20. Gertrude

20

GERTRUDE

G ertrude nearly dropped the spatula she was using to fold the omelet. The implication in his words was clear—he wanted them to move in together.

How should she respond?

She wanted to say yes, that there was nothing she would love more than waking next to him each morning and seeing his smile when she opened her eyes, but her practical mind was throwing up warning flags.

They hadn't even said 'I love you' yet. What if their relationship failed?

It would be heart-wrenching having to untangle their lives with him living in the village, but if they'd also moved in together, it would be a nightmare.

Then again, nothing good came without effort or risk, and fear shouldn't stop her from reaching for what she wanted.

Taking a deep breath, Gertrude turned off the stove and transferred the omelet to a plate. She brought it to the table, then poured herself a fresh cup of coffee before sitting down across from Rob.

"You gave me the impression that you wanted to wait until after your transition before making major decisions," she said.

"I did, but I find it significant that you brought me here after the ceremony and not to Toven and Mia's house. You felt like I was your responsibility and not theirs."

"Well, yeah. You are my…what?" Gertrude wrapped her hands around her coffee cup, using the warmth to steady herself. "Boyfriend? Significant other? What are we to each other?"

He swallowed. "Mates?"

"Are we? I'm not saying that we aren't. We might be. I just feel like we are rushing in headfirst, and we might regret it later."

He nodded. "I know, and I'd rather we weighed every decision carefully. Forget that I brought it up. We should wait until after my transition."

They were both cowards, hiding behind excuses to protect their fragile hearts. They had both been hurt, and both had been left for others, but Rob had had it much worse than she had, and if he was brave enough to even hint at taking their relationship to the next step, she should encourage him and not put up roadblocks.

Gertrude took a sip of coffee, giving herself a moment longer to think. "We haven't even said those three important words to each other yet, and here we are discussing moving in together. I think things need to be done in order."

He reached across the table, covering her hand with his. "I love you, Gertrude. I wish I was more romantic and had gotten you roses and chocolates, but knowing myself, I would have probably obsessed over it forever until it became such a huge mountain to scale that I would have given up on it altogether. So, maybe it's better that I said it now, spontaneously, over breakfast, with this beautiful omelet we can share instead of a box of chocolates."

She just gaped at him, not knowing whether she should laugh or cry or pick him up and carry him to the bedroom. Well, maybe she should let him carry her because his masculinity might be threatened by her doing that.

He squeezed her hand. "Say something. You are freaking me out."

"I love you too."

A bright smile spread over his face. "See? That wasn't so hard, was it?"

"It was," she whispered. "I've never said that to a man before. "

"Oh, Gertrude." He rose to his feet, lifted her up, and sat back down with her in his arms.

It felt so good, so right, that tears prickled the back of her eyes. "I love you. I've known that for a while now, but I was afraid to say it."

"Same here." He rubbed soothing circles on her back. "I fell in love with you by the second time I met you."

She lifted her head and pouted. "Why not the first?"

"Because I wasn't ready yet. If I hadn't felt so ruined, I would have fallen in love with you at first sight. I'm sure of that."

Her heart squeezed. "Oh, Rob."

"I know it's fast, but being with you feels right in a way nothing else ever has."

She took a deep breath. "It's easy to get swept away in the moment, but things might not work out between us, and separating after moving in together is going to be hell."

"We are not going to separate," he said almost vehemently. "The only way you'll get rid of me is if you tell me to leave, cheat on me, or lie to me, and I know that you won't do any of those things because that's not who you are."

"What if you are the one who wants to get rid of me for some reason?"

The possible reason being his truelove mate suddenly appearing out of nowhere, like Margo had appeared for Negal. It hurt when Negal dumped her without looking back, but it would slay her if Rob did that as well.

Then again, it wouldn't matter if they lived together or not when it happened. It would be devastating in either case.

No, that wasn't true. It would be much worse if they shared a house.

"We're perfect for each other, and we're wasting time being afraid." He squeezed her hand. "Let's take a chance on each other."

She met his eyes. "I've lived a long time, Rob. Long enough to know that nothing worth having comes without risk and that it's important to weigh those risks against the benefits."

"Now, you are talking my language." His thumb traced patterns on her palm. "In this case, the benefits far outweigh the risks, and I'm willing to bet everything on you."

"That's so sweet of you to say." She chuckled. "You make it sound so simple."

"Because it is." He smiled. "We love each other. We want to be together. And the odds are in our favor."

Gertrude shook her head, but she couldn't stop smiling. "We should at least wait until after the wedding. I need to talk to Hildegard and ask her if it's okay with her for you to move in with us."

He tilted his head. "Shouldn't we just take the plunge and request a house of our own?"

Her heart skipped a beat at his suggestion. He was even more serious about this than she'd thought. "Perhaps after your transition, we will do that. I'm not a big risk taker, and I prefer small steps."

"Fair enough." He lifted her hand to his lips. "But as soon as I'm past the initial stage of my transition, we are moving in together one way or another. I don't care if it's with Hildegard remaining as our roommate, her moving out to room with someone else, or us marching into Ingrid's office and asking her for a house."

"Deal." She cupped his cheeks and sealed the deal with a kiss.