11. Skel

11

SKEL

C eremonial Magic Theory was in a different suffocating classroom, lit up with flickering orbs of light but no windows. Runes and sigils painted the desks and walls, thrumming with magic. The embellished altar with arcane symbols carved into it was still in the middle of the room like the last class. I didn’t understand why we needed two fucking classrooms that looked exactly the same, but whatever.

I didn’t really give a shit either way because my attention was hooked on my fated mate as she sat next to Inferno.

Pandora was truly stunning, and her black glossy hair shined in the illuminating glow of the orbs. Her dark red lips curved into a beautiful smile as she listened to her new friend.

“She’s stunning,” I mumbled, heat streaking down my spine.

Bram shoved an elbow in my gut before sitting down. “Sit down before she notices you gawking.”

“Who cares if she does? She’s my mate. Shouldn’t I be gawking?” I raked a hand through my hair and puffed on my pipe a couple of times.

“She’s our mate, and I feel like we’ve fucked up so bad we don’t even deserve to look at her.” Anguish overtook his expression, and his eyes fluttered shut briefly. “Don’t you agree, Skel?”

My gut churned at the thought of how scared I was of her, even though I was drawn to her last term.

I didn’t trust her because I knew firsthand what it was like to lose control of one’s powers. I was so fucking scared of dying that I didn’t want to chance being around a soul eater that was known for not having control of those powers. Death was an enigma to me, one I didn’t care to figure out…especially after the incident at the village…but Pandora didn’t deserve me treating her like a pariah for it.

It wasn’t her fault that I was so fucked up.

“Fuck.” I forced myself to sit down. “You’re right.”

Pandora’s gaze slipped toward us, and my eyes met hers.

Bram and I stiffened.

Magic from the bond thrummed as our souls tugged together, but as soon as she ripped her attention from me and back to her friend, I was left empty.

It was fucking excruciating but deserved.

“Are you going to be okay with them so close?” Inferno whispered, throwing harsh looks our way. The succubus looked like she was about ready to fucking end us, and it made my lips twitch in happiness. My mate had a friend that cared enough to protect her when we so obviously were incapable to, and for that, I was thankful for.

Pandora nodded once, and they turned their heads to the front.

I rubbed a fist over my chest. My heart fucking ached.

I’d spent the majority of last night taking photos of the stray cats I fed and bonding with the adorable creatures some more. Cats were calming. It was like they were experts at relaxing, and being around them helped my anxiety in a similar way to fae magic.

I knew Pandora would love to see them, so I’d taken photos of each one. There was no way in Kalista I’d convince her to come to Rapture Cavern to meet them with me, but photos would work. She’d told me she loved cats, and so did I. It was something we had in common.

The photos weren’t just for Pandora, though, I also took the photos so I could keep count of them. I wasn’t sure where the others had run off to, but I knew it wasn’t a good thing that they disappeared so quickly.

I snatched one of the many printed photos of cats with apologies scrawled on the back from my bag. I’d printed the photos around three in the morning and wrote extensive apologies for all the fucked up shit I did to her last term on the back. After I made sure Dex fell asleep and was okay, of course.

Dex and I had been friends for a while, and I’d only ever seen his parents after they’d hurt him. They never stuck around for introductions, but that was for the best. I’d probably end up losing control of my magic on purpose around them.

Fuck his parents.

I shook my head from the memory of Dex’s trembling form. He’d been sleeping when I left this morning, and I’d hoped his parents would just fuck off and leave him alone for once. Comet took over watch for me and ended up snuggling up to him when I got out of bed, and she fell asleep in the crook of his arm.

I flipped the photo of the cat back and forth in my hand. The calico I’d brought to the dorm was the model for this one, and she was purring as she rubbed her back in the sand. She was the cutest kitten I’d seen in a long time—I mean, they’re all fucking cute, but, still. I’d named her Comet.

On the back of the photo was my first apology:

I’m sorry that I was so afraid of you that you thought I hated you. I wanted to steer clear of you because I thought you would kill me. I couldn’t have been any more wrong, though. It sounds dumb to write it down, but I’m not afraid of you anymore. I’m afraid of you not wanting me as your mate, and if that’s the case, I get it. I know I don’t deserve you, but I want you more than I want anything else. I just want to make that clear.

-Skel, your fated mate

It wasn’t the best apology, I admitted that, but it was a start. I had to start somewhere. It wasn’t my first time apologizing. I’d had to apologize before: to my sister, to the meager survivors of that village, and to the Demon Council. But I’d never had to apologize to the other half of my soul before.

Fear magic spilled from me as I materialized the spider inked into the back of my hand. Spiders were a very common fear for the demons in this class, surprisingly. Its little legs pressed into my hand as it flattened its back. I placed the photo on top of it, and my magic flickered as I willed the spider to Pandora.

Magic electrified the air as it scuttled over my desk and jumped, going airborne and landing on her desk in front of her.

Inferno screamed. “Fates! Spider!”

Those sitting next to them gasped as they noticed my spider, and my reserves filled from the fear ricocheting through them.

“Reel in your magic, dude.” Bram’s voice was tight.

I winced, taking a hit off my pipe.

The spider vanished, and the photo of the cat that was on its back fluttered onto the hard surface.

Pandora’s shoulders were rigid as she peered down at it. Her lips lifted at the corners as she saw the kitten, and she tentatively reached out and flipped it over. Her nostrils flared, and her red eyes snapped to mine before flicking back and reading my note.

She let out a shaky breath and stuffed my apology photo into her bag without glancing back.

My heart plummeted.

I didn’t know what I expected, but seeing her smile at the photo of Comet stole my breath. I’d thought about how she’d react several times, and I figured out two different outcomes. Her smile was the best one. The worst was her ignoring me. Somehow, I managed both.

“Did your complicated mate just use his fear magic to have a spider crawl on your desk?” Inferno gaped at Pandora, a visible shudder working through her.

“I’m not scared of spiders,” she mumbled. “Plus, he gave me a picture of a kitten.”

“And scared your best friend with a spider.” Inferno whipped her blue-green gaze of hate toward me.

A chill ran down my spine, and I gulped. Sorry , I mouthed.

Inferno snorted. “You should apologize to her.”

Pandora rested a hand over hers. “He did on the back of the photo, but I don’t want to talk about it right now, okay?”

Inferno shot me another glare before reluctantly nodding. “Okay.”

“Ew. Inferno and Gravesend are hanging out?” Dreadful’s annoying voice echoed through the room, and her handless arm went up, brushing her forehead before dropping it.

Satisfaction slithered through me at that.

“Oh my Fates, they totally are!” Voidfire's irritating laugh pierced the air, and she tossed her red hair to the side. “Nightwind must be in heaven right now because he's been into both of them. Can you believe he was even into Inferno? I mean, what kind of succubus doesn't put out?”

“Better than a creepy soul eater that talks to skulls," Dreadful cackled.

“Shut up.” Nightwind rolled his eyes.

Bram's growl reverberated around us. I could sense the fear in them.

My fear magic was leaking out, so I figured I’d put it to use for once. I started to weave illusions of their fears. I mustered more control of my fear magic than I ever had before, directing it slowly but effectively toward the nobles.

My soul was happy, even just being in the same room as my mate, and clearly, my magic was on the same page for being so agreeable.

Before my magic reached them, Inferno clambered to her feet and placed her hands on her hips. “At least we aren't breaking our backs for pieces of shit demons like Nightwind.”

My fear magic faltered as Inferno protected herself and my mate.

“You only call him a piece of shit now because he dumped your ass for me,” Voidfire snapped back, smirking.

“If you honestly think I care about Nightwind breaking up with me because I wouldn't sleep with him in high school , you're pathetic.” Inferno raised a brow at her before glancing at Nightwind for a moment. “He did me a favor. Besides, why would Pandora and I waste our time on him? Easy answer: we wouldn't. So, if you have to brag about being with someone as sad as Nightwind, then you can just shut your mouth.”

Dreadful and Voidfire sputtered, their gazes widening as if they were surprised that Inferno had talked back to them. I wasn't sure of the past there, but there was clearly one.

All I cared about was that she stood up for my mate, but at the same time, I wished I could have used my magic sooner to be the one to stand up for her.

Pandora huffed an amused sound, covering her mouth with her hand.

Inferno sat back down, completely ignoring the two bitches that had tried starting something. “Unfortunately, I did date Nightwind in high school. He used me as a bet and then dumped me because I wouldn't put out. I think that speaks more to his character than mine, but clearly, they disagree.”

“They disagree with most morally right things, anyway.” Pandora shrugged. “I had a few instances last term with Nightwind where I thought he wanted to be my friend, but that wasn’t the case.”

“You don’t want to be his friend anyway.” Inferno glared over her shoulder at them. “Sucks that we have a class with all of them.”

“True. I honestly can’t tell you how relieved I am that I have this class with you,” Pandora told her.

“At least her new friend stands up for her,” Bram muttered under his breath.

I nodded in agreement. “I’m surprised Dreadful is showing her ass still after what we did.”

“It’s surprising that she’s still a dreadful bitch?” Bram asked.

“Guess not.” I let out a weak chuckle, sweeping my hand through my hair.

Ironwood strode into the classroom, and all the chatting stopped. See, reform demons could be respectful at times.

He clapped his hands together, and his lips twisted into a cocky smirk as his brown eyes flitted around the room. “Welcome to term two. You all know the deal, so I'm just gonna jump right into it. Yeah?”

Murmurs of agreement rang out around us.

He tilted his head, and his curly auburn hair fell into his face. My eye twitched as he glanced at Pandora a second too long. “Ceremonial magic in theory can grant amplification to demonic powers. The most talked about amplification is murder. I mean, we are demonic.”

Chuckles from around the room filled the pause before he continued, “Some demons can kill innately, but those with weaker demonic magic could amp up enough to kill someone. Obviously, I highly discourage this.”

More laughter escaped from Dreadful and her friends—of course it would be the fucking nobles finding amusement in killing. None of them were strong enough without using ceremonial magic to enhance their powers, though. Not like I was.

“There are a few demon subtypes that can kill with their powers alone.” Ironwood’s gaze swept across the room. “Ceremonial magic is not to be taken lightly. The consequences can be dire and not just for your intended target, but for you as well. Misuse of your powers can lead to catastrophic results. As demons, you must understand the weight of the demonic power you carry.”

It felt like an icy spear was shoved into my chest cavity as I remembered the village.

“Now,” Ironwood continued, clapping his hands together. “Let’s theorize emotional impact and how that can dictate your magic when performing ceremonial magic…”

When he finally dismissed class after droning on and on about theories , Pandora got up to leave.

My soul lurched toward her, and I was moving before I even realized it. I ran, stumbling over my feet and falling to my knees in front of her—in front of everyone in that damned classroom. I didn’t even give a fuck.

Desperation rattled my fucking soul in a way I could only compare to the night after losing control in the village.

Pandora froze. Her long, black hair cascaded like a silky waterfall past her waist, and her striking red eyes widened in disbelief. Her dark red lips parted as she gasped. “S—Skel?”

“I’m so fucking sorry,” I blurted out, my voice cracking. “I fucked up so bad. Can you feel it? Can you feel how much I regret what I did?”

Demons nearby laughed at me, but I didn’t care. I only cared about Pandora.

Pandora’s eyes softened for a brief moment before she leaned forward and pulled me to my feet. My arms burned with desire from just her hands on my biceps. She moved her lips close to my ear and whispered, “You don’t need to make a big scene, Skel. I feel enough pressure to accept your apology.”

My gaze widened, and I stumbled backward like she’d burned me. “I did this as a gesture of true genuineness. My dad suggested it, but…I don’t want to make excuses for it. I’m sorry for making you uncomfortable.”

Inferno leaned close to Pandora and whispered how significant this gesture was for demons. The simple action was like a light bulb turning on in my mind. I didn’t even think of her not understanding the meaning behind it.

Pandora’s eyes widened as she soaked in the significance of my gesture.

Then, her expression hardened. “You’ve…done so much to hurt me, Skel. From the first moment we locked eyes, you wanted to hurt me. The enchanted ring I wore told me so. You thought the worst of me. You scared me half to death multiple times.”

I flinched from her metaphor. If only she’d known I had scared demons to death in the past.

“The only time you were nice to me was when you got me high in the middle of the night, but then you went back to being mean,” she reminded me, but I didn’t need to be reminded. I knew. “ After the moment we shared after my nightmare, you turned on me like I did something wrong. I probably could’ve forgiven you for the rest if you hadn’t done that.”

Her words cut deep, each one a thorn piercing my heart.

“I need time.” She inhaled deeply. “You scared me so badly I ran up that cliff with nothing but fear fueling me.”

I stumbled backward, pain radiating through my soul so agonizing that I dropped to my knees again. “Pandora…”

“I was terrified, and then I fell.” She shook her head, taking a step backward. “I almost died… again .”

“It was my fault,” I admitted. “I know it was my fault.”

“Let’s go.” Inferno wrapped an arm around Pandora’s shoulders and guided her away.

She didn’t stop. She went with Inferno, walking away, leaving me there on my knees.

Everything else became static. I didn’t give a fuck that the other demons were talking about it. Demons always talked shit. The majority consensus of getting on our knees was a gesture for weak demons, but that was fine. I was weak for her.

Bram stepped up and pulled me to my feet. “You tried. All we can do is try,” he murmured quietly.

“But is trying going to be enough?” As I watched her go, the weight of my actions last term pressed down on me.

“I don’t know,” Bram muttered. “But we still have to try.”

I had so much to make up for. Earning her forgiveness wasn’t guaranteed, and that was what scared me the most.