13. Ciaran

13

CIARAN

I thought the Pacific Ocean would be clear, but it was murky with a taste of grungy seaweed as I dived under a series of cresting waves. At the next cresting wave I attempted to hoist myself up onto the board, but immediately slipped.

I tried again and again, falling each time. After multiple attempts, my arms and shoulders stung and felt like jelly. In my final attempt, the wave crashed hard and the board smacked me in the face.

" Goddammit ," I shouted. I felt the welt swell on my forehead.

That was going to leave a mark.

The surfboard drifted away. I hoped it would eventually make it to the shore. Maybe Matthias would be none the wiser.

Instead, I swam out until I couldn't feel my hands or toes. I wasn't sure what was pushing me. I wanted to drown out the move, my mom's remarriage, leaving all my friends, even the way I regretted leaving Drew. I wished I could do things differently. Maybe I should have insisted on living with Raj until the end of school, and negotiated with Mom that I'd come out to Malibu once the school year ended.

I felt like an idiot for not thinking of that until now.

Also, I wanted to remove Matthias's image from my brain, the way he looked, his handsome cocky stance, the way he looked down at me, like I was beneath his notice. I wasn't a violent person, but I wanted to punch him in the face. Something about him set me off almost immediately. Were we too alike or too different? Time would tell.

Without realizing it, I was far out from the shore. From a distance, the houses on the cliff appeared smaller and the waves much bigger than I'd anticipated. Exhausted, I found it easy to slip under the surface, the water bubbling in my mouth and nostrils.

Overhead, the sky was morphing with dark clouds.

My muscles were screaming at me, but my mind was blissfully numb to my predicament as I slowly registered the fact that I should turn around, that I should make it back to land before the sea took me.

All right, don't be a dumbass, Ciaran. I turned around. Cliffside mansions and palm trees met my gaze. The amount of wealth perched a dozen feet from the edge was staggering to me. With one strong earthquake it would crash hundreds of feet below.

My movements weren't frantic. I floated, letting the current take me as I swam in a lazy backstroke, the stormy sky filling my vision.

However, all of a sudden a solid object crashed into me and I slipped under the water.

I heard shouting. "Ciaran! You fucking idiot."

That voice, I recognized it, even below the gurgling surface of the water. It could be but one person, but why was he yelling at me?

Seconds later, strong arms yanked me up and my head broke the surface.

"I'm fine, you prick." I pushed against his chest, shoving away as I sank momentarily under the water. The shore wasn't too far away now and we'd be able to stand up shortly. "I can swim, in case it wasn't obvious."

"It's obvious you know nothing about the Pacific Ocean, you moron," Matthias growled as we treaded in the water side by side, neither of us immediately moving toward land. His foot touched my mine five times, not that I was counting. "Floating like that, I thought you were fucking dead," he hissed. "Storms can come on suddenly. I promised my dad I wouldn't let you drown in the ocean. And what do you do? You frolic in a pair of boxers during a double red flag warning."

"Swim trunks."

Matthias scoffed. "I'm not surprised you chose to focus on the wrong part of my statement. Don't you know what a double flag means? It means strong currents and rip currents." Matthias was wearing a thick black wetsuit. His dark hair was wet and slicked back away from his forehead. I saw the storm in his eyes, the firm irritation in his perfect mouth. Hurricane Matthias . "You stay out here any longer and I'll strangle you myself."

Why was he so angry? He should want me to drown and be out of his life.

"Let me g-guess," I spat, "no promises to Daddy Dearest about not m-murdering me in other ways?"

Matthias's eyes blazed. Without warning, he shoved me under and I drank half of the ocean. I came up choking on water and coughing.

"I need you to realize that rip currents can fucking kill you." He grabbed me again, pulling me with extraordinary strength to the shore.

"I didn't realize you c-cared so m-much for my s-safety." The rough way he was manhandling me, my head kept bobbing under water. "If I d-drown, it's going to be b-because of you, you f-f-fuck head."

Not that I would admit it, I couldn't feel anything…hands, legs, even my face. I stuttered all of that through chattering teeth, so clearly I wasn't fooling Matthias. I wasn't fooling myself.

He grabbed me by the shoulders, lifeguard style, and before I knew it, he'd all but deposited me on the rocky beach.

Seconds later, he landed directly on top of me, pinning me down. While we were close in size, he was the stronger of the two of us.

He was silent as his eyes inspected mine. He grimaced for a fleeting second, rolling his shoulder. We were inches apart and the lower part of my body betrayed me.

"Don't do that again," he ordered in an out-of-breath way.

Matthias's weight was heavy but not too heavy. It felt…comfortable.

And he wasn't moving or shifting or getting up.

Numbness was replaced with instant heat that spread all over my body. Everything started tingling. Even my heart started pounding.

"Don't do w-what?" I cocked my head. "Piss you off?"

My hand curled in, digging into the rocky sand to keep from doing something stupid, like reaching up and moving aside the hair that fell into his face.

I was aware of his brown eyes, the uneven freckles on his sun-kissed face. His full lips. The way his thick eyebrows arched like he was angry with the world. Angry at me.

He growled at me, guttural and low. "Do you irritate everyone, Ciaran, or is this shitty attitude reserved just for me?"

I wasn't usually this antagonistic, but Matthias triggered something within me.

He needed to realize I wasn't going to fall at his feet and worship him like everyone else seemed to do.

He had wealth but I had standards.

"Maybe you can have one of your servants whip me for insubordination."

Matthias screwed up his face. Then he sighed. The fight left him. Softly he said, "Promise me you won't do that again." With his breath on my ear, my cock twitched to life at the most inopportune moment. "Unless I'm with you."

An explosion of conflicting emotions bubbled within me. I wanted shove him off me. I wanted to drag him down and kiss him.

I wanted to make him like me, but since none of that was likely to happen, I wanted to make him hate me even more.

"I don't do promises, Matthias."

"You don't do dares and you don't do promises. What do you do, Ciaran?" His voice was daring and it came across as seductive to me.

Was he trying to fuck with my mind? Because he sure as hell was fucking with my lower regions.

My nostrils flared and I squirmed beneath him, hoping to hide my physical reaction, hoping beyond all hope that he didn't notice my growing erection.

Then one of Matthias's eyebrows shot up and I knew he felt it. His gaze inspected my bare chest before his eyes traveled lazily down to my swim trunks.

"Well, well, well, Ciaran." He smirked like I'd given him valuable ammunition against me. "I think that answers my question."

I shoved at him just as someone else pulled him off of me.

"Jesus, Matty," a man said in a light Hispanic accent. "Let your baby bro breathe." The man held out a hand, and I grabbed it to come to a standing position. "I'm Filipe, Matty's friend. Welcome to the Bu . You must be Ciaran."

"Yeah, thanks." Filipe started wiping the sand off my back and bottom but I stepped out of his reach. "I got it, man, but thanks."

I felt Matthias's eyes on me, but he remained mute.

"Did Matty try to give you mouth to mouth?" Filipe put an arm around my shoulder, leading me to the cliffside stairway. "Word of advice, Matty drinks surf water, so, you know, stinky breath." He waved a hand in front of his mouth. "I'd think twice if I were you."

"I wasn't—" I stopped once I saw the sparkle in his umber-colored eyes, so I played along. "Matthias tried, but I pushed him off right on time. Thank God you came when you did."

"I got you, my man." Filipe smiled the smile of sun gods at me. I found myself smiling back. I admired his easy, laid-back nature.

Frowning, Matthias was observing me, like he was reconsidering all his previous assumptions about me.

A petite woman came running down the staircase. She also wore a wetsuit. Her long dark hair hung damp at her shoulders. She handed me a large beach towel. "Here you go."

"Thanks," I muttered as I wrapped it around my shoulders. They were all dressed for the chilly water and I was shirtless and goose pimpled all over.

"Are you Ciaran?" I nodded at her question as I dried my face. "Matty's told us all about you."

I glared at Matthias. "He knows nothing about me."

"Oh, that doesn't stop Matty from voicing an opinion." She punched Matthias in the chest, her eyes suddenly accusatory. "What you left out is that your little brother is a hottie."

That took me aback. No one had ever called me a hottie before.

"I—uh…" I stammered. "I'm not his brother."

"Give it a rest, Joan," Matthias said through his teeth. "What he is, is shit for brains."

"Let's get you inside, Ciaran. When it's a double flag, don't go out into the ocean, okay? It isn't safe." She beamed at me like a protective older sister, which took the sting out of her chastisement. "I'm Joan, by the way."

Joan and Filipe carried the conversation, asking me about Las Vegas and my hobbies, while Matthias brought up the rear, grunting answers here or there.

One thing was for sure, I liked Matthias's friends a hell of lot more than I liked him.