Chapter 28

Twenty-Eight

The dorm felt suffocating without Alex. The empty side of the room was a glaring void, stripped of the personality it once held. The faint smell of his cologne still lingered, mocking me with a ghost of what used to be normal. I hadn’t expected him to stay—not after everything he knew. His disgust had been clear when he left, and I couldn’t blame him. No words had been exchanged when he packed his things. He’d just given me one last look, filled with revulsion before the door slammed shut behind him.

I didn’t need his words to know what he thought of me. I deserved every ounce of it.

Now, the silence in the room was deafening. The hum of the mini fridge, the faint creak of the building settling—it all grated on my nerves. I sat on the edge of my bed, my leg bouncing uncontrollably, the rhythm pounding in time with my thoughts. My phone sat heavy in my hand, the light from the screen glaring back at me. The words I needed to say to Kira were a storm in my head, loud and relentless. No excuses. No justifications. Just the truth.

My fingers trembled as I typed.

I’m not asking for forgiveness. I don’t deserve it. But I need you to know something. I avenged you. Every single one of those bastards who touched you at that party—every one of them—I found them, and I made sure they’ll never hurt anyone again. I didn’t do it for redemption. I did it because I couldn’t live with what I’d done to you, what I’d allowed to happen. If you want proof, I’ll give it to you. If you want to report me, go ahead. I won’t stop you. I’ll be waiting in the basement of the science building. I’ve removed the door, so you’ll know you can leave whenever you want. I won’t stop you.

The moment I hit send, my chest tightened , like the room itself was holding its breath. My hands trembled as I shoved my phone into my pocket and grabbed the bag I’d prepared. My thoughts spiraled into a vortex of anxiety and grim determination.

The items felt heavier than they should, like they carried the weight of my sins. And maybe they did. They weren’t just objects; they were symbols. My surrender. My penance. My offering.

The short drive to the old science building was unnervingly quiet. The streets were lined with the skeletal remains of trees long since stripped by the wind, their branches clawing at the empty sky. My tires crunched over loose gravel as I pulled up, the engine’s hum dying abruptly as I turned it off.

The basement door leaned against the wall where I’d left it, stripped of its purpose. It looked almost pitiful, a useless piece of wood that no longer protected anyone—not that it ever had. I stepped inside, the cold, damp air wrapping around me like a shroud. My breath fogged in front of me, dissipating into the darkness.

Every step felt deliberate, like I was marching toward my own execution. And maybe I was. The old concrete walls seemed to close in, the faint smell of mildew sharp and acrid. Memories of Kira in this space flooded back unbidden, each one cutting deeper than the last. Her screams, her defiance, her pain—they all played on a loop, a haunting melody I couldn’t escape.

I dropped the bag by the air mattress I’d set up beneath the exposed pipe. The knife clattered as I laid it out, the sound sharp and final in the stillness. Each item I placed on the mattress felt like a piece of myself being laid bare. The cuffs clicked shut around my wrists, biting into my skin as I tugged at them, testing their hold. Solid. Unforgiving. Just like I deserved.

I threw the key across the room, watching as it skittered into the shadows. A one-way trip. I wouldn’t be getting out of this unless Kira chose to let me. And if she didn’t come, well, that would be the answer I deserved.

The mattress sagged as I lowered myself onto it, the cold seeping into my skin. The gag, ear plugs, blindfold, and knife sat beside me in a neat row, their presence a silent accusation. The silence pressed down on me, thick and suffocating.

This was it.

The text was out. The door was gone. The cuffs were locked. There was no escape—just the way it should be. If Kira came, she’d find me here. Exposed. Vulnerable. At her mercy. If she didn’t… I wouldn’t last long like this. The thought didn’t scare me. It felt right.

The air felt heavier now, the silence pressing in from all sides. My chest rose and fell in shallow bursts as I stared up at the beams above me. Every creak and groan of the old building seemed amplified, a reminder of how alone I was. My mind raced, replaying everything that had led me to this point.

The party. The basement. Her smile before everything broke. The way her eyes lit up when she thought no one was looking. I had destroyed all of it. Every beautiful, fragile piece of her. And for what? My own selfish need to control, to possess?

I closed my eyes, the cold air burning against my skin. For the first time, I let myself feel the full weight of what I’d done. The memories, the guilt, the unrelenting ache of knowing I’d ruined her—all of it crashed over me like a tidal wave. This wasn’t about redemption. Redemption was a luxury I didn’t deserve. This was about giving her a choice. A way to take back the control I’d stolen.

If this was my last moment, I could live with that.

For her, I could die with that.