44. Derek

CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR

Derek

I 've done a lot of really dumb shit in my life. But as I stand here while a guy Indy's age continues to double and triple-check our harnesses, I can't seem to remember any that are as dumb as what I'm doing right now. I look at Indy's massive smile and shit, I guess if I die today, at least I die holding her. But I swear to god I'll tell her I told her so if we die.

"Alright," the guy smiles. "You're good to go. Get on out there and hug each other. Don't go over until we give the go-ahead.

I bark out a laugh. "Yeah, no worries there." Indy looks up at me, her blue eyes sparkling in the setting sun.

"This is going to be so amazing!" She cheers, and I smile at her, though I'm sure I'm going to shit myself and die. We lean over the edge, holding onto each other as instructed. I should've told her my feelings and gave her the damn thing first before the fucking death jump. Now we may never make it to the starlit picnic.

The guy holds us as we lean over the edge, and I know Indy can feel my rapidly beating heart because she looks up at me and smiles. "Don't worry. I'm with you." That shouldn't relax me, but it somehow does. At least, until the guy lets go and Indy and I plummet toward the Earth. I want to scream, but my voice is caught in my fucking throat, my stomach has fallen out of my asshole, and I might be pissing myself. Indy, however, is squealing with delight because, well… I'm in love with a goddamn psycho. I planned to do another thing on her "Not Bucket List," followed by dinner under the stars. I didn't foresee her saying tandem bungee jumping.

I feel the bungee cord pull, and all I can do is hold her tighter as we bounce and fly back up before falling again.

"Isn't this the most amazing feeling?" She yells, and all I want to do is cry, vomit, and lay flat on solid ground.

"It's amazing!" I lie, which causes her to laugh. I watch as she grabs my neck and pulls my lips to hers. She slips her tongue into my mouth, and I groan. Focusing on her mouth while we bounce and sway is so fucking hot, and I'm suddenly very much enjoying this jump.

"No," I growl out while taking a bite of the pizza we ordered from a pizza place that I've never been to and didn't watch the people make. Yeah, big changes happening. She cackles, and I watch her throw her head back, her beautiful features dancing in the candlelight as we sit in the back of Fox's pickup truck that I borrowed for our date, but only after swearing I wouldn't defile it like Atlas and Ren did.

"It would be fun!" she teases, and I shake my head.

"I did one death jump. I'm not doing another. Especially from a plane." She laughs again as she looks up at the sky.

"Well then, I'll take that one off if I can add a different one."

"Oh? And what's that?" I ask, taking a sip of my water.

"I want another tattoo from you." My mouth twitches, and I look up at the sky.

"Uh-huh," I mutter while rolling my head to look at her. "We can talk about that," I say, though at this point I would give her anything she asks for, including jumping out of a plane. She grins as she crawls over and kisses my jaw before moving down my neck.

"Indy," I moan, feeling her delicate hand slipping down my torso. "Darlin', hang on," I say, grabbing her wrist softly. I move us so we are facing each other as I reach for my backpack, pulling out the object that has been screaming at me for a while to give to her.

"Indy," I breathe out, god I'm fucking terrified. Fuck, I would take the bungee jump again over this nervousness. All I can think is, what if she says no? What if she doesn't feel the same? Shaking those dark thoughts out of my mind, I look back at her. She's beautiful by the warm glow of the candle. "You came into my life and completely tore it apart. I had schedules, routines, boundaries, and walls, and you systemically knocked them all down. You changed my furniture, burned my meals, made my house smell like candles, and washed your underwear with mine." Indy furrows her brow while cocking her head to the side.

"Sorry?" she laughs, and I shake my head.

"No, don't be. Because the times I've been without you since, I eat less of my meals, I burn your candles, and I try to find your scent. It made me realize that I wasn't living a "safe life." I existed in a darkness that I had allowed to consume me for years. You pulled me out of that darkness and into your light. You have made me feel happier and more at peace than I ever remember feeling before." I grab her hand in mine as I take another deep breath. "Indy, I'm completely and utterly in love with you."

The candlelight dances over her falling tears as she looks at me. Her bottom lip quivers, and I see she's about to speak, but I stop her. Turning, I reach over and grab the small UV light that I had packed in my backpack.

"So, now that I've said this to you, I have a question to ask. And knowing that, as a penguin at heart, you are expecting something," I joke lightly as I grab the object and place it in her hand. She gasps out a sob as she looks at the smooth, almost heart-shaped rock.

"Derek," she croaks out as her body shakes.

"I was helping Jackson when I was back at the Ranch. We were surveying that area and skipping rocks. I saw this one and thought of you, so I pocketed it. Funny thing," I chuckle as I blow out the candle, leaving us in the dark. "Turns out, it's kind of a special kind of rock." I click my UV light on and hear her loud gasp as the stone glows a bright orangish-yellow color.

I can barely make her out, but Indy crawls into my lap and devours my mouth with hers. She tastes salty from her tears.

"I love you, Derek." She cries out, and I feel her pinky finger wrap around mine.

"I love you too, Indy," Pulling her back I put my hand between up. "I also got you this pebble, but I wanted to show you the cooler one first." I joke to ease my nerves as I hold the solitaire up between us. "Indy, will you marry me?" A sob wracks through her as she covers her mouth with both her hands before nodding frantically.

I feel instant relief when she holds her hand out to me. I'm shaking so hard I drop the ring between us. "Fuck! Sorry." I grab the ring and gently slide it on her finger. She giggles before kissing me so softly. I grip the back of her head, my hand getting lost in her curls.

"You ain't gonna hurt me darlin'. Show me what you got."