Chapter 11

CHAPTER ELEVEN

C illian closed the door and leaned against it. It would kill him, but he would not stand close to her when her inhibitions were so lowered. "What are you doing?" he asked, his voice rougher than he intended.

Jenna smiled, a delicate pink stain spreading from her cheeks down her throat, and her eyes grew more slumberous. "I was curious about your ledgers," she purred. "And I may have had a little bit of your brandy. It is quite good, you know."

She lowered the ledger. "You made some good investments. This year's yield should see an annual return of one thousand pounds."

"You understand investments?"

Her mouth lifted at one corner, a wicked little smile. "What men can do, women can do," she drawled, bracing both hands on the desk and peeking at him from beneath her lashes.

Cillian chuckled. "I agree."

"You do?"

"Yes."

She canted her head. "How adorably progressive."

In all his nine and twenty years, none had ever called him adorable. "Who taught you?"

"Berkeley Square is more than a place where we gather to laugh and gossip. Theo and Lucinda carefully teach us about investments. I have a portfolio with a return of six percent annually."

"That is impressive."

"I know."

Curiosity shifted through him. "What else has 48 Berkeley Square taught you?"

She pouted, looking so damn sensually provocative that he had to look away for a moment.

"Do you wish to pry my secrets from me with so little effort? Tsk! "

How close her voice was had him snapping his gaze up to her to find the damn chit upon him. The door was at his back, and there was nowhere to go. Cillian could only steel himself against the need burning through his body. He inhaled subtly. Why did she always smell this wonderful?

Jenna placed a finger under his chin. "Nervous to be around me, Lord Sallis?"

By God, he was damn well petrified he would lose his damn good senses and take what her eyes offered him. Damn it to hell, not like this!

Her lashes briefly swept down across her cheekbones. "I can feel your heart pounding with want for me."

Cillian almost snarled as he slipped his hand around her waist and hauled her up against his chest. Her eyes were bright with anticipation and lust.

"I am so damn tempted," he hissed.

"To do what?"

"Damn it, Jenna—"

She kissed him, licking his bottom lip, and he groaned, sliding his tongue sinuously against hers in a heated kiss. He shuddered as a wave of pleasure washed through him. He sucked her tongue, kissing her for endless moments.

Their mouths parted, and she whispered achingly against his lips, "What do you want to do, Cillian."

"I want to taste you … everywhere."

"Oh," she said achingly softly. "Are we again discussing the merits of me sliding my puss—"

He kissed the evocative words from her mouth, certain he would act the bounder if he heard anything about her pussy and his face. She whimpered, and he swallowed that sweet, carnal sound, kissing her until they both broke apart, breathing raggedly.

"It's time for you to go to bed."

"Yes."

"To separate beds," he said tightly.

She pouted and then laughed. "It is barely seven. And I am hungry ."

"To the kitchen we go," he said, almost desperately shifting to open the door and escape the temptation.

"There is already a fine spread waiting for us in the dining room. Williamson told me only a few minutes before you entered."

Cillian clasped her hand in his and walked with her down the hallway to the dining room, where supper waited. The cook had outdone herself, evidently wanting to impress their guest with this feast. They were served pigeon soup, stuffed quail, lamb chops with leeks, buttered prawns, baked potatoes with a creamy sauce, and a pudding. He was impressed with Jenna, for she ate more than one serving of each item, her delight with her meal evident. She savored each bite, her eyes closing briefly in pleasure as she tasted the rich, flavorful dishes. Her enjoyment was contagious, and Cillian found himself watching her with a smile as she indulged in the feast.

She drank another glass of wine, and her eyes grew more wickedly carnal with each sip, a sultry gleam that hinted at her thoughts. The way she licked her lips after each bite and the soft hums of satisfaction she made stirred something deep within him.

Cillian shoved back his chair. "Jenna, I have urgent matters to attend. Allow me to—"

Before he could finish his sentence, she lowered her napkin, rose from her chair, and launched herself into his arms. Her movements were impressively nimble, and before he could fully process what was happening, Jenna gripped his shoulders to haul herself up and then wrapped her legs tightly around his waist.

The sudden intimacy of her actions took his breath away. Her body pressed firmly against his, the warmth of her skin seeping through their clothes. Her eyes, filled with a mixture of mischief and desire, locked onto his, leaving him no room for retreat. Her hair cascaded around them like a silken curtain, and the scent of her mingled with the remnants of their meal, creating a heady, intoxicating blend.

"Does this urgent matter pertain to our mutual ravishment?"

"Jenna," he murmured, his voice husky with emotion.

A throat cleared discreetly behind them, and though Jenna's eyes widened and her cheeks turned scarlet, she remained in his arms.

"Yes, Williamson?" Cillian said as if the scene his butler witnessed was an everyday occurrence.

"Lady Jenna's carriage is fixed for whenever the lady is ready."

"How marvelous ; thank you, Williamson," she said sweetly without looking at his butler.

"You are most welcome, my lady," his butler said and withdrew.

Cillian pinned her with a stern stare. "I will ask your lady's maid to attend to you right away, and—"

Jenna smiled a slow, seductive curve of her lips and leaned forward.

"You're not going anywhere, Cillian," she whispered, her breath warm against his ear. "Not until I've had my fill of you."

His cock swelled to a painful, immediate erection in anticipation of being inside her; his mouth watered for the taste of her. How many years had he dreamed of her, needed her, longed for her with every part of him? Yet he could not take her like this. Cillian smoothed his hand over her back, loving the feel of her delicate curves.

"I want you badly, Jenna, more than I have ever wanted another person in this lifetime, but I will not take you tippled."

Her eyes flared, and the pain in her gaze hurt somewhere deep inside of him.

"I do not say this to hurt you," he said gruffly. "I know you drank to shore up your courage for seduction. But then what, Jenna? Will you remember our coming together? Will you remember us in the morning? Do you need to be foxed to convince yourself to be with me?"

Her eyes glistened with tears, and she rested her face in the curve of his throat. It was then he felt the wetness of her tears against his skin.

Ah, Jenna.

Cillian held her tightly, her body wrapped around him like a sensual vine, and made his way from the dining room to his bedchamber upstairs. The manor was quiet; the only sounds were their breathing and the soft rustle of their clothing as he carried her. It was early to retire for the night, and he usually worked long hours into the evening, poring over investment reports and the estate ledgers. But tonight was different.

Reaching his bedchamber, he gently pushed the door open with his shoulder and carried her inside. He went with her onto the bed and lay down, still fully clothed and with his boots on. The bed dipped under their combined weight, the mattress embracing them in a cocoon of comfort. He positioned them so they were comfortable enough, shifting her slightly so she was no longer wrapped around him but still nestled close. Jenna's sobs, quiet and heartbreaking, filled the room. Cillian held her and stroked her hair gently, murmuring soft reassurances, though his heart ached. The rhythmic rise and fall of her breathing gradually slowed, and she fell into sleep.

Cillian continued to hold her. Eventually, the exhaustion of the day caught up with him, and he succumbed to sleep, his body still entwined with hers.

Jenna's lashes fluttered open, and she was lulled by the steady heartbeat beneath her ear. The heavy drapes were drawn, and she could see the shades of gray outside signaling the breaking dawn. The dim light cast a soft glow in the room, casting gentle shadows.

Things slowly came into focus against her senses. How comfortable she was. How safe and protected she felt. The power and heat of the body beneath hers were unmistakable, and the quickening of his heart indicated that Cillian, too, had roused. His arms, still wrapped around her, conveyed a sense of security and warmth. He had clearly held her throughout the night while she slept, never letting go. Her senses were filled with the heady masculine scent of Cillian.

Fragmented memories of the evening before rushed through her thoughts—the dinner, the wine, the passionate intensity in his eyes. Her cheeks burned as she recalled how she had thrown herself into his arms, unable to resist the pull of her emotions and chaotic hunger. She could feel that beneath her gown she wore no chemisette or underdrawers. The recollection of her boldness made her heart race anew, and she felt a mixture of embarrassment and a lingering desire.

Jenna shifted slightly, lifting her head to look at Cillian. His eyes were open, watching her with a mixture of tenderness and piercing intensity. The lines of his face were sensually softened in the dawn's light, and his golden eyes ensnared her.

They did not speak, and Jenna did not want to break the silence. The intimate moment stretched between them, filled with unspoken words and emotions. His eyes glittered, his expression darkening with hunger.

"Reach up and grab the headboard," he murmured, his voice a deep rumble that resonated through his chest. "And place your pussy on my mouth."

Shock stuttered Jenna's heart, and for a moment, she felt faint. Tension tightened low in her belly, and her pulse raced. Yet she slightly arched and crawled up his body to grab onto the headboard. Though she did not complete his provocative command yet, he groaned. The sound slammed into her belly, and her sex ached. Her body felt weighted down and hot. Jenna almost deplored this reaction only Cillian could evoke.

She dragged her legs up, folding her knees so each one bracketed his head. Her gown whispered over them, covering his face. Holding onto the headboard, she peered down. Somehow, it was more erotic that she could not see his face, knowing he was staring at her naked flesh. She felt as if her entire body was throbbing with anticipation, hotly pooling deep inside her sex. Jenna whimpered even though his mouth had not touched her yet. Powerful hands gripped her buttocks and dragged her down. She moaned at the first lick of his tongue over her clitoris, then down to the folds of her quim. Jenna grew so wet she almost felt mortified. Her entire body burned, and Cillian allowed her no escape. His wicked tongue slid through the tender folds of her sex with erotic precision.

Jenna's breath came in shuddering gasps, and a sob rose in her throat when his fingers sunk into her buttocks as he held her against his mouth and sucked on her clitoris. An exquisite pleasure, so intense it was almost painful, shot through her body. She cried out at the heated sensation twisting low in her belly.

"Cillian," she sobbed his name, undulating her hips as the piercing sensations built and overwhelmed her senses.

He alternately sucked on her nub of pleasure until she thought she would expire from the exquisite torment, then glided his tongue lower, devastating her with slow licks. She moaned helplessly with pleasure, trembling under the breathtaking assault of his erotic kiss against her intimate flesh.

Her breasts ached, her nipples hardening to firm peaks that rasped almost painfully against her gown. Heat twisted like a coil in her belly, drawing so tight she started to tremble.

"Cillian, please!" she cried out when she tried to jerk her hips from his mouth to escape the piercing sensation, and he did not allow her.

His hands tightened on her buttocks as he held her to his mouth.

"Cillian!"

Her lover raked his teeth over her clitoris and sucked, and Jenna cried out hoarsely as the coil burst, and she shattered as pleasure rolled over her in devastating waves. Only then he eased his clasp and urged her down. Jenna was shaking, her body still caught in the throes of release.

His eyes were hot, glittering with hunger as he stared at her. Jenna could feel the hard proof of his arousal against her belly, yet he made no move to do more. He thrust his fingers through her hair, holding her gaze.

"You do not need to drink to act wicked and daring," he murmured, pressing a kiss to her forehead before lifting his head to stare into her eyes. "Do you understand me, Jenna?"

A flush raced over her skin. "Yes." She cleared her throat. You also never need to run from me … when I am … uninhibited. I trust you to catch me if I stumble," she said, the confession dragging from a part of her that had been shuttered for so long.

His eyes darkened with emotions, and he buried his face in her hair. "Jenna?"

"Yes."

"That day when … when you saw Lady Knightly pressing her mouth to mine, she only did that once she saw you over my shoulder. I was about to push her away when you spoke."

Jenna sucked in a sharp breath. His gaze was so dark, so regretful.

"I was ending our previous liaison and explaining that I planned to make you an offer of marriage."

"She was your mistress?"

"I did not have the means to put up a mistress, nor did I have the desire to. She was … she was my lover. I vow, from the very first moment I met you, I never visited her again. She heard the rumors of my pursuit of you and wrote to me. I realize it was ungentlemanly of me not to explain my stance. That meeting was to amicably part. Lady Knightly wished to remain as my lover after my marriage and I refused. I imagine kissing me when she saw you was a measure of revenge on her part, since she knew I had ended our relationship because of how I felt about you, Jenna. Not only was I furious at your quick condemnation, but I was also shocked at how easily you believed me to be unworthy and dishonorable."

Pain pierced her chest, and she swallowed against the raw ache inside her throat. "Cillian … I …"

"My pride told me I did not need to explain myself to a lady who would so easily judge me and dismiss everything I had shown her of my character for the last several weeks. I was a damn fool."

"The blame is also mine," she said, biting her lips hard to stop the tears that wanted to spill. "I was foolish and burning with jealousy and betrayal. I always heard of your rakish exploits and … and … I am so ashamed of how easily I ran from you."

He reached out, and a calloused thumb stroked away a single tear that spilled over. Jenna turned into that caress, pressing a kiss against his hand. Her heart squeezed as she now understood the roughness of his skin, a testament to his hard work and sacrifices.

Cillian's touch was gentle, his thumb lingering on her cheek. "I should have fought for you, Jenna. I should have explained, regardless of my pride. I should not have been ruthless and threaten you with blackmail."

"And I should have trusted you," she replied, her voice breaking with emotion. "I should have seen beyond the rumors and trusted what I knew of you."

They had both been fools, letting pride and jealousy tear apart something that could have been beautiful. Yet Jenna still could not bear to think about the possibility of a future. Her heart had been so wounded after they parted it had taken her almost a year before she stopped crying herself to sleep. She'd had to hide her emotional pain from her friends and family, and it had been gut-wrenching and agonizing. The very thought of enduring such emotional distress again sent her heart into a fierce pounding, and a sense of panic crept over her senses.

"Whatever you are thinking about, stop," he murmured, his voice a soothing balm to her frayed nerves. "No more talk of the past … do not think of the future, just be with me. I have no expectations of you."

Jenna's eyes widened.

How had he known?

The depth of his understanding warmed her, easing the fear that had been building. She closed her eyes, a sigh whispering from her when he brushed his mouth gently over hers.

She lay against his chest, feeling the steady rise and fall of his breath. His arms were wrapped securely around her, enveloping her in a cocoon of warmth and safety. Jenna nestled closer, her head resting on his broad shoulder, his heartbeat a calming rhythm beneath her ear. The steady thump-thump of his heart lulled her into a state of tranquility, each beat a silent reassurance of his presence.

As he held her, his fingers traced soothing patterns on her back, easing the tension from her heart. Jenna surrendered to the comfort and safety of his embrace. She closed her eyes and drifted off into sleep, cradled by the strength and warmth of the man who had once broken her heart but now seemed to hold it tenderly.