Chapter 27

27

Hawk held Kate's gaze, his eyes filled with a mixture of regret and determination. "I had to do it. If I was going to protect you, it had to go down the way it did."

"The Consortium was after me," he continued. "Even back then. Before I met you, I agreed to do some undercover black ops work that earned me their attention. Once I met you, though, I told my team leader I wanted out. Figured I could walk away. But the Consortium kept coming after me. The only way to protect you was to let you think I was dead."

Inside, Kate felt like she was dying, but at the same time, she was curiously numb. Having spent her career in black ops, she understood the price they sometimes had to pay. Still, he could have trusted her.

Instead, he'd decided for both of them, taking the most destructive path imaginable.

She stared down at his hands, the new scars and the old ones. "We could have disappeared together."

He was shaking his head before she finished. "No way. This isn't a life I would have wished on you."

"That should have been my decision."

Kate fixed Hawk with a piercing stare, trying to ignore how tired, how very worn, he looked. "You could have reached out. Sent a message, a sign, anything to let me know you were alive."

Hawk ran a hand through his hair, his eyes flickering away from hers. "I had to stay off the grid, completely invisible. Any contact with you would have put you in danger."

"So you just let me believe you were dead? For twelve years?" Her voice rose, her hands clenching into fists at her sides.

Hawk's shoulders slumped. "I didn't have a choice. The Consortium was watching me, tracking my every move. If they'd found out about you…"

"What? What would they have done?"

Hawk sighed heavily, his gaze meeting hers once more. "I don't know. But I couldn't risk it. I couldn't risk you."

"So you just kept running. While I was left to pick up the pieces of my life. You know I thought I left you to die, right?"

Hawk reached out, his hand hovering inches from her arm before falling back to his side. "I thought I was doing the right thing."

She turned away, wrapping her arms tightly around her middle. "The right thing for who? Because it sure wasn't the right thing for me."

Fenn had been still and silent through the long exchange, but the longer she and Hawk talked, the more physically agitated he grew, his jaw clenching and his fists curling at his sides. Finally, he said what she couldn't seem to say herself. "You broke her, dude. Walking away would have been one thing. Faking your death might have been necessary, but letting Kate believe it was her fault? No bueno. Not ever, for any reason."

Hawk barely reacted, his expression remaining neutral. He sent Kate one of those simmering, "heartfelt" looks that used to make her melt. Only this time, she felt more like curdled cheese.

She took a deep breath, trying to steady herself. The room suddenly felt too small, too hot. She needed air. Space to think. She glanced at Fenn, saw the concern in his eyes. He gave her a small nod, a silent show of support.

She turned back to Hawk, her voice steady despite the turmoil inside her. "I need some time to process this. I can't… I can't do this right now."

Hawk started to protest, but Kate held up a hand, cutting him off. "No. You don't get to come back into my life after twelve years and expect me to just jump back in like nothing happened. I need time."

"Yeah." Hawk winced. "About that. We don't have any."

The cryptic words earned him a furious glare from Fenn. "What aren't you telling us. No. Wait." Fenn put up his hands. "What else aren't you telling us?"

Hawk tensed, like he was ready to throw a punch.

The man never had much liked to be questioned, Kate remembered.

"They're here," Hawk said. "The Consortium. They're coming for me. For all of us."

Fenn groaned. "Terrific. You don't think you could have led with that little factoid?" He shot to his feet and paced to the window, staring out. "Storm has subsided. For the moment. It's like midnight now." He turned to Kate, his expression softening. "We should head back to the hotel. Catch some sleep. Sort out the rest in the morning."

A great call. She needed time to think, to process everything that had happened.

But Hawk shook his head, his voice urgent. "You can't leave. The Consortium is out there. They were already after me because of what I know. The evidence I have. And now they know you two are involved somehow."

Fenn's back stiffened, his eyes narrowing. "Because you tricked us into meeting you," he pointed out, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "Nice move there, jerk."

Hawk held up his hands, his expression pleading. "I didn't trick you. Well, okay, I did. But I need your help. Hate me all you want, but if the Consortium decides to come after you—when they come after you—this warehouse is the only fortified position in town."

A chill ran down Kate's spine. Hawk was right. If the Consortium was really after them, they needed to be prepared. But the thought of staying in this warehouse, of being trapped here with Hawk… It made her stomach churn.

She glanced at Fenn. He didn't like this any more than she did. But what choice did they have?

"Okay," she said finally, her voice barely above a whisper. "We'll stay. But only until we figure out our next move."

Relief flashed across Hawk's handsome features. "Thank you. I know this isn't easy for you."

"That's an understatement."

"Are you okay with this?" she asked Fenn.

"I don't like it. But I trust you. If you think this is what we need to do, then I'm with you."

Like a true partner. She reached out, taking his hand in hers. "Thank you," she whispered, then she turned back to Hawk, her expression hardening. "Let's get to work. What do we need to do to fortify this place?"

Hawk nodded, a glimmer of his old determination shining through. "We need to secure the perimeter, make sure all the entrances are locked down, and inventory our supplies. See what we have to work with."

She nodded dully. It was going to be a long night.

"I'll check things out," Fenn announced. His footsteps echoed through the vast space as he headed out into the warehouse, his shoulders set with determination.

This wasn't how she'd imagined she would feel finding out that the first love of her life wasn't dead. That she hadn't actually had a hand in destroying him.

She kicked at a stray piece of debris on the floor, sending it skittering across the concrete. The sound echoed in the empty space, making her feel even more alone. And now Fenn was retreating, sliding back behind his charming, witty, sarcastic armor. She could feel him pulling away, putting distance between them.

It was another dead relationship she could take the blame for. Another person she'd pushed away. Another love she'd lost. The thought made her chest ache, a physical pain that took her breath away.