Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen

Walt

An hour before dawn, Walt crept to the library and chose a single volume from his small, but eclectic collection. Hoping for the best, he tried to wrap it, but without a box, it was still a book masquerading as a present under a tree draped in popcorn and cranberries.

He tried to remind himself that Susan didn’t have preconceived notions about Christmas. No traditions, no great aunt’s famous roast turkey holding a position of honor at a holiday feast she’d never experienced… no nothing.

And fuck if he didn’t want to give her those memories. Judging by the storm building over the mountains, their Christmas snow would be measured in feet, but he wasn’t about to say anything.

Walt wanted her tied to him. He wanted her to tell him she loved him and not while she drifted off to sleep after sex.

Hoping he hadn’t woken her, he climbed the stairs and slid into bed behind her. She snorted, then snuggled deeper into his embrace until only the tip of her nose showed above the edge of the duvet.

Unfortunately, she didn’t stay that way for long. As if she had an internal clock, her eyes opened just as the first rays of dawn crept past the sill of the east window.

“Good morning.” She turned over to face him and kissed his chest, working her way to his lips. “Very good morning.”

“Do you know what day it is?” he asked.

“Mmm.” She rested her head on his outstretched arm. “It’s Christmas morning. I could make pancakes for breakfast. I think I saw some sausage in your freezer too.”

“Or you can go look under the tree to see if Santa brought you anything.”

She rolled her eyes but laughed softly as she got out of bed and put on her clothes from the night before. “I hope Santa didn’t get me anything else. This weekend has been the best gift I’ve ever received, and I don’t have a gift for him.”

Shaking his head, he followed her down the stairs but stopped her before she could head into the kitchen. “Go look under the tree, little one.”

“Oh, Walt…” She stretched up to kiss his cheek and hugged him tightly. “You really didn’t have to get me anything but thank you for thinking of me.”

Deciding she wouldn’t go sit by the tree without some encouragement, he took her hand and led her across the living room to sit on the floor.

“This is for you,” he murmured, handing her the wrapped book.

“Thank you.” She hugged him again and smiled as she felt along the edges. “How did you know books are my very favorite thing?”

“Lucky guess.” He kept his arm around her and added, “Open it.”

He held his laughter inside as she carefully broke the tape on each corner, keeping the paper intact. Watching her made him remember all the times his sisters had fought over the best way to unwrap gifts. Molly liked to shred the paper, while Deidre preferred Susan’s method.

Eventually she lifted the book from the paper, turned it over, and gasped. Her eyes wide, she held it up. “Is this for me?”

“Yes. You enjoyed A Christmas Carol so much, and I thought you might like to read it for yourself while you listen to it.”

“Oh, my goodness.” Her hands trembled as she opened it. “Is this right? It says 1850, I think, and it’s signed.”

Her reaction was everything he’d hoped. Although the book wasn’t valuable—at least in vintage book terms—he knew it would be priceless to her. He was surprised he hadn’t thought of it sooner, in fact. Susan was forever reading when she wasn’t working.

“Yes. It used to be my great-grandmother’s. She got it as a Christmas gift from her grandmother.”

“No.” She shook her head and tried to give it back. “It’s too much. I can’t take something that’s been in your family for so long.”

He brushed a few tears from her cheeks and smiled. “I want you to have it, Susan. Nobody has read it in years, and books are only truly happy when someone is reading them.”

“You make it sound like the book is alive.”

“Who knows? It’s almost two hundred years old. Maybe it is.”

She sniffed back a few tears and gave him a watery smile before crawling into his lap with her new book. “I’ll cherish it forever, Daddy. Thank you so much.”

“You’re most welcome, babygirl.” He rested his chin on her shoulder. “Why don’t you read it to me?”

“I have a better idea.” She wriggled from his lap and tugged his hand to make him get up. “Take me back to bed and I’ll give you a real present.”

Susan

They didn’t make it back downstairs until well after lunch. Her body ached in the most delicious places, and her legs still quivered after Walt taught her what a handheld showerhead could do to her lady bits.

She blamed it on being sore from her first time horseback riding, but she and Walt both knew why she was walking funny.

Not that he let her walk. Instead, they cuddled on the couch and watched an action movie involving a skyscraper that Walt swore was a Christmas film. She supposed it was, considering it took place during a Christmas party.

Although she’d had a wonderful weekend, she couldn’t help thinking everything would go back to normal in less than a day. She’d return to her tiny apartment, and to her daily schedule of work, study, and trying to catch up intellectually to her peers.

Was she happy?

Yes, but also no. It seemed like she would never be able to stop running on a hamster wheel in a desperate attempt to get somewhere else. At least the real world away from the Shepherds offered choices. She didn’t have to be a wife or mother, marry someone just because a man in power said she should, or be subjected to beatings if she displeased a man who had no business deciding her fate in the first place.

She could choose what to do with her life in the outside world, but she didn’t want to choose if she couldn’t have Walt too.

Deciding to enjoy the last of her time with him, she shook off her morose thoughts. He cared for her, at least a little, she thought. He wouldn’t have given her such an extravagant present otherwise.

And she would not bury herself under a blanket to read her new treasure until she finished it—no matter how much she wanted to.

“You know what we forgot?” Walt asked, surprising her from her funk.

“What’s that?” She shifted under Mittens to lean against Walt’s chest.

“We forgot to make cookies. I bought refrigerated dough and some icing, so we still can if you want.”

“No, thanks. I’m not hungry. Maybe…” She blinked back a few tears. “Actually, never mind.”

“No, you don’t, naughty girl.” He kissed the tip of her nose, then touched her chin to make her look at him. “What did you want to say?”

“It’s nothing really.” She tried for a smile, but judging by his arched eyebrow, it fell flat. “I just thought we could make them for the kids at the Caroline when we go to Snow Park.”

“Hmm.” He glanced at the darkening sky and a faint smile curved his lips upward. “That’s not until later in the week.”

“Maybe you could come visit me?” She wished she could take the words back, but they were already out. “I’m sorry. I’m sure you’re busy, and it would mean another trip to Winslow, and?—”

“Or you could stay here,” he interrupted as he held up his phone. “Which, judging by the weather forecast for Coconino County, is going to happen anyway.”

“What?” She took the phone and stared at the screen. “Holy moly! We’re supposed to get a blizzard!”

“Yep.” He tucked the blanket around her and pulled her close. “At least a foot, but probably more. Isn’t it great?”

“I am so sorry.” She tried to scramble free and tripped over Charlie. “I can call someone to come get me. You don’t have to?—”

“Sit down,” he barked.

Her butt hit the couch before she realized what she was doing. “Walt, I need to go. It’s wrong to take advantage of you, and I feel horrible.”

He gazed at her for a few seconds, then his cheerful expression faded. “What’s waiting for you in Winslow, honey?”

“I don’t understand the question.” She squirmed under his hard gaze, feeling like she was in trouble, but couldn’t figure out why.

“Okay. Why do you want to leave?”

“Because I have to!”

“Again, why?”

“Just…” She took a deep breath in an attempt to organize her thoughts. “I’m imposing.”

“You’re about to get snowed in,” he retorted. “Is it me? Do you want to call an end to our weekend? All you have to do is say the word.”

“No, it’s not you. I just?—”

“You just… what?”

Susan lowered her chin until she couldn’t see his face. “I feel like I’m taking advantage of you. I should have looked at the weather, or?—”

Shaking his head, he laughed softly. “Nobody can truly predict mountain weather, Susan, but I’m not going to make you stay if you truly want to go.” He stood, then went to the mudroom for his coat. “But if I’m going to drive through the storm, I need you to tell me the truth about why you want to leave.”

“I don’t want to go!” she shouted, hot tears welling in her eyes. “I want to stay and be with my Daddy forever, but I can’t because you’re too good and I’m not?—”

“Shh, baby.” He swept her off her feet and carried her back to the couch. “It’s okay.”

“No, it isn’t. I don’t want to make you do something you don’t want to. You said just the weekend, and I don’t want to be someone you feel forced to take care of.”

“Hmm.” He rocked her gently, then handed her a tissue from a box on the table. “What would you say if I told you I didn’t mention the storm because I wanted you to be stuck with me?”

“I—” She blinked and scrubbed the wetness from her face. “What?”

“I could have taken you home yesterday and missed the storm entirely, but I’m a selfish old bastard and want you all to myself for as long as you let me keep you.”

“Walt, that’s…” She chewed on her lower lip, wishing she could believe, but knowing she shouldn’t. “I don’t know.”

“What would you say if I told you I prayed for at least a foot of Christmas snow so we could make a snowman and snow angels, then have hot chocolate with marshmallows before I take you back to bed and fuck you until the weather clears?”

“Really?” She got to her knees and straddled his lap, needing to see his face. He gazed at her steadily, with no indecision in his gorgeous blue eyes. “You want me to stay?”

“As long as I can convince you to, babygirl.” He tucked her hair behind her ear. “But I won’t force you. If you want to go home, I’ll take you.”

“But the storm!” She squirmed free and went to the window. “It’s too dangerous.”

He joined her, but didn’t touch her. “Baby, if you need me to, I’d drive through hell to make you happy. This little snow is nothing.”

“Do you really want me to stay?” she asked, wanting to believe him, but needing to be sure.

He smiled and kissed the sweet spot under her ear. “That was my Christmas wish, but if it’s not yours, I’ll take you home.”

Fresh tears burned her sinuses, but she smiled. “Daddy, I do have a gift for you.”

“You’re all the gift I need.”

“Be right back!”

He tried to catch her in a hug, but she escaped and dashed up the stairs. After rummaging through her suitcase, she found her bucket list, including the last page containing the thing she most wanted.

Susan met him at the bottom of the stairs and gazed up into his perfect face as she laid her list in his hands. “I’m giving you my wishes, Daddy.”

“Oh, sweetheart.” The pages fell to the floor, and he lifted her into his arms. “I don’t know what to say.”

“I don’t want to leave. I wished…” She swallowed hard and cleared her throat. “I asked Santa for you to be my Daddy.”

“I asked for you to be my babygirl,” he murmured into her hair.

She took a big, full breath, the tightness in her chest easing. “I should call Kendra to let her know I won’t be in tomorrow.”

“Later.” He wrapped a long arm around her waist and escorted her up the stairs. “Much later.”