Chapter 12

12

D ali

One Month Later

The truth about why Germany was so adamant about marrying Twila had finally come out. She was pregnant. We’d gathered for their co-ed bachelor and bachelorette party and her stomach was poking out of the white mini dress she had on. The baby made things make sense, but it wasn’t a good enough reason to commit to a woman you didn’t want to spend the rest of your life with.

I didn’t subscribe to the narrative that you had to stay in a loveless or toxic relationship for the sake of a baby. To me, that did more harm than good. More than anything, I believed children needed to see a healthy relationship between their parents, whether the relationship was a romantic one or not.

I felt like I couldn’t hold back anymore and really needed to let Germany know how I was feeling, but I knew it wouldn’t change anything for him. This was the first time in my life where I finally understood why our grandmother would end her life talks with, “It’s off me now and on you.” Because even if Germany did nothing with what I had to say to him, it would burn me alive if I didn’t speak up and look out for him.

Since tonight was their night, I decided to talk about it with him in the morning. They didn’t seem like they were in a loving mood, but they weren’t arguing and fighting so that was a plus.

They’d rented one of the only two event venues in Jasper Lane. Mierra’s Memories Ballroom was about ten thousand square feet total and where most weddings and larger gatherings were held in the small town when people didn’t want to go to a bigger city like Memphis or Rose Valley Hills. The space was designed with their two favorite colors—olive green and light yellow.

The room was fairly segregated with Twila’s family chilling and seated while our family was dancing and turning up. It was a distinct visual of how different they were, how different our families were, and another reason to me why they shouldn’t have been getting married. Germany loved to enjoy himself and have a good time, and Twila’s family was boring as hell. I didn’t see him getting close to her father and brother and building bonds with them that went beyond her. Clearly, he didn’t care about that, but it was important to me that I got along with my in-laws well.

Just the thought had me looking over at my date for the evening. Geneva was cool but she wasn’t someone I planned to be with seriously. She was just someone to chill with and fuck to pass the time. Since things didn’t go how I thought they would with Kas, I decided to give her a little space. I hadn’t given up on us, but I also didn’t want her to feel forced to be with me just because I’d retired to pursue her. Honestly, she wasn’t the only reason I retired, but she was a big part of it. The other reason was for my mom’s peace of mind and my health.

Though I had a great record, a hit was a hit. One of my mentors, Haven , was a prime example of how even those with several wins under their belts could still have brain and body damage because of the amount of sparring we had to do in preparation for our fights. I only had two fights a year, but in preparation for them, my training was year-round except for the summers. That was the only time I allowed myself to truly take off and enjoy myself.

After hearing about his health declining and the documented damage done to his brain that led to his early retirement, I decided to start taking my checkups a bit more seriously. I loved boxing but didn’t want to lessen my quality of life as I aged because of it. My goal was to fight every other year until thirty-five, but I eventually decided to retire now so I could shift my focus onto my family. Or, at least, the family I wanted to have with Kassadee.

I hadn’t planned to tell her about that the way I did, but I’d been holding so much from her that it kind of slipped out the day I went over to cut her yard. My plan was to date her and show her that I was serious about friendship being our foundation for more… then I would tell her. It hadn’t worked out that way, though, and as much as I wanted to go after her, I decided to let fate decide.

“Are you enjoying yourself?” I asked Geneva. We’d sat down to take a break from dancing and so I could roll up. She didn’t smoke but she didn’t care about me doing it. Now that I wasn’t in the ring, I was able to do it freely instead of just over the summer.

“Yeah, your people are cool. The bride-to-be seems a little… off. Is she okay?”

I couldn’t help but chuckle as I nodded my head. Now if someone who had just met them could sense something was off… their asses were just choosing to be blind to it.

“Yeah, she—”

“Cuzzo,” Germany called, stepping in front of me.

“Wassup, man?” I stood and shook his hand.

“Why you ain’t let me know you were bringing a date?” He looked back, causing me to look in that direction. “If you would have told me, I wouldn’t have invited Kas.”

Our families had been close for decades so it didn’t surprise me that he’d invited her, especially since I knew Ken would be here. However, when I invited Geneva, I wasn’t really thinking about Kas being here. I figured she wouldn’t come since she’d been avoiding anywhere she thought I would be, and I’d been doing the same to avoid her.

“It’s cool, cuz, but thank you for looking out.”

“You sure?”

I nodded as I looked down at Geneva. “Positive.” Lowering myself to her ear, I told her, “I’ll be back, aight?”

“Okay, boo.”

I decided to go ahead and speak to Kassadee to get it out the way. She looked absolutely beautiful, but that was no surprise. The ginger-colored dress she had on matched her hair and eye makeup. It fit her like a motherfucking glove, showing off the curves I’d fallen in love with. My dick hardened the closer I got to her. Before I stood in front of her, her scent invaded my nostrils.

Kassadee was intentional about her style of dress and perfume when she was single. She dressed for the male gaze and chose perfumes that would make a man’s mouth water. If her scent wasn’t fruity it was boozy. Tonight, she smelled like apple brandy, and I’d be lying if I said her scent didn’t make me want to hold her close, rub my nose against every inch of her, and get drunk off the liquid I could make leak between her thighs.

Speaking of her thighs, they were on full display because of the mini dress she had on. My mind instantly flashed back to the last time they were wrapped around me while I made my home deep in the pit of her wet, fat, warm pussy. Her slanted eyes stared at me as I finally stepped in front of her, and I saw the moment she stopped breathing. Every time I knew my presence or appearance aroused her it was a boost to my confidence—tonight was no different. With a smile, I licked my lips and tried to keep a little distance between us, but with the way she was looking at me that was nearly impossible.

“Hi,” she spoke quietly.

“You look beautiful, Kas. And you smell good as fuck.”

Her head lowered briefly as she blushed. When she met my eyes again, she said, “Thank you. You look really good too. I love this cream on you.”

I looked down at myself absently, taking in the short-sleeved button-down shirt and slacks I’d chosen for the evening.

“Thank you, baby. Uh… I didn’t know you were going to be here. I have a date. Will that make you uncomfortable?”

“Oh.” She squeezed the back of her neck and shifted her eyes. “N-No. You’re single. You can do what you want.”

I don’t know why I thought this would be the time she showed her possession of me. Why I thought this would be the time she showed she wanted me. That she showed she understood the power she had over me. Kassadee could have told me to take Geneva home right now and I’d do it with no hesitation. Instead, I nodded and massaged my chin.

“Have a good night, Kas.”

Nodding, she lowered her head and avoided my eyes. With a huff, I turned and headed back to my table. When I sat back down, Geneva asked me if I was okay. I didn’t realize I was frowning until her pointer finger rubbed the space between my eyes. We mirrored each other’s smiles as I relaxed in my seat.

“Yeah, I’m good,” was what I said, but the opposite was the truth.

Still, it wasn’t fair of me to treat Geneva any differently just because Kassadee had arrived, so I gave myself a quick mental talk and tried to return to the mood I was in before we talked.

I finished rolling my blunt and headed outside to light up. I asked Geneva if she wanted to come because I didn’t want to keep leaving her at the table, but she said no. It was weird trying to integrate her into my life and family, but I was sure we’d get the hang of it for the time being. Even if we were just dating and having sex, she would need to be comfortable around my people. A few of my cousins had been friendly toward her and engaged in conversation, but Geneva wasn’t the most talkative person and I believe she preferred being alone if she wasn’t with me.

Weed breaks had an unspoken language amongst cousins. I didn’t have to say anything for a few of them to know what I was about to do. We all made our way outside and started rotating our blunts. Kennessy and two of Germany’s friends had come out too.

My favorite female cousin came out with Kassadee, and I could tell by Kassadee’s expression that she wanted to stay inside. Journee tugged her forward by her right hand, snickering as she stared at me. Rolling my tongue across my cheek, I chuckled through my frustration. If anyone knew how awkward this shit was for me, it would be Journee. She’d already mentioned Geneva didn’t seem like my type and that she expected me to be here with Kas after I introduced them earlier. Now, her ass was just being messy.

“Wassup, sis?” Kennessy spoke, pulling Kas in for a hug and kissing her temple. “When you get here?”

“Just a few minutes ago,” she replied, accepting the blunt he offered.

We avoided each other’s eyes for a while until Germany and his friends went back inside. That left no one between us. She looked at me for a brief moment before tuning back into whatever Journee was rambling about. I couldn’t stop myself from staring at the side of her face.

“I missed you,” I blurted, and that confession was like the moment everyone had been waiting for. Everyone stepped back and gave us space, though I wasn’t sure that was what she wanted.

“I missed you too.”

“I regret I even told you the truth.”

Her chuckle was low as she took a step in my direction, causing me to step toward her as well.

“I don’t. I needed to know how you felt about me,” she confessed.

“What’s the point in knowing if you’re not going to do anything about it?”

“Who says I’m not? You’re the one that’s been avoiding me for the past month.”

“Yeah, but you’ve been avoiding me too.”

“And now you’re with someone else.”

“That’s… I’m just keeping myself entertained, Kas. What I’m doing with her ain’t got shit on what I’m trying to do with and to you.” I took another step toward her, closing the space between us. “Say the word and I’ll call it off.”

“Kas!” Twila yelled frantically. “Can you please come help the bartender out? He’s swamped.”

“Uh…” She looked from Twila to me for only a second before her expression turned remorseful. “Sorry, Dali. I have to go.”

My mouth opened, but before I could respond she was walking briskly toward Twila. Tonight took me back to our play wedding. She was the flower girl for one of my uncle’s and we had to walk down the aisle together. After that, I told her she was going to be my bride. She agreed. Dynasty was our minister and Ken gave her away. We exchanged rubber bands for our rings that I kept on for too long, causing me to lose the circulation in my finger. Me having to explain why, had my parents dying laughing at my expense.

A smile lifted the corners of my mouth at the memory. It may not have been a real wedding, but Kas was my wife. We just hadn’t made it official yet.

I stayed outside for a while and finished off my second blunt before going back in. The weed did just what I needed it to do. I wasn’t high but I was definitely relaxed and less stressed about craving Kassadee while Geneva was here with me.

Minutes passed and it didn’t take long for Kassadee to get in her zone. As her head bobbed to the music, she made drinks from the specialized menu effortlessly. About forty-five minutes passed before she and the bartender had completely cleared the two long lines that had formed. Up until that point, the cash bar was moving pretty slow. It was Germany’s idea to give free drinks for an hour in hopes that it would cause Twila’s family to loosen up. By the time they decided to do a collective group shot, with Twila having juice instead, it seemed to have worked.

More of her family members were up singing, dancing, and socializing, and I was happy about that. After Kas took her shot, her head shook adamantly as she declined the tip bucket Germany was shoving into her hand. Eventually, his frustration caused him to fold the bills in half and stuff them into the slit between her big ass titties, which made me laugh. Her eyes rolled as she huffed and pulled the money out, then stuffed it into her clutch.

Geneva said she was done dancing for the evening because her feet hurt, but when I saw Kassadee dancing with one of Germany’s friends, I needed to get beside her. I pulled Geneva’s feet into my lap and was about to take her shoes off, but she said she didn’t want to walk around barefoot.

“Do you mind if I dance with someone else?” I asked as a courtesy, though I was going to do what I wanted anyway.

“Go ahead,” she said, massaging her feet.

I made my way onto the dancefloor and between Kas and ol’ boy. Dynasty and Ken immediately made their way in our direction, but I lifted my hand to let them know everything was good. I wasn’t a bully by any means, but niggas knew not to test me, so he stood down with no static.

Kassadee chuckled as I pulled her close. “Where’s your girl?”

“Right here in my arms.”

I expected her to say something that would contradict what I said but she didn’t, instead, she loosened up and danced with me. For the next three songs, Kassadee was the center of my focus—my world. I didn’t care where we were or who was around… All I cared about and could focus on was her. Whether she was twerking against me and letting me put this dick on her, or if it was a slow song that allowed me to hold her close and feel up on her while I looked into her eyes, we switched the vibe and went with the flow.

By the time the fifth song started, I felt someone tap me on my shoulder. Looking back, my heart dropped at the sight of Geneva. I was hoping she wasn’t about to try and have an attitude about me dancing with Kassadee and ruin my mood… and that made me feel like shit. I couldn’t imagine how she felt watching me dance and interact with Kas, but I honestly didn’t care.

“I’m ready to dance now,” Geneva said, stuffing her panties into my hand and kissing my cheek. I wasn’t sure where that came from because she wasn’t the affectionate type. We didn’t cuddle and hold hands, nor did we kiss when we fucked. Hell, I didn’t even eat her pussy because that felt like too intimate of a thing to do with her.

With a chuckle, Kassadee took a step back.

“Aye…”

Kas didn’t wait for me to finish as she walked off. Geneva took advantage and turned to put her ass on me. I was sure she felt how hard my dick was before I gently pushed her forward.

“Go wait for me in the car,” I told her before heading in the direction Kassadee had gone. Absently, I tossed Geneva’s panties onto the dancefloor. They didn’t arouse me and make me want her; they actually turned me off. I was in the zone with my girl and Geneva’s intrusion had ruined that.

Kennessy was ready to give me a hard time based on the frown on his face. He hated when his sister was upset with me, which I could understand. I didn’t feel like I was in the wrong this time around, but I didn’t bother saying that. Instead, I told him, “I’ma fix it,” not even bothering to stop and have a more in-depth conversation.

Kassadee didn’t know I was following her as she entered the one stall bathroom. Before she could close and lock the door, I was stepping inside.

“Dali, what—”

“Do you want me?” The whimper she released was like a dart that went straight to my heart. “In this moment, right now, do you want me?”

“Yes,” she admitted, surprising the hell out of me.

Like magnets, we made our way into each other’s arms… Onto each other’s lips. I didn’t have the patience to be gentle and make love to her, and based on the hungry manner in which she kissed me and tugged at the button on my slacks, Kas felt the same way too. We worked together pulling my dick out, then I picked her up and pressed her against the wall. Pushing her panties to the side, I slipped into the place that had always felt like peace—like heaven on earth.

Over a year had passed since we’d last made love, and I couldn’t even move immediately, afraid I’d cum prematurely. No matter how many women I slept with, none of them compared to my experiences with Kassadee—physically and emotionally. With her, it wasn’t just sex. It wasn’t just an exchange of bodily fluids. It wasn’t just a release. With her, it was yada. It was the act of knowing a person more intimately than anyone else. We weren’t just exchanging orgasms; we were exchanging pieces of our hearts, minds, and souls too.

When I finally felt strong enough to move inside of her, I did. She buried her face in my neck then lifted it and placed her mouth next to my ear. The feel of her breaths and sound of her moans and curses had my eyes squeezing shut as I hissed. She was wet and sucking my shit in tight—deep. I was going to nut quick, and I didn’t even feel ashamed of that shit.

If it was anyone else, I would have been strapped up and still pulled out to cum. Since our first time, I’d never worn a condom with Kas. It wasn’t because I didn’t respect or want to protect her… but when we finally surrendered to our desires, it was always hurried and animalistic.

My seeds coated her walls as I bit down on her shoulder. She came right after, and I waited until her walls stopped pulsing to pull out and lean her against the sink. I slid into her from behind, filling her with deep, swift, hard strokes. With my arm wrapped around her neck, I lost myself in the sound of her moaning and whimpering my name.

“Tell me you know I’m yours,” I commanded against her ear, tightening my arm around her neck.

She clawed at my thighs as her lips trembled. Our eyes remained locked in the mirror though hers fluttered.

“You’re mine,” she moaned breathlessly.

“Tell me you know I belong to you.”

“Mm.” Her back arched as she moaned and squeezed her eyes shut. I slipped my hand under her dress and massaged her clit as her walls tightened against me in preparation for her second climax. “Baby…”

“Tell me.” My hand replaced my arm around her neck as I lengthened my strokes. Tugging my bottom lip into my mouth, I moaned. “Tell me I belong to you.”

She released a sizzling breath before a series of moans escaped her as she came. Her walls pulsed and leaked as she declared, “You belong to me,” in the sexiest voice I’d ever heard. “You’re mine , Dali.” Her gasp before her body shuddered was enough to make me cum again too. “Only mine.”

Our eyes remained locked until neither of us could hold the gaze. I gripped her waist and tried to control my sporadic strokes as I emptied myself inside of her. Low hums and curses escaped me as Kas rested her back against me. Her arm lifted and she lowered my face to her neck. I kissed it twice before gripping it and using it to tilt her head. Connecting my lips with hers, I moaned as aftershocks surged through me.

“I love you, Kassadee,” I confessed against her lips before kissing her deeply.

Sniffling, she pulled away and rested her head on my chest. She took a few breaths then pushed me out of her slowly. I watched her as she wiped a tear and lowered her dress.

“Dali, I…”

“I didn’t say that for you to say it back.” Cutting on the sink, I wet a few napkins and handed them to her. “I just wanted you to know.”

The distress on her face was an indicator of her overthinking. I didn’t want to say or do anything to make it worse. I wanted her to sit with my seeds in her pussy and my love in her mind and heart. For that reason, I made quick work of wiping my dick off before heading out of the bathroom to take Geneva’s ass home. Even if Kas and I didn’t get together any time soon, playtime with other women was officially over.

The Next Morning

I was grateful Germany wasn’t too hungover to meet me for breakfast. Shit got wild by the time I came back from dropping Geneva off. Kassadee had taken over for the bartender and had everybody fucked up. And after what happened with Geneva, I needed the drinks too.

Apparently, when I told Geneva to wait for me in the car, she thought it was for us to have sex. When I made it out there, she was naked in the back seat.

“Damn, sorry. I meant so I could take you home,” I told her, getting into the driver’s seat.

“Why? So you can fuck with that girl? If you wanted to be with her, why did you bring me?”

Since she didn’t start putting her clothes on immediately, I avoided looking in the back seat.

“I do want to be with her, but we can’t be together, which is why I’m single. I brought you here because I wanted you to join me for the evening. I do apologize if I made you feel uncomfortable. I didn’t know she would actually be here.”

She yanked her dress off the seat. “Do you know how embarrassing that was? You introduce me to your people as your date then spend damn near twenty minutes grinding all against her.” Geneva scoffed. “At one point you had so much of her ass in your hand I was sure you were touching her pussy too.”

As serious as the conversation was, I held back a laugh as I hung my head.

“I’m sorry, Geneva. Like I said, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”

“Whatever,” she grumbled. “Just take me home.”

“Are you going to get in the front seat?” I checked, finally looking back at her.

“No!”

I started my Range and quickly swerved out of the parking lot. The quicker I got her home, the better. It took about seven minutes to get to her apartment, and she didn’t even bother letting me finish apologizing before she was hopping out of the back seat and slamming the door.

I thought that would be the end of us, but I woke up this morning to a text from her asking if I was still drunk and out of my mind. I decided I’d stop by and officially end things after talking to Germany.

He trudged in and plopped down at the table with dark shades covering his eyes. All I could do was chuckle.

“This shit better be important,” he muttered, gripping my coffee and taking a sip. “I’m tired as fuck.”

“I bet. The shit was supposed to be over at midnight and we didn’t leave until what… three?”

“Hell yeah.” His head shook as he palmed his ears. “And it’s all Kas’s fault. I should’ve known she was going to get us fucked up.”

I chuckled as glimpses of the night flooded my mind. Twila and her people left, and our side of the family kept the party going. When the older people left, we started smoking and playing the rap music they said they didn’t want to hear. I thought things would be weird between me and Kas because I’d confessed my love for her but that wasn’t the case. Around two in the morning, she did a sideways strut in my direction with a wide grin and glossy eyes.

“You take the panty dropper home?” she asked, sitting on my lap.

I laughed as I wrapped my arms around her. “I did. She mad as fuck too.”

Her expression saddened. “Dali, we were wrong.”

“Anything I do with you is always right. I’on give a fuck who it hurts. I did apologize though, but I don’t want you worrying about that.”

Kas gave me a slow nod before cupping my cheek and kissing me tenderly. “I love you too.”

A lazy smile spread my lips as she stood. She shot me a wink before walking barefoot toward Journee and two other cousins of mine. Watching them hug and dance, rap and laugh, further confirmed the place she had in my heart, life, and family. She belonged with them just as much as she belonged with me.

“So what did you want to talk about?” Germany asked after the waitress came and took his order.

I took a deep breath before I began. “I want you to know it’s not my intention to overstep, but like Granny would say, I gotta get this off of me.”

His head bobbed once as he sat back in his seat. “I feel like I know where you’re going with this but let me have it.”

“Are you marrying Twila because she’s pregnant?”

His head tilted. “Yeah.”

“Germany…”

“Look…” His palms opened as his wrists rested against the table. “I wasn’t blessed to grow up with my pops in the house with me like you and Dynasty. I craved that shit and never got it. Regardless of how I feel about Twila, I’m going to give my child what I never got.”

“I respect that, but do you love her? Do you want to be with her?”

“That don’t matter.”

“It does, cuz. I admire you trying to give your child the two-parent household you didn’t have but say… think about the toxicity they will see and experience if you and Twila don’t do right by each other. You ain’t gon’ stop cheating on her. Is that behavior you want your daughter or son to see and think is okay? You can still be a great father without being with Twila, Germany. I just don’t want to see you make a huge fucking mistake.”

Germany released a long sigh. “I appreciate you lookin’ out, but I got this, cuz.”

“Aight.” I rubbed my hands together as if I could physically wash my hands of his situation. As much as I loved and cared about him, I’d have to detach and let him live his own life. I wanted to trust that he knew what he was doing, but my gut said otherwise.

After that conversation shifted into something lighter, we ended up having a good breakfast. I left there and pulled up on Geneva, grateful she was home so I wouldn’t have to wait to have this conversation. Instead of going in, I leaned against my car and told her to come outside. She made her way out dressed comfortably in a two-piece set that was loose fitting and looked soft and comfortable.

“Hey,” she spoke, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Hey. Thanks for coming out. I’ll make this quick.”

Her eyes rolled as she chuckled. “Seeing as you didn’t text me back, I can already assume what you’re about to say.”

“Still, I want to say it to make sure we’re on the same page.”

“We can’t be on the same page if we don’t agree but go ahead.”

“I don’t want to hurt you or make you upset.”

“Then don’t.”

“When it comes to Kas, it’s not that easy. She’s… a part of me… in ways that I can’t really explain. If we’re in the same room, I feel like I can’t control who I am and what I do around her. Quite frankly, I don’t want to. So I won’t be reaching out to you anymore. I think it’s best if I don’t deal with anyone else while I’m trying to figure things out with her.”

One hand went to her waist while the other ran down her neck. She eyed me from head to toe before chuckling and nodding her agreement.

“Fine, Dali. I guess… Thank you for ending things instead of stringing me along.”

“Of course. And I really am sorry for last night. I hope you know I wouldn’t have invited you and done anything to intentionally hurt you if I would have known she was going to be there.”

Instead of responding, she took a backward step before turning and going back inside. I released a heavy breath before getting back in my car. As much as the thought of being alone and craving Kas plagued me, I truly believed calling things off with Geneva was the right thing to do.