Chapter 15

Arya

"Can you believe it's almost Thanksgiving already?" Ashlyn pointed to the banner hanging above the entrance to the dining hall that read: THANKSGIVING FEAST WEDNESDAY.

I turned away from putting the finishing touches on my bio essay on my tablet and glanced in that direction. I had been trying not to notice the damn thing all day. I didn't like the reminder of how much time had passed since Mom died or that I'd be spending my first holiday without her.

"I feel like this semester has taken a really, really long time," Ashlyn went on, "but somehow, I still can't believe Thanksgiving is in two days."

"I know what you mean," I said. "It definitely doesn't feel like a holiday's coming up."

Knowing that a holiday was around the corner made Mom's absence that much more tangible.

"It's nice of the school to do this feast thing the night before, though, to get us in the mood," Ashlyn said, idly flipping the pages of her textbook with the pad of her thumb. "Are you staying here for the long weekend?"

My throat constricted. All the other students had families to go home to for their celebrations. I had no one and no home to go to. Shea had graciously invited me to join her and her Gram for dinner, and while I knew I should accept to keep from dwelling on my own loneliness, I hadn't been able to bring myself to say yes.

I shrugged and looked back down at my screen. "Eh, I don't know. But probably."

She looked at me in that way I hated. That look that said, "Poor Arya."

What about you?" I asked, quickly getting the subject off myself. "Spending Thanksgiving with your dad?"

"Unfortunately." Ashlyn sighed and leaned back in her chair. "He wants us to ‘bond'"—she air quoted with her fingers—"in a non-school environment. But I'm free on Black Friday! Want to join me in the craziness of pre-Christmas shopping?"

My mood significantly brightened. "Actually, I would love to! Nothing like a day of splurging with a friend to forget your problems."

Ashlyn slapped a hand on the table. "I know, right? Maybe we can even get our nails done. I'm in desperate need of a manicure." She curled her fingers in front of her and inspected them, her resulting frown offering confirmation of their lackluster.

I snickered, then looked at the nearest clock on the wall. "We'll talk about it later. I gotta go. Letti is not a patient tutor."

"Oh yeah, how's that going by the way?" Ashlyn asked, closing her textbook as I stood up and gathered my things.

"Honestly, not horrible."

It had been three days now that I'd been practicing shifting with Letti. After the first few minutes of each session where we still remembered we hated each other, things progressed pretty well. When Letti wasn't being a nasty, conniving sea witch, she was actually quite helpful. She had a very technical view of her skills, so she was able to explain tasks in a very clear, easy-to-follow way.

I had fully shifted outside of water for the first time yesterday. It didn't last long, and I had to flop into the pool to keep my tail out, but we both considered that a win.

Our goal for this evening's practice was water manipulation.

"I'll see you at dinner," I said as I waved to Ashlyn and headed out of the dining hall.

I hurried to the training room, passing by students who were all excitedly chatting about their Thanksgiving plans. I really had no idea what I was going to do. Going home was absolutely not an option.

While the state was holding the title until I turned eighteen, it did technically belong to me. But it would never feel like home again, not after Mom had been murdered there. Why would I spend four days there alone only to be haunted by those awful memories?

Although, the idea of being the only student in these empty halls for four days straight wasn't exactly appealing either.

There was always Shea's offer. I liked her grandma. She was a sweet lady, and she made amazing food. But the last time I'd seen her, I didn't know she was a witch, and she didn't know I was a mermaid. Things might be different now. While Shea didn't shun me for being a shifter, I didn't know if witches felt the same way about shifters as shifters felt about them. My heart couldn't take any more rejection.

Maybe it was better to stay here. I could curl up on the couch in the mermaid common room and have the TV all to myself for the long weekend.

I put those thoughts on the back burner as I opened the training room door and went inside.

"We're going to have to make this quick, today," Letti said as soon as I walked inside, rolling her thick black hair into a bun. "I'll be leaving early tonight to catch a plane home. Mermaids don't exactly celebrate Thanksgiving, but my parents relish any mandatory days off from school to spoil me."

I scowled at her. I shouldn't have been surprised at her bragging about her parents and rubbing my nose in the fact that I didn't have any, but those words in her snotty tone were like nails scraping down a chalkboard.

My mom might have kept secrets and dragged me all over the country, but at least she taught me how to be a decent person. Growing up, I'd been spoiled with love, not material possessions. I had to earn those things, and I was grateful to Mom for teaching me the true value of things.

So, rather than responding to Letti's bait, I went to change into my swim top. When I came out, she was floating in the pool, making the water jump into the air and twirl around like a ribbon. It was beautiful to watch, though I was a bit irked by Letti showing off.

"You gonna teach me how to do that today?" I asked as I padded barefoot across the tile toward the pool's edge.

Letti snorted. "Not likely, but all I can do is try my best."

I gritted my teeth, thinking it best to ignore the snide remark and get as much as I could from this lesson.

I lowered myself to the floor, ready to slip into the pool.

"Uh-uh, transform first," Letti said. "Until you can shift at will perfectly, you need to practice before getting in the water. Every. Single. Time."

I sighed but did as Letti instructed, hating that she had a valid point. I closed my eyes and put myself in my mental happy place—deep in the heart of a dark blue ocean of my own imagination—willing myself to become what I really was. I imagined the water lovingly caressing my arms and cheeks, filling my lungs as if filling my heart.

And then it started. The bones of my ankles and knees popped and twisted as my legs morphed together, the pain of it forcing me to grimace. Without the aid of the salt water, transforming dry took much longer and was, therefore, more painful. I urged my body to change faster so the pain would end, scrunching my face with the effort. It was excruciating.

The pain caused me to lose my focus, and my legs began to separate.

"Alright, just get in," Letti scoffed with no small amount of irritation.

I plunged into the pool, and the transformation continued through to completion. I was so relieved to be away from that pain but disappointed that I failed to shift without the water's aid.

When my face surfaced, I could tell that Letti had a few belittling things she wanted to say but was holding her tongue, which was actually a pretty impressive feat for her.

"The key to controlling water is to visualize it as an extension of yourself." Letti got right to the point. "If you want to will an ounce of water out of the pool, imagine it's connected to a limb that you just can't see. Like an extra hand. Try it."

I had tried and failed at water manipulation time and again, so I didn't expect this afternoon would be any different. But I closed my eyes and imagined that my hands formed a cup in the pool in front of me, filling with the water. In my mind, I lifted my hands out of the pool, still holding the water, not a drop spilling out.

I peeked through one eye to see if anything was happening. The only thing I saw was Letti's Barbie face pinched in a dubious frown.

"Were you even trying to do anything, or are you, like, having some kind of seizure or something?" Letti asked, her arms crossed under her chest.

I dropped my shoulders and sighed. "A seizure? I'm not mentally handicapped."

"Well, it would sure make a lot of sense if you were," Letti grumbled under her breath.

My fists clenched beneath the water as anger ruffled the scales along my tail. I really wished I could command the water to slap her hard across the face.

"What were you visualizing?" Letti asked. "Tell me exactly."

"I was picturing holding my hands in front of me and forming a cup in the water, then lifting that water out of the pool," I explained.

Letti scoffed. "Ugh. Why can't you follow simple directions? I said imagine the water is a limb, not that limbs you already have are influencing it. You can't see the water as something that is being affected by you, it won't work that way. You have to see it as if it is you. Try again."

The trout triplet was certainly in a rush today. Though she did let slip the occasional insult during sessions, her attitude today was excessive. I was getting ready to say to hell with it and walk out. Let the sea witch run off to her fancy, enabling parents.

But my pride wouldn't let me. I wanted to get this right. I didn't want to kick off the next four days of solitude with more fuel for self-deprecation.

I closed my eyes and tried again.

How was I supposed to make myself believe the water was a part of me? This pool was enormous. Not that I had any kind of weight sensitivity, but being the size of this pool would make me way beyond fat. That wasn't a picture I wanted floating around in my head—my self-esteem was low enough already.

Then something occurred to me. I didn't have to imagine that my body was literally the size of the amount of water I was touching. What if my soul just extended beyond my physical self to also inhabit the water? I definitely felt connected to water, and the part that hadn't clicked until now was that it was a connection beyond the physical.

I visualized myself as my soul just floating in my body, radiating beyond my bones and skin and flowing into the water around me. I imagined feeling the water with my soul instead of my physical senses, and the thought sent a ripple through me.

Concentrating on just the water directly in front of me, I reached my soul forward and upward. A gentle gurgle and splash of water made my eyes pop open. The surface of the water in front of me was waving and rocking.

"All that effort for a tiny water bubble?" Letti mocked. "Well, at least you accomplished something ."

The burst of joy sputtered out at Letti's derisive words.

"What is your problem today?" I snapped. "This is the best I've done in any of our tutoring sessions, and all you can do is shut me down. Don't you get that the closer I get to figuring this stuff out, the closer you get to not having to do this anymore?"

Letti's brows rose, and she looked a bit stymied.

"I get that you're happy to go home, but why is that making you even nastier than usual?" I went on.

She looked away, a bitter expression on her face. "You wouldn't understand."

"You're probably right," I said. "I don't understand how someone who has everything she could want can still spew misery and hatred like an evil volcano."

She shook her head. "I don't have everything."

I frowned at her. "What don't you have—the newest iPhone?"

"I don't have Kendall." Letti said it so quietly that I almost didn't hear it.

"What?" I asked after a moment.

"See, you wouldn't understand," she said, pulling herself out of the pool, "because you have Kendall following you around like a little guppy fish, and you don't even care."

I watched with a stumped expression as Letti stomped into the locker room. This was the first sign of vulnerability I had ever seen in the conceited mermaid, and for a moment, I could almost believe that Letti actually had feelings .

I lifted myself out of the pool, too, and willed my tail to transform back to legs as fast as I could—somehow, that part always came easier than the reverse. Then I rushed into the locker room after her. I didn't know why I was bothering, but I couldn't just let this go.

"Look, I don't know what you and Kendall had before, but I had nothing to do with it ending," I said to Letti as she was changing.

"The hell you didn't!" she snapped, turning on me with her exposed breasts bouncing. "The day you showed up was the day Kendall dumped me."

My brows shot up, both her declaration and the fact that my enemy was topless in front of me making me pause for a moment.

"That doesn't mean it had anything to do with me," I argued when I recovered from the shock of both. "I'm sure it was just a coincidence."

Letti shook her head after pulling her shirt on. "Let me tell you something. When I first started here two years ago, Kendall was just as into me as he seems to be into you. He was so sweet and charming, and it was clear he was trying really hard to get with me. He told me that he dreamt about me, that we were destined to be together. And because he's such a gifted seer, I believed him. He told me we were going to change the world."

She actually looked pretty as she stared off into the distance, reliving her story. Not the plastic pretty she always was, but true pretty, in a girl-next-door kind of way.

But the dream in her eyes faded, and she narrowed them at me. "Then you showed up, and suddenly everything we had together meant nothing. He said he was wrong about me. That I wasn't the girl he thought I was, and that it was over. I didn't understand it—not until I saw him swooning over you the next day. You ruined everything!"

Letti stormed out, and I plopped down onto the bench to process what I just heard.

So that was why Letti and her friends hated me so much. It was absurd. Sure, Kendall had been interested in me from day one, but that didn't mean he would end a two-year relationship because a new girl showed up—one that he didn't even know. That made no sense.

Even though I knew Letti's perception of the situation was distorted by pain, something about this left me with a strange sense of unease, like there was something I should be aware of but was just missing. But then again, that was true of just about everything in my life. There were loads of things I should know that I just kept missing.

I knew it was this big joke around campus that Letti and I looked alike, and I'd always dismissed that. But when I really thought about it, we did have similar features. We were about the same height and build. We both had long, wavy black hair. From behind or at a glance, I could maybe see how one of us could be mistaken for the other.

She said Kendall had dreamt about her, then dumped her when I showed up. Could Kendall's dreams have been about me and not her? And if so, what did that mean ?