20. A GODS-DAMNED PROMISE

Chapter twenty

A GODS-DAMNED PROMISE

A dari found me in the royal study overlooking the cemetery the morning after our triumph. With a reverent gleam in his eyes, he presented me a wax-sealed envelope.

"I was asked to hold onto this until your victory was secure," he said, a quirk at his lips. "I believe now is the right time."

"What is it?"

"A gift from someone who never once doubted you. I hope it brings you the peace you deserve, Highness."

He bowed and went on his way without another word. Brow pinched, I turned the envelope over in my hand, and my breath hitched. I knew that signet: Cadagon. Another letter? How very him to get one last word in from beyond the grave. I popped the wax seal and traced my finger across the dented words in the parchment.

You will find my wedding gift not ten minutes through the Evermoor Woods. When the weight of your new crowns grows heavy, I hope you will find solace there as I often did. Please tend to the garden. It might very well be the only thing I have done right in my life. Live simply. Live well, my children. I am so proud of you both.

- Your Father

My heart ached. What I wouldn't give to see that cocky smirk on his face as he beheld the strides already made to unite Anathema and restore her balance. I could picture it clear as night: the chuckle rolling through him when he discovered our enemies had fallen. The sheer possibilities of what could have been washed over me, and I swallowed my grief. Perhaps in another world. Another life. I tucked the letter into my coat pocket.

We could have been a family.

Sleep evaded me. I turned on my side, and my sights danced over my wife, her skin drenched in the hearth's warm amber glow. The sight took my breath away. Lost in a dream, her lashes fluttered—peaceful and serene. I caressed her cheek with a feather-light touch, slipped from our bed, and pulled the tousled silk sheets over her. My treasure. My prize.

I made my way through the castle, heading for the shapeshifter path to clear my mind. Breathe. We'd accomplished our goals, and yet I couldn't wrap my head around it. Couldn't believe we'd actually done it. Suri insisted acceptance would come with time, though I admit I wasn't entirely convinced. So for the time being, I'd focus on simpler, more welcomed matters, like Cadagon's elusive wedding gift.

I drifted through the Evermoor Woods, captivated by its tranquil beauty. For the first time since arriving in Anathema, I felt safe. Secure and present in the moment instead of constantly looking over my shoulder for the next threat. I heaved in a deep breath of piney air. Yes, change was on the horizon. Already the trees were starting to recover as their toxic leaves drank in new, balanced air. Wildlife ran about in giddy exploration. Even the moon shone brighter.

Anathema was healing.

I emerged from the trees into a clearing littered in black rose bushes, a path winding through its center. The crash of waves reverberated in the distance, and I followed the sound like a siren's call over the hill opposite the dreaded revel den, thank the Gods. "Alright, old man. Let's see what you got."

I flipped the lock on a white picket fence. Planter boxes and clay pots dotted the yard, the lush blooms within swaying in the briny ocean breeze. Warmth built in my cheeks. Death had nurtured life here. A beautiful oxymoron: just as he had been. He'd tended to the soil and pruned the plants to perfection. Though he'd left us, this part of him—the true, gentle pieces he'd been forced to hide away—lived on.

I waded in farther, losing myself in the sheer variety of flora. Reds and purples, thorns and shrubs. But most impressive of all was the lone, potted bush perched on a crescent-shaped platform in the garden's center. Foreign to Anathema's innate darkness, the white roses intrigued me. A plaque jutted up from its soil: To Eternal Love and New Beginnings. My lips quirked up as the petals' sweet scent carried around me.

Cadagon, you old softy.

I cast my sights to the old Victorian house reaching for the clouds at the cliff's edge. Amazing: how it had somehow survived the massacre. Or maybe Death had rebuilt it? Whatever the reason, it—

A flash of white caught my eye on the far end of the porch, and I started up the stairs. "Hello?" Silence returned my call, but a steady crunch of footsteps lured me closer. In a vegetable garden overlooking the cliff, a woman in a white robe tended to her crop. A knot tangled in my throat. "Mother..."

Barefoot with her hands sunk into the moist dirt, she sang a song I hadn't heard in over fifteen years. Bewitched by her voice, I settled on my knees at her side.

Fate be blessed, and bless us too, that we might serve the will of you. And if it be within thy plan, may your nurturing light spread across the land.

The difference between my last glimpse of her and this one made my heart swell. She was so calm and carefree. So happy.

Again, I looked over at the house locked away since my youth, and memories seized me. Tears blurred my vision as Cadagon's intention took root in my soul. That man…he'd given me more than a simple gift. He'd filled a part of the gaping hole my mother's loss had created in me, despite it never being his responsibility. Death, in all his kindness, had given me the desire of my heart. My dear boy, you have always had a home.

His words solidified in me as I sat there—fingertips in the moist earth—listening to my mother's joyful songs. Remembering. Feeling the way Cadagon had encouraged me to. Years he must have spent rebuilding my childhood home from scratch after it burnt down. He'd breathed new life into its charred bones.

The same way he'd done with me.

I let hope creep beyond the walls I'd built inside myself, acceptance steadily setting in. My life, my future, had turned out far grander than my wildest dreams. I'd built unbreakable friendships with loyal, passionate people I hadn't seen coming. Made a home in a world full of wonder and adventure. Most of all, I had a partner with which to share my heart, who was not only worth dying for, but worth living for. I finally knew where I belonged.

I'd found my destiny.

After returning to the castle, I tossed together Kim's and my belongings in two bags, fetched my bride from her slumber, and stole us into the night.

"Where are we going?" she asked.

"You'll see."

Excitement buzzed between us as we walked the moonlit path through the woods hand in hand. Together: the same way we'd always done.

Embodying my deepest fantasies in her lacy robe, she meandered through the garden.

Her black-tinged fingers plucked a red rose, and she pressed her nose to the petals.

"Beautiful," she sighed, and met my gaze. "But what is this place?"

"A gift. From your father."

At the mention of him, her expression tightened, conflicting emotions evident in her distant stare.

"He loved you so much," I murmured. "But I'll let you in on a little secret."

She raised a brow. "Oh yeah, and what is that?"

"Nobody could possibly love you as much as I do."

I swept her into my arms, her laughter tickling my neck as I carried her up the front steps. Pausing at the door, I leaned down and kissed her deeply, and she returned my affection with heavy breaths. Enamored, I stepped over the threshold.

"Welcome to your honeymoon, my Queen."

"And yours." She skimmed a finger along my jawline. "My King."

I started up the stairs to the second story with her legs wrapped around my waist, our mouths devouring one another. In the backmost bedroom, I laid her down and made my way to the French doors, opening them to the incoming storm. Raindrops and wind chimes and waves swept in like a symphony. Ivy twisted across the balcony banister covered in dew, and I picked a leafless stem.

"I wonder who used to live here," she said.

"This was…this was my home." I flicked a match to light a candle on the nightstand; the spark reflected in a full-length mirror.

"Here?" She pushed up on her elbows. "But…how? I thought everything burned in the massacre."

"Turns out even broken things can be made new with enough patience. And that's what I plan to do here," I whispered, and ran my thumb along her bottom lip. "Patiently remake this bond between us into something new. No more masks or half-truths. No more holding back. Just you and me as we are in this moment. That is, if you'll have me?"

I took her hand and got down on one knee.

"What…what are you doing?" She clutched her chest.

"Kimberly Ann Bradshaw, would you do me the honor of making me the luckiest damn man in existence?"

"I…but we—we're already married."

"On paper. But I want this to be real. I want to know that every morning when I wake up and reach for you—those big, beautiful eyes falling on me—that you chose this. That you chose me."

"Coop, it's always been you."

"Then, marry me?"

She extended her hand with a giddy nod. "Are you kidding? Of course I'll marry you."

I tied the bit of ivy around her finger in a bow, and her lips crashed into mine. My wife. I crawled over her, pinning her beneath me. Our tongues tangled together—her desire burning hot and fast—but I'd waited too long to hear those words not to savor the taste. To sip her passion in small, calculated mouthfuls.

I broke from our kiss, my hips settling between her thighs. "Do you trust me?"

"Of course I do," she breathed.

"Then can you do something for me?"

"Anything."

"Relinquish control. Let go."

She nodded with hooded eyes, and I seized control, trailing kisses down to her collarbone. More. I craved more . My mouth watered at her scent, and I realized then the future I faced. This part of Lyvias—the thirst, the fangs, the unquenchable desire—would stay with me forever: the consequences of the ritual and my cross to bear. But I had a hunch someone might be willing to tame the beast inside me, or better yet, feed it.

I nipped Kim's neck with sharpened teeth. "I want to taste you, drink you in."

"Drink your fill. I am yours, completely."

I sank my teeth into her—heart pounding—and her sweet blood trickled down my throat like warm honey. Her gasp in my ear made my cock pulse. I pulled my lips free to glance down at her, licking her blood off my teeth.

"It's like you were made for me."

Her mouth fell open as I slipped my hand into her already wet panties. My thumb swirled around her swollen clit while my free hand made quick work of removing her silk top. Her peaked breasts bounced free, and a moan tore through me. Mine. All mine. I sucked her nipple into my mouth—my thumb and tongue swirling in tandem—and her hips bucked at the friction. Her breaths grew ragged. Without warning, I buried three fingers in her, sweeping them in come-here motions.

"That's right, baby. Come for me."

"Oh, fuck!" she cried out.

She bit her lip, bearing down on my fingers as she crashed over the edge. I needed her. Needed to bury myself inside her. I yanked my shirt over my head, and she pushed closer to trace the fresh burn holes on my shoulders. A pained expression eclipsed her face, but she didn't ask who or why. She already knew. Instead, she placed a soft kiss atop one before making her way to the next, all the while fighting with my pants. She popped the last button, staring me straight in the eyes as she licked her palm and slid it down to wrap around the base of my cock. My eyes rolled back at how perfectly I fit in her hand, as if we had been predestined to fit like missing puzzle pieces.

She began to pump as her thumb swept over my head. "You're so thick."

"You'll know just how thick when I fill that tight little pussy of yours."

To this, she forced me to lay back on the bed, discarded her thong, and straddled me. Her bare center on my shaft nearly had me coming on contact, but I fought it. Far too soon. She guided my head to her entrance, but I caught her wrist and shuffled out from under her. "Patience, my Queen."

"I'm no good at that," she grumbled, her naked frame crumbling on the mattress.

Oh, but she would have to be, because I had an idea. A damn good one at that. I made my way to the room's edge and dragged the mirror next to the bed.

"Show me how much you want this." I grasped my rock-hard length. "Show me how wet you are for me."

With a wicked grin on her face, she spread her legs wide. I bit my lip, stroking myself as I watched her play. Her brow creased, her fingers gliding in and out, and her knees began to quiver.

"Fuck, that's hot," I muttered.

"Yeah? You like that? You like watching me pleasure myself for you?"

"Oh, hell yeah, but I'm going to need you to come here. Now."

I grabbed her ankles and dragged her to the edge of the bed. Looking down at her, I positioned her head at my waist. "The next time you come, it'll be on my cock, understand?"

"Yes."

"Yes, sir ," I demanded.

She grabbed my ass. "Yes, sir."

She sucked me into her mouth with force, taking me all at once.

"Shit—Kim, your mouth is fucking heaven."

My fingers tangled in her hair as her tongue skimmed across my head before driving me back in her throat again and again. Her moan reverberated around me, making my stomach drop. I was going to burst. No. Not yet.

Taking firm hold of her hips, I switched our positions. After sitting down on the bed's edge, I guided her to stand facing away from me and met her gaze in the mirror. Slow and soft, I teased her entrance with my length, eliciting a sigh from her parted lips.

"Do you want this?" I asked, watching her stance lower towards my lap.

"Gods, yes," she heaved.

"Then be a good girl and sit."

I slammed her down on my cock, filling her completely, and she screamed out. Holy… So tight. So wet. So perfect . I became feral, thrusting myself harder and harder into her. My hand wrapped around her neck, gently guiding her attention back to the mirror.

"Look at you," I growled. "Look how well you take me, baby."

Her muscles clenched, her back arching in time. "Cooper, I'm going to come again."

My name on her tongue only encouraged me more. I collected her hips in a firm grip, driving her down. My head swam. This woman was going to destroy me. And I was going to fucking let her.

"Say my name again," I ordered.

"Cooper."

I rolled my hips deeper, watching my cock slip in and out. "Oh shit, yeah."

"Harder!" she screamed.

"That's it. Take it."

"I'm coming!"

Together we cried out as the passion grabbed hold. The euphoria ripped across every nerve in my body, and I collapsed, my forehead coming to rest on her quivering back. I fought for air. Of all the times I had imagined her relinquishing control and handing her closely clutched dominance to me, I'd never once imagined it would be that powerful. That ground shaking. Absolute madness in the best way. I hugged her close, kissing up her spine.

"I love you," I whispered.

"I love you more."

There was no chance in hell that was true, but I let her have it. She slid me out of her with a gasp and started towards the bathroom. Again, I caught her wrist.

"And just where do you think you're going?" I asked.

"To shower?"

"Funny, because I don't remember saying I was finished with you yet."

She grinned. "Is that a threat?"

"No, baby. That's a gods-damned promise."

Fully spent, Kim snuggled close and tucked her head against my chest. We laid there, blissfully content, our laughter giving way to comfortable silence aside from the crash of the waves seeping in through the cracked doors.

I laced my fingers through hers. "You kept your promise."

"What promise?" she asked.

"You said you'd always be my home."

"Always."

Our magic emerged—first from her, then me—and met between us to melt together. Without thinking, I swiped a finger through the warm mist.

"You know, you've never told me why you do that," she murmured.

"Do what?"

"Go somewhere else. Drift."

I chuckled. "I'm right here."

"No. I mean, it's like you're looking at someone. You're here but…not."

The burgundy fog swept through her hair, tousling it a bit, which had quickly become one of my favorite views. Her: wild and free.

She smoothed her hair back down. "I love it here, but it's drafty…"

With a shiver, she snuggled closer, tucking the sheets up over us.

"It's not a draft. Our magic can be a little…distracting at times. And handsy when it comes to you." I smirked down at her. "Seems to be especially active tonight. I can't imagine why that might be."

"Ha, my shadows can certainly be distracting, but with focus—" She startled. "Wait, our magic?"

"From our pact, yeah. You really don't see it?"

"No, I don't see it. How do you see it?"

The image of June's bright light as she encouraged me towards my destiny sharpened in my mind's eye. It was time Kim knew. "Juniper."

"June? But how…why? I—I don't understand. You met her?"

"Right before you said goodbye, yes. The sandman dropped me in the Shroud, and she found me. Saved my ass, actually. I told her you'd opened The Book of Shade and she needed to get to you."

"What did she say?" Kim propped herself up.

"She said she knew that day would come but wanted to keep you for herself just a little longer. She wanted me to tell you how much she'd miss you. How much she loved you."

Kim nodded and kissed my chest.

"After that," I continued, "she granted me oracle sight to flesh out those who meant you harm. She's pretty amazing. I get why you fell for her."

It's funny: the admission didn't hurt like it used to. There was no twinge of jealously. No hard feelings. It was simply fact. They'd loved, and they'd loved hard; but there were no insecurities brewing in my mind about Kim regretting ending up with me. She loved me hard too. I felt it in her touch. Saw it hanging there in her eyes like a promise. We were simply meant to be.

"When did you first notice it? Our magic?" she asked.

"After our first pact, but it changed when we completed the marriage ritual. When we combined our blood, it melded to become something both you and me. Honestly, I don't know how, but it's grown on me. It's special. It feels like…us."

"But we fulfilled the original agreement. Why would that blood pact magic still bind us?"

My stomach jumped. I hadn't considered that, but she was spot on. We'd ended Death as we'd sworn to do, though neither of us had expected to suffer such guilt from it. Such grief. The pact had been fulfilled.

I pursed my lips. "Huh, good question."

"What does it look like?"

"A burgundy mist, but it has this opalescent sheen. The longer it lingers, the more conscious it becomes somehow. Alive in its own right. It flows between us when it chooses, but it definitely favors you. Seems to enjoy teasing you." I tugged her hair playfully. "Can't say I blame it. It's pretty damn fun."

"Har-har."

"Honestly, I haven't seen anything like it aside from when Odin and Malachi were near each other."

"What do you mean?"

"Odin's magic was a kind of shimmery turquoise. Every other form of magic in the realm is more…translucent, I guess you could say."

"Odin's magic?" She sat up straight. "Coop, hellhound abilities are a genetic thing not a magical affinity. Hounds don't wield magic. That's why he always shifted during any altercation. More protection."

"Well, it wasn't Malachi's. His affinity was as dark and twisted as they come. If it wasn't his, then—"

I stopped short, the wheels in my head turning. The second part of my mother's proclamation of how Fate had smiled on me rushed back: She gave you a special gift. You see, she took part of that big heart of yours, and she gave a piece of it to another.

The magic around us sparked with new intensity as reality wove together in my mind. If Malachi and Odin had it…if Kim and I shared that same bond…

"We're mates," I whispered.

Kim's brow pinched. "What?"

"Our magic: it had nothing to do with the pact. It was always ours. It's why I followed you here. It's why I've always been drawn to you like a moth to an open flame, willing to burn if it means I can be even a touch closer to you." I pinched her to look up at me. "You are my soulmate."

Tears welled in her eyes as the dots connected. All this time—the days, weeks, years—where we simply couldn't stay away from each other; the intensity she'd felt in finding a cure for me; and the ensuing heartbreak of letting me go: it all finally made sense. From day one, our souls had called to each other.

"Fate made you for me," she purred.

"And you for me."

Our lips met in a consuming kiss. Our hearts: finally one.