Julianna

Irubbed my forehead with my fingers where a headache was building. I knew I shouldn't have reported this. I glanced up from where I sat behind my father's desk, Espinoza sitting on my right. "I said I'm fine."

"You're fine?" my father repeated, his voice hard and rattling with fury. "Julianna, somebody tried to kidnap you."

"But they didn't succeed, did they? I'm sitting right here."

"Sitting right there with a bruise on your jaw the size of Texas." My father exhaled so loudly it reminded me of a bull.

My jaw let out a throb as if to agree with him.

"Do you have any ideas on who would be behind this?" Espo asked. It was the first thing he'd said since I'd revealed last night's drama.

Goldfish. Whoever that was. "I don't know."

"I bet it's the goddamn Tyrells," my father said, emphasizing his words with a fist slamming on the desk.

I stared at him, indignation at his prejudice tightening my grip on my chair arm. The Tyrells couldn't have done this. Roman was the one who saved me.

A worm of doubt threaded through my stomach. What if his father or someone else in their organization was doing this behind Roman's back? It was possible.

Or Roman's playing you, a small voice said inside me. He organized his men to try to kidnap you so he could come in like a hero. Do you really believe he just happened to be there?

I shoved that voice down. I didn't care how stupid it sounded, I knew Roman. He wouldn't harm me.

"Why would the Tyrells do it?" I asked.

"The Tyrells have a vested interest in you because of your investigation into Vinnie's murder case."

"Which stalled. They know that. What did they have to gain by kidnapping me? It would be a stupid move on their part."

My father's chair creaked as he sank back into it. "I'll have a plainclothes officer stationed at your apartment building while you're off duty."

I could feel the protective walls clanging up around me, just as they had for the years after my mother died. My father had gotten so strict and paranoid he barely let me out of the house then.

How would you see Roman again if you were being watched?

I shoved that inappropriate thought aside. "I don't need a bodyguard," I said firmly, "I have a gun."

"If somebody's trying to kidnap you?—"

"It was probably a random attack," I lied. I hadn't told them about the attempted rape.

"And if it wasn't?"

"I managed to thwart the attempt last night, I will thwart the next one if it comes." My voice began to rise. "I will not be made a prisoner." Again.

My father looked at Espo, obviously trying to garner some support.

I stared at him with my own unspoken plea. Please, Espo. Don't let him cage me.

Espo took his time in speaking. "Obviously when she is at work, I'm with her," he said. "Julianna's building is secure. As long as I escort her home after work every day and she doesn't go out alone at night, I don't see why she needs a protective guard. There's no evidence that Julianna was even targeted."

I had lied to them. I had told them that I had saved myself. I'd made myself sound like a regular G.I. Jane when in fact it was Roman who had been the hero last night. I wondered for a second what they would say if I told them the truth.

Probably have me committed.

My father sank his face into his hand and rubbed at his forehead.

"I'll be careful, I promise," I said. "Besides, I know you're short-staffed. You don't have a man spare to guard me. How would it look to voters if you took a uniform off his normal duties to play my shadow because of one random attack?"

My father leveled his stare at me. His lips pressed together. He didn't like it but I could see the resignation on his face. "Don't go around alone at night again, okay? I'll come to your place for dinner from now on."

I nodded, relieved that I had managed to escape with my freedom. Espo and I stood to leave.

"Espinoza, can I have a moment alone with my daughter, please?"

Espo nodded and left the room. I lowered myself back into the seat, my nerves jumping with anticipation. What did he want to talk to me about?

Does he not believe my story?

My father sank back in his chair, his amber eyes watching me carefully from under his bushy brows. Suddenly he seemed so much older now than I remembered him ever being. I could see the weariness in the bags under his eyes, in the permanent crease between his brows. This job was a set of thick chains slung across his shoulders, weighing them down.

He finally spoke. "I promised your mother that I would look after you. That I would raise you right. Protect you when you needed it." He let out a soft laugh devoid of any amusement. "I don't know whether I've done a very good job."

I straightened in my chair. I wanted to launch from my seat, run around the desk and throw my arms around him. That's not how our relationship worked. "You did the best job a father could do. But I'm not a little girl anymore. Some things I need to take care of myself. Some things I need to decide for myself."

For some reason, I thought of last night when I let Roman into my bed.

Some mistakes I needed to make by myself.

* * *

When I finished work,Espo drove me home. I tried talking to him on the way but he answered in monosyllables. I knew something was up.

He pulled up outside my apartment building.

"You gonna tell me what's up or do I have to beat it out of you?" I said with a light teasing note to my voice.

Espo glanced at me out of the corner of his eye and pursed his lips. "You gonna tell me what really happened last night or do I have to beat it out of you?"

I froze. He knew something. I forced a confused look on my face. "I don't know what you're talking about."

He turned his torso to face me completely. "You're telling me you fought off two grown men with just your fists and your gun. And they both happened to get away before you could cuff them."

I gritted my teeth. "Just because I'm a woman doesn't make me helpless. You of all people know that I can take down a grown man larger than me."

"A grown man, yes. Two? That would've been a miracle."

"Oh ye of little faith."

"Don't give me that. I know when you're lying."

"I'm not lying."

"You know, a dirtbag by the name of Tate Jackson was found with his neck broken a few blocks down from where you said you'd been attacked."

"Oh yeah? What's that got to do with me?"

"You sure you were just off Grosvenor Road when they jumped you?"

"I am."

"It was dark. You could have mistaken the road you took back to your apartment."

"I'm not mistaken," I said through gritted teeth.

He let out a breath. "Okay. Whatever. You don't want to tell me what really happened, that's fine. I'm only your partner."

Way to lay down the guilt, Espo."I told you everything. There's nothing else to tell."

Espo stared for me for a long moment, a hard pinch to the skin around his mouth. "Fine." The tone of his voice told me it was not fine. "See you tomorrow, partner."

I felt like I'd been punched in the chest. I got out of the car, making sure to slam the door hard behind me, and walked into my apartment building without looking back.

Damn you, Roman, for coming into my life and messing it all up. Now I was outright lying to my father, my friends and my partner. My partner now suspected that something was up with me. I didn't know how much longer I could keep hiding secrets from them. I just hoped that when it all came out, when it all blew up in my face, no one I cared about got hurt.