Chapter 26

When I was younger, I was always that kid who referred to my teacher as ‘Mom’ by accident. In my eternal quest to prove my worth to whichever teacher I had that year, I’d organize our class library or something similar and call out to her for her approval, only to call her ‘Mom’ loud enough for the whole class to hear. Again and again.

I’ve called Dominic, my boss, Dad at least ten times.

This year.

Normally, this boss-pleasing compulsion is useful. It forces me to stay late and finish work that would take other associates days to complete. It makes me constantly hone already-solid arguments until they become works of art. It makes me sacrifice my health and every ounce of my free time to earn the respect of the partners and be the best lawyer I can be. Like I said, it’s useful.

Now, though, it’s filling me with confusing feelings. I’m going to see my boss while in a clear morning-after outfit with a man who likes to say we’re soulmates.

My boss is going to know I have sex.

The thought is as terrifying as the revelation that coincides with it. As a successful woman in my thirties, I should not be worried that my boss will know I have a sex life. It’s possible my brown nosing has gone into unhealthy territory.

I probably need to start seeing a therapist to work through some of these slightly odd eccentricities. It would be nice to stop having the dream where Dominic strangles me with his tie while I continue to file paperwork as a church choir sings behind us.

Panic seizes me as Dominic sees the three of us and nods. I stop, clutching frantically at Grant.

“Do you think I need therapy?” I ask.

Grant’s eyes widen so much that they look like white orbs behind his mop of unruly hair.

“Am I still allowed to lie?”

“No.”

“What about run away?”

I scowl at him. “For someone who professes to be in love with me, you’re not very complimentary.”

He pulls me against his side, kisses the top of my head, and steers us towards Dominic who’s waving us over. “You’re an absolutely enchanting person who could use some therapy. Better?”

It kind of is.

“Just don’t embarrass me in front of my boss. If you do, I’ll stab you and I won’t even care because we’re in a time loop.”

Grant laughs because he still has no idea when I’m being completely serious.

“Since we’re in a time loop, shouldn’t you not care if I embarrass you?”

“Dominic might not remember, but I will. Do you know how many cases I had to win before he even learned my name? Now, I’m his right-hand man. He literally told me that he doesn’t know what he would do without me. I don’t care if he doesn’t remember. I can’t deal with the shame of knowing that he, at one point, thought a little less of me.”

“But you could deal with the memory of stabbing me?” Grant asks, a bit melodramatically if I do say so myself.

It’s not like I said I’d fatally stab him.

“If you don’t say anything to embarrass me—no, if you don’t say anything at all, I’ll let you take me on a real date,” I say quickly as we rapidly approach earshot of my boss.

“When?”

“Tomorrow.”

“Define tomorrow,” he says in a low voice.

The corner of my mouth turns ever so slightly upwards. Telling people to define their words is kind of my thing. It sounds cuter coming from him.

“A today-tomorrow. I’ll let you choose all the activities for an entire time loop day.”

Grant nods, catching my eye as he does so. His eyes are light with amusement, and perfectly serene. Beautiful. For a second, it feels like I’m looking into his brown eyes for the first time, back when I thought they were the most honest, open eyes I’d ever seen. Even from the first glance, I always thought they felt like home.

“There’s my girl,” Dominic says, capturing my attention away from Grant. He has a wide smile and holds out an arm to the side. I do the same. It’s the corporate, HR-approved equivalent of a hug. No touching needed—just the way I like it. “How are you holding up, kiddo?”

Despite the fact that he’s as cleanly pressed as usual in his suit and dyed brown hair, there’s a tired look in his eyes. It’s the only hint that this ordeal has taken as much of a toll on him as it has me.

For a second, the weight of it all threatens to crumple me. The office meant a lot to so many people. Dominic, like me, sacrificed family time and holidays to make the place what it was. And now it’s gone.

“I just can’t believe this is real.”

He nods. “I know what you mean.”

He doesn’t. He really doesn’t, but his commiseration means a lot, nonetheless.

“Now, I’m actually glad you came here.” My heart swells with an amount of pride usually reserved for Nobel Peace Prize winners. I can’t help it though. He’s glad I’m here. I am his right-hand man. He needs me. “You’re always sneaking into work after hours, right?”

I deflate. Does everyone know about that? Here I thought I’d always been so careful and sneaky.

“I wouldn’t say always.”

“Now, now. You sneak in so often that we partners have considered taking some rent out of your pay cheque.” Dominic laughs a country club laugh. It’s all tittles and sideways looks, inviting people to join in. Except they don’t. Grant, for all his inappropriate laughter, just squeezes my hand a little bit. Beth, perpetually perky Beth, stares stone-faced at him.

So, I join in when he’s on the brink of discomfort.

“I guess I do come in a lot,” I say with an extra guffaw thrown in at the end for good measure.

“The boomerang of the office.”

Again, Grant squeezes my hand. Not that I get why. He’s making a joke. A good joke. I do always come back to the office. I’m not ashamed of it. If anything, it’s a compliment. It shows how dedicated I am.

“How can I help?” My voice catches on the last word. Out of the corner of my eye, I catch the expression on Beth’s face. She looks repulsed—and I know what a repulsion looks like. It was the exact same look that I had on my face when she suggested that we do an office friendship bracelet exchange train.

It’s also the same expression that a date had on his face when he asked how I liked my eggs in the morning. I answered him frozen, so that we could conceive a child at exactly the right time in our careers, depending on how emotionally compatible we were about domestic work loads.

“The team here has determined that, while our security system is good, it’s not infallible. There are gaps in the cameras, which is holding them up.”

“What do you mean holding them up?” I ask.

Dominic gestures dismissively. “Now that all the radiation stuff is settled, I want to move onto settling some insurance stuff so we can set up shop elsewhere. But they’re still hung up on wanting to check to make sure there wasn’t anyone in the building.”

“Seems like the right thing to do,” Beth pipes up.

“That’s our little Beth—ever the bleeding heart.” He waves a hand at her.

Beth immediately flushes. Then, her face takes on another expression that I haven’t seen before—anger.

“It’s not me being a bleeding heart. It’s me being sensible. Someone could have gotten into the building last night.” She shoots me a look.

Dominic sees her looking at me and counters with his own imploring stare. It’s like they’re my parents and they want me to choose between them. No, it’s like he’s my dad and she’s some kid in my class and they want me to choose between them. There’s no contest. I would give a kidney to Dominic. I wouldn’t even show up to the Getting-to-Know-You-Jenga event that happened ten feet away from my desk for Beth.

Except… Beth is clearly right about this. Someone could have gotten into the building last night. Someone (me) did.

“Are we sure all the radiation stuff is settled?” I ask, avoiding the issue at hand. “Not really something to take lightly.”

“Yeah, who knows what it could do to a person,” Grant says, smiling to himself like he’s so funny. He can make all the little private jokes he wants about getting superpowers, but that one might have just cost him his date with me.

Not that I can focus on that. Out of the corner of my eye, I see something that makes me catch my breath. The tall, scarred man approaches. Zagreus Hart’s man. He shakes Dominic’s hand while he holds an important-looking briefcase in his other. It’s that over-the-top firm handshake that’s the male equivalent of pissing all over the place.

Strange. There’s no reason for them to be, well not friendly. Familiar? Certainly, there’s nothing friendly or familiar about this man. The scar that runs from the corner of his mouth to nearly his eye isn’t the most intimidating part about him. He has these piercing eyes that seem impossibly blue in contrast to his salt and pepper hair. He looms over us with his wiry frame, all-seeing and apart.

The tall man looks me over. “Who’s this?” He doesn’t even comment on Beth.

Dominic smiles. “This is Hailey Cox, one of our most promising associates.” He looks me over and chuckles. “She isn’t usually dressed like the most popular girl at a frat party.”

Then, he laughs that country club laugh again.

This time, I don’t join in.

Grant goes to step forward, but I squeeze his hand and pull him back. Despite the burning of my ears, I don’t want Grant to make this worse. Dominic just made a joke. A terrible joke, but from his perspective, his work building just collapsed for the first time. It’s no wonder he’s not at his best.

Although, I didn’t expect him to make such a misogynistic joke even at his worst. In front of someone who appears to be in business with us, no less.

“Anyways,” I stutter, feeling a little off kilter still from Dominic. “Maybe we should check in about the radiation before we go on to other avenues.”

“Are you thinking that you know more about emergency response protocol than the professionals?” the tall man asks in a voice that sounds like a threat.

Smooth. Turn the tables with a question. My personal tactic of choice.

“Besides, the radiation danger was mostly a hoax. A prank even,” Dominic adds.

It takes every bit of my professionalism to school my face into something that doesn’t broadcast my deep disbelief. Ordering your date chardonnay with steak is a prank. Demolishing a skyscraper is just a couple steps more serious than that.

“Forgive me, but I didn’t catch your name.”

The tall man runs a pinky down the length of his scar. “Perhaps because I didn’t offer it?”

This is weird. Why on Earth would one of Zagreus Hart’s men be here? This building has absolutely zero affiliation with his company or any of its subsidiaries.

And why does Dominic know him?

“Dominic, who is he?” I ask.

I try not to look too smug as I ask. This man might think he’s a big shot, but I am Dominic’s right-hand man. For the past year, we have been an inseparable team. I’ve built up every case he’s had and served it up to him as a platter. We’re practically one mind.

We have no secrets.

Or so I thought.

“Hailey,” Dominic hisses at me, like I’ve somehow overstepped. By asking for a name.

The tall man smiles—or at least his mouth curves up. There’s nothing joyous about the motion. “Mr. Price, it would seem your associates don’t know their place. Didn’t you tell me you run a tighter ship than this?”

Dominic pauses and purples. Then, he laughs another country club laugh that physically grates on me.

“Clearly this one is going through something.” He nods towards me. I’m holding onto Grant’s hand and wearing his ridiculous t-shirt. My face burns, even though I know I’m not out of line. “The shock of the building has made her emotional.”

If his laugh grated on me, the word emotional is like proverbial nails on the chalkboard of my soul. I’ve done nothing to warrant being called emotional, especially by someone who’s legendary for his office tantrums directed at whichever newcomer was unfortunate enough to make an error.

Or does anger not count as an emotion?

“With all due respect, I’m not emotional. I’m just asking why this man is at the site of a building collapse when he’s an unaffiliated civilian.”

Dominic purples again. It’s the same hue that he gets whenever he’s ready to unleash on some intern who got the wrong coffee order. “With all due respect,” he spits. “You need to—”

The tall man waves him off and takes a step towards me, tilting his head like I’m a particularly interesting specimen at a museum. “I’ll indulge the curiosity, Mr. Price. I rather appreciate someone who asks the right questions.” He pauses. “The company I’ve worked for just went through some major construction and we were hoping we could lend some of our architectural support to discover why the building suffered such a structural tragedy. So, wouldn’t it be logical that I was called in to consult?”

A structural tragedy? Is that really the story he’s trying to peddle?

Such a story might work for headlines and excerpts for people unfamiliar with the building, but I am not one of those people. No, I took the time to learn as much as possible as I could about my second home.

“Our building was a structural marvel. Above code in every possible way.” As I say this, Dominic’s jaw ticks, but he doesn’t respond this time.

“Isn’t that what they said about the Titanic?” the tall man counters.

“Are you saying that our building encountered some sort of metaphorical iceberg?” I press. “Because it just seems a little too convenient.”

“Define convenient.”

“Hailey,” Dominic hisses again. “I think you’re done here. Go home before you do irreparable damage to the firm.”

I’m not done though. If Dominic had bothered to attend any of my court days, he’d know I’m just getting started.

“It just seems overly convenient that the building collapsed at the exact time that there was no one inside.”

“Go home,” Dominic warns.

“Don’t you mean lucky?” the tall man asks, ignoring Dominic, which only serves to rile him up further.

I decide to do the same. I don’t know what is going on with Dominic today, but apparently I’m going to need to treat this as an ask forgiveness, not permission scenario.

“I’m not sure if any part of this can be construed as lucky, but as far as tragedies go, yes, lucky. I guess.”

I keep my eyes trained on the man. So often, people only think about giving away the truth when they’re speaking. They don’t consider what physical clues they give away when they react to what other people say.

The tall man doesn’t react at all, except for a faint twitch of his lip that causes his scar to jump. Interesting.

“Preliminary thoughts are that the chemical agents used by the fumigators reacted with a compound that was meant to seal some of the structural components of the building’s frame. Several of the neighbours reported hearing a series of loud cracks, which supports the scientific explanation. Isn’t that what people are saying?”

I nod along like he’s not spouting off the most superficial, science-sounding nonsense I’ve ever had the misfortune of having to withstand. Unfortunately, I can see this playing great in the papers. Chemicals, witnesses, and the miracle that no one was hurt. What headlines.

“The fumigation wasn’t set to start until tomorrow morning,” I counter.

Beth raises her eyes to mine and gives, what I think, is an almost imperceptible nod. Suddenly, her offer to bring muffins to ‘help out’ makes a bit more sense. Who would’ve thought Beth had a bit of shark in her after all?

“They started early,” Dominic says through clenched teeth.

I stop. I stop and I listen. I stop playing the role of suck-up mentee and try to view this situation as impartially as I can. If I had to judge Dominic on just his actions today alone, there are two conclusions that come readily. The first, is that he’s an asshole. The second is that he’s in on this.

“There weren’t any cracking sounds and there weren’t any witnesses,” I say in a low, even voice, just in case what I say gets written off as emotional.

The tall, scarred man’s eyes narrow into piercing points of blue ice. He stares me down in a gesture that I’m sure has made lesser people crumble. I stare right back.

“Price,” he snaps. “Remind me: who this pest is and why you have you been unable to muzzle her insinuations?”

Dominic, full purple, steps forward. Almost between us. I don’t break eye contact with the tall man. If Dominic won’t stand up to him, I will. We are an environmental law firm mandated to protect the earth and he is nothing but a polluter and a bully. He is exactly the kind of person I’ve vowed to take down.

“She’s nothing. Just one of our sea of mediocre associates.”

I flinch, but I don’t back down.

“I’m going to let you know right now that that story you’ve concocted about the structural integrity of our building isn’t going to work. I was in the building last night and that’s not how it happened. So, why don’t you go back to your boss, Zagreus Hart, and let him know that whatever you had planned isn’t going to work. None of it is going to work because I won’t let it. I’m going to tell everyone how the building really fell and I’ll see you in court if you do anything to stop me.”

If I’ve gotten under the tall man’s skin, it doesn’t show. His lips quirk and his eyes flash, but it’s not with anger. If anything, amusement shines back at me.

Amusement that is not mirrored in Dominic.

“Goddamnit, Hailey,” he spits. “If you say one more word, it’ll be your last as a representative of this company.”

I break eye contact with the tall man. Did Dominic just threaten to fire me? I know I’m a bit out of line, but not that much. I’m right. This is what we do.

This is not how Dominic talks to me. No, I’m kiddo and finger guns. I’m claps on the back and praise. I’m his right-hand man.

“Granted, my behaviour earlier was a little unanticipated,” I cede. “This though, this is exactly how we need to proceed. Bringing crimes to light is what we do. We bring down polluters like him.”

Dominic breathes out a ragged breath. “I don’t have the time or the patience to hold your hand today and spoon feed you endless praise. Remember the NDA you signed when you came on with the company and keep your mouth closed. Now, get the hell out of here.”

I freeze.

Out of all the things that have happened to me lately, this seems the most surreal. Am I really being gagged and banished by my mentor? Over some very obvious dirty dealings?

And is he seriously reminding me of the NDA?

“The NDA only applies to external conversations. I’d like to hear what the name partners have to say when I tell them about this.”

Dominic squares his shoulders and steps towards me. He’s in my space looming over me. Even though I know he would never be stupid enough to hurt me, the threat is there. It’s a tactic I’ve seen him use countless times, and yet I never stopped to consider how fucking awful it is.

“Then consider yourself fired. Now leave before I get someone to make you leave.”

Before I can say anything, Grant steps in front of me and into Dominic’s face. While Dominic is an older man whose physique shows he spends more time at the gym than with his family, he’s no match for the cartoonish perfection that is Grant.

But this isn’t his fight.

I grab Grant’s hand and pull him out of the way.

“You have no grounds to fire me. I know I could make a case for whistleblower—”

“No grounds!” Dominic explodes, then casts an eye in Grant’s direction and lowers his voice. “You just admitted to illegally entering the building.”

Well, that’s true.

“Still, you can’t just fire me!”

Wrong thing to say.

Dominic bristles at me daring to infer his power has limits. “You are an associate who reports directly to me. The partners will stand by my decision.”

“So, you’re just going to fire me?” My voice breaks slightly. “Even though we’re a team.”

Because that’s what he always said we were.

“I already have.”

I didn’t cry at my grandpa’s funeral. Mostly because I didn’t go. I didn’t go because Dominic told me that he really needed my help on a case, so I skipped the funeral and worked.

I didn’t cry then, but hot tears well over my eyes now.

It’s stupid. It’s just a job and Dominic is just a boss. But suddenly I feel like I’m drowning.

“Good luck replacing me,” I hiss. “I work my ass off for this company!”

Dominic shrugs. “So we’ll hire two paralegals. It’ll still be cheaper than you.”

Then, he turns away from me.

Dismissed. Replaced. Forgotten. I’ve given this company the very spirit in my bones and yet it sloughs me off as easily as an unwanted winter jacket in the spring. The company continues unchanged, while I’m left a depleted echo of my former self.

With nothing left to lose, I grab the briefcase out of the tall man’s hands.

“Now, Grant,” I yell.

Just like that, he scoops me up in his arms and we’re off flying. We fly until the ground below is a sea of tiny dots looking up at us with awe. We fly until I can’t see their faces and they can’t see my tears.

We can’t fly far enough, though, to escape the overwhelming sadness that consumes me. I know today will reset and I’ll still have my job. Dominic will never have snapped at me, never fired me. If I see him, he’ll probably shoot me a finger gun and call me kiddo.

Except now I know the truth. That job was my world, but I was nothing to it. I was just the foolish girl who gave it everything and confused empty praise for true appreciation.