16. Aria

Chapter 16

Aria

Franco just walked out. There is something different between us now that he knows the truth—a respect that wasn't there before he knew. I showered the blood off my body, but I still feel filthy, like what I did will somehow touch my child.

"Aria," my brother says with a groan when I eventually go down to find him where Franco left him. "Help me, please."

"No," I say, not this time. "He didn't kill you, only because he respects me. But if he sees you again, you will not be so lucky." Tears sting the corners of my eyes. I can't do this right now. I'm not sure if it's hormones or I have gone soft being away. I just can't.

"Aria," he begs, and I turn my back on my only family. "Don't turn your back on me, you bitch." His anger slips out, and the true colors shine even in desperation.

"I turned my back long ago, brother." I will decide what to do about this later. He yells, cusses, and spits vulgar words at me until I shut the door and close his voice out of my head and life. Right now, I have to see if my marriage can be saved. Franco and I need some space and time to process the carnage of my lies and the truth that has come out now.

I can't ever outrun my past; I am who I am, and I was foolish to think otherwise. My child faces the same future, born in blood and bound by the rules of omertà . We can never be normal, and we can't ever tell anyone about it. Maybe that's why I fell in love with Franco. Underneath the lies, we understood one another—the obligation to family above all else.

***

It's been days, and the guilt that Franco left his home so I'd be safe is eating at me. That and I miss him, this time he hasn't even called me. I know he checks in with security and that he knows I am safe — but he hasn't reached out to me.

I'm afraid that we have broken this marriage beyond repair, and I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose him, no matter how hard I try; even now, I can't make myself stop loving him. This enormous house feels smaller than a prison cell. The walls are closing in on me, and even a walk in the garden isn't enough. I can't breathe, and it's not just living in captivity. It is Franco. I can't breathe without him; this baby needs a father, and I do not want to do this alone.

"Aria." I hear Giulia downstairs. Her voice is a welcome break in the silence of my own company. "Are you here?"

"Where the fuck would I go? Your brother would kill me if I tried to leave right now. They haven't found Vito." I say, looking down from the upstairs landing. She laughs, and I know at least one other person in my life understands just a little of what has happened. "I'm coming down." Vito—I wish they'd just kill him and be done with it. He's the root of all my problems right now.

"Is there food in this house?" she calls, already on her way into the kitchen. "You are eating for two. Are you taking your vitamins? It's important to look after yourself." I roll my eyes.

"I'm pregnant, not dying," I say to her. "There's food in the fridge, so we can warm something up. I do not want to look like I ate for ten after this, so I will just eat like a normal person. Thanks."

"Stress is bad for babies, and there's been a lot of stress ." I can read between the lines; I know what she means, and it has worried me, too. "Do you want to do yoga or something with me?"

"Guilia, have you ever seen me do yoga? Or something—" I chuckle, and she shrugs. "I am fine. How is Franco?" I know she's seen him, and I need to know he's okay.

"He says he's fine. The apartment looks like a bachelor pad. Takeout is the entire food pyramid, and he's growing a beard." He's miserable. He hates staying in the city. He should be here. I can go somewhere else. This is not fair. "Maybe you should go see him," she suggests.

"He said he wanted space. He hasn't even called me. I don't think he wants to see me," I say with a heavy heart. "I'm not sure we are ready to face all of the stuff between us yet."

"Stuff is a creative way to describe it." She laughs at me. "He misses you, Aria, and he's an idiot when it comes to feelings. Go and see him, take him a proper meal, talk to him." Guilia is so na?ve in many ways. She's not been tainted by her family. Her heart is still golden.

"If he wanted to talk to me, he'd call," I say.

"God, you two are both so fucking stubborn," she says. "Aria, my brother loves you. He misses you, and he's miserable without you. He is too proud, stubborn and stupid to admit all that, so he is hiding away." Guilia is blunt now. "One of you has to cave and talk first. If you wait for him, your child will be graduating college."

I know she is right about all of it. We are both stubborn and hiding from the truth. We're miserable. "I don't know."

"It's easy. You can go see him tonight. Have some nice food, and talk." She smiles. "Maybe don't talk. I don't know, but the man is a wreck without you." I'm a wreck without him, but together, we are something far worse, and I'm not sure that's worth it.

"I can't even go buy baby clothes, and you think a trip across the city is going to happen?" I'm not allowed to go anywhere. It's not safe.

"I heard you killed three guys," she says as if it's not murder, just yoga or something. "I'll take you to his apartment, and I'm pretty sure anyone who gets between you two will end up dead, so it's fine." Guilia is full of mischief and loves to meddle.

"Okay." I give up, knowing he'll not come to me. "But you have to help me," I say. Guilia claps her hands and pulls out her phone.

"We will order from his favorite place, and I will get maid service in there today. The place looks like a pigsty." She's the sibling I never really had—my brother never cared enough to help me do anything. I have not just fallen in love with Franco but with his family, too. Well, not Marco. He isn't very lovable. He's a lot like my brother.

"You are presuming he will even let me in the door."

"I have a key," she says. "You know he can't say no to you. But maybe another outfit, something sexier?"

"Nothing fits me." I sigh; my changing body has somewhat killed my confidence. "This is as sexy as it gets right now."

"It will not do." She frowns. "I have a shopper who can fix this hot mess." Guilia sends a text, then snaps a photo of me, and I'm sure it breaks the camera. "There, she'll send some things over for you."

"Thanks, I think." She passes me a plate of reheated chicken and vegetables. "I'm scared that we can't make this work," I admit to her.

"You love him. He loves you." I nod. "Then it already works. My parents were a train wreck, but they loved one another. It was enough." I worry I am not enough to be a wife or a mom.

"There's a whole lot more than just enough needed, though."

"Why?" she asks. "Don't make it complicated in your head." Guilia pokes me in the chest. "Use that." My dumbass heart got me into this tangle. I'm not about to trust it won't fuck it up more now.

** *

I have Giulia's key in my hand, but I knock first. I am hoping that this wasn't a huge mistake. My sweaty palms and the knot in my stomach are all signs I should just turn and leave.

Five more seconds, then I'll just go. He's probably not here anyway.

The door handle shakes, then it opens, and a rough-looking Franco greets me through the gap. "Aria," he says, "what are you doing here?"

"Can I come in?" I ask, feeling exposed in the hallway. "I have ordered dinner for us, and I think we need to talk. Enough space and time. I miss you, Franco." I'm honest with him. There's nothing left to hide.

Franco opens the door for me to come inside. He looks exhausted. "I miss you too," he says softly, but I hear it and my heart flutters. There's hope for us. I turn around to face him, overwhelmed by how good it feels to be near him again. I can't hold back—I don't want to.

Before I can, Franco grabs me and pulls me into him, kissing me like it's the first and last time all at once. "Franco," I moan. His touch sets me on fire. It's as if we were never apart, my body remembers his, and it craves more right away. We barely make it into the apartment before we pull each other's clothing off.

There's no talking, and words can't express what is being said because we desperately need one another. Franco pulls the dress, I carefully chose, over my head. He tosses it to the floor before his lips find mine again .

"Aria," he grunts between kisses. Why does this voice do that to me? He could say almost anything, and I'll get turned on. "Bend over," he says, positioning me over the arm of the plush suede sofa. He takes a fistful of my ass in hand, nothing gentle or soft.

He kneads my ass cheeks like dough before beginning to kiss the small of my back and working his way up, inch by inch. His hands move in time with his warm lips as the trio seems to be swallowing me from behind. His rough but firm hands leave no doubt as to his intentions as his mouth goes from gentle nibbles to bites and licks from his broad, velvety tongue.

His hands reach around my quivering body to take my red, hot, aching nipples between his thumbs and forefingers just as he begins to bite the back of my neck and the base of my hairline. His mouth is only matched by his dexterous hands as they tag team my body into pleading submission.

He rubs his hard cock against my clit and lines his hairy powerful legs behind me. I push myself into him as my pussy aches for him. My lips are warm and wet, welcoming him, imploring him to take me. He resists. He tortures me with long, slow thrusts without entering me. He eventually pushes the bulbous head of his cock into me but doesn't enter me.

He moves his hips and legs to let the shaft part my lips while he rotates himself, and his head pounds into the top of me. I cry out in ecstasy as my entire body screams to be possessed by him, by this exquisite torturer. I rest my head on the seat of the sofa and use the leverage to wrap my legs around his calf muscles.

"Please!" The voice is my own but unrecognizable. "Please!" I thirst for him. My eyes begin to tear up as agony and desire explode and demand to be satiated .

He slides into me and then pulls out and then again until I can take no more, and I use my legs and muscles to hold him inside. I move to return the favor and hear a soft, demanding groan escape his lips as he nibbles my shoulders and between the blades. It's my turn to return the favor, and I use the muscles of my vagina to milk him and hold him.

"Oh God. Please, God!" Two can play this game.

I release him, and he begins the slow, powerful thrusts that will swallow us both. His shaft slips in and out of me in spasms, and his balls pound into my clitoris. He wraps his arms around me and pulls me firmly towards me, his lips never leaving my skin. His free hand snakes its way to my mound, where it begins to assist his cock and balls at the top of my vulva. He's hitting every area at once, and wave after wave of lightning courses through me and out through my soles and head. My eyes turn upwards in my head as I'm swept away by the river of pleasure.