Chapter 58

My life is studying.Okay, not entirely. I eat sometimes (while studying). I take a piss (sometimes while studying). I sleep a little. But mostly, I study.

I go to the hospital library every night and read through my textbooks until my eyelids are like lead. Then I head home, where I study some more. It's hard. But my grades make it worth it.

Sasha is often at the library as late as I am. At first, she sat at the far left corner of the library while I was on the far right. But then I moved to the left corner because it was closer to the anatomy textbooks in the library. I'm guessing that's why she chose that corner too.

The medical student lounge has free coffee, and usually, Sasha would go downstairs to get a cup every night at around eleven o'clock. Eventually, she started bringing me a cup too. Black—cream and sugar are for losers. I'd die without coffee.

"Don't you ever go home?" I ask her one Friday night in the library.

"Don't you?" she retorts.

I wink at her. "I think it's pretty obvious that I don't."

Sasha smiles. "I just want to be a good doctor."

She's holding the anatomy textbook in her hands. Her hands are so damn tiny, it's almost weird. The book is so heavy that I can see her fingers shaking. If Abe were here, he'd offer to carry the book for her, but that's not my style. Still, the truth is, I'm pretty into Sasha. She's not hot in an obvious way, but I dig that about her. She's been replacing Rachel in my fantasies lately. Some guys get intimidated, but I've always thought smart girls were extremely sexy.

"Why do you want to be a doctor anyway?" I ask.

Sasha raises an eyebrow. "Is your next question about how I'd change the health care system in America?"

I laugh. "No, I'm serious. I don't want your bullshit med school interview answer. I mean, everyone's got a reason for being here, right?"

"What's your reason?" Sasha asks.

"Money, power, and respect," I reply without hesitation. "Not necessarily in that order. Although at the interview, I think I said something along the lines of ‘wanting to help people' or some crap like that." I smirk. "Okay, your turn."

"My father had Parkinson's disease," Sasha says. "He got it young and died a year before I started medical school."

I frown. "I'm sorry."

"His care was completely mismanaged," Sasha goes on. "It took him a long time to even get diagnosed, and then it seemed like we were being shuffled from one rude doctor to another. I want to become the one doctor who could have helped him."

I take a long sip of my coffee. "Christ, Sasha… That's a terrible story."

She's tearing up now. Shit, I hate it when girls cry. I never know what the hell to do.

So I kiss her.

Five minutes later, we're ripping each other's clothes off in the deserted medical student locker room. It's been a long time for me. I can't get enough of Sasha's bare skin and her tiny, sexy body shoved against me. She smells like flowers and coffee. For some reason, the smell of coffee is turning me on—go figure.

"Condom?" Sasha whispers between kisses.

"Yeah, hang on…" I mutter. I grab my abandoned jeans and retrieve my wallet from the back pocket. Ever since high school, I always carry an emergency condom. I'm careful to replace the condom after I use it, which has sadly been a rare occasion lately.

The sex is quick, but (in my humble opinion) pretty damn good. With everything I put into my studying lately, I don't have the stamina for a marathon. And especially not on the cold, hard floor of the locker room. When it's over, I toss the condom in the garbage. If anyone sees it there, they're going to be pretty amused.

Then we get dressed in silence. I watch Sasha doing up the buttons on her blouse with her tiny little fingers while I grin like an idiot. I can't help myself—that was so awesome.

But this is just sex to her. Nothing more. Just a release for two people who have done nothing but study for a full month.