Chapter 15

CHAPTERFIFTEEN

“Moooom, I don’t want to go to camp!” Jasna whined for what seemed like the hundredth time. “I want to stay here with you and Finn. Alaska said they’re having another bonfire and I don’t want to miss it! Besides, I love my new room, and we’re supposed to get those boxes of books we ordered from that used bookstore out in California that was going out of business.”

“No,” Henley said, her tone more patient than she felt.

“Why are you so mean?” Jasna exclaimed petulantly.

Henley sighed and did her best to control her temper. She wasn’t surprised her sweet kid was finally turning into a hormonal pre-teen, had long been expecting it, but that didn’t mean she hadn’t hoped it wouldn’t happen. She turned from Finn’s sink to face her daughter. He’d gone down to the barn to feed the animals, then he’d be back to drive her and Jasna into town. They’d drop her off at camp and he’d take Henley to her office.

“You were excited about going to this particular camp a couple of months ago, what happened? And Sharyn is going to be there, so it’s not like you won’t know anyone.”

“I know, but I’d rather be here. Scarlet Pimpernickel might forget about me, and the kittens are starting to play all the time, and it’s so cool to sleep here with Finn and I just don’t want to go anymore!”

“It’s only four nights,” Henley said. “Your calf isn’t going to forget about you. And the kittens will still want to play when you get back. There will be other bonfires, and Finn isn’t going anywhere.”

Jasna sighed dramatically and plopped herself down at Finn’s small table.

Henley went over and sat across from her daughter and said gently, “Do you want to tell me what’s really bothering you?”

It took a long moment, but Jasna finally said, “I just really like Finn. He’s patient and nice, and he treats me like I’m an adult. I mean, he doesn’t treat me as if I’m a little kid. He lets me do some hard stuff with the animals and trusts me to do them right. I’m afraid if I’m gone too long, something will happen between you guys and you’ll break up and I won’t get to spend any more time here.”

Henley frowned. She’d moved so fast with Finn, she had some of the same worries as her daughter. That if things didn’t work out, Jasna would suffer for it. She’d become attached to him very quickly, and it made Henley sick inside to know that her actions might harm her daughter.

“I don’t know what’s in store for the future,” she said after a moment. “I wish I could sit here and tell you that Finn and I are going to be together forever. That we’ll get married and live happily ever after. But I know better than most people that we can’t predict the future. What I can tell you is that no matter what happens between Finn and I…you will always be welcome here at The Refuge. He enjoys spending time with you, and everyone else here does too.”

Jasna sighed dramatically.

“I love Finn,” Henley blurted. “He makes me happy. But more than that, I love how he makes you feel. And you already know I would do almost anything for you. I’d move heaven and earth to make you happy. To give you everything you need to grow up to be a well-adjusted, happy woman who’s self-confident and knows her own worth. But as much as I enjoy hanging out with you, and spending all our free time together, you need to be out there having fun and forming relationships with kids your own age, as well. I know you’re going to have a great time at camp, and when you get back, you’ll see that nothing has changed.”

“Whatever,” Jasna muttered.

It was Henley’s turn to sigh. She’d hoped her little pep talk would snap her daughter out of the funk she was in. “Are you all packed?” she asked.

“Yeah.”

“Did you put the sunscreen I gave you into your bag last night?”

“Yes, Mom. Jeez,” Jasna said then stood, the chair screeching on the wooden floor as she did. She flounced down the hall toward her room, and Henley winced when her bedroom door slammed a little too hard behind her.

“That was intense,” a deep voice said from the direction of the front door.

Spinning in her chair, Henley saw Finn standing just inside the cabin. She’d been so focused on Jasna, she hadn’t seen or heard him enter. “How much did you hear?” she asked with a frown, realizing what she’d said there toward the end.

In response, Finn pushed off the doorframe and stalked toward her. Henley remained sitting, trying to read the emotions she saw swirling in his eyes.

When he reached the table, he went down on his knees beside her and swiveled her legs around so he was kneeling between them. He stared at her for a long beat.

Then asked, “You love me?”

Shit, shit, shit. Her mouth dry, Henley desperately licked her lips.

She could play it off, tell Finn she was simply trying to make her daughter feel better. Admit that she knew it was too early in their relationship to be saying things like that. Even make a joke out of it. But she didn’t want to do any of that.

So, she simply said, “Yes.”

To her surprise—and alarm—tears formed in his eyes.

“Finn?”

“On that boat all those years ago, I thought my life was over. I vowed to never get so attached ever again, to beast or human, so no one could hurt me like that a second time by hurting anyone I loved. I care about the animals here at The Refuge, and it would suck if anything happened to them, but I’ve managed to keep my emotions locked down inside me. Over the last two years, you’ve snuck behind my walls. And now?” He tapped his chest, over his heart. “You’re in there, Henley. You and your daughter.”

She waited for him to say more, but he didn’t.

“Does that mean you love me too?”

He chuckled and shut his eyes for a second, then opened them again. “Figures I’d screw this up. Yes, Henley. I love you. I love you so damn much. And for the record, you can sit there and say that we’ll be together forever, that we’re going to get married and live happily ever after.”

“Finn,” she whispered, overwhelmed.

“The two of us have been to hell and back, and somehow we found each other and ended up here. I’m not going to let anyone or anything mess with what’s between us. I’m in this for the long haul. How many beds for teenagers do you think I’ve bought in my lifetime?”

Henley smiled. “Um…one?”

“Exactly.”

“I’m so happy with you, Finn. But also scared something’s gonna happen to make this all seem like a dream.”

“It won’t. Because we’ve got each other. We’ll weather every storm thrown our way. Are things always going to be easy? No. Jasna’s almost a teenager, and I think judging by her outburst just now, we can assume things will be rocky from time to time over the next few years. But we love her, and she loves us…we’ll figure it out. You’ve got your job, and I’ve got mine. We’ll have to work hard to carve out time for the two of us, but I’m willing to do whatever it takes, including take on whoever Brick wants to hire to help out at the barn.”

Henley smiled at that. She knew Finn wasn’t thrilled about having someone else in “his” domain, but the fact that he was willing to get help so he could spend more time with her was sweet.

“You want me to go check on Jas?” he asked.

“You don’t mind?” Henley asked.

“Of course not.”

“Then yes. Please. We need to get going in the next twenty minutes or so if we’re going to be on time.”

“All right. And for the record…when I pick you up later this afternoon, we’re going to come straight back here, and neither of us is leaving until the morning.”

She grinned. “That sounds perfect.” And it did. She and Jasna had been sleeping in Finn’s cabin at The Refuge for the last few days, and she loved sleeping in his arms, but she was anxious to do more than sleep. They’d been very cautious, since staying at the cabin was so new and the last thing either of them wanted was for Jasna to hear them or—God forbid—catch them making love.

“If someone had asked me even six months ago to tell them one good thing that came out of Steel being killed in front of my eyes, I would’ve told them ‘nothing’. That there wasn’t a single good thing that could ever come out of my best friend being murdered. But now? I’m beginning to think Steel led me to you.”

Finn stood then, leaning over and kissing Henley so deeply, if she had any doubts about how he felt, she didn’t now.

He ran a finger down her cheek, then turned to head down the hall toward Jasna’s room.

* * *

Tonka wanted to beat his chest and shout to the world that Henley loved him. He hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, but he also hadn’t wanted to interrupt her conversation with Jasna. And when he’d heard her say that she loved him, he’d stopped breathing. For a moment, he thought he’d misheard her, that he was simply hearing what he wanted to, but the more she spoke, the more he believed she really did love him.

After Jas had gone to her room, Tonka hadn’t been able to stop himself from going to Henley.

She loved him.

It was going to take some time to let that sink in.

His resolve to keep them both safe strengthened. Not that they were in any danger, but he hadn’t thought he’d been in any danger when he’d stepped on that boat years ago.

When the three of them were finally on their way into town, Tonka made a split-second decision. He’d been thinking a lot about his conversation with Raiden, and figured now was the perfect time for him to share what he wanted to do.

“Jas?” he asked as they drove.

“Yeah?” she replied sullenly.

“I was thinking…maybe this weekend, after you get home from camp, we could go to the shelter and see if there are any dogs who need a good home.”

As soon as the words left his mouth, Tonka realized he should’ve talked about this with Henley before he’d mentioned it to Jasna. But it was too late now.

“Really? Oh my God! Yes! Are you serious? Mom? We can really get a dog?” The pre-teen’s grumpy attitude had disappeared in an instant.

Tonka could feel Henley’s gaze on him, but he resolutely kept his eyes on the road. He heard her sigh slightly before she spoke.

“Yes. But it’s going to be your responsibility.”

“No problem!” Jasna reassured her.

“I mean it. I’ll buy the food, but you’ll have to feed it and walk it. And pick up poop. And when it chews up your shoes and eats your favorite stuffed animal, you can’t get mad.”

“I know! I will and I won’t!” she said.

“Finn has enough on his plate, and you’ll have to train it not to spook the animals at the barn. If you don’t take care of it, it’ll go right back to the shelter.”

“Mom! I said I’ll be responsible for him or her. I wonder what kind of dogs they have?” she asked, more to herself than to either Tonka or her mom.

He risked glancing over at Henley. She raised a brow when she saw him looking at her, and he did his best to give her an apologetic look. He was sure she’d have plenty to say to him after they saw her daughter off.

Jasna talked nonstop the rest of the trip to the outdoor camp on the outskirts of Los Alamos. The cabins were surrounded by trees, much like those at The Refuge. But there was also a manmade lake nearby where the kids could swim, tube, and kayak. Henley had done a lot of research on the place. Their safety rating was excellent and the reviews had mostly been positive.

Jasna was still chattering about what kind of dog she was going to get and how it would sleep with her and follow her everywhere. The second she saw Sharyn, she gave her mom a quick distracted hug, waved at Tonka, then rushed off to tell her friend the good news about her upcoming dog adoption.

“I’m sorry,” Tonka said the second Jas was out of earshot. “It just kind of popped out. I hated seeing her so grumpy.”

“You’re going to spoil her. And you know we’re going to end up taking care of the mutt, right?”

“Yup,” he said with a smile.

Henley gave him some side-eye. “Which is what you really want, isn’t it?”

Tonka shrugged. “I’ve thought a lot about my talk with Raid. He has a bloodhound, said it’s helped his recovery. And I…I wouldn’t mind having a dog around again. But not a working dog. A pet. I want one that will be playful, but also protective of you and Jas. I’m hoping they have a couple of pitties we can choose from. They’re generally very loving dogs, but the sight of one alone would make people think twice about messing with you or Jasna.”

Henley smiled slightly and rolled her eyes. She didn’t seem mad, which was a relief.

“Come on, the faster I get you to work, the quicker I’ll be able to pick you up and the sooner I’ll have you to myself,” Tonka said as he took her elbow in his hand and turned her back to his truck.

As they pulled out of the parking lot, neither Tonka nor Henley noticed the nondescript older-model sedan sitting in the back of the lot, with a teenager wearing sunglasses sitting behind the wheel.