look like hell.”

I want to tell her that she looks so fucking cute I could take her again, but I don’t. Her jumpsuit is powder pink, and it’s short in the legs, with an attached tank top above. It looks like something that she’d have to remove completely if she needed to relieve herself or do...other things. “I paid your security guard fifty bucks to let me in without calling you first. That’s ass, Moira. Anybody could get in here.”

Her face changes, like she’s now worried about that. “I’ll take that into consideration. I’m on the board of directors here.”

A glance around tells me that she’s living modestly. It’s a small apartment, with one floor and one bedroom, and just a small kitchenette. The fireplace is impressive, though, and the decor is very smart for such a small place. “It’s not much, but the pool is fantastic, and it’s five minutes from work. Also, the view is spectacular at night. I’ve never lived in an apartment before. I love being this high up. It sort of makes me feel...hidden. Like nobody would be able to see me at this height.”

I decide now is as good a time as any. “I know why you’re hiding, Moira.” My tone is apologetic, trite.

Her gaze goes to the floor after a beat, like she was mulling something over in her mind, before reacting. “I admit I’m a bit of a fool here, Declan. Of course you would know. Your family probably doesn’t mix with anyone that they don’t know everything about first.”

“While that’s true, I’m also sorry for violating your privacy, Moira. I wanted to tell you, but I felt like a shit.” I say slowly.

“So, why are you coming to me now, Declan? If you knew...what you know. I’m sure that there’s a price to be paid for that.”

“And you’re wondering if you’re worth it.” I surmise. She swallows, head bobbing up and down in assent. I take a step towards her and lift her chin with my hand. “I wouldn’t be here if you weren’t, lass. But I also came to apologize.” I say. I want to also add ‘and to find out the truth’, but I don’t believe in counting my chickens. If she wants to share, she will, otherwise, I’m being outright daft just coming out and asking her.

“You were just doing your job, Declan. You don’t need to apologize.” She states. “But you’re taking a huge risk coming here, clearly.”

“Why do you say that?”

She walks into her living room and sits down on the couch, effectively inviting me to do the same. “Well, clearly your family knows about us. And if I’m off bounds, then you’re going to take some heat for coming here, if you haven’t already taken heat for bringing me back to your place today.”

“I never said that you’re off bounds.”

She scoffs. “Then you don’t know what you think you know, Declan. Either that or you’re going against your da and your family to come here.”

“Actually, I’m dodging my da’s calls at the moment, but he’ll understand why.”

“Look, Declan, I’m not worth the risk, okay? Not until things settle down.”

“If I waited for things to settle down in my life, lass, I’d never get a thing done and I’d be nobody and have nothing.”

Her gaze goes to the sliding glass doors outside. “I’m doing this for your benefit, Declan. My life may turn ugly. I don’t want anyone to suffer for it.”

“Lass, the only person that stands to turn ugly is my da, and I can handle him.” And then I stop myself. What am I thinking? This lass is liable to ditch me like the last one did. Wait until the going gets tough, and then start stringing me along, like I’m a lost fucking puppy, only to tell me that she really didn’t feel it for me, anyway. That she just went along for the ride, since, evidently my ride is more glamorous than most. I pull back. “But, maybe you’re right. Maybe this isn’t the time.”

“I think that’s right, Declan. You seem like such a wonderful man. I’d hate to be the cause of any of your pain. Now or in the future.”

My da once said to me that true love is about sacrificing your needs for someone else’s. It’s about putting your heart into someone, knowing that you’re doing it unselfishly, doing it just for them, because it means more to you to see that person happy, than it is to do anything else, for yourself. Their happiness effectively means your happiness. Those words have never rung truer to me than now. I’m not saying that Moira loves me, but what I am saying is that she’s being completely selfless. She could easily draw me into her world, knowing the risks, but instead she’s putting me first.

“That’s...kind of you, lass.” I say fairly. “Is there anything that I can do to help?”

Her eyes search mine. I can tell that she’s wanted to hear those words from someone for a long time. “Not right now, Declan. Right now, it’s just a hiding and a waiting game.”

I hesitate to ask. “Are you waiting to go back to Scotland?”

She shakes her head no emphatically. “No. Not to stay, anyway. It’s...not safe. Not right now.”

I draw in a deep breath and let it out slowly, as I reach for her cheek. “Well, if there’s anything that I can do, please let me know.”

And I’m about to leave, but something stops me.