Chapter 4

Four

BEN

W hat kind of sick, deranged animal finger bangs their goddaughter?

Me, that’s who.

At least she’s acting happy now that we’ve moved on to finding a tree. Though my eyes scan her carefully just to be sure she is. I am so messed up. How could I let my judgment lapse like that? I make my living off being practical, logical, and controlled. I’m an engineer. That’s what we do.

The absolute longing in her eyes as I spotted her in the doorway called to me. She was helpless, and she needed me . An urge to aid her in any way I could forced my feet to move. I hate seeing her want something and not being able to give it to her. And what she needed in that moment was something only I could provide.

I won’t let any other males touch her the way I just did. She’s mine.

Part of me wonders if she had ever been kissed before tonight. The way she moved against me made me think she hadn’t. She’s so innocent and inexperienced. As we walk around one of the big firs, I slyly adjust myself. I can’t stay this hard the entire month of December. It’ll be too awkward for both of us. Especially after I told her I needed to stay away.

No, she needs to focus on getting a life for herself.

No boys.

I’ll just have to take out these urges on Cindy. A heavy sigh escapes my chest, thinking about her. It’s not that I’ve wanted to, but she’s been there. And she’ll be waiting for me tomorrow night.

“This one is perfect!” Winter holds her arm out and showcases a thick balsam. “Let’s get a selfie with it!” Her beautiful painted smile warms me from the chill of the evening's misty air. Standing behind her, I pull out my camera and snap a photo with us and our tree. Not our first Christmas tree, but the first alone together.

Not as a couple! No… Just a guy and his deceased friend’s daughter celebrating the holiday.

I know I’m quiet as we load up our treasure and head home. She easily finds the box of decorations where I tell her they are and starts in on the lights while I meander around her and slide on some ornaments. Festive music plays in the background, but I’m not here .

“You seem lost in your thoughts, Ben.”

Her voice cuts through my inner torment. Is it weird that I can’t stand her using my name? “Sorry, what? And don’t call me Ben.”

She bounces on her toes and grins. “What do you want me to call you?” Sidling up to me, she places her hand on my chest. “Daddy?”

The blood rushes toward my crotch. “Yes. That’s right.”

Juniper-scented breaths breeze across my chin as she whispers, “You forgot to take me for hot cocoa, Daddy.”

“Fuck, I did. Want me to make some here? I’m sure we can get some tomorrow night, baby.”

“It’s okay. I want to call my best friend, anyway. I think she wants to visit and stay next month.”

My brow furrows. “Next month… I-I’ll be in Japan.” We haven’t discussed her staying longer. Was she thinking this would be more permanent?

“Yeah, I was, um, well… I was hoping I could stay here.”

Knots form in my belly from confusion, nausea, and arousal. Having her here every day would be torture. There’s no way I could resist her that long. I’m barely hanging on now. If my body had its way, I’d shove my cock so deep in her virgin cunt while she slept, she’d never leave. My cum would burrow inside her empty womb, ensuring she was tied to me forever. But that would ruin her future.

“January doesn’t have to stay here. She wants to work at the resort or at Ice Inn Bed and Breakfast. She was a business major like me. But she wants to get away, too. I talked about Crystal Frond so much, I think it stuck with her.”

The carpet almost trips me up when I take a step back from her and place the last ornament on. “Okay. Tomorrow I’ll discuss it with the Grants after you meet with Jake. Do you want to do the star?”

Her smile breaks free across her entire face. “Like when I was little? You hold me to put it on top?”

Shrugging one shoulder, I mirror her grin. “Yeah. Come here, baby.” I grab her and she places the decoration on top and we light it together, the memories of the past flooding my mind differently this time. As I toss an arm around her shoulders and stare at our work together, I crave her. Not just as the little girl I knew, but as a woman. But it tears me up inside that if I took what I wanted, she’d lose her future.

I finally break away and have an uneventful night routine, except that I put a chair under my own locked bedroom door to prevent myself from going into Winter’s room and doing what I so desperately desire. All I can think of when I jerk myself twice during the night is her taste, her scent. And I hate myself for it.

The next morning, I decide to set definite limits. We have an uneventful breakfast and lunch together, even shopping on Main Street in the crowds without event. Except she tries to hold my hand and I let it slip through my fingers reluctantly. Despite that, she seems unperturbed.

After dressing in my tuxedo for the party, I glance at my watch while Winter gets ready upstairs. The sip of bourbon helps calm my nerves. Things will be better once she sees me with Cindy and is around some younger people in town. Maybe working at the lodge will be right for her. She won’t be at home with me all day.

When a cloud of exotic perfume wafts toward my nose, I glance at the stairs and see her. Winter. She’s not my goddaughter anymore. A voluptuous seductress descends, wearing a skintight red silk number that barely covers her generous bosom and has a slit so high up her thigh, it makes my dick leak in my pants.

She’s sin and perfection.

My mouth instantly goes dry. “Baby… You’re breathtaking.”

“Thank you, Daddy.”

It takes every ounce of self-restraint I have not to ravish her. Sweat forms on my back as I place a chaste kiss on her forehead, and she leans her curves into me. But I hold back. Once I place her safely in my SUV, we head toward the lodge.

My best friend since grade school, Jake Connor, has done well with the ski resort. Every year, he puts on a big party for the town that's only secondary to the New Year's event. The string lights that guide us up the mountain set the merry mood, and when the snowflakes drizzle down in a gentle pattern, it makes the atmosphere even more magical.

Winter’s white furry cape covers her shoulders as she steps out of the car once I find a spot to park in. I refrain from touching her, but let my body guide us to the entrance, while she giggles at our surroundings.

“What?”

With an air of wistfulness, she sighs. “It’s everything I remember. I love it here.”

My soul longs to tell her how much I love her, how seeing her here is everything I never knew I wanted until it happened. If I can just be near her and take care of her always. Look out for her, protect her, provide for her every need… That’s all I’ll need. I can put the desire to have my own children aside if I can just be her daddy.

The heavy wooden door lets some of the cozy heat warm us when I hold it open for her. Cindy stands just inside the entrance talking to Bob Fisher, probably about some real estate leads, but pauses when she spots me and Winter.

A broad smile paints her mauve lips as she reaches toward Winter with open arms, but Winter presses her back into my chest, making it less of a hug and more of an awkward pat. “Um, Cindy, this is my goddaughter, Winter. Winter, this is Cindy.”

“Hello, Winter! It’s so good to meet you!”

Winter stiffens until I place my hands on her shoulders. “Nice to meet you. Are you his housekeeper?”

My eyes widen in shock, as do Cindy’s. “Um, no, honey. We date occasionally. We’re seeing each other.”

Winter turns to me and places her hand on my chest. “Oh. He’s never mentioned you before, I apologize. Daddy, can we go talk to Jake now?”

She’s being a brat. I’ve never known Winter to be rude, but my blood boils with embarrassment at her behavior. Snatching her hand in mine, I nod at Cindy and lead Winter away. Jake stands near the back of the main room with several men surrounding him. His secret boyfriend, Ethan, stands on the edge of the circle, sipping a drink. As we meander over, I grip her waist and pull her close so only she can hear me.

“Stop being naughty and behave.”

A smirk jerks at the corners of her bright red lips. “Or what?”

“Winter… I’m not playing a game.”

After a brief meeting with Jake, they arrange for her to start work on Monday. She can get a tour and see which service she’d like to start with first. My best friend’s eyes crinkle as he scans her, then me, as we stand close together. I edge away from her hip a step, but Jake lets a silent laugh fly from his chest. Narrowing my eyes, I give him a warning not to say anything.

“It was wonderful to see you again all grown up, Winter , and I’ll see you soon. Ben, drinks this week?”

“Count on it.” I threaten him with my tone. As we wander away, my phone buzzes in my pocket, and when I check it, he’s texted me.

Jake

Your “goddaughter” is gorgeous… Better make a move quick before she’s taken by one of these ski bums

Flipping my head around, I scowl at him as he chortles out a boisterous laugh. He's my best friend, and I'd never out him, so I know he’d do the same to me. It just irks me that he can read me so well.

Cindy waits for me when I turn back toward Winter. Slipping her hand underneath Winter’s possessively placed one, she sticks it demonstratively on my chest. “Hey, hot stuff. Would you like to have a nightcap? Um, drop off the kids and go to my place?”

Winter grips her fingers and pulls them off me, then steps into my space, blocking Cindy. “Sorry, Ben is too young for you, Cindy , and he’s busy with me this holiday. Isn’t that right, Daddy?”

Cindy’s jaw drops as she looks at me expectantly.

Glaring at my little girl, I lower my voice. “Winter, head to my car right now and wait for me there. We’re going home now .” Handing her my keys, my lips tighten, and I hope she doesn't cause more of a scene. She eyes Cindy up and down with a flick of her long lashes, then departs.

Cindy’s cheeks flash red, and I stammer out some mumbled words. “Um, I apologize for Winter’s behavior. She’s not normally this, uh, rude or possessive, over me. But I haven’t seen her in a long time, as you know. And it’s true. I want to spend as much time with her this month as I can.”

With a strange look on her face, her hand flies to her hip. “Is-is Winter your biological daughter?”

Swallowing, I tell her the truth. “No! Her mother and I were best friends. You knew about Sherry, but we never dated. We were close enough, though, that she made me Winter’s godfather. I feel an obligation to be there for her. She doesn’t have anyone.”

Slowly, her head nods, as if she’s figured something out. It's as if my secret crush on my goddaughter is painted all over my face. Pinching her lips together, I see her nostrils flare as she exhales. “Ben… I think we should go back to being friends. Call me if you, um, need me.”

Hustling to the car, I turn in my seat to the little minx who has such an innocent look on her face that I want to kiss it off. “Home now, Daddy?”

“Yes, baby. We’re going home. And then, I’m going to punish you.”

She seems rightfully nervous on the trip to my house, and as soon as I pull into the garage, I capture her attention with a stern voice. “Winter, go upstairs and take off your dress. Sit on your bed and wait for Daddy. You have been very bad tonight and need to be taught a lesson.”

A smiling gasp parts her wide-open mouth. It makes my cock throb with the need to discipline her and teach her what is acceptable or not. Waving my hand toward the door, I give one last command. “Hurry.”

She scurries out of the vehicle as I take my time to adjust my tie and rip off my cummerbund. By the time I reach my room, I’ve shed everything except my pants and belt.

When I enter her room, her full bosom heaves inside a little strapless red bra. Covering her crossed legs are silky thigh-high stockings, topped with little bows. Her red heels still grace her feet, and a tiny G-string barely covers her mound. She’s everything I could ever want.

I loosen my buckle and slide the belt out slowly as she eyes it and licks her bottom lip. “Bend over the bed, baby. I need to discipline you.”

She nods and tosses her long, blonde ponytail over a shoulder, then stands and bends at her waist. Her perfect round ass hikes into the air. Even from this distance, the wetness covering her pussy lips glistens in the lamplight.

My fingers crawl over her hip to hold her steady. “I will give you two swats with the belt, and you need to count them. Okay?”

“Yes, Daddy.”

“Good girl.” With a large swing, I land the leather on one of her white cheeks, which immediately brightens to a red strip where it landed.

“Ouch! One!”

I switch it up for the next swat, letting my thumb stroke her smooth skin to comfort her. And me. “Two!”

“Good girl. Stand up.” She does, and some tears line her bottom lids. I take her place and sit on the end of her mattress, then pat my thighs. “Lay across my lap, baby. I need to spank you. You deserve a good spanking for tonight, naughty girl. Don’t you?”

She nods and gets into position. Her breasts hang just over my thigh and her bottom is warm under my palm. “Ten swats.” As I strike her cushy tush, I let my hand linger after each one, caressing her. Massaging her generous muscles. Completely unlike what a proper godfather should do. The jarring of her body against me makes my dick surge with need. God, I need her. I want her. I’m so in love with my best friend’s daughter.

“I have to punish you because you were naughty, but Daddy loves you so much.”

Sniffling, she answers. “I understand, Daddy. I’m sorry. I just… I don’t want her with you.”

After the tenth, my fingers venture underneath the tiny slip of fabric, parting her wet pussy lips, then I delve in like I did yesterday. She moans loudly, the sound so erotic I could come in my pants. I circle her clit while thrusting inside her. First with one finger, then I pause. “Baby, do you want Daddy to stick two fingers in?”

She glances back at me with a wanton desire. “Yes, please.”

Slowly, I glide two in, feeling her barrier tighten around me. Some blood oozes onto my fingers. Fuck, if she’s this tight now… I need to get her used to my hand.

“You took your punishment so well.” I slip my hand out and stand up. “Lie back on the bed, baby.”

She seems a bit confused, but does as I tell her to. So obedient. “Slide your panties off for me and scoot down here.” She follows my directions as I kneel at the foot of her bed. Gripping her thighs, I part them and pull her close to my face.

“Daddy! What are you doing ?”

“You deserve a reward, baby. I can see your need and want to fill it. Daddy’s the only one that will. Lie back and let me make you feel good.”

My first taste of Winter is enough to make me hump her bed. It’s a mix of her strawberry-scented bath products and a natural hint of her . The tip of my dick leaks profusely as I delve into her with my tongue, licking from her hole to her apex. As I suck on her clit, she rises off the bed with a squeal so cute that I almost come. Instead, I unzip and pull my hot cock out and grip it, willing it to behave.

With the other hand, I part her pussy and shove two fingers back inside while sucking on her sensitive area. She cries and pants and writhes on my face. Each arch of her back makes me stroke myself harder. By the time I feel her pussy quivering around me, I explode into my palm as she does all over my face. Liquid cum shoots out and coats my mouth as she squirts all over my tongue and lips. I lick it up like a man lost in a desert. My little girl squirts!

By the time both of us come down in waves, I crawl over her, but take my hand still coated in my seed and massage the fingers gently inside her. I know I shouldn’t. But my brain is gone. Pure, unadulterated primal energy makes me do it. Logic has left the building.

Pressing my lips to hers, she licks up her juices on my face as we combine. She wiggles against my cum-coated fingers, getting them deeper inside of her. As if she could go again, she smiles against my mouth. “Daddy… I love you, too.”

Fuck. Oh fuck. I’ve messed with her head so much now. Is it too late to fix this?

What am I doing?

My cum-soaked fingers still inside her cunt, I kiss her tenderly on the forehead and pull them out. “Baby, I need to shower, and you need to go to bed. Jake will want a well-rested employee come Monday. We’ll talk more in the morning.”

She seems saddened by my response, but I feel like a complete asshole. Her words send me somewhere I never thought I would go. If I give into my instincts, I could ruin her life by robbing her of a normal future. I’d have to have children right away. I’m over twenty years older.

But the nagging question that plagues the back of my mind won’t go away.

Am I in love with my goddaughter?

Yes. Yes, I am.