Chapter 16

It had only been a matter of time.

Not that Isla didn't think that Rachel was capable—she knew that Rachel was more than capable—but because she'd been doing so much that Isla had been worried about her. And it was far better that Rach slipped into Littlespace here, at home where she was safe and where no one need make any demands of her, than at the market the following day.

Rachel stumbled through to the bedroom, grabbing her toothbrush and toothpaste, and then headed unsteadily toward the bathroom.

Isla followed her, and her heart broke a little bit when she saw how slowly Rachel was brushing her teeth; the poor angel was so tired that she barely had enough energy for this simple task.

"Come on, babygirl, perch on the edge of the bath there, and let Daddy brush your teeth for you."

It took a few goes, to get the right speed and pressure, but Isla managed it, and the tired but grateful smile bestowed upon her was all the gratitude she'd needed from a very sleepy Rachel.

Who almost walked into the doorframe, when heading back to the bedroom.

"I got you," Isla said, helping Rach around the corner, and into the bedroom. "Can you get undressed on your own, but do you need me to help?"

"Daddy help," said Rach, raising her arms above her head. Well wasn't that just the most adorable sight ever.

Isla helped her girlfriend get undressed, one layer after another, until it was time to get pajamas and help her girl into bed.

"Story?"

Rachel shook her head vigorously. "Cuddles. Just wan' Daddy cuddles."

"I can do that," said Isla. She helped Rachel get under the covers, and then slipped into her bedtime boxers and slid into the bed behind her. "Spoons?"

"Spoons," agreed Rachel, and Isla slipped her arms around her girlfriend, pulling her flush against her body so that Isla could spoon her.

She'd found this position particularly comforting previously, and often quite sexy, but here in this moment, it just felt right.

It felt like home.

They lay there, quietly in the dark, completely content for it just to be the two of them, just to be both of them in the here and now.

Isla heard a sniffle, and held on tightly. Her girl needed to let it all out, and she was going to hold her whilst she did.

"I'm sorry," a plaintiff Little voice said.

"No sorries," said Isla fiercely. "If you need to cry, you cry, babygirl. You've been working so hard for so long, it's no wonder you're feeling a bit tearful."

Rachel wriggled then, moving about until she turned in Isla's arms, and could now face her. "I can cry?"

"You can cry, princess." Isla physically felt Rachel's dam, holding back all of those emotions, burst. Her whole body shook, as if the tears came from her very core, and all of a sudden she had buried her face in Isla's chest and was crying and crying.

Isla held on, carrying her girl through the storm, not letting go for anything. Slowly, she began to rock Rachel back and forth, the gentle motions soothing the sobs until the lessened into some fairly consistent whimpering.

Even then, she didn't stop.

She would keep going until Rachel asked her to stop, keep going until Rachel told her that she needed something else—whatever that something else was.

Eventually, the whimpers lessened, and Isla was able to breathe a sigh of relief. She'd known that hearing Rachel cry was heart-wrenching, she'd experienced that plenty of times over the years, but not being able to fix it never got any easier.

"Daddy?" whispered Rachel, dark, tear-stained eyes raising to look up at Isla, "It's going to be okay, isn't it?"

"It's going to be amazing," said Isla, who genuinely thought it would be. "You've done such an amazing job of working with everyone, that not even meanie TERFs will be able to derail it."

Rachel looked thoughtful. "I really hope not. I just want everyone to feel like they belong, and it seems really unfair that they have to experience that on their way in. It doesn't feel very fair."

"It really doesn't, but we'll all work together, and hopefully they'll have a really positive experience at the market."

"Are you looking forward to it?"

Isla pondered her answer. "I'm really looking forward to seeing it all come to fruition, yes darling."

Rachel frowned. "Your face doesn't look like it agrees."

"Well," said Isla, suddenly forced out of her half-truth, "I am really looking forward to seeing it come to fruition, but I'm also really nervous about talking to so many people."

"But you're good at talking to the people," said Rachel. "You do it at work, and you helped me with all the Big phone calls when I was moving."

"That's exactly it," said Isla. "I'm really great at phone calls, but they can't see me if I don't know the answer to something and have to look it up. And they can't see me panic if something goes slightly wrong."

"That's true." Rachel sounded thoughtful. "Are you going to be okay? You don't have to come to this just because of me."

"I'm not—I'm not," Isla insisted, when Rachel pulled a face. "It's going to genuinely be a good event for the business, and I never know when I might make a connection. The problem is that most of the time I can't talk about aspects of what we do, and this event allows me to do that. That's really cool, not having to filter. And besides, it's not like I'm on my own. Susie's coming too and she's the queen of socialing."

Rachel nodded. "Yes, I believe that that is her formal title." She opened her mouth to continue, but Isla interjected.

"I think it's time you went to sleep though; it's way past your curfew, and if you're tired tomorrow, you're only going to find it more stressful, and I really don't want that for you. So time to sleep."

"Story?" Rachel looked hopeful.

"You've already said no to stories twice! Come on, babygirl, you've got to get some sleep."

"Fine," grumped Rachel, but she snuck a cheeky grin at Isla, who returned it. "Night night, Daddy." She leaned upward and kissed Isla with a gentleness that showed how much she cared. "Thank you for looking after me."

"Oh sweet girl, I feel like it's you who look after me."

Rachel nestled deeper into Isla's arms and Isla sighed happily. Sleep and her girl; what else could she want?