Chapter 12

Those three days together in Brighton, setting up Rachel's home together, were some of the best Isla had ever experienced.

They'd felt close during Covid, with Isla often staying over, crashing on the sofa, but now they were together romantically, and that meant sleeping in a bed, and holding Rachel in her arms for as long as Rach would allow before she got too hot and had to roll over.

It meant afternoons unpacking, and putting things away together, and evenings sat on camping chairs in the courtyard, drinking Pimm's and laughing.

If Isla hadn't known better, she would have said that they were setting up home together.

They weren't though, that would be fast—even by lesbian standards. And as her return to work loomed, she was suddenly beset with the knowledge that she was going to have to leave.

Isla was alarmed by how much the idea of it upset her. It was almost as if those ten years of friendship had fast-tracked them in their relationship, and if they didn't slow down, she'd end up doing something very silly like proposing within two months of dating.

And there was no way she had already planned out exactly how she'd propose, and the kind of ring she wanted to get Rachel. That wasn't a thing that she had done. Not at all.

So when it came to the end of Tuesday, and she had to get ready to head back to London, there was a noticeable dip in the atmosphere at the flat.

"I'm going to miss you," said Rachel, and there was a plaintive note in her voice that almost had Isla quitting her job and moving to Brighton on the spot.

"I know darling, but we'll have a bedtime call every night; and I'll find some nice picture books and read you stories before bed."

"That would be nice." Rachel was in Little mode, she could tell, and it was killing her, to have to leave whilst her girlfriend looked so sad.

"Come here, babygirl." She climbed into the princess tent, and held out her arms for Rachel to come in too. "I know it's hard, but you love Brighton. You'll make some many new friends, and be so much happier down by the sea."

"I do love the sea," said Rachel.

"And we'll talk all the time, and I will come and spend weekends with you, and nothing will have to change. You are my babygirl, my princess, and I am your Daddy."

Rachel nodded. "It's scary though; what if you realize that you don't want me when I'm not around so much."

Isla pressed a kiss to her girl's forehead. She didn't understand how Rachel didn't know how loveable she was. "You are my person," she said, emphasizing ‘my'. "You're mine, babygirl, and no amount of distance is ever going to change that. You've been my person since the day we met. I will always come back to you. I promise."

There was a trembly bottom lip that made Isla's lip want to tremble too.

"I've an idea," she said. "Why don't you get into bed, and I'll tuck you in and read you a story and stay with you until you fall asleep. And then I'll leave. That way you can go to bed Little, and be Big when you wake up, without any of the anxious sad bits in between."

"Okay," said Rachel, and even though she still looked sad, Isla could see that the suggestion was one that she welcomed.

"You go get into your pajamas and brush your teeth, and I'll see if I can find a book to read you in the meantime."

Rachel scampered off, and Isla searched the internet for some books, and, discovering that some of the Peter Rabbit stories were public domain, picked one a starring naughty bunny to read to Rachel.

Dressed in freshly laundered jammies, with little bunnies on them, Rachel was delighted to see the story that Isla had picked out and curled up in bed, sucking her thumb.

"You don't mind, Daddy?" she asked, suddenly anxious, and Isla reassured her that not only did she not mind, she was actually rather looking forward to it.

The book was longer than she'd expected, and as charmed as she was by the pictures, Rachel's reaction was even cuter. She fought to keep her eyes open, finally asleep far before the end of the story.

Isla bookmarked where they were on her phone for the following night, and vowed to pick up the entire Beatrix Potter book set as soon as possible.

Gently kissing Rachel's forehead, she made sure her girlfriend was all tucked in before quietly tiptoeing out of the apartment, closing the door as carefully as she could, and heading back to the van.

It was only when she hit the motorway that Isla started to cry. She had to blink tears back rapidly, so that she could concentrate on the road, and no matter how much she willed them away, they continued to fall.

Somehow, it still felt like a loss, like she was losing something by returning to London. But her job was there, her friends were there, and uprooting your life for a person was never a good idea, and yet Isla still couldn't help but fantasize about what would have happened if she had stayed. What would have happened if they'd gotten a place together, and started this new stage of Rachel's life together?

It was tough, and more than a little heartbreaking.