Chapter 31
Dawson
The first dayon the job at the firehouse, I was terrified. The training I'd endured, all the stories I'd been told, none of it would hold a candle to the first time I'd run into a burning building, nothing could truly prepare me. It was a baptism in fire, so to speak.
However, like most of those big moments in my life, I faced the fire with courage, and I refused to let my fear control me. I needed to learn how to use it to my advantage, and I had.
But that was nothing compared to the ledge I found myself on, tethered to Nolan's hand like he was a life raft, and I was in water over my head.
"Please, don't go. I... I need you." I said the words slowly, tasting them on my tongue for the first time.
I hated that I sounded so fucking desperate.
So weak.
But it was the goddamn truth, and the levity of that truth hit me like a ton of bricks as I grasped Nolan's hand. He turned to face me, and I expected to see pity, or judgment even. But that wasn't what I saw at all.
In fact, the glaze in Nolan's eyes looked as pained as I felt, and as if he was going to cry.
Please don't cry, champ.
"I don't want to leave, I..." His voice shook, but he took a step closer. "Why is this so fucking complicated?" he said, his voice cracking like the edges of my heart.
I took a step closer to him, feeling as if the earth beneath me was moving, shifting us toward one another like tectonic plates.
"Things don't have to be complicated, you know," I said, rubbing my thumb over the edge of his knuckles.
Nolan let out a sigh.
"They just have to be honest."
Nolan squeezed my hand tightly. The silence between us felt like an eternity until he'd spoken.
"In all honesty... I think I'm falling in love with you," he said softly, his voice barely a whisper.
My entire body softened at his words, a strange sense of relief flooding me.
I moved closer, catching his gaze. He looked as terrified as I felt, and something about that made me feel emboldened, ready to take on a new kind of fire.
The one that was spreading between us.
And I didn't want to put it out. I wanted it to consume me, consume us.
"In all honesty, Nolan... I think I fell in love with you when you beat me at that fucking race," I said as he closed the space between us.
I reached out to push his hair behind his ear, a motion that made his frames a bit crooked, but I couldn't deny it wasn't sexy.
Nolan stared up at me with glassy eyes, pouty lips, and love.
And that was all I needed.
I leaned in and kissed him, letting the fire within my blood spread. Nolan's hands slid over my hips as his fingers dug into my sides, his lips moving slowly against mine in a torturous fashion that only made me want more.
I wanted all of Nolan fucking Harding, and I didn't care how complicated things were, or that we worked together, or that he knew how to get under my skin.
I only cared about the fact that the thought of not having him made me feel like I had the day I faced my first fire.
Scared.
I didn't want to lose Nolan. I'd fight like hell to keep him, and the way he touched me, kissed me, tugged at my shirt, told me he needed this too.
He needed me just as much as I needed him.
So, I let him pull my shirt off, let him run his hands over my muscles as I slid my hands down the waistband of my sweatpants he seemed to favor wearing.
I guided us through the kitchen into the hallway, the two of us hurriedly trying to undress one another as if we'd die without direct skin to skin contact.
My back slammed against the wall just outside my bedroom, pieces of clothing littered along my hallway like breadcrumbs in a forest. His lips caressed mine before moving to my jaw, and I couldn't help the groan that escaped my throat, or the involuntary thrust of my hips against his rigid cock.
"I'm sorry," I moaned into his neck, my fingertips shoving at his sweatpants and underwear.
"I'm sorry, too," he purred as his fingers quickly made a go at unlatching my belt. My cock throbbed beneath the constraining fabric, anticipating his touch.
The words that came out of my mouth belonged to me, but they were foreign to my ears. I'd never said them to anyone before.
"Guess you could say I've been a bad boy, huh, champ?" I murmured.
Nolan stopped his ministrations and looked up at me from beneath his glasses.
There was only a moment of hesitation in his eyes, before the sparkle of understanding and the spark of lust took hold.
Please punish me with that big beautiful cock of yours... Make it hurt.
"Yes, you have..." he growled, licking his lips, his entire demeanor shifting. "You have been... very bad." He said the words as if they were another language, one he'd only just started learning.
We'll have to work on the delivery a bit.
"How bad?" I purred as I grabbed him by the hips, pulling him into my bedroom, shaking myself out of my pants. Nolan did the same, stepping out of the sweatpants, the light illuminating his cock like the true gift it was.
Nolan pushed me back against the bed, bringing his lips down to my ear. His breath on my skin was hot, causing my cock to twitch against his as he pressed himself against me.
"Bad enough I think you need to be taught a lesson," he whispered, his voice a little more comfortable.
I could feel myself starting to leak already just from the sheer magnitude of his weight, the lust in his voice... and the reality that I was giving him control in this situation was not lost on me.
But I trusted Nolan. I loved him, and that was all the courage I needed as I let my guard down completely.
"My safeword is ice cream," I said.
Nolan raised an eyebrow. "What?" he asked in surprise, completely breaking character in a way that was somehow just as endearing as it was humorous.
"I don't like ice cream," I said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
"You are a disgrace. Everyone likes ice cream," he chortled.
I pulled him closer as we fell back onto my bed, wrapping my leg around his hip as I thrust my cock against his.
"Just add it to my list of things you hate about me," I whispered.
Nolan smirked. "It's a long list, Dawson," he said, and he brought his lips to mine.
"Then start tallying up my punishments, baby," I breathed into his mouth.
Nolan smiled devilishly as he broke away.
"And you say I'm the one who's a brat," he teased as he stepped away, leaving me exposed on my bed.
I leaned back on my elbows, planting my feet on the edge of the bed as I stared him down. My heart thudded in my chest so loud I could hear it like an echo in the otherwise silent air.
"What are you waiting for?" I asked, impatiently.
"To wake up from this dream any minute," he murmured as he took his palm to his cock.
I watched as he lazily stroked himself, his gaze on me heated and full of fire. "I'm waiting," I said, egging him on.
Nolan shook his head as he kneeled before me, looking as innocent as ever as he dove between my legs, taking my cock in his hand. His gaze sparkled with mischief.
"Oh, I'll teach you a thing or two about waiting, Dawson. I've waited for this moment, for two fucking years."
Before I could speak, Nolan took my cock into the back of his throat in one, swift motion, his tongue sliding along my shaft. Within one motion, he slid right off, and my cock throbbed, irritated to high hell that the warm mouth we'd just been in was no more.
"Fucking tease," I growled.
Nolan slid one finger in his mouth suggestively, licking and sucking as if he wished it were my cock, which only aggravated me. Then I watched him do the same to another finger, moaning and making a show of it as I reached for my cock, but he only used his other hand to smack me away.
Then he smacked my cock.
The bounce of my damn cock felt the sting, but I wanted more.
"Is that all you got?" I taunted him.
Nolan took me back in his mouth at the same time he slid one finger into my tight hole. Even though I expected the burn, it still hurt. I wasn't nearly ready enough, but I wanted it.
I wanted to be owned by Nolan, and then I wanted to own him in return.
Mine, mine, mine.
The familiar feeling of my orgasm started to swell, and I fought to thrust myself into Nolan's mouth.
"Fuck, I'm close..." I breathed out, and that's when Nolan stopped. He removed his mouth and his fingers, leaving me tingling, thrusting into the air.
Oh no...
"Good boys get rewards, Dawson. And you haven't been very good," he said haughtily as he straddled me where I lay. My cock ached, wet and ready to come.
Nolan slid his cock against mine, taking hold of both of us in his fist, squeezing. His fingertips smoothed my precum over both of our heads, and I groaned in agony. I tried to thrust, but his legs held me down.
"Please, please... I'll be good, I promise," I huffed out indignantly.
"You promise, huh?" he taunted me.
I wanted to come so bad, but I couldn't deny I was loving every minute of this.
I was loving Nolan in this role, and I didn't want to end the experience.
Nolan slid his fingers back into my hole, building a rhythm as he ground his cock against mine, making me sweat.
"Yes," I huffed. "I promise, just let me come, please..." I begged.
This feels so fucking good...
I'd never been in this position before. Usually, I was the one in charge in the bedroom and my former lovers preferred it that way, and for a long time I did too.
But there was something freeing about being at Nolan's mercy. About giving him this control over me and my body.
Which is probably why in the wild state of my lust I said what I did next.
"Fuck me," I whined like a goddamn porno.
Nolan slowed his thrusts, his eyes meeting mine with surprise.
"I mean... unless you don't want to," I said rapidly.
"Ummm... I want to, it's just... I've... never done it. Topped someone, I mean."
Of course, we probably should have had a conversation about this, but hell... Nolan and I seemed to be born in the fire.
"Well, if it makes you feel any better, champ, I've never bottomed," I said, licking my lips. "I never wanted anyone to top me, until I met you."
Nolan's eyebrows furrowed for a moment as he let go of my cock, pulling his fingers out of me, and for a minute I thought he was going to say no.
He nodded, his eyelashes fluttering as he pursed his lips.
"What if I'm no good at it?" Nolan said with a raised eyebrow.
I sat up for a moment, pulling him between my legs, letting my fingers trace over the flesh of his ass, of his seam.
"I think you'll be very good, Nolan," I said softly. "Just channel all that hate and waiting and I think you'll be just fine." His cock was right at my mouth level, so I didn't waste the chance to lick the salty liquid gleaming at his slit. I enjoyed watching his entire body shudder.
"Okay..." he said as he took a breath, his eyelids falling shut from my tongue swipe for a moment before he opened them, peering at me with a boldness that only made me want his fury more.
"Lube?" he asked, his voice bolder.
I sucked at the head of his cock before answering, eliciting a tiny whimper from him.
"Top drawer," I responded, before taking his entire cock in my mouth.
Nolan pulled back, the sound of the cap popping echoing in the room.
"Okay, lean back," he instructed methodically.
I obeyed without question, my nerves starting to circulate as reality hit. Right before two cold, wet fingers wedged themselves in my hole again, this time sliding in with ease as they built a rhythm. My head fell back instantly as ecstasy coursed through me, and then Nolan slid a third finger in. The stretch was good, but I needed more.
I needed Nolan and his big, beautiful cock to fucking own me.
"Are you ready?" he asked, his voice full of desire and anxiety.
I nodded, my eyes closing in ecstasy.
"Yes," I said. "Teach me a goddamn lesson, Nolan."
There was a brief moment where I thought he might have reconsidered, but when I felt the tip of his cock pressing against my slick entrance, nothing else mattered.
He took it slow, inch by inch and the stretch felt fucking amazing. And then he slid in the last few inches and my insides clutched him like a vice. A deep groan escaped both of us, and immediately Nolan's head buried itself into my shoulder.
"Fuck that feels good," he whined. "You feel really good."
I slid my legs around his hips, the motion driving him in deeper.
"You feel really good, champ," I said through my teeth, and I fucking meant it.
I felt so fucking full.
Of excitement, of relief, of love... and cock.
Nolan's chest rose and fell against mine as he gently bucked his hips, the movement shooting pleasure through my damn spine. I needed more. I was so freaking close to coming.
"Look at me," I ordered, sliding my hands in Nolan's silky locks. He followed my touch as I turned his head toward me.
Nolan rocked his hips into me a little faster, and I lost myself in the feel of him filling me to the brim, the weight of his body on mine, and the way he was looking at me.
The words fell out of my mouth of their own volition.
"I love you," I said, my cock sliding against his abs torturously, leaving sticky trails on his skin.
Nolan leaned down and took my lips like a damn prayer.
"I love you too, asshole," he whispered, both of us toppling over the edge into ecstasy. His thrusts halted as warmth spread within me, his hot release filling me and spilling out of me as he drove his tongue down my throat.
My cock pulsed as I came hard and fast against his abdomen, painting his skin in my sweet release.
I wrapped my arms around Nolan and held onto him for dear life as we came together like a well-oiled machine.
And when we'd finally disconnected, I'd never felt more whole.